Disclaimer: See Chapter One.
Never explain -- your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.
Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
Chapter Three
"Die Saotome!" Ryouga cried, unleashing a storm of bandannas, as he charged.
"Feel the wrath of the Blue Thunder, demon!" Kuno shouted, sprinting towards Goku.
"Ranma, what sort of perverted thing did you do to her!?!" Akane screamed, wielding one of the gym's hockey sticks like a scythe.
In the center of the courtyard, Ranma and Goku stood back to back, preparing to face their opponents. Each stood in an identical stance, but their expressions were radically different.
"Wow! This is going to be great!" the younger fighter enthused.
Ranma, unlike his companion, knew exactly how much trouble the two of them were in. Ryouga, Kuno and Akane were out for blood and Goku was in cursed form. Victory would require a miracle. Slowly, Saotome's expression morphed to a smirk. Miracles were Ranma's stock in trade.
Leaping over the spinning bandannas, Ranma decided to meet his opponent in the middle. A blurred umbrella strike blazed towards the pigtailed martial artist's stomach. He spun out of the attacks path, replying with a verbal riposte: "C'mon Ryouga! What sorta man are ya doin' girly attacks like that?"
"Damn you, Saotome!" Grabbing another of his seemingly limitless supply of bandannas, the fanged martial artist tried for a repeat of the trick he'd pulled at Jusenkyo, attempting to wrap one of his bandannas around his long time rival's wrist.
"Feh! You think I'll fall for that again!" Moving at speeds exceeding normal human vision, Ranma's leg shot forward in a kick, knocking the weapon from Ryouga's hand. Then, the pigtailed fighter back flipped out of range of any counters his opponent might attempt. "Jeez, Ryouga! Whaddya been doin' the past week? A parked car coulda dodged that!"
That was when Akane finally entered the fray. "Take this, you pervert!" The hockey stick descended towards his head. Once again, Ranma dodged effortlessly.
"Get outta here, Akane! This is a man to man fight!"
From the crowd, Hiroshi remarked, "Again with the gender confusion. How sad, in such beautiful girls."
"What do you mean man to man!?! She's a girl!"
"No, you idiot! He's cursed, just like me!"
Akane's eyes widened momentarily. "What you mean he's really a-"
"I am nothing like you, Saotome!"
Before he could prepare his defenses, a massive uppercut plowed into him, sending him flying back a dozen feet. Ryouga followed. "I'm going to destroy your happiness! Now you see the fruits of my training! Eight Hands Attack!"
Ryouga's arms blurred to the point that, by all appearances he had four times his original complement of arms. Then, a seemingly infinite barrage of blows began to rain down upon Ranma. Barely capable of dodging, the heir to Anything Goes was being pushed to his limits by his Hibiki's new technique. "Darn it! This has got to have some sort of weakness! Wait! All he's doing is pulling off one of the illusion things pop likes to use. So all I've got to do is focus and..."
Ranma's arms shot forward, grabbing the only two real limbs. "Nice try, Ryouga, but there's no way some wimpy technique like that's gonna stop me!"
"Wimpy! How dare you!?! For that, Ranma, I'll kill you!"
"Nope! Ya already said yer killin' me fer a buncha other stuff! So, what's yer problem, anyway?"
"How dare you pretend you don't know!?! Lying to me about how to swim to Japan, you scum!"
Ranma blinked owlishly for a moment and then remembered to whom he was talking. "Um, Ryouga. I told you to swim straight across the sea to the big island."
"I know! Those cursed lies had me swimming all the way around the world!"
"Whaddya mean? How could you miss Japan? It's huge!" Exactly, but you didn't tell me which island, so I ended up swimming for days, and then the dinosaur attacked!"
"Hey you can't blame me fer yer own bad sense of direction!"
"I'm not! I'm blaming you for lying!"
"Ah jeez! I guess there's only one way to end this."
In a blaze of ki, Ranma's battle aura sprung to life, wreathing his body in blue fire. "I'm gonna have ta hit him hard and fast before he can charge up." Catching Ryouga off guard, the pigtailed martial artist landed a pair of kicks and a pressure point strike, temporarily stunning his opponent. Then he went all out. "Kyaaaah!" For an instant, his battle aura flared to twice its original size, then shrank down to nothing, as the heir to Anything Goes collapsed to his knees, breathing heavily. "I...I... won."
In front of him, the lost boy turned girl collapsed bonelessly to the ground. Akane walked towards him and turned the apparently cursed individual over. Her entire body was covered with blows and burns, each having impacted a vulnerable spot.
"I... I... didn't even see him move."
As one combat ended, the second was just going into extra innings.
"Knave! Stand your ground!"
"Nope! Nyaa! Nyaa!"
Goku leaped all across the battleground like an out of control bouncy ball, the entire time making faces at his opponent. The youth had stuck his tongue out and blown numerous rasberries at the kendo master and he was just getting started.
"Ha ha! Too slow!" Goku grinned cheerily, as he dodged under a bokken strike and then leaped over the next. "Let's go see how Nabiki's doing!"
Abruptly, the middle Tendo sister found herself in the middle of the battlefield, as Goku leaped over to her side. "So whaddya think, Nabiki? Good fight, huh?"
As Kuno charged, Furinkan's ice queen abruptly found herself lifted off her feet. "Let's go have some fun!" That said, Son Goku jumped to the school's roof, carrying his new friend.
Nabiki's brain was just beginning to process the events of the last few seconds. Goku had appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, grabbed her and jumped a full story up to land on the gym's roof. "Son Goku, what are you doing!?!"
"Huh?" the fourteen year old replied, blinking at her naively. "What's wrong Nabiki?"
"What's wrong? What's wrong!?! You just jumped up to the roof with me, you idiot! How the heck am I supposed to get down!?!"
"Oh! Is that it? I thought it was something serious." Taking the much older girl in his arms again, Goku dropped down from the roof, planting his feet firmly on Kuno's head; the kendoist had spent the last minute or so ranting about cowardly demons or some such.
"Is this better, Nabiki?"
Noticing that she was now, literally, at the epicenter of the conflict, the normally most controlled student in Furinkan screamed, "No! Put me on the ground now!"
Finally, Kuno noticed the weight of the two individuals standing on his head. "So you return, monster, to face the wrath of Tatewaki Kuno! Unhand the maiden and get off my head, so that I may smite thee in honorable combat!"
"Um, Nabiki, do you know what he just said?"
"Somehow, I think he wants you to remove your feet from his head, Goku," Nabiki replied dryly. "To be perfectly honest, I wouldn't mind that either!"
Still oblivious to his friend's hostile tone, Goku jumped off Kuno's head, placing Nabiki firmly on the ground. "I guess I'd better finish him now, right?" The older girl nodded. "Okay, then. Time to get serious!" The clueless smile that adorned the Anything Goes fighter's face stole any threat from the pronouncement.
Sprinting into the boy's change room, Goku turned on the showers and regained the bulk of his power. When he returned, the tail was back and his smile had morphed into a confident smirk. Kuno didn't even manage to prepare his defenses before the Saiyajin had penetrated his guard.
"Heeyah!" A potent chop struck the kendoist in the stomach. Gurgling for a moment, the bokken master fell to the ground. However, as Goku began to walk away from his fallen foe, a foreboding voice came from behind him.
"I... fight on."
Stunned that his strike had not ended the battle, the tailed fighter turned to look at his opponent, new respect in his eyes. Then he saw Kuno: the kendoist was still lying on the ground, motionless.
"Huh?"
Nabiki placed a friendly hand on his shoulder. "Oh. Don't worry about Kuno-baby. He has a habit of talking while unconscious."
Goku simply grinned in response, turning to Nabiki. "Wow! School was just as much fun as I thought. Today was great!" He began to amiably stroll towards the school gates.
"You know, Goku, school isn't quite over yet."
-o- -o- -o-
Tatewaki Kuno stood solemnly in the gardens of the Kuno residence.
"Truly, Saotome's dark magics are formidable. His own prowess is not sufficient to equal me, but the creature he's summoned also possesses great power. If both were to attack me at once, I might become slightly pressed." One should note that Kuno's have a notably selective memory. The aforementioned trait is well documented in all members of the family. They have an innate tendency to twist reality to fit their preconceptions and, as every Kuno in the past five centuries has had instilled in him or her, at a young age, the belief in the Kuno family's superiority, this selective memory often causes problems in their determination of the results of lost battles. "Verily, the Hell spawn are a challenge for even one such as myself. I see only one alternative. I must-"
"Brother dear, is there any reason why you're talking to my roses?"
"Silence, my twisted sister! Do not disturb the ruminations of Tatewaki Kuno!"
"OHOHOHOHO! Talking to yourself again, brother dear? Well, I'd best be off then. One insane child is enough for this family!"
She was probably correct, in that the Kuno's did not really need to offspring with a less than firm grip on reality. Unfortunately, two such children had been born.
"Hmph! Now where was I? Ah yes! I have no choice but to seek further training! Sasuke! Come forth!"
From the top of the estate's boundary wall, a short, black figure somersaulted into view. "Master Kuno! I come to serve!"
"Excellent, loyal Sasuke! What I need of you is a teacher of the sword; a man of great prowess!"
"But truly, great lord, none possess greater skill than your own with the blade in all of Japan!"
"You speak truly, Sasuke, but still a teacher I require. I send you, loyal ninja, to find me a master greater than I somewhere, so that I may prepare for my next, great ordeal. Make haste, Sasuke!"
"Yes, lord!"
The diminutive ninja bounded out of Kuno's sight swiftly, hopping across the rooftops. Fortunately, a ronin of great skill, formerly captain of the king of the world's guard, was said to be in Tokyo currently. Known for his great skill, the powerful warrior would prove perfect for Lord Kuno. His name was Yajirobe.
-o- -o- -o-
"Why not, Ranma!?!"
"I don't fight girls, Akane: not even tomboys like you."
