Disclaimer: I do not own Medabots or any related names and brand,I am writting this fic out of fun and I'm not making any profit from it and I'm poor,please don't sue me! My friend Palladin created the female Space Medafighter X and certain related concepts.
Review replies:
Phantom Kansai: Oh... well that explains it. Well Brass did take out Neutranurse's Neutra-wall by pounding at it non-stop. I'm not planning on returning Basilicus, it would be too difficult to have fit in the story without causing me headaches :p. Beside, the ritual was what you expected, so having the Medamasters back is a nice surprise don't you think? It was also an excuse to create new Medabots. Shadow Knight: Yes Sullah is impressive if I do say so myself. I think the word is Flamethrowing, not throwering. In the Medabots AX game, Phoenix's flame thrower part have a pretty short range and are considered grappling medaparts as odd as it sound. I don't know if it's from anywhere, I came up with the word Tokaryu by combining 'ryu' wich we all know means 'dragon' and the japanese word for 'lizard' wich I know start by 'toka', so Tokaryu means 'lizard dragon'.
AnT: What can I say? I'm having fun trying to fit as many 'dude' in one sentence, it's fun. Rintaro is a funny character to write and I got used to him. I never saw the last episode either, so it probably won'T be the same, I'm not trying to reproduce the show here. I AM reading Mon Wars... nice advertisement dude.
Little game: There's an Asterix reference in there, try to find it!
by:HellRavenmon
Ikki, Metabee, Erika and Brass sat down in one of the seat of the Medadome. It was the first day of official competition, but Team Japan wasn't robattling until the next day, so they came to see their friends, Team Canada face Team England. It was the day after Sullah and Kundar's mysterious return, oh and also their near-defeat at the end of Warbandit.
"This is gonna be cool." Commented Ikki, looking at Metabee.
But instead of replying the Medabot crossed his arm and looked away.
"Are you still mad at me for not putting your Medal in my watch when we lost?" Inquired the boy.
"If you had transported replacement Medaparts I could have taken a shot at Sullah! I missed a chance to Robattle!" Complained the KBT.
"I don't think you would have stood a chance with lesser Medaparts and in a weakened state after using the Medaforce. He did beat Gallahaste and Kantaroth without much trouble." Pointed out Erika.
Metabee growled "I still think I could have been useful."
Brass sighed "I feel like it's my fault Gallahaste and Kantaroth got hurt."
"Don't say that." Replied Metabee, taking her hand (they were sit next to each other in betweem the two humans) " It's that crazy psycho that is bent on revenge.Don't beat yourself for that."
If Brass could have blushed she would have "Thanks Metabee."
"Oh! I just remember, I got an email from Geki and one from Thetis! They saw us on TV! " Declared Ikki.
"What did they say?"Asked Erika.
"Well... Thetis was sad we lost and wish us good luck and Geki... Geki said we looked pathetic and he was ashamed to have lost to us once." Answered the boy, sweatdropping. "And he finished by saying that if we get easily beaten like that again he'll come over from Peru and beat us up too."
"Yeah... that fight WAS pathetic." Commented Erika.
"Hey!" Shouted Ikki and Metabee at the same time.
"Ssssh! It's starting!" Interupted Erika, as Mr. Referee walked up to the central arena. "Hey... how come is there five battle stage and they're only havine one Robattle at a time?"
"The other four are used in lesser tournament. This one is too important to have more than one at once, it would make it difficult for the public to follow the action." Explained Ikki as light were dimed down, expet the ones shining on the battle stage.
"Welcome to the first day of the Tournament! Today's Robattle will oppose Team England to Team Canada! Introducing, to my left, from North-America: TEAM CANADA!" Shouted Mr. Referee, three spotlight coming to life on one side of the hexagon, showing Adam, Sophie, Martin and their Medabots, all waving at the excited crowd.
Team Canada
Team Captain: Adam
#1: Ravenhawk
Medafighter: Adam
TTM-17006
Totem -type
Special Attack: Toma-Axe
#2: Snomotor
Medafighter: Martin
SNO-3116
Snowplow -type
Special Attack: Plow Attack
#3: Harwing
Medafighter: Sophie
HRF-77896
Snowy Owl -type
Special Attack: Cryo Blaster
"And to my right, from Northwest Europe: TEAM ENGLAND!"
