A/N: This is a Vash and Meryl fic, mostly.. though there are implications of Meryl/Knives and Millie/Knives...A LOT OF THEM, later on, that is But, the main coupling is Vash/Meryl and Millie/Knives--not to much, but you know that something's going on.

Love In A Haze

-A Trigun Fan fiction by Fujin Kazano, aka, AJ-

Chapter 1

Meryl sat on the hill outside of the small town that the people now called 'Spring'. The petite woman sat in the same spot that she and Vash had talked on just two nights ago... but now, Meryl was worried over the same legendary gunman. When Meryl first began her job to 'watch over' Vash, she felt as if she was no more than a babysitter! But now she felt something telling her to help and watch over the (seemingly) incompetent man.

Now, Vash seemed so out of reach... so far away, like a stranger on the opposite side of the road! She was helpless! He had left this morning to find his brother and... and... oh! She didn't know what they were going to do when they saw each other! The brother of Vash the Stampede, Millions Knives, what could be wrong with him? What Vash said Knives has done... what could drive the brother of the peaceful and heartwarming man to be so cruel?

Meryl cast her light gray eyes upwards towards the fading blue sky. The moons of the day were beginning to fade and soon, there would be no more light in the sky until the moons lit up again and the stars lead the way for Vash... until they lit the way back to Meryl.

Her ears were stretched out so far towards the way Vash had left that she did not hear the foot steps coming from behind her. "Meryl!" Millie's happy and cheerful voice called out, making Meryl jump and look back at Millie. She sighed and forced a hopeful smile as Millie continued. "Any sign of him yet?"

"Nope! But he'll come back. He'd never leave a good-woman like me behind..." Meryl said hopefully and Millie nodded back.

"Right! I'm sure he'll return twice the man he was, just for you!" Millie laughed, forcing Meryl to stare at her best friend blankly.

"You say the strangest things, Millie!" Meryl said, recovering from the awkwardness. They both shared a small laugh, but Millie's was caught short by a sickening feeling starting at her stomach, then moved to her throat. She turned pale and looked as though she was holding her breath. "Millie...?" Meryl asked as she watched the pale green color rise in her partner's cheeks. "You're getting sick again, aren't you? Let's get you home!" Meryl said and Millie nodded.

"Awight, Meryl," Millie said. She didn't want to take the faithful woman away from her watch, but Millie was grateful for Meryl's help. The past five days had been terrible for Millie's health, but that didn't phase her. Even though Millie didn't worry to much about it, the sickness that kept coming and going worried Meryl.

The girls were silent as they walked to their 'home', but the silence was anything but solemn. They were both taken in by the happy faces celebrating the new well that they had created and it was very hard to be sad on a night like this! Everyone was out and having fun! Millie almost protested when Meryl led her into their house.

Millie yawned loudly. "I'm gonna go to bed... awight Meryl?" Millie said.

"Yeah, you go ahead, Millie. I'm going to stay up for a little while longer." Millie nodded at her, then hugged her tightly.

"Don't worry too much, Miss Meryl!" She said cheerfully, then headed to the back of the house where their shared bedroom is. Meanwhile, Meryl sat down in the living room and turned a chair around so she could watch the wooden entrance to her home. 'He'll come back...' she thought, 'But what if he doesn't...?'

---

As Meryl's thoughts took her farther and farther into the land of dreams, a weak sound of foot steps climbed on the wooden porch of the western-style home. Though Meryl's sleepy senses did not hear the footsteps, she couldn't help but to jump to her feet when she heard someone fondle the locked door nob. Suddenly wide-awake, Meryl rushed to the door, unlocked it, then the door flew back so quickly she nearly hit herself when she opened it.

"Vash!" Meryl cried, over come with joy that he had come back to her... or had he? The dark man in black smiled a weary smile and his eyes glowed behind his orange glasses. They were silent for a moment, until Vash shifted his weight.

"Miss Meryl... we.... Knives needs help!" he said in an exhausted voice as he referred to the white and dark red hump on Vash's back. Once Meryl got a better look at it through the darkness, she realized it was a man!

"Oh my God, Vash! What happened?!" Meryl asked and Vash's eyes were not visible from behind his glasses when she went to search them for an answer. She saw his face drop, then he forced his cheery, fake laugh. Meryl hesitated, but decided not to pry. "I can get your room ready, Take him in there..." Meryl said, then rushed to Vash's room with her small lantern. She lit the room's candles to give it some light, then pulled back the blankets on the bed, then got out extra sheets from the closet in a rush. Quickly, she put some water to boil on the wood stove, then got out the bandages that were once used on Vash.

