Elizabeth pulled back. This was too fast. But she didn't want to let go of him. Robert smiled almost shyly at her. "We were going to walk."
"Okay. Let's walk." She didn't let go of his hand and they turned toward the softly lapping water.
"Why me?" he asked the silence.
She laughed softly, "what do you mean?"
"Why did you pick me? You could have anyone. I don't have that much to offer."
"Robert humility doesn't suit you." She looked at him earnestly. "Plus, I'm not all that you think I am."
"Right, love is blind." He said, before he realized what he was admitting. "Sorry."
"You must think I'm blind if you think I didn't know that. Doesn't mean I understand it, but…" she tried to lighten the mood.
Robert pulled her to face him. "Elizabeth, you know me. You know what you're getting. And I need to be sure that you really want that because there's only so many times that I can watch you walk away."
"Trust me Robert."
"It's not that easy." He looked away.
"Yes it is." She lifted her hand to his face and made him look at her.
"No it's not. As much as I just want to enjoy this – I know better. You've got me. All of it. Whether you want it or not. I'm completely lost. Don't you see that I'm just falling deeper and deeper? If I run now then I might surface alive. I can sound like I've got it all together but I'm terrified of you."
She stood there shell-shocked. She knew it already – to some extent. But he'd just said it – spelled it out. There could be no pretending now. No games. She needed to tell him where she stood. And she needed the perfect words. NOW. None came. He tried to walk away but she still held his hand and she wouldn't let it go.
"Don't go." She breathed.
"I can't stay."
"Why not?"
"Self-preservation." He challenged her with his eyes.
"No – don't. I have to tell you…" still. No words.
"What?"
"I… I… Don't walk away. Give me a chance. Surely we could be worth that." Her voice was breaking. "Just don't leave me. Not like this."
"What do you want Elizabeth?"
She suddenly realized she knew that. "I want you to believe that I love you. And that it doesn't matter what you do. Even if you walk away now. I don't know exactly what this is; it's fairly new to me. But I can't say goodbye."
"I don't know how to believe you"
"What will it take? I… LOVE… YOU." She smiled. "I really do. If I didn't then I wouldn't have returned you note, or stopped to talk to you this evening…"
"Actually yesterday evening." He interrupted.
She smiled and shook her head. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be. Okay?"
He nodded his head and almost smiled.
"Don't scare me." She pleaded and touched his shoulder as if asking for permission to touch him.
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "Sorry." He whispered. He hadn't thought he could love her any more than he already did but apparently he was wrong. She held him tight – maybe she needed him as badly as he needed her? "I'm not very good at this." He apologized.
"Neither am I." She pulled back. "So we'll stuff it up, but we'll stuff it up together."
He smiled.
"You should smile more. It suits you." She took his hand again.
He gave her a silly grin.
"That's the one," she laughed.
"Good to know you're easy to please." He pushed her playfully down the beach until her feet were in the water.
"Hey, that's cold." She jumped and splashed him. He just laughed at her.
"Oh, toughen up." He kicked the shallow water in her direction.
"Oh, you're paying for that." She kicked water at him.
"Hey, hey. I have not-so-water resistant parts." He turned so his prosthetic was protected by the rest of his body.
"That's so not fair." She stopped splashing and returned to his side. "If you're gonna give it you've got to be able to take it."
"You're no fun." He took her hand, grinning innocently.
She shook her head in mock disapproval. "I will have my revenge."
"Oh, gosh, what have I done now?"
"You have no idea."
"What makes you so sure I can't read your mind?" he asked mischievously.
"Yeah, okay." She slipped her arm around his waist and turned her head to face him as they walked. "Go for it."
"Ummm…" he hummed. "You are thinking about how cold your feet are? No. You want more coffee?"
"Try again."
"Do I get a hint?"
"Not yet."
"You want to go to bed – I mean, not with me, I mean…" he fumbled.
She laughed at his nervousness, "No. But it does have something to do with you."
"You're wondering if I'll ever guess what you're thinking." He grinned, "Gotcha!"
"No. I was wondering if you were going to kiss me again." She looked straight ahead as they kept walking as if she'd never said it.
He stopped walking and held her hand so she was forced to stop and face him. "I don't think I could resist," he touched her chin and kissed her softly. Then he drew back to look at her as he ran his hand along her jaw line and down her neck and arm. He took her hand in his and lifted to her lips, covering it in kisses. Then he worked his way back up her arm, her neck. When he finally reached her mouth she was desperate for it.
They soon tired of the beach and returned to the shop for their shoes.
"Four hours till dawn." Robert looked at his watch. "We should probably get some sleep."
"I want to go home." Elizabeth admitted. She was tired. But she didn't want to say goodnight or goodbye.
"Yeah. We can share a taxi." Robert phoned for a cab and wrote a quick thank you note to his brother then they went to wait outside.
When they got to Elizabeth's Robert told the driver to wait while he walked her to the door.
"Stay." She asked.
"I don't think that's a good idea. I mean, don't get me wrong, I want to. But we're both exhausted and there's plenty of time…"
"No, I didn't mean we would… I just want you to stay. I'm not ready to say goodnight yet."
"Elizabeth you can't stop yawning."
"So, I may not be the greatest company. Please?"
