Aragorn found that he could not sleep. He was incredibly tired but slumber would not come to him. He pushed himself out of his bed and walked over to his window seat. He looked outside without really seeing anything. He emptied his thoughts and allowed his emotions to wash over him.
He felt stretched too thinly, as if things were not balanced and he was being used to hold them together. He loved his family but he didn't want to be around them anymore. They were hard to get along with; he wanted to wrap his arms around his brothers and father but at the same time he wanted to kick them. It was hard for him to understand his own emotions and it hurt not to know his own troubles. Sometimes he didn't know what was wrong, and others he could pin point the exact problem. The ache ran deep. Deep within his heart and soul something was eating him away. It felt as if his heart was crying and that the sun no longer shone.
Something wet fell on his hand and he looked down, none too surprised to see tears were falling from his cheeks and landing on his arms. He finally had peace – of sorts; he let the dam break loose and allowed his tears of pain to fall freely. He chuckled through his tears as he remembered a happier time.
Six year-old Estel sat on his window seat crying. His tears were falling freely and he couldn't get them to stop. He had misbehaved and was serving his punishment of seclusion. He didn't turn around when he heard the door open.
"What did you do, Estel? Ada said you were in trouble."
Estel jumped at the soft voice and saw Elladan standing in his doorway. He turned away from the twin and curled up in a ball with his head between his knees. "I made Ada angry and now he hates me."
"Oh, that is not true, Estel! He loves you very much," Elladan told him quietly.
"What happened?" Elrohir walked into the room and sat down next to Estel and Elladan.
"Ada is angry with Estel," Elladan informed his brother regretfully.
Elrohir looked confused. "Why, what happened?"
Estel looked at his brothers and then hid his head in his knees. "I bit Erestor," he muttered into his legs.
The twins had to stifle their laughs and try to be the 'responsible older brothers'. It wasn't working too well for them.
"You…you what?" Elrohir asked, choking on his laughter.
Estel nodded. "I bit Erestor."
"Sweet Eru, Estel!" Elladan exclaimed before erupting into a fit of laughter.
"Why did you bite him?" Elrohir asked interested.
"He was in my way," Estel replied honestly. He felt bad for what he had done, and just wanted to be forgiven for his mistake.
Elrohir rolled his eyes. "You do not do that sort of thing, Estel."
Elladan nodded. "Yes, you cannot bite him because he was in your way."
"When would be a more appropriate time for Estel to bite Erestor?" asked an amused voice from the door.
The three turned to see Glorfindel and Lord Elrond standing in the doorway.
Estel burst into tears again; he didn't want to get in trouble anymore.
"Shush, Estel," Elrond said softly, walking over to his human son.
Glorfindel sauntered in after his friend and walked over to where the family sat. "I think Estel has served enough time in his room," Glorfindel said.
Estel nodded. "I am sorry, Ada."
Elrond ruffled his son's hair affectionately. "You should tell that to Erestor. I believe he still has teeth marks on his ankle."
"You little 'ankle biter'!" Elrohir laughed.
Estel smiled up at Elrohir and the incident was forgiven.
Aragorn sighed sadly; if only things could be so simple again. He sighed wistfully to himself; he knew things were different now. They could not go back to the way they had been. Things had changed. He banged his head against the wall behind him, as if the pain would dull the feelings that troubled him inwardly.
Slowly, he pushed himself from the warmth of his bed and padded towards the door. He opened it and leaned against the door frame. Sighing, he slid into the crook of the door and rested his head on his knees.
Elrohir walked towards his bedroom. His twin had remained to stay with their father but Elrohir would rather be alone. He wanted to ponder over what had happened to his little brother and how the part he had played in causing it.
While he was lost in his thoughts he found that he had walked towards Aragorn's room. He paused when he saw the door open and frowned when he noticed the young man resting in the doorway. "Estel?" He lightly touched his brother's arm, trying to get his attention.
Aragorn hadn't heard his brother come up, as he had been deep in sleep, and jumped when he felt the tap on his arm. He looked up and frowned angrily when he saw it was Elrohir. "What?" He demanded.
Elrohir was taken aback by his brother's harsh tone. "Are you alright, Estel?" He looked the man over, noticing that one of the bandages had split open and blood was seeping onto the tunic.