The first spotlight light up on a tall middle-age man in a grey suit, complete with Union Jack tie, with a brown beard and short hair. He looked very serious, and he was the captain of the team. His Medabot was beside him. It was obviously male and mostly brown and red. His legs were similar to Gallahaste's, only in red with brown boots looking feet, his chest looked like it was covered with brown fur, like he was wearing clothings, his red shoulder pads were round but adorned with red dragon wings and he looked as if he was wearing black gloves that went up to his elbow. His head looked like a red helmet toped by a small golden crown with a big blue jewel on a center triangle formation. His face plate was white and his eyes blues, he looked like he had a brown square cut beard, but no mouth. The Medabot was equiped with a red cape with a fur collar and a classical sword with a golden hilt sheated at his belt.
The second team member was an older man, this one in a black suit with a Union Jack tie as well. His hair and short beard were grey with white streaks here or there. Ikki realised looking at the team that Team Canada and Team Japan had a lower average age than the rest of the teams, something he hadn't noticed before. The man's Medabot was mostly white and male as well. He had grey armor looking legs but a large white fabric rectangle hung from the front and back of his 'belt'. His white chest was adorn by a big red cross touching the sides. He had blocky white shoulder pads and grey arm with black gloves-like design as well. His head was cylindrical, toped by a small spike and there was a black 'T' shaped hole on the front, revealing two green eyes in the bar of the 'T'. He too had a sword sheated at his belt.
The third and final team member was a younger red headed man, without a beard this time.He was wearing a dark green suit with the same tie as the other two.His Medabot looked like some kind of bird and was male. It had two purple and grey bird like feet with three talon at the front, linked by black legs to it'S purple waist. His lower torso was grey and not well armored and his chest completly black. He had square black shoulder plates from wich came his wings. The wing were mostly made out of two big metal piece, a purple one and a blade like grey one. His grey arm ended by purple forearm. It had no hand but at the tip of his arm were two spinning top shaped metalic objects. His head was long and purple, two red eyes glowing above a long silvery beak..
Team England
Team Captain: Arthur
#1: Pendragon
Medafighter: Arthur
KNG-7953
King -type
Special Attack: Excalibur
#2: Palladin
Medafighter: Richard
IVH-100183
Crusader -type
Special Attack: Danahireih
#3: Branzing
Medafighter: Brian
RVN-830518
Raven -type
Special Attack: Recovery Variation
"This is gonna be just like chess: we take the king out, we win!" Said Adam, slamming his fist into his palm. "Owww..." he added, shaking his hand.
Sophie groaned and walked up toward the edge of the field. The five other Medafighters and Medabot did the same. The team leaders were in the center, facing each other. Branzing took flight and Harwing took place in front of him before she spread her wings, who were much more majestic than the other flyer's. Finally Snomotor stood up in front of the last England Medabot. The two sword wielder then unsheated their sword. Pendragon's sword had no blade at all! Suddenly, like fire, red energy sprung from hilt, forming some sort of energy blade. Palladin's sword was real ,but it started to glow with white energy, making the sword appear three eachs wider than it was.
"Force field activated. Random field selection... ACTIVATE!" Called Mr. Referee.
Above the battle field, a 2D picture apeared floating above the ground, it was a picture of the classical concrete medal shaped field. The picture then got surrounded by a yellow light and the field picture dissapeared, letting place to a mad chain of random field picture appear on the 'screen'. The quick zapping started to slow down and finally locked in place as the light around the picture turned red. The picture was that of a green grassy plain with just a few bumps and a dirt road in the middle and on one side was a huge monolith aiming at the sky.
"The Field is... Monolith Valley!" Declared Mr. Referee as the field transformed underneath the MEdabot's feet, turning to grass and dirt, and to the left side, left of Harwing and right of Branzing appeared the monolith. It was almost as tall as the hologram generators. "Medafighters ready? MEDABOTS... ROBATTLE!"
"Let's end this quickly and let's go for the King!" Called Adam, suddenly looking much more serious, adressing his comment to his Medabot but also his teamates.
"I'm on it!" called Ravenhawk, taking off foreward at a fast, but still visible pace.
Ikki scratched the back of his head, toughful"Strange... Ravenhawk can go much faster than that, to him that's barely jogging."He Commented.
Branzing flew up and then dived toward the advencing Ravenhawk, who was followed by a running Snomotor.
