Hey everyone!
Here is the long awaited chapter 3. This time we get an idea of what Legolas is feeling.
I have a couple of questions to answer. First as to why I do not respond individually to reviews? No one asked. If you want me to respond let me know, I've no problem doing it just for me I like to go straight to the stories. But I do love all the reviews and they are really helpful. Those who review, you're the coolest!!
Second was about updating so long. The only answer I can give is that this is not an easy topic to write on and I don't like posting until I'm happy with the story. Plus Badger Lord the Beta reader and co-author has to have a read too. I prefer to leave it a day than post a bad chapter, but I try and do it every week.
Third is about the topic. I know it has been done a lot and I will try not to make light on the subject. People who go through grief do not have an easy time of it but many do recover. I think that if we read stories of people like Legolas going through grief and they recover it might help. That's what I think. Also in this story there is no easy fix and often time is the best healer.
Last and probably the strangest question. Robin is my real name. I am a girl. I know there is another spelling, I think its Robyn. No my name is Robin Hyder nickname of Hood. One of these days I will fill in the bio on the net but I always forget when I'm logged on.
Onto the story Elrond comes in here.
Enjoy
Robin ;)
*******************************************************************
When Legolas started to come round everything felt groggy. Opening his eyes a crack he saw Turian cuddled into his shoulder. Legolas looked at his younger brother and tried to remember why he was there. Finding it all too difficult he fell back asleep.
Later when he opened his eyes again his stomach was sick. He started to retch and a bowl magically appeared in front of him. He tried hard to remember why he was sick and what had happened. Indeed he spent a few moments in heavy concentration before he gave up and drifted back to sleep. He felt someone stroke his hair and whisper words of comfort in his ear, or at least he thought he felt that. Did it happen? He wasn't sure.
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Laomir watched over Legolas like a hawk as he began to come around. They had made the difficult decision to leave him sleeping as much as possible until Elrond arrived. Elrond was due to arrive over the next few days. She ran over with a bowl as Legolas began to retch again.
The next day when Legolas began to come around he felt a little more lucid as to what was going on. But fear began to eat into his heart. The dreams. He couldn't see Turian and Legolas began to panic. Where was Turian? He had to protect him! He had to get him to hide!! His head however was feeling fuzzy and it was hard to concentrate. Still in the midst of panic Legolas tried to get up out of bed.
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Laomir saw Legolas trying to get out of bed. She ran over and put pressure on his shoulder forcing him back. She then got a cupful of tea to make him sleep. She pulled up his head enough to open his mouth. Then she spoke in a very gentle voice, "Come on my little elf, drink this it will make it all better. There's a good lad!"
She felt Legolas fighting her but soon the tea had worked and he had no energy to fight her. He fell back against the pillows and Laomir kissed the forehead.
"Now little one, all better."
********************************************************************* Legolas sat by the wall of the balcony looking overlooking the forest. He was still clad in a nightshirt and robe, and his hair fluttered freely in the wind. For the first time since he got here he felt a moment of peace. He knew it would not last, but at the moment Laomir was not fussing around and he could relax.
However, relaxation was difficult in coming. Legolas could feel anger simmering in his blood. For three days they had fed him that foul concoction that made him sick and forced him to sleep. When they had finally stopped it he had to sleep the next number of days out as the concoction was still in his system. With him in this state they had allowed Turian to come to him every night. He never wanted his brother to see him like that. He had spent his life protecting Turian and Noralis from seeing him like that when they were young. Now Thranduil and Laomir decided that Turian should see him. Legolas sat seething.
The trees swayed as the sun tried to shine through them. He could hear the faint yelling from the archery fields. He could also hear the occasional shriek from the same place. Beginners, he mused. Everything was the same, but for him, it wasn't. It never had been. Why did other people lead normal elfin lives? He would have been happy not to be a prince's son and not to be eldest. He would also like to have a mother and brother. How was it that others led nice easy lives and he didn't? Did he wrong someone in another life? Frowning he thought about it more . . . but then anger replaced the thought and he told himself he didn't really care and forced his thoughts away from that.
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A knock on the door brought in Laomir, Thranduil and a dark haired elf. Legolas supposed this was the great Lord Elrond of Rivendell. Apparently he was here to 'help'. Legolas decided this Elrond would be hurt if he gave him a tea to drink.