Something worth explaining about the Saotome line is that they have a tendency to lead with their mouths, not their brains. The elder Saotome male shows this trait most prominently, but, as one might expect, his son is not immune to Genma's influence. The seppuku contract was the worst of Genma's verbal blunders and, fortunately for Ranma, the pigtailed martial artist was not prone to miscues of that severity. However, the heir to the Saotome school of martial arts still tended to speak more freely than he really should, particularly when around his short-tempered fiancé.
Fortunately for Ranma, on this particular occasion, Akane had a goal which could not be accomplished by knocking her fiancé into lower Earth orbit. Put simply, the youngest Tendo sister had been seriously impressed by Ranma's abilities throughout the day. In fact, she had been so impressed that she was willing to learn from him -- a boy --, if that would allow her to master even some of his skills. Therefore, rather than yelling or punching Ranma, the female Anything Goes student simply gritted her teeth and continued her pleading.
"Please, Ranma! I really want to learn how to do some of that stuff!"
"Jeez! Are you deaf, on top of being uncute and sexless? I said I don't fight girls."
Admittedly, Ranma was pushing the limits of his fiancé's patience. Even the most understanding and caring significant other would be becoming annoyed at the aquatransexual's remarks by this point. Akane, a self-proclaimed boy hater, was not that person. Nonetheless, she wanted to at least spar with the younger Saotome very badly and was willing to give him one more chance before he ended up punted a few miles away.
"Why are you being so sexist, Ranma? Girls can be just as good at martial arts as guys you know!"
"What're you babblin' about? Everyone knows girls ain't good for nothin' 'cept cookin', cleanin' and havin' kids! That's why guys are supposed ta protect them! Man, I bet you couldn't even touch me!"
After Ranma's lecture about 'the way things are,' Akane's patience had finally reached the breaking point. He was acting like a sexist jerk! There was no way she was letting that-that idiot get away with saying things like that! She'd teach him a lesson! She would beat him so hard he'd... Wait. No. She could do even better than that.
Smiling in an extremely predatory fashion, Akane moved so that she could look Ranma in the eye. "Fine, then. Prove it! Unless you're afraid..."
"I ain't afraid o' nothin'!"
"Good! Then we'll just have a little sparring session, but, if I hit you, you'll have to teach me anything I want to know AND you'll have to apologize for being such a sexist jerk!"
Finally, the wheels were starting to spin in Ranma's head. He'd obviously been tricked by the sexless tomboy, but there was no way he was admitting that he'd lost. Ranma Saotome didn't lose! Never! There was no way he was admitting that uncute chick had outsmarted him!
"Deal!" Ranma replied, meeting his fiancé's cocky smirk with his own. "There ain't no way some slow gorilla chick'll hit me! I'll take ya on in the dojo, right now!"
Only a few moments later, the fiancés found themselves facing each other for the second time in as many days in the center of the Tendo Dojo.
"Ready to get stomped, you sexist jerk?"
"Feh! Akane, you don't got a chance 'gainst someone like me!"
Moving into a basic kempo stance, the female martial artist smirked. "Hmph! Better get ready to eat your words, Ranma. I'm coming!"
"No, wait." Ranma held up a single finger, indicating he needed a moment to prepare. "I forgot to get something." Picking up a small magazine at his feet, Ranma opened its pages and began to read. On the magazine's cover was printed the words Real Martial Arts for Real Martial Artists! "Okay, Akane," the pigtailed boy announced, still not looking up from his magazine. "I guess I'm ready now."
Seeing red, the raven haired girl charged furiously. "How dare you not take me seriously, you jerk!?!"
Blazing forward, a faint, crimson aura flaring around her, Akane swung at Ranma... and swung... and swung... and there were a couple of kicks too, but then she swung... and swung; Hopefully, by this point, you get the idea. No matter how swift or powerful her attacks were, though, not one came within six inches of Ranma.
For an hour the two sparred back and forth, or, more accurately, Ranma effortlessly dodged Akane's blows, while reading his magazine. Occasionally, he would comment on blows that were particularly far afield, remarking that they showed just how much of a tomboy she was or explaining that, if she wasn't built like a brick, she might be fast enough to hit him. Eventually, an hour of Akane desperately attempting to strike her fiancé passed.
"So, Akane, ready to admit I was right?" Ranma asked, having picked up a new book since the beginning of their spar; this one was titled The Tortoise and The Hare.
Sweating and breathing heavily, Akane replied, "No... way. I'll never lose to a jerk like you."
Suddenly, a voice boomed from the back of the dojo, "Show some respect for your fiancé, boy!"
At the door of the training room, outlined by the pitch black night sky, stood Genma Saotome. Clad in the purest white, except for a few splotches of mud, Ranma's father cast a look of self-righteous indignation upon his son. "Truly, boy, beating up on defenseless women is very unmanly."
"And, a'course, takin' me ta Jusenkyo made me real manly, right pop?"
"Show some respect for you father, boy: I who have labored so mightily to feed and clothe you, boy. You should be grateful!"
Getting sick of his father's condescending tone, Ranma turned away from Akane, ready to tell his old man what was what. "Whaddya mean labored, pop? You just stole all that stuff! And how 'bout the Nekoken? That one o' those things I should be grateful for, pop?"
Once again, the Saotomes were seriously annoying Akane. Not only had Mr. Saotome called her a helpless little girl, but Ranma -- who had spent the past hour insulting her -- had completely turned his back on her. That arrogant jerk! She'd show him! Gathering as much power as she could, in her exhausted state, Akane sprinted forward for one, final charge. Ranma was going to pay!
"You ain't done nothin' fer me, pop! I'm just lucky you didn't do nothin' real dumb like engage me to a whole buncha girls er somethin'! One sexless tomboy is more than enou-"
Wham!
Akane smashed her fist into her fianc's unguarded back, causing him to momentarily double over. Standing back up, he simply turned and glared. "Whaddya think yer doin', hittin' me like that!?!"
"You deserved it, you jerk! How dare you ignore me like-" Then the reality of what happened finally struck Akane. They'd made a deal, and she'd struck Ranma, which meant that... Akane's smile turned feral.
Like any good member of the male gender, the younger Saotome spotted his fianc's change in expression immediately. "Hey! What's up? Why're ya smilin' like that?"
Changing her expression again into a sugary sweet smile, Akane replied, "Well, Ranma, I just remembered this little deal we made about me managing to hit you."
Now incredibly wary at the radically changing emotions his fiancé displayed, Ranma asked cautiously, "Yeah. What of it?" Then remembering what happened just a moment before and the specifics of said deal, he did the logical, rational thing: the heir to the Saotome school panicked.
"Ah, c'mon Akane! That didn't count! I was... er... distracted! Yeah! That's it: distracted!"
Still smiling in that same sugary sweet way, Akane innocently replied, "Oh my, Ranma! I never thought you would be such a liar! It's so sad. Not only am I engaged to an idiot, but he's a dishonorable, lying idiot."
"Hey! Cut it out, Akane! I ain't no liar! I just-"
A cuff to the head interrupted Ranma. "C'mon, Ranma! Be a man! If you promised your fiancé a smooch for congratulations, then you should keep your word! Your honor as a martial artist depends on it, boy!"
"Shut up, old man!"
Grabbing the arm Genma had encouragingly placed on his shoulder with both hands, Ranma performed a judo throw, sending his oft over ambitious father into the koi pond. Nonetheless, Genma, as always, managed to get in the last word, or at least made an attempt to do so. The man turned panda flashed out a sign, which read, Stop acting like a girl, Ranma! Unfortunately, as a result of the lack of light on moonless nights, neither Ranma nor Akane could even see that Genma had held up a sign. Thus, another wooden sign shot up. Aren't you listening, boy! Once again, Mr. Saotome was thwarted, in his attempt to communicate, by the lack of light outside.
Back inside the dojo, matters were heating up once again.
"I ain't apologizin'! I already said ya cheated!"
"Fine, Ranma! But, if you're going to be such a jerk about keeping promises, you should at least train me!"
"If I do train ya, will ya shut up about it?"
"Yes, but you'd better not lie this time."
Slumping his shoulders, Ranma finally agreed. "Fine, ya tomboy! I'll do it."
Instantly brightening, Akane smiled warmly at Ranma. "Thanks, Ranma." For an instant, the younger Saotome was tempted to almost call the smile cute. Then the moment passed, as Akane huffed and walked off, tossing a warning over her shoulder: "You'd better be serious about this, Ranma."
Ranma scolded himself. "Cute? Man, that hit musta unscrewed my brain or somethin'. There's no way I'd ever go for some uncute, built like a brick tomboy like Akane."
"I heard that Ranma!"
"Ah man!"
-o- -o- -o-
The next few days at Furinkan occurred without incident. Ryouga woke up a few hours after his defeat, went to avenge his loss, and promptly became lost. Tatewaki Kuno had not appeared on campus since his loss either. There were the expected rumors that he was training for vengeance; Ranma ignored these whispered warnings. Even with a few months worth of training, the kendoist couldn't beat him.
Unfortunately, Akane and Ranma's relationship benefited little from the lack of interruptions. A combination of stubbornness and annoyance with their engagement kept the two Anything Goes heirs warring with one another. Admittedly, the rumors that Akane's sudden marriage was the result of an unexpected pregnancy didn't help matters, and neither did Furinkan's continually attacking, male horde, but the couple's own interpersonal difficulties were the root cause of their animosity.
In contrast, Nabiki and Goku's friendship was blooming at a remarkable rate. Having an elite martial artist who worked for free in her employ was a boon for the middle Tendo sister and, in Nabiki, Son Goku had discovered a sort of mother/older sister figure he'd always desired. The tailed teen had found a father in Genma and brothers in both Ranma and Ryouga, replacing the grandfather he had lost, but there were no female influences in his young life. Goku was finding that he really liked having Nabiki in his life.
The youngest student of Anything Goes martial arts wandered through the main floor of the Tendo home. Yawning, Goku wandered towards the refrigerator, looking for a late night snack.