"Yes," he snapped.
"No, you are not." Elrohir bent down to touch his brother's face. "Let me help you back to bed."
Aragorn sighed. He was hurting both physically and emotionally; it would feel nice to lie down in bed again… "Fine."
Elrohir gripped Aragorn's wrist and pulled the man to his feet. "You need to walk, Estel. I am not going to carry you!"
Aragorn got to his feet and walked slowly into his room. His side was hurting so whenever he stepped with his left foot, he felt the strain. He placed his hand against his side, felt the blood that was seeping through, and groaned. "'Ro…"
Elrohir turned around from where he had pulled the sheets back for his brother. He saw where Aragorn had his hand and nodded. "I know, I noticed it when you were sitting down. Luckily, Ada left some bandages and healing salves in here."
Aragorn made a noise that sounds like another groan. "Can I lie down?"
Elrohir nodded. "Of course." He bustled around the room, picking up bandage and salves that he thought would work. When he had finished, he went back to where Estel was lying on his bed. "Lift the shirt and tunic up please, Estel. It will not take long; there were not any stitches on the wound."
Aragorn nodded and did as his brother told him. While his brother worked, he realized that this was the perfect moment to discuss things. He was nervous about saying something to his brother, but he knew he needed to. It might make him feel better, if it didn't he could always leave. He waited until Elrohir had put everything away before confronting him. "Elrohir, can I talk to you for a moment?"
Elrohir frowned. He wasn't sure what Estel wanted to talk about. "Alright, but you are not going to send me away again, are you?"
Aragorn had the good grace to look embarrassed. "I am sorry; I just did not want to speak with you."
Elrohir nodded. "Do you remember when you were little? You ran away because you thought you were unloved?"
"Yes, I remember," he replied.
"We still love you, Estel. You have just grown up." Elrohir's eyes looked worried, as though he thought Aragorn was going to scream at him. He remembered how angry and upset Estel had been when he had run away.
Aragorn looked at his brother. He had wanted to talk to Elrohir for the longest time, and he had. He had gotten the answer to his questions in those simple words. "Thank you, 'Ro." His voice was thick with emotion. He had always cared for his brother, and it felt good to know that Elrohir still cared for him.
"Would you like to speak longer? I will stay with you for as long as you like," Elrohir said softly, happy that his brother finally wanted to talk.
Aragorn smiled; the first real smile in over a month. "I would like that."
Elrohir kissed his brother's forehead. "Anything to draw you out of this melancholy," he whispered.
Aragorn pulled his brother onto the bed next to him; he had missed talking to Elrohir. He was always a comfort to be around and was such a charming person. "Would you tell me why you got so angry?"
Elrohir looked up at the ceiling, guilt washing over his face. He felt so horrible for what he had done, and the remorse he felt was painful. "I should not have done that. Oh Estel, I am so sorry."
Aragorn was alarmed to see tears in the elf's eyes when he looked into them. "I forgive you, Elrohir, but what happened? How did you become so angry?"
"It was nothing you did," Elrohir clarified. "One of my friends had nearly been killed by Orcs." His tone became disgusted as he talked of the creatures. "They hurt him badly, and I thought he would die. I was so angry and upset that when you started to talk to me I took it out on you. It was so wrong of me, I apologize." Elrohir jumped when he felt Aragorn pull him into a hug, and soon relaxed in his brother's embrace.
Aragorn was sitting his in bed holding his brother close to his chest. "I forgive you, Elrohir. What sort of brother would I be if I did not?"
Elrohir smiled to himself. "You are a good brother." He turned around to look Aragorn in the eyes. "Would you tell me what is bothering you? Please, I want to know what makes you despair. I cannot help but feel helpless whilst you feel so sad."
Aragorn sighed and began the long tale of how things had happened. He explained everything - how he felt when he was alone, when he was with a group, he even told of small things that had been bothering him. He told Elrohir how Legolas had helped him, and felt good when he talked of his friend.
"Legolas is a good friend. He helped you so much," Elrohir commented. He felt slightly jealous that he had gone to Legolas first, but quickly dismissed the feeling. If Aragorn felt that comfortable around the prince, then he was happy he had someone to go to when he couldn't confide in his family.
