Ch 5
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The knock sounded like the crack of a whip in the silent classroom. Jumping slightly, Lupin turned from the boxes on his desk to face Hermione Granger. Quietly she took in the fresh cuts and the visible bruises on his tired face. Lupin managed a small smile but gave it up when the cut on his lip split open again. Grimacing he motioned for Hermione to enter and took out his white hankerchief. Wordlessly Hermione sat in the tattered leather chair while Lupin tended to his lip.
"So, you're leaving?" She asked him quietly.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. It seems that Professor Snape accidently let slip the nature of my monthly illnesses and well, you can imagine to reactions of the parents when they find out a werewolf is teaching their students. So, I have resigned to save Dumbledore the trouble." Lupin said, sitting on the edge of his desk. Hermione didn't say anything, just nodded. Their eyes were locked together. Sighing, Lupin stood and closed the door to his office. Taking a seat in the leather chair next to Hermione, he sat in silence, trying to think of what to say next. 'Why does this feel like I'm losing someone I love again?'
Another sigh escaped Lupin's lips and he turned to look at the girl next to him. She sat stiffly, her shoulders reflecting the only wearyness while the rest of her radiated a forced formality. He recognized the posture as one of his own. Smiling to himself he reached over and took hold of one of Hermione's hands.
"You know Her.."
"Professor.." They both started at the same time. Lupin motioned for her to continue. Biting her lip, Hermione took a deep breath and met his eyes again.
"I'm sorry I didn't trust you. I called you a hypocrite and at the first test of my own beliefs..I failed miserably. I'm no better then the authors of all the books." Lupin couldn't believe what he had heard.
"No Hermione. You're so very wrong. You have shown me more compassion and kindness in this year of school, then I have seen since my days with Harry's father and Sirius. You were only being the friend I expect you to be. Harry and Ron were in danger and you wanted to protect them. That is a very noble thing."
"To hell with nobility," she said bitterly. "I asked you to trust me and I betrayed you. I'm so sorry." With these last words, her tears broke through. Before she knew it, Lupin had pulled her up from the chair and into his arms. The soft movments of his hand on her back helped calm her erratic sobs. She felt his lips on the top of her head. After a moment she calmed down. Burying her head into his tattered robes, she asked him a muffled question.
"What Hermione?" He asked as he leaned closer. Pulling away slightly, she looked up and saw his face hovering near her own.
"I asked why you kiss me." Lupin felt heat go through his face and he straightend up.
"I uh..I'm sorry. I'm only trying....I want to make you stop crying. To make you stop hurting. I'm sorry, I crossed the line." He said, biting his lip and inwardly scolding himself. 'Now you've done it. She's going to know how you feel for her. For gods sakes, she's 13 Remus! ...No, she's so much more then thirteen...she understands...' The inner battle did not escape Hermione's notice. She pulled on the front of Lupin's robes gently so he would look at her. The tension filled the room like heavy smoke.
"Professor..."
"I'm not your professor anymore Hermione."
"...Remus.." She said, trying out the name again. Lupin's eyes were downcast again. Hermione moved a hand to his face. "Remus. There hasn't been a line for you to cross. It never existed or we passed it a long time ago." Lupin met her eyes and held his gaze there. Bending slightly, he placed a gentle kiss on her right cheek.
"I want you to make me a promise Hermione." He said after he had pulled away. "I want you to be the best witch of your year next year and the year after that and the year after that and after that. I want you to be a friend to Harry and Ron because they need you. I want you to know how much of a difference you've made in my life. And I want you to know that I care deeply for you. When you finish Hogwarts, whatever you decide to do, whatever circumstances you face, I want you to promise me you'll make it. I want you to promise me that after I leave that it wont be the last time we talk. You promised me this before, I just want to make sure that we still have a deal." Lupin spoke quietly. Aware of nothing but Hermione.
When she nodded he let out a sigh of relief. Pulling her into his arms one last time, he hugged her tightly. When he realeased her, there were no more tears in her eyes.
"You have a deal." She said it quietly, but Remus heard it as if she had screamed it. "Goodbye Remus." He smiled gently and kissed her forehead one last time.
"Goodbye Hermione." She turned and opened the door. Taking one last look at each other, they stood for one final moment. Hermione broke away first and walked down the steps and out of the classroom. Out of his life.
Staring after her for a long moment, Remus finally sighed and returned to his packing. 'Goodbye Hermione. I fell in love with you. Perhaps one day, you can forgive me. I am as you so often tell me...human after all.'
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sorry if it's too sappy...well not really but i have to be nice. I have two more chapters on the way tonite. I hope everyone likes this fic. If im not doing a good idea, I really would appreciate someone telling me to quit while Im behind. Thanks for all the reveiws so far.