Slowly opening the refrigerator door, the young Saiyajin caught sight of the food inside and his mouth watered. Piles of rice and fresh fish stocked every shelf; for Goku, this was heaven. Piling half the refrigerator's contents on a large plate, the martial artist placed the small feast on the table and grinned. Out of nowhere, the Saiyajin youth pulled a quartet of chop sticks, wielding two in each hand, in preparation for the one part of the Saotome school's art neither Ranma nor Genma had ever defeated him in.
"Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts Food Fighting ultimate technique! Strike of the Starving Elephant!"
In a blur of motion, Goku's chopsticks shot foodstuffs into his mouth. Less than two seconds later, the Saiyajin's assault on the fish and rice ended, however, the plate cleared. The teenager's mouth was brimming with various foods. Then, with a giant gulp, nearly ten pounds of assorted food was swallowed.
Patting his stomach contentedly, the boy grinned. "Wow! That really hit the spot!"
"An impressive show, boy! But are you ready for a real test!"
Goku spun around to face his surrogate father. He'd never figure out how someone so big could move so quietly. "Huh? What test?"
Taking a monolithic pose, Genma stood solemnly. "It's a mission only a true martial artist could manage, boy! Even Ranma couldn't possibly do this!"
The last remaining Son was becoming intrigued. Ranma was a really good martial artist: even better than he was at martial arts. For Mr. Saotome to entrust him with such a difficult mission was a true show of the Anything Goes master's confidence in him. Goku wouldn't let him down!
"So harrowing is this test boy, that I would not even dare go with you! Are you up to the challenge, Goku?"
"Yeah!"
"Alright then!" Mr. Saotome placed his arms behind his back, adopting a contemplative pose. "A famous master of the art, Tsuru'sennin, has recently entered Nerima with his pupils. It is rumored that he carries with him a scroll for the bukujutsu, a technique that will allow one to fly. I need you to get it for me, Goku! You're the only one who can do it!"
Looking confused, Goku scratched the back of his head nervously. "But isn't that stealing? Ranma always said that stealing was pretty bad."
Sweating nervously, Genma replied, "Er... no, Goku. It's only stealing if you don't have permission to take something, but I'm giving you permission, so it's okay!"
"Oh! I guess that makes sense."
Grinning, Goku waved good bye and sprinted out the Tendo's front door. Mr. Saotome would be so proud of him! It was so great that he could help the closest thing he'd ever had to a father like this!
From the inside the Tendo homestead, Genma Saotome smirked triumphantly. He was a little bit annoyed with Ranma for filling the boy's head with wimpy rubbish about not stealing, but there was still time to fix his heir's way of thinking. Goku was great for appropriating techniques from other martial artists. That ability was a boon for the Saotome school. Anything Goes had always thrived on the adaptation to and incorporation of other martial arts. Since, he'd discovered Goku, his half of the school had grown to the point where he could likely rival even the master. If the air dance could be added to his repertoire, as well, none would be able to challenge him. Finally, the Saotomes would be masters of the air.
-o- -o- -o-
Ranma awoke with a splash.
"Come on, boy! A true martial artist should be ready at all times!"
Leaping down from his window, Genma joined his son in the Tendo yard. Looking serious, the elder Saotome moved into a stance with both arms extended like a bird's wings. The posture assisted with balance and was ideal for launching in the air: the true testing ground for any of the Saotome school's students.
"Oh, how it pains me to see my son acting so weak and girlish!"
By this point, Ranma was becoming seriously annoyed. Throwing him into the pond was one thing and patronizing was also not on Ranma's list of favorite things his father did, but insulting his manhood was going too far.
"Shut up, ya old fart!"
A burst of energy marked the explosion of a blazing blue battle aura around Ranma. Then, effortlessly vaulting forty feet into the air, Ranma torqued his body downwards. Combining gravity with the techniques of his chosen art, Ranma fired at his father.
Showing the skills that had made him the master, Genma dodged with a back flip, striking his son with a pair of kicks in the process. "You're getting slow, boy!" Reversing his momentum, as he touched the ground, Mr. Saotome shot forward, opening up with a blitz of ki charged punches.
Finding himself abruptly on the defensive, Ranma began to lose ground, gradually being herded towards the pond. The old man had always been a couple of steps ahead of him and seemed to have a bottomless well of techniques, but the pigtailed martial artist was closing the gap between the two of them. For the past year, he had been gaining ground. Between his fights with Ryouga, Goku and his father, he'd improved to the point where he was almost Genma's equal. Unfortunately, there is a large gap between being something and almost being something.
"C'mon, pops! I could take this all day!" Ranma affirmed, smirking cockily in his father's direction, as he barely dodged the continuous barrage of blows directed his way.
"Hmph," Genma replied in annoyance at the fact that he had yet to connect. "If that's true, then why have you left AN OPENING!"
The elder martial artist right foot snaked forward in a trip, knocking Ranma into the pond for a second time that morning. He laughed. "Ha ha, boy! That'll teach you to disrespect your elders!"
A female voice rose up from the pond, accompanied by a powerful splash of water. "Sorry, but I just ain't never respected a panda."
Genma, drenched and in panda form, after Ranma's splash, grimaced, holding up one of his seemingly infinite supply of signs. That was a cheap shot, boy.
Before the two cursed individuals could begin a pseudo verbal spar, a cheery voice rang out from the kitchen of the Tendo home. "Ranma, Mr. Saotome, breakfast is ready!"
Boy, I'll teach you a lesson later. For now, there are more important things to do.
Ranma disagreed with his father's sentiments. "Feh! You just wanna feed your fat stomach!" Then again, his sprint after his father was no slower for his disdain.
As usual, the first thing that greeted Ranma upon arrival to the kitchen was Kasumi's warm smile. "Oh my, Ranma! You're all wet. Don't worry. The kettle will be boiled in just a few minutes."
"Thanks, Kasumi. Being a girl really sucks!"
"What do you mean by that, Ranma?" Akane intoned icily from across the table. "I don't see what's so terrible about being a girl."
Ranma shrugged easily, ignoring the warning in Akane's tone. "Ah c'mon! I suppose girls ain't bad fer cookin' or cleanin', but they're too weak to take on a real man."
That spark lit a fire in the part of Akane that hated the constant discrimination against women in Japanese society. She yelled a scathing reply, Ranma responded in kind, and the petty bickering was on.
Ignoring the arguing fianc's, Soun turned to his old friend in congratulations. "You've really improved, Saotome. You've done a splendid job with your heir, but I think you're much stronger than before the trip as well. I must commend you, Saotome."
Normally, Genma would have replied with a boastful speech about his abilities. Pandas aren't to skilled at speaking, however, so he just held up a sign instead. Darn right, Tendo! The boy and Goku really kept me on my feet!
Nabiki preferred, unlike her family, to eat silently, and would normally use breakfast to plan her day. However, today, a more pressing consideration occupied her mind.
"Where's Goku?"
Conversation at the breakfast table stopped instantly. Looking around the room, both the Tendos and Saotomes confirmed that, in fact, Goku had not arrived for a meal: a seeming impossibility.
Ever since Goku had arrived at the dojo, two characteristics of his had become readily apparent. The tailed youth was a fantastic martial artist and had an absolutely insatiable hunger. For him to decide to skip breakfast was analogous to the sun deciding it needed a vacation or the king of the world ordering that they act freely; the boy missing breakfast couldn't possibly be of his own volition.
Ranma shot out of his chair, visibly worried. "What the heck? There ain't no way Goku'd miss a meal! What could've happened to the little guy?"
Almost as if in answer to Ranma query, a dart shot through the Tendo family's window, impacting against the center of the family's kitchen table. Attached to the black, purple-striped dart was a note.
Quickly grabbing the piece of paper and taking a glance, Mr. Tendo burst into tears. "Oh no! They've taken my dearest son! What a tragedy! What a-"
"Hey! Wait a sec, Mr. Tendo!" The older man ceased his bawling momentarily. "Since when do you have a son !?!"
For a few seconds, the Tendo patriarch mulled over his future son-in-law's statement. "An excellent point, Ranma. I don't have a son. But then what could this note possible mean?"
Ranma snatched the piece of paper, this time reading the words elaborately written on it aloud. "Dear Mr. Tendo, We have your son. If you don't come to claim him at the gates of Furinkan High School by dawn today, your son will die in a most painful manner." The note was left unsigned.
Nabiki grimaced. "I'd give good odds that they've mistaken Goku for your son, dad. We'd better go save him."
As the entirety of the Tendo household, save only Kasumi, sprinted towards the high school (Nabiki carried in her father's arms to allow for greater speed), something weird about that note finally struck Ranma. Admittedly, he or someone else may have come to the conclusion earlier, but they were in a rather stressful situation. In fact, the sun in his eyes was what ultimately clued him in.
"What the heck !?! The sun was up before we even got that note! Whadda they mean he'll die if we don't show up before dawn !?!"
-o- -o- -o-
"Ugh! I'm so hungry! I haven't eaten for hours! I'm gonna die if you don't feed me soon!" Son Goku moaned pitifully. Bound with steel chains to a massive pike his captors had placed between the school gates, the Saiyajin was incredibly hungry. Admittedly, he could likely last another month or so, but his stomach was writhing in agony.
"Good! Make sure you die quickly, as well. You said you would be dead almost three hours ago!"
"Must... have breakfast... or else... I'll die."
"Excellent! Get on with it then! If I'd known you would take this long to die, I would have set the date of our revenge for tomorrow. One simply cannot have a proper battle without one fallen comrade to avenge on one side or the other!"
Glancing away from his captive for a few seconds, Tsuru'sennin -- the ancient Crane master -- gazed gleefully at his disciples. "Tien, Choutzu, are you both prepared?" The students of the Crane school nodded solemnly. "Excellent! Any moment now, the Tendos will be arriving. We will have our revenge on the Anything Goes school for trying to steal our most sacred technique!"
A quartet of figures in martial arts attire became visible in the distance. Foremost, a young boy and an older man were hopping along rooftops at a dazzling pace. Just behind them, another older man, this one clad in samurai armor approached, carrying a teen aged girl. Finally, a dark-haired girl, wearing a yellow gi was running through the streets at top speed. "Heh heh! It appears that the Tendos have arrived."
