Chapter 3
The house was too big.
Well, at least it was ten times the size of what Cerberus was used to.
These were the first thoughts that entered her mind as she stared around the hallway of Haruka's enormous estate.
"Do you actually live in this cavern?" she asked, incredulous.
Haruka was temporarily taken aback by the dog's lack of manners.
"Uh, yeah, um…do you like it?" she asked rather lamely.
"Can I ask you something?" Cerberus asked.
"I believe you just did."
Cerberus paused for a few seconds before continuing.
"Do you live alone in this place?"
"No."
"I suspected as much."
Cerberus surveyed the area, taking note of several art projects that could potentially be used as weapons. It suddenly dawned on her that she may have been rather rude, and started to apologize.
"Uh, sorry about that," she said, mentally hitting herself over the head with a tire iron. "I guess I have been acting kind of like a bi–"
"Nah, don't worry about it."
There was an awkward pause.
Haruka finally broke the silence. "So, uh, you must be hungry…"
She was interrupted by an impossibly loud roar that came from the dog's stomach.
Both of them sweatdropped.
"So, what does a regular bitch like you like to eat?"
"Please don't call me that, it stopped being funny six years ago."
Haruka faltered. "How old are you, anyway?"
Cerberus shrugged. "I dunno…I lost count. My guess is about nine.
"So, about the food…"
"Oh, yeah," Haruka said, rooting through the pantry, which was nearly empty. "What do you like, KD? Take-out pizza?"
"Lemme guess," Cerberus replied, "you're not the cook around here?"
Haruka flushed.
"Well, can't complain. It doesn't really matter, especially when you've spent much of your life eating out of garbage cans."
For some odd reason, this made Haruka feel better.
Forty-five minutes later, Haruka and her newly acquired dog friend were sitting on the couch, chowing down on some meat-lovers' pizza, and watching a badly dubbed American movie.
Cerberus' lampshade was lying in the garbage.
"Oh, God, it's so funny to see Arnold Schwarzenegger speaking Japanese," Haruka laughed.
Cerberus, of course, had no clue who the hell Arnold Schwarzenegger was, but it did seem rather funny to see him spouting ridiculous phrases that people never said anymore.
When he fired his gun, blowing some faceless thug's face off, he shouted an obviously dubbed "you die now."
Haruka choked a bit, but Cerberus laughed out loud. And her laugh could only be described as creepy.
She was laughing cruelly, not at the language, but at the fact that the man's face had been blown off. Her continuous, mirthless laughter freaked Haruka out a bit. She took a closer look at the dog's face.
There was a cruel look on her face, and she was thumping the floor with her front paw in an attempt to control her insane, Esmeraude-esque laughter. Eventually, she stopped, and looked a bit embarrassed.
Haruka made a mental note to keep sharp objects away from Cerberus.
After the movie, Haruka fell asleep or passed out on the couch. Cerberus had the distinct impression that extremely greasy pizza and stale sake didn't mix very well.
Cerberus watched her for a few minutes, to make sure she was really asleep. Between loud snores, Haruka would clench her fists and mutter incoherent things under her breath.
"…Shut up, Seiya…"
Cerberus had to resist the temptation to laugh.
"…Get away from Odango-Atama, Seiya, you bastard…"
"Who's Seiya?"
Haruka jumped into consciousness; obviously unaware of the fact that Cerberus was watching her.
"Huh?"
"I said, who's Seiya?"
Haruka really didn't feel like explaining the details of that creepy hermaphrodite alien to a talking dog at the moment.
"Uh…just some guy."
Cerberus raised an eyebrow. "I see."
Haruka flushed beet red. "It's not what you think! I…he…odango…"
"It's okay, you can tell me, I'm open-minded," Cerberus said in a voice full of wicked, devilish amusement.
Haruka was getting a bit angry. "It's not what you think," she said flatly. "We hated each other."
"Oh, sure, that's what they all say."