Robert knew he'd lost that battle. "Yeah." He nodded and went to pay the driver.
"Okay. Let's walk." She didn't let go of his hand and they turned toward the softly lapping water.
"Why me?" he asked the silence.
She laughed softly, "what do you mean?"
"Why did you pick me? You could have anyone. I don't have that much to offer."
"Robert humility doesn't suit you." She looked at him earnestly. "Plus, I'm not all that you think I am."
"Right, love is blind." He said, before he realized what he was admitting. "Sorry."
"You must think I'm blind if you think I didn't know that. Doesn't mean I understand it, but…" she tried to lighten the mood.
Robert pulled her to face him. "Elizabeth, you know me. You know what you're getting. And I need to be sure that you really want that because there's only so many times that I can watch you walk away."
"Trust me Robert."
"It's not that easy." He looked away.
"Yes it is." She lifted her hand to his face and made him look at her.
"No it's not. As much as I just want to enjoy this – I know better. You've got me. All of it. Whether you want it or not. I'm completely lost. Don't you see that I'm just falling deeper and deeper? If I run now then I might surface alive. I can sound like I've got it all together but I'm terrified of you."
She stood there shell-shocked. She knew it already – to some extent. But he'd just said it – spelled it out. There could be no pretending now. No games. She needed to tell him where she stood. And she needed the perfect words. NOW. None came. He tried to walk away but she still held his hand and she wouldn't let it go.
"Don't go." She breathed.
"I can't stay."
"Why not?"
"Self-preservation." He challenged her with his eyes.
"No – don't. I have to tell you…" still. No words.
"What?"
"I… I… Don't walk away. Give me a chance. Surely we could be worth that." Her voice was breaking. "Just don't leave me. Not like this."
"What do you want Elizabeth?"
She suddenly realized she knew that. "I want you to believe that I love you. And that it doesn't matter what you do. Even if you walk away now. I don't know exactly what this is; it's fairly new to me. But I can't say goodbye."
"I don't know how to believe you"
"What will it take? I… LOVE… YOU." She smiled. "I really do. If I didn't then I wouldn't have returned you note, or stopped to talk to you this evening…"
"Actually yesterday evening." He interrupted.
She smiled and shook her head. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be. Okay?"
He nodded his head and almost smiled.
"Don't scare me." She pleaded and touched his shoulder as if asking for permission to touch him.
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "Sorry." He whispered. He hadn't thought he could love her any more than he already did but apparently he was wrong. She held him tight – maybe she needed him as badly as he needed her? "I'm not very good at this." He apologized.
"Neither am I." She pulled back. "So we'll stuff it up, but we'll stuff it up together."
He smiled.
"You should smile more. It suits you." She took his hand again.
He gave her a silly grin.
"That's the one," she laughed.
"Good to know you're easy to please." He pushed her playfully down the beach until her feet were in the water.
"Hey, that's cold." She jumped and splashed him. He just laughed at her.
"Oh, toughen up." He kicked the shallow water in her direction.
"Oh, you're paying for that." She kicked water at him.
"Hey, hey. I have not-so-water resistant parts." He turned so his prosthetic was protected by the rest of his body.
"That's so not fair." She stopped splashing and returned to his side. "If you're gonna give it you've got to be able to take it."
"You're no fun." He took her hand, grinning innocently.
She shook her head in mock disapproval. "I will have my revenge."
"Oh, gosh, what have I done now?"
"You have no idea."
"What makes you so sure I can't read your mind?" he asked mischievously.
"Yeah, okay." She slipped her arm around his waist and turned her head to face him as they walked. "Go for it."
"Ummm…" he hummed. "You are thinking about how cold your feet are? No. You want more coffee?"
"Try again."
"Do I get a hint?"
"Not yet."
"You want to go to bed – I mean, not with me, I mean…" he fumbled.
She laughed at his nervousness, "No. But it does have something to do with you."
"You're wondering if I'll ever guess what you're thinking." He grinned, "Gotcha!"
"No. I was wondering if you were going to kiss me again." She looked straight ahead as they kept walking as if she'd never said it.
He stopped walking and held her hand so she was forced to stop and face him. "I don't think I could resist," he touched her chin and kissed her softly. Then he drew back to look at her as he ran his hand along her jaw line and down her neck and arm. He took her hand in his and lifted to her lips, covering it in kisses. Then he worked his way back up her arm, her neck. When he finally reached her mouth she was desperate for it.
They soon tired of the beach and returned to the shop for their shoes.
"Four hours till dawn." Robert looked at his watch. "We should probably get some sleep."
"I want to go home." Elizabeth admitted. She was tired. But she didn't want to say goodnight or goodbye.
"Yeah. We can share a taxi." Robert phoned for a cab and wrote a quick thank you note to his brother then they went to wait outside.
When they got to Elizabeth's Robert told the driver to wait while he walked her to the door.
"Stay." She asked.
"I don't think that's a good idea. I mean, don't get me wrong, I want to. But we're both exhausted and there's plenty of time…"
"No, I didn't mean we would… I just want you to stay. I'm not ready to say goodnight yet."
"Elizabeth you can't stop yawning."
"So, I may not be the greatest company. Please?"
Robert knew he'd lost that battle. "Yeah." He nodded and went to pay the driver.