Ranma was the first to reach the trio clothed in blue gis bearing the Crane school's insignia. "Give us back our friend!" he yelled, glaring at the older man who seemed to be the leader.
"Don't you mean... your brother: Goku Tendo!" The Crane master cackled evilly.
"Um... no," Ranma replied, looking confused. "What makes you think me and Goku are Tendos? We're just staying at their dojo for a while."
"What !?! That ruins all the drama! What sort of epic conflict is over a friend !?! Lovers and brothers are one thing, but friends!" The ancient martial arts master scowled. "I suppose friends will have to do!"
By this time, the entirety of the party of Tendos and Saotomes had arrived. The four martial artists faced Tsuru'sennin, prepared for anything, while Nabiki moved away from the battle at a brisk walk. There was no way she could assist her companions in a fight, but, if she could get Goku free, there was no way her family could lose.
"Tien, Choutzu: I will defeat this impudent fool of a boy. Split the remainder of the wretches amongst yourselves." Then, defying Ranma's ability to dodge, Tsuru'sennin struck with a knifelike blow to the head.
The blow would have slain lesser mortals in a blow; Ranma was not a lesser mortal. Nonetheless, the attack sent him careening into and through the school gate. He stood groggily, attempting to regain his equilibrium, but Tsuru'sennin was already upon him. "Not dead? You're stronger than I anticipated, but it will not be enough!"
As hammer and knife blows assaulted Ranma, the Anything Goes fighter was unable to get his bearings. "I've gotta go to the air," he thought, twisting out of the way of yet another strike. Bending his knees, in the moment of respite the dodge gave him, the younger Saotome leapt fifty feet into the air, using the techniques of his school to maximize air resistance. "Good. Now that I'm up here there's no way that jerk can take me."
"Is that so?" a voice asked from above him.
"What? How did you-" Ranma's second query was effectively cut off by a, literally, flying kick to his gut. As he crashed into the ground, the pigtailed martial artist's mind spun. That man had been flying. Not hovering by increasing air resistance, but actually flying. There was no way he could match the old master in the air or on the ground. This was going to get rough.
-o- -o- -o-
As Akane saw the apparent leader of Goku's kidnappers smash Ranma through a wall, she quickly moved to intercede. If the old man had beaten Ranma that easily, there was no way she could defeat him, but maybe she could buy Ranma the time he needed to recover. The youngest Tendo daughter leaped in between the Crane master and his target, or at least tried to do so.
"What the heck?" She couldn't move. Not just her legs, but her entire body was frozen in place. Then she noticed the chalk white-skinned figure hovering above her position, a finger pointed in her direction. He was smirking.
"Nothing can escape my ultimate technique. Now watch what I can do with you." He gestured with his forefinger and Akane flew into one of the school's concrete walls in a bone jarring impact. "You can't win. Nyaah! Nyaah!" The doll-like figure stuck out his tongue at Akane, as the mockery continued.
Seeing his daughter's distress, Soun ran towards her. "Akane!" Unfortunately, the master of the Tendo school was so focused on Akane's predicament that he entirely missed the ki beam that impacted with his back, plowing him through a brick wall and into unconsciousness.
"What a fool," scoffed Tien." He couldn't even keep his mind on his opponents.
Out of nowhere, a wooden sign impacted with his skull, knocking the three-eyed for a loop. "What the heck was that !?!" he yelled picking up the scrap of wood. There were words printed on the sign; he read them. Inattention is a fault which you seem to suffer from as well, boy. After all, you didn't even dodge the punch!
"That wasn't a punch! It was a cheap shot!"
"That's right, boy!" a solemn voice came from behind the triclops. "This is the punch."
A massive uppercut sent Tien flying back twenty feet before he could reorient himself with the bukujitsu technique. "Whoever you are, you're not going to beat the heir Tsuru'sennin's heir!" The three-eyed martial artist leaped to the air and put a hand to his forehead. "Rapid fire Dodonpa!"
A veritable array of ki beams lanced the ground, forcing Tien's opponent to finally reveal himself. From behind a tree, Genma leaped across the school yard, temporarily out of Tien's range. The white gi wearing martial arts master needed a plan. Between his enemy's ability to fly and the ki beams, his defense was practically invulnerable. If Genma stopped long enough to charge his own blast in return, he'd be struck; the same thing would happen if he leapt into the air. For now, he would have to dodge and hope the boy ran out of ki before he made a lucky shot.
-o- -o- -o-
Unbeknownst to the combatants, three other variables had just entered the Furinkan school yard. One, Nabiki Tendo, was considering scaling the pike, in order to free Goku. Normally, she wouldn't even consider trying something like her current plan to save her the kid. Even for someone in good shape, like her, climbing straight up a twenty-five foot tall pole was nigh on impossible. She walked up to the pike and placed a hand on the smooth wood, as if to begin, and halted.
"Come on, Nabiki," she thought to herself. "This plan is ridiculous and won't work. It's the sort of thing Goku would come up with and didn't you swear not to ever try anything the crazy midget suggested. There has to be another way; just think!"
Then the answer came to her in the form of a slowly emerging figure, clad in a kendo uniform, wielding a bokken at his side. "Nabiki Tendo! Where is my tigress, Akane Tendo? I will pay you handsomely for the information!"
Regretting the fact that she was about to pass up easy money, Nabiki forced a predatory smile. "Now, now, Kuno-baby, I couldn't possibly take money from you. There's just a little something I need done."
"Ask and I shall do anything for knowledge of my tigress, Nabiki!"
Her smile widened just slightly. Kuno was so easy to manipulate. "Oh, it's nothing serious! I just think this pole they put in the middle of the gates is a bit unseemly. Couldn't you cut it down, Kuno-baby?"
"Truly, t'is a boorish ornament. I agree to your terms, Nabiki Tendo!" Without another word, the Blue Thunder bared his bokken and smote down the pike, knocking Goku to the ground. "Ah! As I anticipated, the monstrous cretin Son Goku was responsible for this-"
Nabiki had to think fast before Kuno took out a helpless, hungry and exhausted Goku. "Look Kuno, a... er... ghoul has assaulted my sister!"
"What? Who dares attack my tigress?" The kendoist's eyes turned towards Akane, who continued to be beaten against the walls of Furinkan telekinetically. "Do not think your time has passed, Son Goku. I shall smite thee in just a few minutes!" Kuno sprinted in his love's direction. After almost a weak training in an advanced variation on kendo, none would stand in the way of his quest for Akane Tendo's heart.
Nabiki, ran in the opposite direction: towards Goku. "You'd better appreciate this, kiddo. I could have scammed Kuno for a lot of money just now." Taking out a lock pick she'd had crafted for just such an occasion, the most mercenary of the Tendos began working at the steel chains' lock. The lock wasn't exactly top grade, so she could probably unlock it in a few minutes tops. Then the jerks who'd stolen her best assistant would learn what happened when you messed with Nabiki Tendo.
Tatewaki Kuno and Nabiki made two variables, but a third unexpected arrival had just entered the Furinkan High property, as well.
"Curse you, Ranma! How dare you cheat like that Ranma !?!" The bandanna wearing warrior thought he heard Saotome's scream. "Darn you, Ranma! Now I'm even hearing your voice in my-" A second scream, this time closer, cut short Ryouga's monologue.
"Huh? Where's that voice coming from?" The lost boy looked up, down, but never even considered the wall beside him, until Ranma Saotome came crashing through the concrete fence, landing on top of him.
"Damn you Ranma! How dare you land on me !?!"
The pig-tailed boy looked momentarily surprised and then grinned. "Man, Ryouga! Am I ever glad to see-"
A rather violent and powerful punch knocked Ranma through yet another wall, effectively cutting him off. "Heh heh! For all the hell you've put me through Ranma, prepare to-"
As seemed to be becoming a pattern, Ryouga was cut off, as a Dodonpa struck him, hurling the umbrella wielding martial artist back a half dozen feet. "What the heck !?!" The occasional student of Anything Goes looked upwards and cursed. Some old geezer was floating in the air and shooting those thin little beams all over the place. Worse yet, the scum bag had hit him: him, Ryouga Hibiki. No one blasts Ryouga Hibiki and gets away with it.
Hurling his umbrella at the master of the Crane school, as if the bamboo construct was boomerang, the eternally lost boy smirked sadistically as his weapon began spinning like a buzz saw. "Die!"
Getting up from his fourth crash through a wall that day, Ranma looked at his longtime rival and smirked. "Changed yer mind 'bout helpin' me out, Ryouga?"
"Don't think this makes us friends, or anything, Ranma. I'm only helping you because that old man really pissed me off."
"Oh yah! Well it ain't like I like workin' with a wimp like you, but these guys wanna hurt Goku. I ain't lettin' them do it!"
Ranma's words seemed to sober Ryouga, stopping his rage from exploding at Ranma's insults. "They hurt Goku?"
"Yep. The old guy even said he wanted to kill the little guy."
Ryouga's expression seemed to darken, as his eyes narrowed to slits. Besides his parents, Ryouga had few things he truly valued in the world. There was his life, his dog and one friend: the only friend he had ever made. That friend's name was Son Goku. No one threatened Ryouga Hibiki's friends and survived.
"He's dead!"
Ignoring the blasts of chi energy raining all over the streets, Ryouga leapt straight towards his assailant. If all went well, he'd reach the old geezer at about the same time as his umbrella and then there was going to be pain for the man who had dared threaten his friend: a lot of pain.
End Chapter Three
Author Notes: That was a fun chapter to write, though the fight scene was a little darker than I originally intended. Oh well. I guess Tien and Choutzu just aren't very lighthearted characters. Next chapter the fight comes to an exciting conclusion and things lighten up again; the violence won't last for too long. I suppose I should also thank all those who have and continue to review. I received one suggestion I liked and am incorporating into the story. Ah yes! For those who want to know if Goku and Nabiki are being paired together, I don't know why I would ever tell you who is going to end up together. That would ruin all the wonderful suspense. Thanks again for the reviews and see you at my next update.