Cerberus was about to say something else, but Haruka gave her a withering glare that stopped her in her tracks.
"I…HAVE…SOMEONE," she said angrily.
Cerberus raised her eyebrows dubiously.
Haruka pointed to a framed photograph of herself and a pretty woman with blue hair.
Cerberus' eyebrows disappeared underneath the filthy black rag that was fixed around her forehead. If her face were not covered with fur, she would have flushed furiously and visibly.
"S-sorry! I didn't know, I-I…"
Cerberus' ears fell on top of her head, and her tail tucked between her legs. She looked so horribly embarrassed that Haruka relaxed a bit. Despite the dog's huge size, she seemed to act more like a puppy than a feral wolf. Hell, sometimes she was downright cute.
After yet another incredibly awkward pause, Cerberus said, "Uh…I guess I should get to bed…" She yawned hugely and falsely, showing dozens of cruelly edged teeth. "Where do I sleep, outside?"
Haruka pointed to the couch.
Cerberus jumped up onto the couch. "Thanks," she said, curling up into a tight ball on the couch with her nose buried in the base of her tail.
"Don't worry about it," Haruka said drowsily.
Cerberus wagged her tail a few times before drifting off to sleep.
Cerberus was walking along the street with several other dogs, each of which were wagging their tails with glee. A tiny Chihuahua was sitting on top of her head. For once in her traumatic life, Cerberus was happy.
A police car pulled up.
Cerberus and company instinctively backed into an alleyway, shrinking into the shadows.
Gunshots. Blinding pain. Screams. Maniacal laughter…
"ARRRRRRRRRGH!!!"
Cerberus woke with a scream. Tears were flowing out of her eyes; sweat running out of her feet. She trembled for a minute, breathing heavily. Her pulse roared in her ears.
Those God damned flashbacks.
Haruka came running into the room.
"What the hell? Cerberus, what the hell is wrong?"
She just stared into Haruka's eyes, shaking her head.
"Nothing."
The house was too big.
Well, at least it was ten times the size of what Cerberus was used to.
These were the first thoughts that entered her mind as she stared around the hallway of Haruka's enormous estate.
"Do you actually live in this cavern?" she asked, incredulous.
Haruka was temporarily taken aback by the dog's lack of manners.
"Uh, yeah, um…do you like it?" she asked rather lamely.
"Can I ask you something?" Cerberus asked.
"I believe you just did."
Cerberus paused for a few seconds before continuing.
"Do you live alone in this place?"
"No."
"I suspected as much."
Cerberus surveyed the area, taking note of several art projects that could potentially be used as weapons. It suddenly dawned on her that she may have been rather rude, and started to apologize.
"Uh, sorry about that," she said, mentally hitting herself over the head with a tire iron. "I guess I have been acting kind of like a bi–"
"Nah, don't worry about it."
There was an awkward pause.
Haruka finally broke the silence. "So, uh, you must be hungry…"
She was interrupted by an impossibly loud roar that came from the dog's stomach.
Both of them sweatdropped.
"So, what does a regular bitch like you like to eat?"
"Please don't call me that, it stopped being funny six years ago."
Haruka faltered. "How old are you, anyway?"
Cerberus shrugged. "I dunno…I lost count. My guess is about nine.
"So, about the food…"
"Oh, yeah," Haruka said, rooting through the pantry, which was nearly empty. "What do you like, KD? Take-out pizza?"
"Lemme guess," Cerberus replied, "you're not the cook around here?"
Haruka flushed.
"Well, can't complain. It doesn't really matter, especially when you've spent much of your life eating out of garbage cans."
For some odd reason, this made Haruka feel better.
Forty-five minutes later, Haruka and her newly acquired dog friend were sitting on the couch, chowing down on some meat-lovers' pizza, and watching a badly dubbed American movie.
Cerberus' lampshade was lying in the garbage.