"Yes, he did," Aragorn agreed.
"Thank you for telling me. Hopefully we can help you now." Elrohir held his brother's gaze until Aragorn looked away.
"I do not know if we can do anything for him," Lord Elrond said from the door. He walked into the room, his robe barely making any noise. Elladan was close behind him, looking somewhat nervous as he followed his father into the room.
"We will be here for him," Elrohir promised.
"Yes, we will be here for you, Estel," Lord Elrond echoed his son.
"Thank you, all three of you. I am sorry for hurting you all. It really was not my intent." Aragorn looked up at their concerned faces and felt so much better now that he had spoken what was in his heart.
"We love you, Estel. We always have," Elladan whispered as he sat down next to Aragorn.
Aragorn pulled the twins into a tight hug before standing to go to his father. "I am sorry, Ada."
Elrond kissed his son's brow. "You have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing at all."
This fic is almost over and I have another one after it. First I will update the other two LotR fic along with my HP one. Review guys!!!!
Responses:
Catmint: Oh, thank you so much for the praise. I love it; you are such a wonderful beta and an even better writer. Please continue to write! I just want to thank you again for all the comments you leave me when you beta read. It makes me into a better write and I am happy to call you my friend. Thank you!!!!!
Shadowfaxgal27: Aw, I know! Poor Estel, the guy is having such a hard time. Heehee, poor twins. How'd you like this chapter?
DreaminofLorien: Thank you! I am happy you are enjoying the story; I hope you continue to like it!
Jacquelinestel: Heehee, so happy you are enjoying this! Please, start posting your next story. I am working on the little Estel fic; you will get to beta soon! Promise! I don't get to see my horsy much, she lives far away.
Celebrimiel Hirilaure: OMG!!! How do I thank such an awesome fan?! You gave me nothing but praise!!! Thank you!!! Heehee I like making people come close to crying. hands tissues just incase! wink
Shadowed Flames: sighs and shakes head he wasn't talking to them then. I guess he got tired of ignoring them. Heehee I really hope you liked the chapter.
Wonky: Heehee, sorry I took so long to post. I know I am doing that, but I have finals! They are sooooo annoying. Hope you enjoy this!!!
Ringmarcel: LOL!!! Your review was my all time fave. Short, simple, and perfect! Thank you! I am so happy you took the time to review even though you had nothing much to say. huggles Thank you for just telling me you are enjoying it!
Jadesaber: I know, they love him so much! I think he finally sees it. Hope you like this chapter. Thanks for reading.
Seeing-spots: Thank you, glad you liked the chapter. Here is MORE MORE MORE!!!
Deppfan1016: Oh I know they are all having a hard time. Poor Elrohir, he is hurting so much. Good thing he can comfort and be comforted. Heehee he finally pushed his pride aside. I hope you like this chapter!
Beling: Heehee continued pain? Wait until you read my next fic!!! Yes, I had fun writing that part about Legolas. If you look close I always have the name of my chapter somewhere in the chapter and the name of the fic somewhere in the fic. Heehee, I love doing that. I know, poor Elladan, Elrohir, Lord Elrond, and Legolas. They are all suffering too.
Boppy: Hey, new reviewer!! huggles I am happy I have a new reviewer…well as far as I know you are new…sorry, I am rambling. No, I like to respond to my reviewers. It makes me feel connected to them, and I also want you to know that I do read each and every review. They are all so special and I love to get them. I capture the emotion well? Oh thank you!!! I am trying really hard. I hope you continue to enjoy this; I really liked your review. Thank you for reading and reviewing, it made me feel good.
Nefhiriel: Oh I know!!! Slash is everywhere!! I don't read or write it so you can browse my other stories, they are slash free. Yes, this is just pure friendship, I don't like slash. I have no problem with homosexuals, but I don't like people editing perfectly good characters. I hope you continue to enjoy my story (well, what is left of it) You are welcome, of course you have nothing to thank me for. I thank you for reading and reviewing. I am not a whole writer if I don't have readers. I bow down to you, thank you!
Lauren: Thank you for reading my fics and telling me how much you like them. I always love how our strange conversations will wander from fics to a goose with a brick around its neck. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!!!