Never explain -- your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway.
Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
Chapter Three
"Die Saotome!" Ryouga cried, unleashing a storm of bandannas, as he charged.
"Feel the wrath of the Blue Thunder, demon!" Kuno shouted, sprinting towards Goku.
"Ranma, what sort of perverted thing did you do to her!?!" Akane screamed, wielding one of the gym's hockey sticks like a scythe.
In the center of the courtyard, Ranma and Goku stood back to back, preparing to face their opponents. Each stood in an identical stance, but their expressions were radically different.
"Wow! This is going to be great!" the younger fighter enthused.
Ranma, unlike his companion, knew exactly how much trouble the two of them were in. Ryouga, Kuno and Akane were out for blood and Goku was in cursed form. Victory would require a miracle. Slowly, Saotome's expression morphed to a smirk. Miracles were Ranma's stock in trade.
Leaping over the spinning bandannas, Ranma decided to meet his opponent in the middle. A blurred umbrella strike blazed towards the pigtailed martial artist's stomach. He spun out of the attacks path, replying with a verbal riposte: "C'mon Ryouga! What sorta man are ya doin' girly attacks like that?"
"Damn you, Saotome!" Grabbing another of his seemingly limitless supply of bandannas, the fanged martial artist tried for a repeat of the trick he'd pulled at Jusenkyo, attempting to wrap one of his bandannas around his long time rival's wrist.
"Feh! You think I'll fall for that again!" Moving at speeds exceeding normal human vision, Ranma's leg shot forward in a kick, knocking the weapon from Ryouga's hand. Then, the pigtailed fighter back flipped out of range of any counters his opponent might attempt. "Jeez, Ryouga! Whaddya been doin' the past week? A parked car coulda dodged that!"
That was when Akane finally entered the fray. "Take this, you pervert!" The hockey stick descended towards his head. Once again, Ranma dodged effortlessly.
"Get outta here, Akane! This is a man to man fight!"
From the crowd, Hiroshi remarked, "Again with the gender confusion. How sad, in such beautiful girls."
"What do you mean man to man!?! She's a girl!"
"No, you idiot! He's cursed, just like me!"
Akane's eyes widened momentarily. "What you mean he's really a-"
"I am nothing like you, Saotome!"
Before he could prepare his defenses, a massive uppercut plowed into him, sending him flying back a dozen feet. Ryouga followed. "I'm going to destroy your happiness! Now you see the fruits of my training! Eight Hands Attack!"
Ryouga's arms blurred to the point that, by all appearances he had four times his original complement of arms. Then, a seemingly infinite barrage of blows began to rain down upon Ranma. Barely capable of dodging, the heir to Anything Goes was being pushed to his limits by his Hibiki's new technique. "Darn it! This has got to have some sort of weakness! Wait! All he's doing is pulling off one of the illusion things pop likes to use. So all I've got to do is focus and..."
Ranma's arms shot forward, grabbing the only two real limbs. "Nice try, Ryouga, but there's no way some wimpy technique like that's gonna stop me!"
"Wimpy! How dare you!?! For that, Ranma, I'll kill you!"
"Nope! Ya already said yer killin' me fer a buncha other stuff! So, what's yer problem, anyway?"
"How dare you pretend you don't know!?! Lying to me about how to swim to Japan, you scum!"
Ranma blinked owlishly for a moment and then remembered to whom he was talking. "Um, Ryouga. I told you to swim straight across the sea to the big island."
"I know! Those cursed lies had me swimming all the way around the world!"
"Whaddya mean? How could you miss Japan? It's huge!" Exactly, but you didn't tell me which island, so I ended up swimming for days, and then the dinosaur attacked!"
"Hey you can't blame me fer yer own bad sense of direction!"
"I'm not! I'm blaming you for lying!"
"Ah jeez! I guess there's only one way to end this."
In a blaze of ki, Ranma's battle aura sprung to life, wreathing his body in blue fire. "I'm gonna have ta hit him hard and fast before he can charge up." Catching Ryouga off guard, the pigtailed martial artist landed a pair of kicks and a pressure point strike, temporarily stunning his opponent. Then he went all out. "Kyaaaah!" For an instant, his battle aura flared to twice its original size, then shrank down to nothing, as the heir to Anything Goes collapsed to his knees, breathing heavily. "I...I... won."
In front of him, the lost boy turned girl collapsed bonelessly to the ground. Akane walked towards him and turned the apparently cursed individual over. Her entire body was covered with blows and burns, each having impacted a vulnerable spot.
"I... I... didn't even see him move."
As one combat ended, the second was just going into extra innings.
"Knave! Stand your ground!"
"Nope! Nyaa! Nyaa!"
Goku leaped all across the battleground like an out of control bouncy ball, the entire time making faces at his opponent. The youth had stuck his tongue out and blown numerous rasberries at the kendo master and he was just getting started.
"Ha ha! Too slow!" Goku grinned cheerily, as he dodged under a bokken strike and then leaped over the next. "Let's go see how Nabiki's doing!"
Abruptly, the middle Tendo sister found herself in the middle of the battlefield, as Goku leaped over to her side. "So whaddya think, Nabiki? Good fight, huh?"
As Kuno charged, Furinkan's ice queen abruptly found herself lifted off her feet. "Let's go have some fun!" That said, Son Goku jumped to the school's roof, carrying his new friend.
Nabiki's brain was just beginning to process the events of the last few seconds. Goku had appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, grabbed her and jumped a full story up to land on the gym's roof. "Son Goku, what are you doing!?!"
"Huh?" the fourteen year old replied, blinking at her naively. "What's wrong Nabiki?"
"What's wrong? What's wrong!?! You just jumped up to the roof with me, you idiot! How the heck am I supposed to get down!?!"
"Oh! Is that it? I thought it was something serious." Taking the much older girl in his arms again, Goku dropped down from the roof, planting his feet firmly on Kuno's head; the kendoist had spent the last minute or so ranting about cowardly demons or some such.
"Is this better, Nabiki?"
Noticing that she was now, literally, at the epicenter of the conflict, the normally most controlled student in Furinkan screamed, "No! Put me on the ground now!"
Finally, Kuno noticed the weight of the two individuals standing on his head. "So you return, monster, to face the wrath of Tatewaki Kuno! Unhand the maiden and get off my head, so that I may smite thee in honorable combat!"
"Um, Nabiki, do you know what he just said?"
"Somehow, I think he wants you to remove your feet from his head, Goku," Nabiki replied dryly. "To be perfectly honest, I wouldn't mind that either!"
Still oblivious to his friend's hostile tone, Goku jumped off Kuno's head, placing Nabiki firmly on the ground. "I guess I'd better finish him now, right?" The older girl nodded. "Okay, then. Time to get serious!" The clueless smile that adorned the Anything Goes fighter's face stole any threat from the pronouncement.
Sprinting into the boy's change room, Goku turned on the showers and regained the bulk of his power. When he returned, the tail was back and his smile had morphed into a confident smirk. Kuno didn't even manage to prepare his defenses before the Saiyajin had penetrated his guard.
"Heeyah!" A potent chop struck the kendoist in the stomach. Gurgling for a moment, the bokken master fell to the ground. However, as Goku began to walk away from his fallen foe, a foreboding voice came from behind him.
"I... fight on."
Stunned that his strike had not ended the battle, the tailed fighter turned to look at his opponent, new respect in his eyes. Then he saw Kuno: the kendoist was still lying on the ground, motionless.
"Huh?"
Nabiki placed a friendly hand on his shoulder. "Oh. Don't worry about Kuno-baby. He has a habit of talking while unconscious."
Goku simply grinned in response, turning to Nabiki. "Wow! School was just as much fun as I thought. Today was great!" He began to amiably stroll towards the school gates.
"You know, Goku, school isn't quite over yet."
-o- -o- -o-
Tatewaki Kuno stood solemnly in the gardens of the Kuno residence.
"Truly, Saotome's dark magics are formidable. His own prowess is not sufficient to equal me, but the creature he's summoned also possesses great power. If both were to attack me at once, I might become slightly pressed." One should note that Kuno's have a notably selective memory. The aforementioned trait is well documented in all members of the family. They have an innate tendency to twist reality to fit their preconceptions and, as every Kuno in the past five centuries has had instilled in him or her, at a young age, the belief in the Kuno family's superiority, this selective memory often causes problems in their determination of the results of lost battles. "Verily, the Hell spawn are a challenge for even one such as myself. I see only one alternative. I must-"
"Brother dear, is there any reason why you're talking to my roses?"
"Silence, my twisted sister! Do not disturb the ruminations of Tatewaki Kuno!"
"OHOHOHOHO! Talking to yourself again, brother dear? Well, I'd best be off then. One insane child is enough for this family!"
She was probably correct, in that the Kuno's did not really need to offspring with a less than firm grip on reality. Unfortunately, two such children had been born.
"Hmph! Now where was I? Ah yes! I have no choice but to seek further training! Sasuke! Come forth!"
From the top of the estate's boundary wall, a short, black figure somersaulted into view. "Master Kuno! I come to serve!"
"Excellent, loyal Sasuke! What I need of you is a teacher of the sword; a man of great prowess!"
"But truly, great lord, none possess greater skill than your own with the blade in all of Japan!"
"You speak truly, Sasuke, but still a teacher I require. I send you, loyal ninja, to find me a master greater than I somewhere, so that I may prepare for my next, great ordeal. Make haste, Sasuke!"
"Yes, lord!"
The diminutive ninja bounded out of Kuno's sight swiftly, hopping across the rooftops. Fortunately, a ronin of great skill, formerly captain of the king of the world's guard, was said to be in Tokyo currently. Known for his great skill, the powerful warrior would prove perfect for Lord Kuno. His name was Yajirobe.
-o- -o- -o-
"Why not, Ranma!?!"
"I don't fight girls, Akane: not even tomboys like you."