"Oh, God, it's so funny to see Arnold Schwarzenegger speaking Japanese," Haruka laughed.
Cerberus, of course, had no clue who the hell Arnold Schwarzenegger was, but it did seem rather funny to see him spouting ridiculous phrases that people never said anymore.
When he fired his gun, blowing some faceless thug's face off, he shouted an obviously dubbed "you die now."
Haruka choked a bit, but Cerberus laughed out loud. And her laugh could only be described as creepy.
She was laughing cruelly, not at the language, but at the fact that the man's face had been blown off. Her continuous, mirthless laughter freaked Haruka out a bit. She took a closer look at the dog's face.
There was a cruel look on her face, and she was thumping the floor with her front paw in an attempt to control her insane, Esmeraude-esque laughter. Eventually, she stopped, and looked a bit embarrassed.
Haruka made a mental note to keep sharp objects away from Cerberus.
After the movie, Haruka fell asleep or passed out on the couch. Cerberus had the distinct impression that extremely greasy pizza and stale sake didn't mix very well.
Cerberus watched her for a few minutes, to make sure she was really asleep. Between loud snores, Haruka would clench her fists and mutter incoherent things under her breath.
"…Shut up, Seiya…"
Cerberus had to resist the temptation to laugh.
"…Get away from Odango-Atama, Seiya, you bastard…"
"Who's Seiya?"
Haruka jumped into consciousness; obviously unaware of the fact that Cerberus was watching her.
"Huh?"
"I said, who's Seiya?"
Haruka really didn't feel like explaining the details of that creepy hermaphrodite alien to a talking dog at the moment.
"Uh…just some guy."
Cerberus raised an eyebrow. "I see."
Haruka flushed beet red. "It's not what you think! I…he…odango…"
"It's okay, you can tell me, I'm open-minded," Cerberus said in a voice full of wicked, devilish amusement.
Haruka was getting a bit angry. "It's not what you think," she said flatly. "We hated each other."
"Oh, sure, that's what they all say."
Cerberus was about to say something else, but Haruka gave her a withering glare that stopped her in her tracks.
"I…HAVE…SOMEONE," she said angrily.
Cerberus raised her eyebrows dubiously.
Haruka pointed to a framed photograph of herself and a pretty woman with blue hair.
Cerberus' eyebrows disappeared underneath the filthy black rag that was fixed around her forehead. If her face were not covered with fur, she would have flushed furiously and visibly.
"S-sorry! I didn't know, I-I…"
Cerberus' ears fell on top of her head, and her tail tucked between her legs. She looked so horribly embarrassed that Haruka relaxed a bit. Despite the dog's huge size, she seemed to act more like a puppy than a feral wolf. Hell, sometimes she was downright cute.
After yet another incredibly awkward pause, Cerberus said, "Uh…I guess I should get to bed…" She yawned hugely and falsely, showing dozens of cruelly edged teeth. "Where do I sleep, outside?"
Haruka pointed to the couch.
Cerberus jumped up onto the couch. "Thanks," she said, curling up into a tight ball on the couch with her nose buried in the base of her tail.
"Don't worry about it," Haruka said drowsily.
Cerberus wagged her tail a few times before drifting off to sleep.
Cerberus was walking along the street with several other dogs, each of which were wagging their tails with glee. A tiny Chihuahua was sitting on top of her head. For once in her traumatic life, Cerberus was happy.
A police car pulled up.
Cerberus and company instinctively backed into an alleyway, shrinking into the shadows.
Gunshots. Blinding pain. Screams. Maniacal laughter…
"ARRRRRRRRRGH!!!"
Cerberus woke with a scream. Tears were flowing out of her eyes; sweat running out of her feet. She trembled for a minute, breathing heavily. Her pulse roared in her ears.
Those God damned flashbacks.
Haruka came running into the room.
"What the hell? Cerberus, what the hell is wrong?"
She just stared into Haruka's eyes, shaking her head.
"Nothing."