Laomir and Thranduil he knew tried to be kind though their methods left a lot to be desired. When he first woke both of them were there. They apologized for feeding him that stuff but they said it was necessary. At least they apologized, he supposed. He just hated them for forcing him to relive . . . memories. He knew that Turian was settling down and was relaxed here, and for that Legolas was happy. It would be easier to leave that way. He had kept a close eye on both his brothers since the day they were born. He had done that because no one had done that for him when he had been young. But he had failed. Noralis was . . . Right now he knew Turian was safe and for once he did not want the responsibility of caring for him. Besides, it seemed to him that Thranduil and Laomir seemed to know how to take care of him. As they were royalty whatever they said was to be done. Legolas had to unclench his jaw as he thought of Turian being in the room. He is not to see me ill. He is not to know.
Thinking over these thoughts meant that it took a moment before he knew that Elrond was beside him. Turning to look at him he saw his gaze returned with a small smile. Legolas held his look then returned his attention to the trees. The elder elf began to ask questions in a quiet, gentle voice. For some reason that voice really began to grate Legolas' nerves. It was slick, too nice. He felt like screaming at him to 'Shut up!' Legolas let his mind drift. He had been asked these questions before, but he was damned if he was going to answer to Mr. Slick voice. He began to fade into the sounds of nature when he felt it.
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Elrond had seen the young elf as soon as he had entered, and at first decided that because of youth and innocence that with a smile and a few kind words of pity or help he would be able to help this one.
However on looking into the eyes he almost gasped, he saw pure raw anger. Sitting opposite he tried to reassure the elf but Legolas was staring into the trees of Mirkwood. Elrond wondered what he was to do. This elf may have been over 50 years older than his sons but never in his life had he seen such a young elf with such an expression. He tried to talk and reassure the elf but he knew that the young one wasn't listening.
Sighing in defeat Elrond decided to try another tactic. He closed his eyes.
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Legolas felt Elrond in his mind. He heard a gentle voice coupled by an image of a bird flying.
"Legolas do not fear me. I wish to help."
Fury entered his heart. Help! Would everyone please stop trying to 'help' him!! He shot Elrond a dangerous look. The last time someone tried to help him he couldn't remember a thing for a week. He looked at Elrond and closed his eyes.
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Elrond had been concentrating hard on trying to approach the elf this way. It worked in most cases he had found. Sometimes they needed an image to hold onto. It took a moment before he felt something at his own mind. Before he fully realized what was happening he gasped at what was being shown to him. In his mind the bird was changed to a hideous spider that lunged at him. Then it changed an orc that roared. Elrond opened his eyes and saw a gaze in Legolas' eyes so angry that it took his breath away. He also saw a challenge offered.
Elrond smiled and sent an image of a butterfly. It was flying in the trees, an oak tree. It was happy and relaxed and it stopped on the ground for a moment. However before he could be finished, a boot appeared and squashed the butterfly. Elrond looked at the young elf but Legolas had turned his face away. Elrond decided that it was enough. Standing up he took one last look at the elf still looking at the trees and walked to the door. He had found out enough from this meeting.
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Legolas sighed in relief when Elrond left. Looking down, he saw that his hand was shaking. The final image . . . he had seen it happen . . . it had happened when Noralis was very young. Part of him wanted to ask him to stay, but what was the point? Why had his entire life always been a mess . . . He tried to open his mouth and release a sound when he heard the door click. Instead of the sound asking for help that was going to be released a growl came instead. Legolas had made his first conscious sound. Had Laomir or Elrond realised what it was they would have felt rather horrified.
Legolas clenched his teeth an angry gleam in his eyes. So he wouldn't answer quickly enough now they would probably sedate him. He was dammed if he was going to let that happen. He was not reliving that night again. He got up. Cold, hard, red-hot anger flowed in his veins. He didn't feel like crying now.
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A rather shaken Elrond emerged from the room. He met both Laomir and Thranduil and they walked silently to Thranduil's office. Once inside Elrond almost ran to the fire and grabbed a chair. He gladly took the wine from Laomir and took a few hasty sips.
Thranduil raised an eyebrow in surprise, he had known Elrond a long time and this was the first time he had ever seen him so shaken from a patient. After a few minutes of silence Laomir nodded at Thranduil who sighed and then asking gently in his most non-regal tone questioned.
"Elrond? How is he?"
In return Elrond looked at both of them.
"Firstly he is so full of anger I am surprised his soul has not split. Secondly why did neither of you tell me he is of the Dobracht?"