Something worth explaining about the Saotome line is that they have a tendency to lead with their mouths, not their brains. The elder Saotome male shows this trait most prominently, but, as one might expect, his son is not immune to Genma's influence. The seppuku contract was the worst of Genma's verbal blunders and, fortunately for Ranma, the pigtailed martial artist was not prone to miscues of that severity. However, the heir to the Saotome school of martial arts still tended to speak more freely than he really should, particularly when around his short-tempered fiancé.
Fortunately for Ranma, on this particular occasion, Akane had a goal which could not be accomplished by knocking her fiancé into lower Earth orbit. Put simply, the youngest Tendo sister had been seriously impressed by Ranma's abilities throughout the day. In fact, she had been so impressed that she was willing to learn from him -- a boy --, if that would allow her to master even some of his skills. Therefore, rather than yelling or punching Ranma, the female Anything Goes student simply gritted her teeth and continued her pleading.
"Please, Ranma! I really want to learn how to do some of that stuff!"
"Jeez! Are you deaf, on top of being uncute and sexless? I said I don't fight girls."
Admittedly, Ranma was pushing the limits of his fiancé's patience. Even the most understanding and caring significant other would be becoming annoyed at the aquatransexual's remarks by this point. Akane, a self-proclaimed boy hater, was not that person. Nonetheless, she wanted to at least spar with the younger Saotome very badly and was willing to give him one more chance before he ended up punted a few miles away.
"Why are you being so sexist, Ranma? Girls can be just as good at martial arts as guys you know!"
"What're you babblin' about? Everyone knows girls ain't good for nothin' 'cept cookin', cleanin' and havin' kids! That's why guys are supposed ta protect them! Man, I bet you couldn't even touch me!"
After Ranma's lecture about 'the way things are,' Akane's patience had finally reached the breaking point. He was acting like a sexist jerk! There was no way she was letting that-that idiot get away with saying things like that! She'd teach him a lesson! She would beat him so hard he'd... Wait. No. She could do even better than that.
Smiling in an extremely predatory fashion, Akane moved so that she could look Ranma in the eye. "Fine, then. Prove it! Unless you're afraid..."
"I ain't afraid o' nothin'!"
"Good! Then we'll just have a little sparring session, but, if I hit you, you'll have to teach me anything I want to know AND you'll have to apologize for being such a sexist jerk!"
Finally, the wheels were starting to spin in Ranma's head. He'd obviously been tricked by the sexless tomboy, but there was no way he was admitting that he'd lost. Ranma Saotome didn't lose! Never! There was no way he was admitting that uncute chick had outsmarted him!
"Deal!" Ranma replied, meeting his fiancé's cocky smirk with his own. "There ain't no way some slow gorilla chick'll hit me! I'll take ya on in the dojo, right now!"
Only a few moments later, the fiancés found themselves facing each other for the second time in as many days in the center of the Tendo Dojo.
"Ready to get stomped, you sexist jerk?"
"Feh! Akane, you don't got a chance 'gainst someone like me!"
Moving into a basic kempo stance, the female martial artist smirked. "Hmph! Better get ready to eat your words, Ranma. I'm coming!"
"No, wait." Ranma held up a single finger, indicating he needed a moment to prepare. "I forgot to get something." Picking up a small magazine at his feet, Ranma opened its pages and began to read. On the magazine's cover was printed the words Real Martial Arts for Real Martial Artists! "Okay, Akane," the pigtailed boy announced, still not looking up from his magazine. "I guess I'm ready now."
Seeing red, the raven haired girl charged furiously. "How dare you not take me seriously, you jerk!?!"
Blazing forward, a faint, crimson aura flaring around her, Akane swung at Ranma... and swung... and swung... and there were a couple of kicks too, but then she swung... and swung; Hopefully, by this point, you get the idea. No matter how swift or powerful her attacks were, though, not one came within six inches of Ranma.
For an hour the two sparred back and forth, or, more accurately, Ranma effortlessly dodged Akane's blows, while reading his magazine. Occasionally, he would comment on blows that were particularly far afield, remarking that they showed just how much of a tomboy she was or explaining that, if she wasn't built like a brick, she might be fast enough to hit him. Eventually, an hour of Akane desperately attempting to strike her fiancé passed.
"So, Akane, ready to admit I was right?" Ranma asked, having picked up a new book since the beginning of their spar; this one was titled The Tortoise and The Hare.
Sweating and breathing heavily, Akane replied, "No... way. I'll never lose to a jerk like you."
Suddenly, a voice boomed from the back of the dojo, "Show some respect for your fiancé, boy!"
At the door of the training room, outlined by the pitch black night sky, stood Genma Saotome. Clad in the purest white, except for a few splotches of mud, Ranma's father cast a look of self-righteous indignation upon his son. "Truly, boy, beating up on defenseless women is very unmanly."
"And, a'course, takin' me ta Jusenkyo made me real manly, right pop?"
"Show some respect for you father, boy: I who have labored so mightily to feed and clothe you, boy. You should be grateful!"
Getting sick of his father's condescending tone, Ranma turned away from Akane, ready to tell his old man what was what. "Whaddya mean labored, pop? You just stole all that stuff! And how 'bout the Nekoken? That one o' those things I should be grateful for, pop?"
Once again, the Saotomes were seriously annoying Akane. Not only had Mr. Saotome called her a helpless little girl, but Ranma -- who had spent the past hour insulting her -- had completely turned his back on her. That arrogant jerk! She'd show him! Gathering as much power as she could, in her exhausted state, Akane sprinted forward for one, final charge. Ranma was going to pay!
"You ain't done nothin' fer me, pop! I'm just lucky you didn't do nothin' real dumb like engage me to a whole buncha girls er somethin'! One sexless tomboy is more than enou-"
Wham!
Akane smashed her fist into her fianc's unguarded back, causing him to momentarily double over. Standing back up, he simply turned and glared. "Whaddya think yer doin', hittin' me like that!?!"
"You deserved it, you jerk! How dare you ignore me like-" Then the reality of what happened finally struck Akane. They'd made a deal, and she'd struck Ranma, which meant that... Akane's smile turned feral.
Like any good member of the male gender, the younger Saotome spotted his fianc's change in expression immediately. "Hey! What's up? Why're ya smilin' like that?"
Changing her expression again into a sugary sweet smile, Akane replied, "Well, Ranma, I just remembered this little deal we made about me managing to hit you."
Now incredibly wary at the radically changing emotions his fiancé displayed, Ranma asked cautiously, "Yeah. What of it?" Then remembering what happened just a moment before and the specifics of said deal, he did the logical, rational thing: the heir to the Saotome school panicked.
"Ah, c'mon Akane! That didn't count! I was... er... distracted! Yeah! That's it: distracted!"
Still smiling in that same sugary sweet way, Akane innocently replied, "Oh my, Ranma! I never thought you would be such a liar! It's so sad. Not only am I engaged to an idiot, but he's a dishonorable, lying idiot."
"Hey! Cut it out, Akane! I ain't no liar! I just-"
A cuff to the head interrupted Ranma. "C'mon, Ranma! Be a man! If you promised your fiancé a smooch for congratulations, then you should keep your word! Your honor as a martial artist depends on it, boy!"
"Shut up, old man!"
Grabbing the arm Genma had encouragingly placed on his shoulder with both hands, Ranma performed a judo throw, sending his oft over ambitious father into the koi pond. Nonetheless, Genma, as always, managed to get in the last word, or at least made an attempt to do so. The man turned panda flashed out a sign, which read, Stop acting like a girl, Ranma! Unfortunately, as a result of the lack of light on moonless nights, neither Ranma nor Akane could even see that Genma had held up a sign. Thus, another wooden sign shot up. Aren't you listening, boy! Once again, Mr. Saotome was thwarted, in his attempt to communicate, by the lack of light outside.
Back inside the dojo, matters were heating up once again.
"I ain't apologizin'! I already said ya cheated!"
"Fine, Ranma! But, if you're going to be such a jerk about keeping promises, you should at least train me!"
"If I do train ya, will ya shut up about it?"
"Yes, but you'd better not lie this time."
Slumping his shoulders, Ranma finally agreed. "Fine, ya tomboy! I'll do it."
Instantly brightening, Akane smiled warmly at Ranma. "Thanks, Ranma." For an instant, the younger Saotome was tempted to almost call the smile cute. Then the moment passed, as Akane huffed and walked off, tossing a warning over her shoulder: "You'd better be serious about this, Ranma."
Ranma scolded himself. "Cute? Man, that hit musta unscrewed my brain or somethin'. There's no way I'd ever go for some uncute, built like a brick tomboy like Akane."
"I heard that Ranma!"
"Ah man!"
-o- -o- -o-
The next few days at Furinkan occurred without incident. Ryouga woke up a few hours after his defeat, went to avenge his loss, and promptly became lost. Tatewaki Kuno had not appeared on campus since his loss either. There were the expected rumors that he was training for vengeance; Ranma ignored these whispered warnings. Even with a few months worth of training, the kendoist couldn't beat him.
Unfortunately, Akane and Ranma's relationship benefited little from the lack of interruptions. A combination of stubbornness and annoyance with their engagement kept the two Anything Goes heirs warring with one another. Admittedly, the rumors that Akane's sudden marriage was the result of an unexpected pregnancy didn't help matters, and neither did Furinkan's continually attacking, male horde, but the couple's own interpersonal difficulties were the root cause of their animosity.
In contrast, Nabiki and Goku's friendship was blooming at a remarkable rate. Having an elite martial artist who worked for free in her employ was a boon for the middle Tendo sister and, in Nabiki, Son Goku had discovered a sort of mother/older sister figure he'd always desired. The tailed teen had found a father in Genma and brothers in both Ranma and Ryouga, replacing the grandfather he had lost, but there were no female influences in his young life. Goku was finding that he really liked having Nabiki in his life.
The youngest student of Anything Goes martial arts wandered through the main floor of the Tendo home. Yawning, Goku wandered towards the refrigerator, looking for a late night snack.