Meryl was too busy preparing the bandages and first aid she didn't hear as Vash came in and set Knives on the bed. The rusted bed springs screeched under Knives's weight, causing the insurance lady to jump and look over her shoulder.

"Um... Mr. Vash? The bandages are ready... I think it'd be better if you take care of him..." Meryl said gently as she headed out of the room.

"Meryl?" Vash asked as he looked up at her. The small woman stopped mid step to look back at Vash's happy face, "thanks."

After Meryl's heart did a loop-de-loop in her chest, she nodded and exited the room.

---

After close to an hour, Vash came out of his brother's new room with a heavy sigh and a heart twice as heavy. Half-awake, he sluggishly dragged himself into the living room and collapsed on the couch.

"Mr. Vash...?" Meryl's strangely timid voice asked as she walked into the den/living room from her own.

"Hunhh?" Vash's muffled voice came from underneath one of the pillows on the dusty couch. As Meryl approached, she saw Vash stretched out on the pile of dust and pillows that they called a love seat. His body was too long to fit the small couch so half of his legs hung off of it. Meryl walked around the gunman's legs and then stood over him, examining his form through the dusty darkness.

"Are you hurt at all?" Meryl asked.

"Nahuh..." Vash replied, then rolled on his side so that his back was to her.

"Mr. Vash, What happened out there?" she was almost afraid to ask him! He seemed so tense and tired... slowly, Meryl sat down on the cushion beside Vash's back.

"..." Vash didn't answer, but Meryl hadn't expected him to. He, in his own way, was so secretive and never told anyone anything, really. "...there was a fight... a shoot out... him and me... it was horrible..." Meryl looked to Vash, stunned, as he replied.

"...are you ok..?" She tried to ask, but it came out no louder than a small whisper. Vash sat up and he swung his legs off the side of the couch and rested on the floor. He placed his elbows on his knees and looked down at his feet to hide the painfully angst expression upon his face.

"...He practically refused to shoot me... the only reason he did..." Vash put his face in his hands. "...it was my fault... I was going to... he's my brother!" Vash's body began to shake silently.

"I'm sure he had his reasons... as you did, right? But what matters right now is taking care of you both... you're both alive, Vash! That proves you did the right thing!" Meryl said, defending him from himself and trying to calm the man down. Her voice was gentle and caring, as if she was addressing a dying man. For a few moments, both were silent and wrapped up in their own thoughts. "Doesn't that mean anything to you anymore?"

"It does... it's just..." Vash let go of his head as he sat up with closed eyes behind the orange glasses. He set his head on her shoulder. "...I'm just too tired to think right now..." he said. The weight of the large man was not uncomfortable or even unwanted on Meryl's part.

But as Vash the Stampede quickly fell asleep, he left all of his weight on the poor, tired petite woman. "Uh... Mr. Vash?" She whispered as she was losing to the weight. "Vash!!" She whispered harshly, but he was too far gone into the land of sleep. Meryl's body was pushed back onto the couch with Vash on top of her! "Vash!"

"Hmmm?" Vash asked in his sleep.

"Move! Geez... lay off the donuts, Mr. Vash!" Meryl said, more embarrassed than angry. Vash moved his legs back onto the couch, but he wrapped his arms around Meryl's waist! Now he was on his side with the blushing woman right next to him. She tried to slowly scoot away, but he just held on tighter. "Alright, fine..." she said, finding an excellent reason to give in. Meryl laid on her side with her legs bent. 'I could just stay here till he falls asleep...' she thought. Vash lightly snored and relaxed his grip on her... but when she tried to move away...

"Nah uh..." Vash lightly mumbled and pulled Meryl to his chest.

"Mr. Vash! Aren't you going to sleep?!" Meryl asked, pretending to be annoyed.

"Not... 'il... ut...you.." Vash managed to say as he bent his knees to act as a glove around the woman.

"..Why? You want me to fall asleep with you?" Meryl asked as she made herself comfortable, though she was always comfortable with him.

"Yeah..." Vash spoke softly into Meryl's ear, "Meryl? I always wanted... to.... is.... ith... you... snore" Meryl tried to make sense of his words, but he was gone... subjecting to the happy moment, Meryl closed her eyes and fell asleep with a small smile on her face.

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A/N: I know a lot of people don't like the Vash/Meryl couple... but SCREW YOU!! I warned ya!! So... stop sending me flames!! cries I don't want any more bad e-mails...