Elrond took another large gulp of wine and then continued.
"Elbereth! I have never felt the strength of what that elf gave to me today. Never! Thranduil I need to know information like that. He almost ripped me to shreds."
It was about then he noticed his listeners were both in a state of shock. Laomir sat wide-eyed on the chair beside him. Thranduil still holding the decanter for the wine stood still for a moment before putting it down with a thud.
Elrond stopped drinking and looked at them.
"You did not know?"
Laomir blinked and looked at Elrond.
"No, we did not though it explains a lot." She shook her head as if to clear it. It took a moment before she let out a sharp cry. Putting her hands to her mouth tears sprang in her eyes.
Thranduil looked in shock at her reaction before leaping up and going to her. He wrapped his arms around his wife and asked,
"Laomir what is it, my love? What happened?"
Looking at her husband with tears rolling down her face she whispered.
"Thranduil, do you not see? He felt what happened. Dobrachts feel others pain. Oh Elbereth, he felt his father and his brother dying."
Thranduil looked at his wife and Elrond before sitting heavily on a chair. His whole body collapsed. In a strangely calm yet disbelieving voice he said.
"My nephew not only saw and heard, but would have felt the emotional and physical pain of his brother and father being murdered. Is this what you mean?"
Stopping for a moment Thranduil looked at the two of them. Laomir looked into the fire and Elrond nodded. He took a deep breath and looked into Thranduil's eyes.
"There is more. Dobrachts' dreams are different. They relive feelings too. It is difficult to explain but in his dreams he would relive all their feelings. His own included."
After saying this Laomir closed her eyes and tears ran down her cheeks. Elrond looked away from Thranduil and into the fire. Laomir coughed a little before talking in a slow quiet monotone.
"When he first came he would not sleep. He would not eat or sleep. I thought it was just part of grief . . . I never knew." At this she dissolved into floods of tears.
Thranduil leaned back in the chair and ran his hands tiredly through his hair. Leaning forward he bowed his head and placed it in his hands. A muffled voice was heard
"Please tell me that by sedating him we have not made Legolas relive the horror over and over again for all the days he was sleeping."
A heavy silence filled the room at that
Review? Please?
Here is the long awaited chapter 3. This time we get an idea of what Legolas is feeling.
I have a couple of questions to answer. First as to why I do not respond individually to reviews? No one asked. If you want me to respond let me know, I've no problem doing it just for me I like to go straight to the stories. But I do love all the reviews and they are really helpful. Those who review, you're the coolest!!
Second was about updating so long. The only answer I can give is that this is not an easy topic to write on and I don't like posting until I'm happy with the story. Plus Badger Lord the Beta reader and co-author has to have a read too. I prefer to leave it a day than post a bad chapter, but I try and do it every week.
Third is about the topic. I know it has been done a lot and I will try not to make light on the subject. People who go through grief do not have an easy time of it but many do recover. I think that if we read stories of people like Legolas going through grief and they recover it might help. That's what I think. Also in this story there is no easy fix and often time is the best healer.
Last and probably the strangest question. Robin is my real name. I am a girl. I know there is another spelling, I think its Robyn. No my name is Robin Hyder nickname of Hood. One of these days I will fill in the bio on the net but I always forget when I'm logged on.
Onto the story Elrond comes in here.
Enjoy
Robin ;)
*******************************************************************
When Legolas started to come round everything felt groggy. Opening his eyes a crack he saw Turian cuddled into his shoulder. Legolas looked at his younger brother and tried to remember why he was there. Finding it all too difficult he fell back asleep.
Later when he opened his eyes again his stomach was sick. He started to retch and a bowl magically appeared in front of him. He tried hard to remember why he was sick and what had happened. Indeed he spent a few moments in heavy concentration before he gave up and drifted back to sleep. He felt someone stroke his hair and whisper words of comfort in his ear, or at least he thought he felt that. Did it happen? He wasn't sure.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Laomir watched over Legolas like a hawk as he began to come around. They had made the difficult decision to leave him sleeping as much as possible until Elrond arrived. Elrond was due to arrive over the next few days. She ran over with a bowl as Legolas began to retch again.