"KEEYAAAAH!" Screeched the raven Medabot, landing a powerful talon kick at the ground were Ravenhawk stood just a second ago.
Branzing was stunned for a second, the massive totem type had stopped and leaped back in less than a second, avoiding his attack. But the raven-type quickly shook it off, flying up to avoid a blue blast from the sky who froze the ground below him.
"You better stay out of it if you don't want to be locked way when we win!" Declared Harwing, who had flew up atop the monolith.
"Grrrr.... I'll knock you down your perch!" Called Branzing flying toward Harwing.
Snomotor kept charging when the white Palladin appeared in front of him, ready to attack with his glowing sword! Snomotor quickly breaked, making some of the dust fly up as he slided quickly, pulling up his large plow-shield.
"STRIKE TRUE DANAHIREIH!" Called Palladin in a dramatic way, with a british accent, as he sliced downward.
Snomotor shrieked in pain and surprise as the tip of the sword hit his shield. It went right through like the hard metal plow was butter and hit Snomotor's wrist right behind it! A large chunk of metal hit the ground as the red and white Medabot leaped backward.
"Nothing can stand in the way of our victory!" declared Palladin.
"Hey! That guy talks Gally... more or less." Commented Metabee.
"Yes but Gallahaste isn't as much of a bragger." Pointed out Brass.
Meanwhle Ravenhawk had resumed his dash toward Pendragon who had stood at the extreme end of the battle field since the begining of the battle. Ravenhawk raised his hammer punch in front of his chest as his axe arm was reeled backward, ready to strike. That's when Arthur decided it was close enough.
"Allright Pendragon! Show him the might of Excalibur!" Declared the England Team Leader.
" EXCALIBUR!" Shouted Pendragon, swinging the energy sword around, sending the blade itself flying toward Ravenhawk like a dangerous laser blast!
The TTM leaped to the side, but he barely had time to land on his feet, touching the ground with his hand, that he had to roll aside, avoiding a new blast. Then as quickly as he could he got up and leaped backward as once again the ground he had stood on exploded by the impact of a laser blast. The crowd was going wild, this fight was young, but it was intense!
"What kind of sword is that thing Ikki?"Inquired Erika, as surprised as Adam seamed to be.
"It's not a sword... that's the thing. It looks like a meelee weapon, but it's actually a long range weapon that shoots energy pulses. I bet that think can't even be used like a sword!" Answered the boy, his eyes glued to the action.
Branzing charged toward Harwing, avoiding a Cryo Blast and delivered a kick to her chest part, creating a small scratch before he passed her and turned around. Harwing quickly turned toward him and started blasting with her right arm madly.
"Keep blasting Harwing! He can't avoid them forever!" Ordered Sophie as the two flying MEdabots started to fly in circle.
Snomotor leaped backward and fired a missile. The projectlie flew toward Palladin at great speed and the Crusader simply stood there. There was a large explosion in wich the white knight dissapeared and Snomotor expected to hear the familiar sound of metal hitting the ground. But to his surprised, Palladin emerged unscratched, his whole body surrounded by the same glow as his sword! Only now, it wasn't as thick on the sword itself.
"Fool! According to the legends, the mystical sword Danahireih grants invicibility to it's pure hearted wielder! Now the legendary weapon is reborn and I posess it!" Declarred Palladin, as the glow concatrated back to his sword and he charged forward.
"Look out Snomotor!" Called Martin "That sword is some sort of energy shield generator, and it can expending it to Palladin's whole body, turning it into an offensive weapon to a defensive shield! Avoid the sword and try to transform!"
Snomotor was stuck on the defensive, avoiding sword slice only by a mere inch each time. He wasn't in the best of position. Ravenhawk sure was taking his sweet time taking out Pendragon, avoiding the laser blasts coming at him at a rabid pace. Meanwhile Branzing had led Harwing to fly around the monolith, each hunting the other in an impossible chase. Harwing and Sophie decided to play it smart and the snowy owl stopped before taking off the other way, only to find the raven gone.
"YOU'RE MINE!" Shouted Branzing from above, diving toward Harwing. In a instant the raven's talons grasped harwing's arm before she could react and the two pointy device on his arm slammed against her shoulder as faint powering up sound was heard.
"Let me go you birdbrain!" Raged Harwing, fghting helplessly against the grasp of the raven.