Slowly opening the refrigerator door, the young Saiyajin caught sight of the food inside and his mouth watered. Piles of rice and fresh fish stocked every shelf; for Goku, this was heaven. Piling half the refrigerator's contents on a large plate, the martial artist placed the small feast on the table and grinned. Out of nowhere, the Saiyajin youth pulled a quartet of chop sticks, wielding two in each hand, in preparation for the one part of the Saotome school's art neither Ranma nor Genma had ever defeated him in.
"Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts Food Fighting ultimate technique! Strike of the Starving Elephant!"
In a blur of motion, Goku's chopsticks shot foodstuffs into his mouth. Less than two seconds later, the Saiyajin's assault on the fish and rice ended, however, the plate cleared. The teenager's mouth was brimming with various foods. Then, with a giant gulp, nearly ten pounds of assorted food was swallowed.
Patting his stomach contentedly, the boy grinned. "Wow! That really hit the spot!"
"An impressive show, boy! But are you ready for a real test!"
Goku spun around to face his surrogate father. He'd never figure out how someone so big could move so quietly. "Huh? What test?"
Taking a monolithic pose, Genma stood solemnly. "It's a mission only a true martial artist could manage, boy! Even Ranma couldn't possibly do this!"
The last remaining Son was becoming intrigued. Ranma was a really good martial artist: even better than he was at martial arts. For Mr. Saotome to entrust him with such a difficult mission was a true show of the Anything Goes master's confidence in him. Goku wouldn't let him down!
"So harrowing is this test boy, that I would not even dare go with you! Are you up to the challenge, Goku?"
"Yeah!"
"Alright then!" Mr. Saotome placed his arms behind his back, adopting a contemplative pose. "A famous master of the art, Tsuru'sennin, has recently entered Nerima with his pupils. It is rumored that he carries with him a scroll for the bukujutsu, a technique that will allow one to fly. I need you to get it for me, Goku! You're the only one who can do it!"
Looking confused, Goku scratched the back of his head nervously. "But isn't that stealing? Ranma always said that stealing was pretty bad."
Sweating nervously, Genma replied, "Er... no, Goku. It's only stealing if you don't have permission to take something, but I'm giving you permission, so it's okay!"
"Oh! I guess that makes sense."
Grinning, Goku waved good bye and sprinted out the Tendo's front door. Mr. Saotome would be so proud of him! It was so great that he could help the closest thing he'd ever had to a father like this!
From the inside the Tendo homestead, Genma Saotome smirked triumphantly. He was a little bit annoyed with Ranma for filling the boy's head with wimpy rubbish about not stealing, but there was still time to fix his heir's way of thinking. Goku was great for appropriating techniques from other martial artists. That ability was a boon for the Saotome school. Anything Goes had always thrived on the adaptation to and incorporation of other martial arts. Since, he'd discovered Goku, his half of the school had grown to the point where he could likely rival even the master. If the air dance could be added to his repertoire, as well, none would be able to challenge him. Finally, the Saotomes would be masters of the air.
-o- -o- -o-
Ranma awoke with a splash.
"Come on, boy! A true martial artist should be ready at all times!"
Leaping down from his window, Genma joined his son in the Tendo yard. Looking serious, the elder Saotome moved into a stance with both arms extended like a bird's wings. The posture assisted with balance and was ideal for launching in the air: the true testing ground for any of the Saotome school's students.
"Oh, how it pains me to see my son acting so weak and girlish!"
By this point, Ranma was becoming seriously annoyed. Throwing him into the pond was one thing and patronizing was also not on Ranma's list of favorite things his father did, but insulting his manhood was going too far.
"Shut up, ya old fart!"
A burst of energy marked the explosion of a blazing blue battle aura around Ranma. Then, effortlessly vaulting forty feet into the air, Ranma torqued his body downwards. Combining gravity with the techniques of his chosen art, Ranma fired at his father.
Showing the skills that had made him the master, Genma dodged with a back flip, striking his son with a pair of kicks in the process. "You're getting slow, boy!" Reversing his momentum, as he touched the ground, Mr. Saotome shot forward, opening up with a blitz of ki charged punches.
Finding himself abruptly on the defensive, Ranma began to lose ground, gradually being herded towards the pond. The old man had always been a couple of steps ahead of him and seemed to have a bottomless well of techniques, but the pigtailed martial artist was closing the gap between the two of them. For the past year, he had been gaining ground. Between his fights with Ryouga, Goku and his father, he'd improved to the point where he was almost Genma's equal. Unfortunately, there is a large gap between being something and almost being something.
"C'mon, pops! I could take this all day!" Ranma affirmed, smirking cockily in his father's direction, as he barely dodged the continuous barrage of blows directed his way.
"Hmph," Genma replied in annoyance at the fact that he had yet to connect. "If that's true, then why have you left AN OPENING!"
The elder martial artist right foot snaked forward in a trip, knocking Ranma into the pond for a second time that morning. He laughed. "Ha ha, boy! That'll teach you to disrespect your elders!"
A female voice rose up from the pond, accompanied by a powerful splash of water. "Sorry, but I just ain't never respected a panda."
Genma, drenched and in panda form, after Ranma's splash, grimaced, holding up one of his seemingly infinite supply of signs. That was a cheap shot, boy.
Before the two cursed individuals could begin a pseudo verbal spar, a cheery voice rang out from the kitchen of the Tendo home. "Ranma, Mr. Saotome, breakfast is ready!"
Boy, I'll teach you a lesson later. For now, there are more important things to do.
Ranma disagreed with his father's sentiments. "Feh! You just wanna feed your fat stomach!" Then again, his sprint after his father was no slower for his disdain.
As usual, the first thing that greeted Ranma upon arrival to the kitchen was Kasumi's warm smile. "Oh my, Ranma! You're all wet. Don't worry. The kettle will be boiled in just a few minutes."
"Thanks, Kasumi. Being a girl really sucks!"
"What do you mean by that, Ranma?" Akane intoned icily from across the table. "I don't see what's so terrible about being a girl."
Ranma shrugged easily, ignoring the warning in Akane's tone. "Ah c'mon! I suppose girls ain't bad fer cookin' or cleanin', but they're too weak to take on a real man."
That spark lit a fire in the part of Akane that hated the constant discrimination against women in Japanese society. She yelled a scathing reply, Ranma responded in kind, and the petty bickering was on.
Ignoring the arguing fianc's, Soun turned to his old friend in congratulations. "You've really improved, Saotome. You've done a splendid job with your heir, but I think you're much stronger than before the trip as well. I must commend you, Saotome."
Normally, Genma would have replied with a boastful speech about his abilities. Pandas aren't to skilled at speaking, however, so he just held up a sign instead. Darn right, Tendo! The boy and Goku really kept me on my feet!
Nabiki preferred, unlike her family, to eat silently, and would normally use breakfast to plan her day. However, today, a more pressing consideration occupied her mind.
"Where's Goku?"
Conversation at the breakfast table stopped instantly. Looking around the room, both the Tendos and Saotomes confirmed that, in fact, Goku had not arrived for a meal: a seeming impossibility.
Ever since Goku had arrived at the dojo, two characteristics of his had become readily apparent. The tailed youth was a fantastic martial artist and had an absolutely insatiable hunger. For him to decide to skip breakfast was analogous to the sun deciding it needed a vacation or the king of the world ordering that they act freely; the boy missing breakfast couldn't possibly be of his own volition.
Ranma shot out of his chair, visibly worried. "What the heck? There ain't no way Goku'd miss a meal! What could've happened to the little guy?"
Almost as if in answer to Ranma query, a dart shot through the Tendo family's window, impacting against the center of the family's kitchen table. Attached to the black, purple-striped dart was a note.
Quickly grabbing the piece of paper and taking a glance, Mr. Tendo burst into tears. "Oh no! They've taken my dearest son! What a tragedy! What a-"
"Hey! Wait a sec, Mr. Tendo!" The older man ceased his bawling momentarily. "Since when do you have a son !?!"
For a few seconds, the Tendo patriarch mulled over his future son-in-law's statement. "An excellent point, Ranma. I don't have a son. But then what could this note possible mean?"
Ranma snatched the piece of paper, this time reading the words elaborately written on it aloud. "Dear Mr. Tendo, We have your son. If you don't come to claim him at the gates of Furinkan High School by dawn today, your son will die in a most painful manner." The note was left unsigned.
Nabiki grimaced. "I'd give good odds that they've mistaken Goku for your son, dad. We'd better go save him."
As the entirety of the Tendo household, save only Kasumi, sprinted towards the high school (Nabiki carried in her father's arms to allow for greater speed), something weird about that note finally struck Ranma. Admittedly, he or someone else may have come to the conclusion earlier, but they were in a rather stressful situation. In fact, the sun in his eyes was what ultimately clued him in.
"What the heck !?! The sun was up before we even got that note! Whadda they mean he'll die if we don't show up before dawn !?!"
-o- -o- -o-
"Ugh! I'm so hungry! I haven't eaten for hours! I'm gonna die if you don't feed me soon!" Son Goku moaned pitifully. Bound with steel chains to a massive pike his captors had placed between the school gates, the Saiyajin was incredibly hungry. Admittedly, he could likely last another month or so, but his stomach was writhing in agony.
"Good! Make sure you die quickly, as well. You said you would be dead almost three hours ago!"
"Must... have breakfast... or else... I'll die."
"Excellent! Get on with it then! If I'd known you would take this long to die, I would have set the date of our revenge for tomorrow. One simply cannot have a proper battle without one fallen comrade to avenge on one side or the other!"
Glancing away from his captive for a few seconds, Tsuru'sennin -- the ancient Crane master -- gazed gleefully at his disciples. "Tien, Choutzu, are you both prepared?" The students of the Crane school nodded solemnly. "Excellent! Any moment now, the Tendos will be arriving. We will have our revenge on the Anything Goes school for trying to steal our most sacred technique!"
A quartet of figures in martial arts attire became visible in the distance. Foremost, a young boy and an older man were hopping along rooftops at a dazzling pace. Just behind them, another older man, this one clad in samurai armor approached, carrying a teen aged girl. Finally, a dark-haired girl, wearing a yellow gi was running through the streets at top speed. "Heh heh! It appears that the Tendos have arrived."