The next day when Legolas began to come around he felt a little more lucid as to what was going on. But fear began to eat into his heart. The dreams. He couldn't see Turian and Legolas began to panic. Where was Turian? He had to protect him! He had to get him to hide!! His head however was feeling fuzzy and it was hard to concentrate. Still in the midst of panic Legolas tried to get up out of bed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Laomir saw Legolas trying to get out of bed. She ran over and put pressure on his shoulder forcing him back. She then got a cupful of tea to make him sleep. She pulled up his head enough to open his mouth. Then she spoke in a very gentle voice, "Come on my little elf, drink this it will make it all better. There's a good lad!"
She felt Legolas fighting her but soon the tea had worked and he had no energy to fight her. He fell back against the pillows and Laomir kissed the forehead.
"Now little one, all better."
********************************************************************* Legolas sat by the wall of the balcony looking overlooking the forest. He was still clad in a nightshirt and robe, and his hair fluttered freely in the wind. For the first time since he got here he felt a moment of peace. He knew it would not last, but at the moment Laomir was not fussing around and he could relax.
However, relaxation was difficult in coming. Legolas could feel anger simmering in his blood. For three days they had fed him that foul concoction that made him sick and forced him to sleep. When they had finally stopped it he had to sleep the next number of days out as the concoction was still in his system. With him in this state they had allowed Turian to come to him every night. He never wanted his brother to see him like that. He had spent his life protecting Turian and Noralis from seeing him like that when they were young. Now Thranduil and Laomir decided that Turian should see him. Legolas sat seething.
The trees swayed as the sun tried to shine through them. He could hear the faint yelling from the archery fields. He could also hear the occasional shriek from the same place. Beginners, he mused. Everything was the same, but for him, it wasn't. It never had been. Why did other people lead normal elfin lives? He would have been happy not to be a prince's son and not to be eldest. He would also like to have a mother and brother. How was it that others led nice easy lives and he didn't? Did he wrong someone in another life? Frowning he thought about it more . . . but then anger replaced the thought and he told himself he didn't really care and forced his thoughts away from that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A knock on the door brought in Laomir, Thranduil and a dark haired elf. Legolas supposed this was the great Lord Elrond of Rivendell. Apparently he was here to 'help'. Legolas decided this Elrond would be hurt if he gave him a tea to drink.
Laomir and Thranduil he knew tried to be kind though their methods left a lot to be desired. When he first woke both of them were there. They apologized for feeding him that stuff but they said it was necessary. At least they apologized, he supposed. He just hated them for forcing him to relive . . . memories. He knew that Turian was settling down and was relaxed here, and for that Legolas was happy. It would be easier to leave that way. He had kept a close eye on both his brothers since the day they were born. He had done that because no one had done that for him when he had been young. But he had failed. Noralis was . . . Right now he knew Turian was safe and for once he did not want the responsibility of caring for him. Besides, it seemed to him that Thranduil and Laomir seemed to know how to take care of him. As they were royalty whatever they said was to be done. Legolas had to unclench his jaw as he thought of Turian being in the room. He is not to see me ill. He is not to know.
Thinking over these thoughts meant that it took a moment before he knew that Elrond was beside him. Turning to look at him he saw his gaze returned with a small smile. Legolas held his look then returned his attention to the trees. The elder elf began to ask questions in a quiet, gentle voice. For some reason that voice really began to grate Legolas' nerves. It was slick, too nice. He felt like screaming at him to 'Shut up!' Legolas let his mind drift. He had been asked these questions before, but he was damned if he was going to answer to Mr. Slick voice. He began to fade into the sounds of nature when he felt it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elrond had seen the young elf as soon as he had entered, and at first decided that because of youth and innocence that with a smile and a few kind words of pity or help he would be able to help this one.
However on looking into the eyes he almost gasped, he saw pure raw anger. Sitting opposite he tried to reassure the elf but Legolas was staring into the trees of Mirkwood. Elrond wondered what he was to do. This elf may have been over 50 years older than his sons but never in his life had he seen such a young elf with such an expression. He tried to talk and reassure the elf but he knew that the young one wasn't listening.
Sighing in defeat Elrond decided to try another tactic. He closed his eyes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Legolas felt Elrond in his mind. He heard a gentle voice coupled by an image of a bird flying.
"Legolas do not fear me. I wish to help."