"You're a bird too remember?" Pointed out Branzing, chuckling as suddenly Harwing felt a sharp pain in her chest.
She looked down as much as she could, only to find the small scratch Branzing had done deepening and enlarging before her eyes!
"Warning,Harwing, 5% damage to chest part... 6% damage to... 7% damage... 8% dam... 9%.... 10%...11%..." Continued on Sophie's Medawatch, the damage were going so fast the Medawatch could barely keep up! " Warning, nanobot malfunction.... 15%... 16%..." It continued.
"What the hell is going on out there?" Asked the blue haired girl frantically.
She heard a laugh from across the field, it was Brian, Branzing's Medafighter "Poor little girl, defeat is imminent! When Branzing touch another Medabot with his arms he can send a signal to their nanobots, to either heal his friend... or damage his opponent! Any scratch can then become a lethal wound! Soon your precious Snowy owl's chest will crumble to pieces!" Declared the red head man.
Sophie growled, she had to do something... she couldn'T believe she had been tricked that easily, Brian had used the field to his advantage... then it dawned upon her.. the field!
"Harwing!" She called "You got to use the field against them! Hurry! You're down to 30%!"
"Right! I'm a respectable lady, no way I'll let all these people see me naked! I'll make you let go of me you ruffian!" Declared Harwing, trying to fly forward, pushing against Branzing's own flying parts.
With one mighty wing flap, Harwing prooved to be more powerful and pushed Branzing toward the monolith. She rammed him against the rock, forcing him to let go before she raised her feet, slammed it against his chest and pushed herself away, flipping in mid-air. She regain stability before the raven type could fall down to the ground and unleashed a series of cryoblast. The stunned Branzing couldn't do a thing and soon he was frozen to the rock! Unable to move to fall.
"Perfect!" Said Harwing, if she could smile she would have.
While all this happened Snomotor managed to swung his damaged fist at Palladin, forcing him to stop his charge, leaving an opponing for the Canadian Medabot to leap to the side, changing into his vehicule mode before landing and speeding away. He quickly wiped around, facing Palladin menacingly.
"Let's play chicken." Snomotor declared, his engine roaring as he sped toward the crusader.
Richard snickered "Fool! W fought CAR type before, Palladin can overpower you with no problem! Danahireih will protect him!" He stated, as the crusader was once again surrounded by his force field, holding out his free hand.
"You forgot something!" Started Martin as Snomotor raced toward his opponent "Snow is heavy, you need lots of strength to push it."
Palladin gasped as Snomotor collided with him at full speed, sending him flying into the air, flipping above the speeding snowplow type and landing hard on his back. In the impact Palladin had let go of his sword and the shield had dissapeared, the weapon standing up, it's tip planted in the ground. The IVH heard screeching tires as Snomotor whip around, ready for a second pass. He quickly rolled on the ground, reaching for his sword, but suddenly a missile hit the ground in betweem him and the sword, sending him back, almost blowing his arm off. Snomotor came in and hit the sword as he stopped. The weapon barely missed Richard as it flew out of the field. Snomotor transformed and pointed his missile launcher at Palladin.
"Don't make me shoot you, I don't you to get confiscated. " He declared.
Adam smiled as his two teamate defeated their opponents. "Okay they had enough fun, time to end this Ravenhawk! UNLEASH THE RAVEN WING!" He ordered.
Ravenhawk dodged a laser blast and stood up, as his axe was surrounded by a dark aura. Pendragon took the chance and sent an energy blast, expecting to hit easily, but his target litterally dissapeared! Ravenhawk appeared to the right, then to the right and finally dashed toward a freaking Pendragon who unleashed a final blast toward Ravenhawk. The Totem-type was about to be hit by the attack when he slashed the air in an horizontal arc, from left to right, with his axe.
"RAVEN WING!" he called, sending a large crescent shaped blast of dark energy!
"The Shadow Sword!" Gasped Ikki.
The Raven Wing overpowered the Excalibur blast, making it dissapear like it had never even been there. The attack was twice as big as the energy blade Pendragon had been shooting during the fight. The blast hit the King -type and sent him flying after an explosion. He landed in a heap of damaged metal at the feet of his Medafighter, his Medal popped out and landed on the ground.