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The knock sounded like the crack of a whip in the silent classroom. Jumping slightly, Lupin turned from the boxes on his desk to face Hermione Granger. Quietly she took in the fresh cuts and the visible bruises on his tired face. Lupin managed a small smile but gave it up when the cut on his lip split open again. Grimacing he motioned for Hermione to enter and took out his white hankerchief. Wordlessly Hermione sat in the tattered leather chair while Lupin tended to his lip.
"So, you're leaving?" She asked him quietly.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. It seems that Professor Snape accidently let slip the nature of my monthly illnesses and well, you can imagine to reactions of the parents when they find out a werewolf is teaching their students. So, I have resigned to save Dumbledore the trouble." Lupin said, sitting on the edge of his desk. Hermione didn't say anything, just nodded. Their eyes were locked together. Sighing, Lupin stood and closed the door to his office. Taking a seat in the leather chair next to Hermione, he sat in silence, trying to think of what to say next. 'Why does this feel like I'm losing someone I love again?'
Another sigh escaped Lupin's lips and he turned to look at the girl next to him. She sat stiffly, her shoulders reflecting the only wearyness while the rest of her radiated a forced formality. He recognized the posture as one of his own. Smiling to himself he reached over and took hold of one of Hermione's hands.
"You know Her.."
"Professor.." They both started at the same time. Lupin motioned for her to continue. Biting her lip, Hermione took a deep breath and met his eyes again.
"I'm sorry I didn't trust you. I called you a hypocrite and at the first test of my own beliefs..I failed miserably. I'm no better then the authors of all the books." Lupin couldn't believe what he had heard.
"No Hermione. You're so very wrong. You have shown me more compassion and kindness in this year of school, then I have seen since my days with Harry's father and Sirius. You were only being the friend I expect you to be. Harry and Ron were in danger and you wanted to protect them. That is a very noble thing."
"To hell with nobility," she said bitterly. "I asked you to trust me and I betrayed you. I'm so sorry." With these last words, her tears broke through. Before she knew it, Lupin had pulled her up from the chair and into his arms. The soft movments of his hand on her back helped calm her erratic sobs. She felt his lips on the top of her head. After a moment she calmed down. Burying her head into his tattered robes, she asked him a muffled question.
"What Hermione?" He asked as he leaned closer. Pulling away slightly, she looked up and saw his face hovering near her own.
"I asked why you kiss me." Lupin felt heat go through his face and he straightend up.
"I uh..I'm sorry. I'm only trying....I want to make you stop crying. To make you stop hurting. I'm sorry, I crossed the line." He said, biting his lip and inwardly scolding himself. 'Now you've done it. She's going to know how you feel for her. For gods sakes, she's 13 Remus! ...No, she's so much more then thirteen...she understands...' The inner battle did not escape Hermione's notice. She pulled on the front of Lupin's robes gently so he would look at her. The tension filled the room like heavy smoke.
"Professor..."
"I'm not your professor anymore Hermione."
"...Remus.." She said, trying out the name again. Lupin's eyes were downcast again. Hermione moved a hand to his face. "Remus. There hasn't been a line for you to cross. It never existed or we passed it a long time ago." Lupin met her eyes and held his gaze there. Bending slightly, he placed a gentle kiss on her right cheek.
"I want you to make me a promise Hermione." He said after he had pulled away. "I want you to be the best witch of your year next year and the year after that and the year after that and after that. I want you to be a friend to Harry and Ron because they need you. I want you to know how much of a difference you've made in my life. And I want you to know that I care deeply for you. When you finish Hogwarts, whatever you decide to do, whatever circumstances you face, I want you to promise me you'll make it. I want you to promise me that after I leave that it wont be the last time we talk. You promised me this before, I just want to make sure that we still have a deal." Lupin spoke quietly. Aware of nothing but Hermione.
When she nodded he let out a sigh of relief. Pulling her into his arms one last time, he hugged her tightly. When he realeased her, there were no more tears in her eyes.
"You have a deal." She said it quietly, but Remus heard it as if she had screamed it. "Goodbye Remus." He smiled gently and kissed her forehead one last time.
"Goodbye Hermione." She turned and opened the door. Taking one last look at each other, they stood for one final moment. Hermione broke away first and walked down the steps and out of the classroom. Out of his life.
Staring after her for a long moment, Remus finally sighed and returned to his packing. 'Goodbye Hermione. I fell in love with you. Perhaps one day, you can forgive me. I am as you so often tell me...human after all.'
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sorry if it's too sappy...well not really but i have to be nice. I have two more chapters on the way tonite. I hope everyone likes this fic. If im not doing a good idea, I really would appreciate someone telling me to quit while Im behind. Thanks for all the reveiws so far.