Fury entered his heart. Help! Would everyone please stop trying to 'help' him!! He shot Elrond a dangerous look. The last time someone tried to help him he couldn't remember a thing for a week. He looked at Elrond and closed his eyes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elrond had been concentrating hard on trying to approach the elf this way. It worked in most cases he had found. Sometimes they needed an image to hold onto. It took a moment before he felt something at his own mind. Before he fully realized what was happening he gasped at what was being shown to him. In his mind the bird was changed to a hideous spider that lunged at him. Then it changed an orc that roared. Elrond opened his eyes and saw a gaze in Legolas' eyes so angry that it took his breath away. He also saw a challenge offered.
Elrond smiled and sent an image of a butterfly. It was flying in the trees, an oak tree. It was happy and relaxed and it stopped on the ground for a moment. However before he could be finished, a boot appeared and squashed the butterfly. Elrond looked at the young elf but Legolas had turned his face away. Elrond decided that it was enough. Standing up he took one last look at the elf still looking at the trees and walked to the door. He had found out enough from this meeting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Legolas sighed in relief when Elrond left. Looking down, he saw that his hand was shaking. The final image . . . he had seen it happen . . . it had happened when Noralis was very young. Part of him wanted to ask him to stay, but what was the point? Why had his entire life always been a mess . . . He tried to open his mouth and release a sound when he heard the door click. Instead of the sound asking for help that was going to be released a growl came instead. Legolas had made his first conscious sound. Had Laomir or Elrond realised what it was they would have felt rather horrified.
Legolas clenched his teeth an angry gleam in his eyes. So he wouldn't answer quickly enough now they would probably sedate him. He was dammed if he was going to let that happen. He was not reliving that night again. He got up. Cold, hard, red-hot anger flowed in his veins. He didn't feel like crying now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A rather shaken Elrond emerged from the room. He met both Laomir and Thranduil and they walked silently to Thranduil's office. Once inside Elrond almost ran to the fire and grabbed a chair. He gladly took the wine from Laomir and took a few hasty sips.
Thranduil raised an eyebrow in surprise, he had known Elrond a long time and this was the first time he had ever seen him so shaken from a patient. After a few minutes of silence Laomir nodded at Thranduil who sighed and then asking gently in his most non-regal tone questioned.
"Elrond? How is he?"
In return Elrond looked at both of them.
"Firstly he is so full of anger I am surprised his soul has not split. Secondly why did neither of you tell me he is of the Dobracht?"
Elrond took another large gulp of wine and then continued.
"Elbereth! I have never felt the strength of what that elf gave to me today. Never! Thranduil I need to know information like that. He almost ripped me to shreds."
It was about then he noticed his listeners were both in a state of shock. Laomir sat wide-eyed on the chair beside him. Thranduil still holding the decanter for the wine stood still for a moment before putting it down with a thud.
Elrond stopped drinking and looked at them.
"You did not know?"
Laomir blinked and looked at Elrond.
"No, we did not though it explains a lot." She shook her head as if to clear it. It took a moment before she let out a sharp cry. Putting her hands to her mouth tears sprang in her eyes.
Thranduil looked in shock at her reaction before leaping up and going to her. He wrapped his arms around his wife and asked,
"Laomir what is it, my love? What happened?"
Looking at her husband with tears rolling down her face she whispered.
"Thranduil, do you not see? He felt what happened. Dobrachts feel others pain. Oh Elbereth, he felt his father and his brother dying."
Thranduil looked at his wife and Elrond before sitting heavily on a chair. His whole body collapsed. In a strangely calm yet disbelieving voice he said.
"My nephew not only saw and heard, but would have felt the emotional and physical pain of his brother and father being murdered. Is this what you mean?"
Stopping for a moment Thranduil looked at the two of them. Laomir looked into the fire and Elrond nodded. He took a deep breath and looked into Thranduil's eyes.
"There is more. Dobrachts' dreams are different. They relive feelings too. It is difficult to explain but in his dreams he would relive all their feelings. His own included."
After saying this Laomir closed her eyes and tears ran down her cheeks. Elrond looked away from Thranduil and into the fire. Laomir coughed a little before talking in a slow quiet monotone.
"When he first came he would not sleep. He would not eat or sleep. I thought it was just part of grief . . . I never knew." At this she dissolved into floods of tears.
Thranduil leaned back in the chair and ran his hands tiredly through his hair. Leaning forward he bowed his head and placed it in his hands. A muffled voice was heard
"Please tell me that by sedating him we have not made Legolas relive the horror over and over again for all the days he was sleeping."
A heavy silence filled the room at that
Review? Please?