"FUNCTION CEASED! LEADER DEFEATED! THE WINNER IS TEAM CANADA!" Shouted Mr. Referee.
The crowd went WILD! Roaring applauds and cheers. The field dissapeared, letting the frozen Branzing fall to the ground. Harwing gracefully landed, waving at the crowd. An official went to collect Pendragon's Medal as the teams gathered their things. Adam went over to Arthur, extending him hand to the older man.
"I'm sorry you won't see your Medabot for a while. This was a great match, great job." Said Adam.
Arthur seams to hesitate for a moment before a smile crept on his face and he grabbed the hand, shaking it. "Thank you... you were incredible yourself. Impressive finishing move. Thank you for having mercy on my teamate's Medabots."
The six humans shook hands happily. It had been a great experience and the crowd loved it. Snomotor helped Palladin up and was walking him to his Medafighter.
"You rely too much on your sword, but it wasn't an easy victory." He said.
"And you need to show me those flying moves, I'm not use to fighting flying enemies." Said Harwing, helping the still slightly frozen Branzing to his Medafighter.
"Anytime you want m'lady." Said Branzing in a polite tone.
Mr. Referee walked up to the center stage as the two teams left the arena. Sophie stopped for a second, seeing the official carry the Medal in another corridor that led to the Arena. From her point of view she could see a red door. She made a mental note to investigate later. This rule still sounded fishy.
"In two days Team Canada will be facing the winners of the USA VS Iceland match that will happen later today! But for now, today's second match: Egypt VS Australia!" He called "To my left, from North-Africa... TEAM EGYPT!!"
Once again three light shone onto three pair. The first one was a woman with dark skin and black hair in a beautiful egyptian style aquamarine dress. She didn't look very enthusiastic, or motivated. Her Medabot was the Sphinx type that Ikki and his friends had sean in the preparation room. The other two were two men, one tall, the other short, both dark skin, bald and dressed in very basic clothing, a white t-shirt and kakhi shorts. Their Medabots looked a lot like the Sphinx, the only diferences were the head and arms. The second one had a head like that of a Ram and had a hammer fist for left arm and from his right arm came a short...spear. The third had the head of a falcon or a hawk and was holding two short sword with birds head at the tip of the handles. They were based on two other types of Sphinx seen in Ancient egypt.
Team Egypt
Team Captain: Patra
#1: Armachis
Medafighter: Patra
SPX-11214
(Andro)Sphinx -type
Special Attack: Heat Beam
#2: Ramses
Medafighter: Ali
CSX-21214
Criosphinx -type
Special Attack: Plow Attack
#3: Horus
Medafighter: Numerobis
Hsx-31214
Heriacosphinx -type
Special Attack: Falcon Sword
"AND TO MY RIGHT TEAM AUSTRALIA!!" Added Mr. Referee.
Ikki suddenly jumped off his seat "Com'on guys, let's go see our friends!" He proposed.
"Yeah I could get their impression for an article!" Agreed Erika.
"Good idea." Added Brass.
"You're not leaving me behind!" said Metabee.
The gang walked up stairs as Mr. Referee called his famous 'Robattle'. Sounds of metal hitting metal were heard, a loud noise and then, just as Ikki pushed the door leaving out of the dome when he felt a familiar sensation behind him, someone was using the Shadow Sword.
"FUNCTION CEASED! LEADER DEFEATED! THE WINNER IS TEAM EGYPT!" He called.
"WHAT?!? Allready?" Asked Ikki, in schocked as he looked back at the battle field.
There, in the middle of a vanishing rocky plains the three Australia Medabots were on the ground, all three had ceased functioning. The crowd was wild, some of them didn't seam happy at how fast it went. The Australian Medafighters were shocked and felt to their knees.
"Woh... looks like Warbandit and Ravenhawk aren't the only tough challenge in this tournament." Commented Erika.
"Let's... let's go." Managed to say Ikki, leading the way out.
" Well at least it's not Faros..." Added Metabee, following his Medafighter.
----------
"That was quite impressive." Commented Gallahaste.
"I'll say." Added Gwen, putting back the armor plating on her Medabot's arm.
Gwen was in her living room watching TV while she finished repairs to Gallahaste. She had already gotten a new shield and a new chest plate, but the damage to the arms were superficial enough for her to tackle them by herself. They had just watch Team Canada's great victory over England and now Egypt totally overwheleming performance against Australia. The phone suddenly rang and Gwen quickly reached for it.