Ranma was the first to reach the trio clothed in blue gis bearing the Crane school's insignia. "Give us back our friend!" he yelled, glaring at the older man who seemed to be the leader.
"Don't you mean... your brother: Goku Tendo!" The Crane master cackled evilly.
"Um... no," Ranma replied, looking confused. "What makes you think me and Goku are Tendos? We're just staying at their dojo for a while."
"What !?! That ruins all the drama! What sort of epic conflict is over a friend !?! Lovers and brothers are one thing, but friends!" The ancient martial arts master scowled. "I suppose friends will have to do!"
By this time, the entirety of the party of Tendos and Saotomes had arrived. The four martial artists faced Tsuru'sennin, prepared for anything, while Nabiki moved away from the battle at a brisk walk. There was no way she could assist her companions in a fight, but, if she could get Goku free, there was no way her family could lose.
"Tien, Choutzu: I will defeat this impudent fool of a boy. Split the remainder of the wretches amongst yourselves." Then, defying Ranma's ability to dodge, Tsuru'sennin struck with a knifelike blow to the head.
The blow would have slain lesser mortals in a blow; Ranma was not a lesser mortal. Nonetheless, the attack sent him careening into and through the school gate. He stood groggily, attempting to regain his equilibrium, but Tsuru'sennin was already upon him. "Not dead? You're stronger than I anticipated, but it will not be enough!"
As hammer and knife blows assaulted Ranma, the Anything Goes fighter was unable to get his bearings. "I've gotta go to the air," he thought, twisting out of the way of yet another strike. Bending his knees, in the moment of respite the dodge gave him, the younger Saotome leapt fifty feet into the air, using the techniques of his school to maximize air resistance. "Good. Now that I'm up here there's no way that jerk can take me."
"Is that so?" a voice asked from above him.
"What? How did you-" Ranma's second query was effectively cut off by a, literally, flying kick to his gut. As he crashed into the ground, the pigtailed martial artist's mind spun. That man had been flying. Not hovering by increasing air resistance, but actually flying. There was no way he could match the old master in the air or on the ground. This was going to get rough.
-o- -o- -o-
As Akane saw the apparent leader of Goku's kidnappers smash Ranma through a wall, she quickly moved to intercede. If the old man had beaten Ranma that easily, there was no way she could defeat him, but maybe she could buy Ranma the time he needed to recover. The youngest Tendo daughter leaped in between the Crane master and his target, or at least tried to do so.
"What the heck?" She couldn't move. Not just her legs, but her entire body was frozen in place. Then she noticed the chalk white-skinned figure hovering above her position, a finger pointed in her direction. He was smirking.
"Nothing can escape my ultimate technique. Now watch what I can do with you." He gestured with his forefinger and Akane flew into one of the school's concrete walls in a bone jarring impact. "You can't win. Nyaah! Nyaah!" The doll-like figure stuck out his tongue at Akane, as the mockery continued.
Seeing his daughter's distress, Soun ran towards her. "Akane!" Unfortunately, the master of the Tendo school was so focused on Akane's predicament that he entirely missed the ki beam that impacted with his back, plowing him through a brick wall and into unconsciousness.
"What a fool," scoffed Tien." He couldn't even keep his mind on his opponents.
Out of nowhere, a wooden sign impacted with his skull, knocking the three-eyed for a loop. "What the heck was that !?!" he yelled picking up the scrap of wood. There were words printed on the sign; he read them. Inattention is a fault which you seem to suffer from as well, boy. After all, you didn't even dodge the punch!
"That wasn't a punch! It was a cheap shot!"
"That's right, boy!" a solemn voice came from behind the triclops. "This is the punch."
A massive uppercut sent Tien flying back twenty feet before he could reorient himself with the bukujitsu technique. "Whoever you are, you're not going to beat the heir Tsuru'sennin's heir!" The three-eyed martial artist leaped to the air and put a hand to his forehead. "Rapid fire Dodonpa!"
A veritable array of ki beams lanced the ground, forcing Tien's opponent to finally reveal himself. From behind a tree, Genma leaped across the school yard, temporarily out of Tien's range. The white gi wearing martial arts master needed a plan. Between his enemy's ability to fly and the ki beams, his defense was practically invulnerable. If Genma stopped long enough to charge his own blast in return, he'd be struck; the same thing would happen if he leapt into the air. For now, he would have to dodge and hope the boy ran out of ki before he made a lucky shot.
-o- -o- -o-
Unbeknownst to the combatants, three other variables had just entered the Furinkan school yard. One, Nabiki Tendo, was considering scaling the pike, in order to free Goku. Normally, she wouldn't even consider trying something like her current plan to save her the kid. Even for someone in good shape, like her, climbing straight up a twenty-five foot tall pole was nigh on impossible. She walked up to the pike and placed a hand on the smooth wood, as if to begin, and halted.
"Come on, Nabiki," she thought to herself. "This plan is ridiculous and won't work. It's the sort of thing Goku would come up with and didn't you swear not to ever try anything the crazy midget suggested. There has to be another way; just think!"
Then the answer came to her in the form of a slowly emerging figure, clad in a kendo uniform, wielding a bokken at his side. "Nabiki Tendo! Where is my tigress, Akane Tendo? I will pay you handsomely for the information!"
Regretting the fact that she was about to pass up easy money, Nabiki forced a predatory smile. "Now, now, Kuno-baby, I couldn't possibly take money from you. There's just a little something I need done."
"Ask and I shall do anything for knowledge of my tigress, Nabiki!"
Her smile widened just slightly. Kuno was so easy to manipulate. "Oh, it's nothing serious! I just think this pole they put in the middle of the gates is a bit unseemly. Couldn't you cut it down, Kuno-baby?"
"Truly, t'is a boorish ornament. I agree to your terms, Nabiki Tendo!" Without another word, the Blue Thunder bared his bokken and smote down the pike, knocking Goku to the ground. "Ah! As I anticipated, the monstrous cretin Son Goku was responsible for this-"
Nabiki had to think fast before Kuno took out a helpless, hungry and exhausted Goku. "Look Kuno, a... er... ghoul has assaulted my sister!"
"What? Who dares attack my tigress?" The kendoist's eyes turned towards Akane, who continued to be beaten against the walls of Furinkan telekinetically. "Do not think your time has passed, Son Goku. I shall smite thee in just a few minutes!" Kuno sprinted in his love's direction. After almost a weak training in an advanced variation on kendo, none would stand in the way of his quest for Akane Tendo's heart.
Nabiki, ran in the opposite direction: towards Goku. "You'd better appreciate this, kiddo. I could have scammed Kuno for a lot of money just now." Taking out a lock pick she'd had crafted for just such an occasion, the most mercenary of the Tendos began working at the steel chains' lock. The lock wasn't exactly top grade, so she could probably unlock it in a few minutes tops. Then the jerks who'd stolen her best assistant would learn what happened when you messed with Nabiki Tendo.
Tatewaki Kuno and Nabiki made two variables, but a third unexpected arrival had just entered the Furinkan High property, as well.
"Curse you, Ranma! How dare you cheat like that Ranma !?!" The bandanna wearing warrior thought he heard Saotome's scream. "Darn you, Ranma! Now I'm even hearing your voice in my-" A second scream, this time closer, cut short Ryouga's monologue.
"Huh? Where's that voice coming from?" The lost boy looked up, down, but never even considered the wall beside him, until Ranma Saotome came crashing through the concrete fence, landing on top of him.
"Damn you Ranma! How dare you land on me !?!"
The pig-tailed boy looked momentarily surprised and then grinned. "Man, Ryouga! Am I ever glad to see-"
A rather violent and powerful punch knocked Ranma through yet another wall, effectively cutting him off. "Heh heh! For all the hell you've put me through Ranma, prepare to-"
As seemed to be becoming a pattern, Ryouga was cut off, as a Dodonpa struck him, hurling the umbrella wielding martial artist back a half dozen feet. "What the heck !?!" The occasional student of Anything Goes looked upwards and cursed. Some old geezer was floating in the air and shooting those thin little beams all over the place. Worse yet, the scum bag had hit him: him, Ryouga Hibiki. No one blasts Ryouga Hibiki and gets away with it.
Hurling his umbrella at the master of the Crane school, as if the bamboo construct was boomerang, the eternally lost boy smirked sadistically as his weapon began spinning like a buzz saw. "Die!"
Getting up from his fourth crash through a wall that day, Ranma looked at his longtime rival and smirked. "Changed yer mind 'bout helpin' me out, Ryouga?"
"Don't think this makes us friends, or anything, Ranma. I'm only helping you because that old man really pissed me off."
"Oh yah! Well it ain't like I like workin' with a wimp like you, but these guys wanna hurt Goku. I ain't lettin' them do it!"
Ranma's words seemed to sober Ryouga, stopping his rage from exploding at Ranma's insults. "They hurt Goku?"
"Yep. The old guy even said he wanted to kill the little guy."
Ryouga's expression seemed to darken, as his eyes narrowed to slits. Besides his parents, Ryouga had few things he truly valued in the world. There was his life, his dog and one friend: the only friend he had ever made. That friend's name was Son Goku. No one threatened Ryouga Hibiki's friends and survived.
"He's dead!"
Ignoring the blasts of chi energy raining all over the streets, Ryouga leapt straight towards his assailant. If all went well, he'd reach the old geezer at about the same time as his umbrella and then there was going to be pain for the man who had dared threaten his friend: a lot of pain.
End Chapter Three
Author Notes: That was a fun chapter to write, though the fight scene was a little darker than I originally intended. Oh well. I guess Tien and Choutzu just aren't very lighthearted characters. Next chapter the fight comes to an exciting conclusion and things lighten up again; the violence won't last for too long. I suppose I should also thank all those who have and continue to review. I received one suggestion I liked and am incorporating into the story. Ah yes! For those who want to know if Goku and Nabiki are being paired together, I don't know why I would ever tell you who is going to end up together. That would ruin all the wonderful suspense. Thanks again for the reviews and see you at my next update.