"Hello! Who is it?" She asked.
The girl gasped "Shadow Rose K! What do you... yes, yes Gallahaste is fully repaired, thanks for caring but how did you... ok... you want me to do WHAT?!? Yeah but still... aww don't take that tone you sound like a little kid... allright I'll do it... *Sigh* Tomorow before the match? Where? Got it... bye."
"What did the Shadow Rose wanted?" inquired Gallahaste as Gwen shut down the cordless phone.
"Polish your shield Gallahaste! It seams we'll be in this tournament after all!" Simply answered the girl.
----------
"Who were you calling my darling?" Inquired Koji as Karien walked out from behind a tree, catching up with him,Alexia and their Medabots.
"My mother, to tell her we'll be late."Lied Karin, stopping next to Neutranurse.
The three of them, along with Neutranurse, Sumilidon and Diama were trying to find the entrace of the Medadome, but after half an hour of walking they just found themself at a dead-end in front of the outer wall of the dome and in betweem two buildings.
"I knew we shouldn't have followed your indication." Groaned Alexia, shaking her head.
"Don't be mad at Koji, he's not use to knowing the way anywhere, he always leave that job to his driver." Said Karin, trying to apologize for the rich boy.
"I see... too good for having a sense of orientation Koji?" Asked Alexia, sweatdropping.
"Off course!" He simply answered, turning his back to her. "Tell me dear, why weren'T you there yesterday to cheer us on?" Asked Koji to Karin.
"I was cleaning." Answered the girl with a smile. "And I lost track of time. You know how it is when you're having fun."
"Riiiight..." Said Alexia, sweatdropping as she looked over a map of the Medadome coumpound and around her.
"Look over there!" Pointed out Diama.
Betweem the Medadome and the building to their left there was just enough space for the kids and Medabots to pass.
"Maybe we'll find an entrace if we go on the other side of that building! Let's go gang!" Declared the Shaman Aprantice, her Medabot following her.
"Who made you the leader?" Asked Koji angrily, before he slipped on a patch of ice.
"I did." Answered the girl, giggling at her prank.
"Shamans..." Groaned Koji, getting up.
The little group enter the narrow passageway. It was very dark, the sun being blocked on both side by buildings.
"I hope there's no bubbbuubbu bu bu bugs in this place." Stuttered Koji.
"Wuss." Whispered Alexia, making Diama giggle softly.
The six then emerged out of the tunnel. Finding themself in a strange place. They in some sort of inner court yard, stuck in betweem three buildings and the Medadome itself. There was a large garage door leading inside the dome and in front of it a large ramp going down into an underground tunnel that went underneath the buildings and seam to head toward the outside of the coumpound. Alexia unfold the map and scratch her head.
"Great, you led us to another dead end. It's creepy here." Complained the boy.
"That's weird, there's no tunnel indicated anywhere on this map.... what a piece of garbage." Said Alexia, making the map burst on fire and fall into ashes. " Let's go explore that tunnel! It's suspiscious!" She declared.
"I don't think that's a good idea..." Started Koji until a spider lowered in front of his face. "AAAAH! BUG!!!" He screeched, running down the ramp and into the tunnel, quickly followed by Sumilidon.
"Mister Koji!" Called the Medabot.
Karin giggle, putting away the plastic spider at the end of a wire she was holding "It works everytime. Let's go Alexia."
"I'm starting to like ya." Commented Alexia as the two girl and two Medabots went down in the dark tunnel.
None of them were aware of the silent alarm they had tripped, or of the surveilance camera that watched them as they trek down the large dimly lit tunnel.
"Intruders...must be... destroyed..." Whispered a figure, watching a surveilance monitor, before floating out of the room.
To Be Continued...
This tournament is filled with powerful opponents. It is a brutal tournament where the weak are swatted away by the strong like they are flies. Will Japan be another fly on the wall or will they be the one doing the swatting? What was that phone call really about? What is that mysterious tunnel? Where does it lead and who is watching our heroes? Don't miss the next chapter of Third Challenge!
AN: Aren't you happy when I make big chapters like that? It's really stimulating having to write a robattle that doesn't include Metabee :p it's refreshing hehehehe.
Metabee: HEY!
Me: Shut up! I don't do 'Talk to the characters' bits!