The Yaoi Adventures of Hugo
Disclaimer: It's unfortunate, but I, Digidude, TrekTournament, Milliatantrum, author (take your pick) do not own Suikoden III (or any other part of the series for that matter).
Melville: God bless us, everyone.
BUT!
Sebastian: Ack! Hide!
I can write fanfiction about it. Heh, the Suikoden series has got to be the best hentai trigger ever. Never has there been a better source of characters to splice together in random couplings. My main preference being yaoi, this is a god-send.
All the male cast members: NOOOOOOO!!!!!
Here now is my own little parody on the idea that Hugo is a blithering gay pervert who wants to do it with all the good-looking (or at least all the non-ugly, non-old, and otherwise tolerable and agreeable) guys in Suikoden III. This shall be done in parts. Oh, and don't think Hugo won't be gaining "help" along the way.
Adventure #1: Bath Time!
Hugo was tired after a long day of beating the hinnies off random monsters.
"Man, it's so weird how they pop up out of nowhere. Furthermore, stronger monsters seem to show up as I get stronger. Very strange."
As he pondered this he continued his walk down through the basement of Budehuc castle. He realized that Thomas had renamed the place Budehuc even though it had already been named Budehuc prior to the aforementioned naming. No one seemed to notice this fact but him. He figured after all that had been happening lately a small detail like renaming a castle the same name it had been before was a minor weirdness and easy to overlook.
He turned the corner toward the large wrecked ship that had embedded itself into the poor dilapidated building. He remembered how convenient it was that the hole on the ship's side and the large hole it made in the basement aligned perfectly to allow entry into either facility. This was also irrelevant to Hugo (as well as the plot, if there is one) and so he continued onward slapping five to Bazba as he passed.
"Hey, gomey-G," the large lizard man greeted.
"Yo," Hugo responded as he passed.
Soon he passed Twailin the dwarf. Stopping, he peared over the gaping hole the old man had dug and was presently pulling himself out of.
"Hey there, Twailin, what's up for the treasure huntin' today?" Hugo asked humorously.
"Oh, you won't believe it! I found a secret chamber down below with a small library in it!" the old coot cackled.
"Um, that's the third basement floor the elevator can reach it easy."
"Oh."
Twailin's grin flopped into a frown.
"I'm assuming we know these two as well."
Twailin reached down and pulled up Salome and Lucia, who's, if I, the author, might add, cloths were in much disarray.
"Um, mom, why were you and Salome down there instead of in the meeting room?" Hugo asked with a cock of his eyebrow, "Oh, and why do you have such an audacious gash down the front of your shirt?"
Lucia and Salome both blushed but Lucia quickly opened her mouth to respond.
"Oh, we had, you know, to discuss something. in private. yay."
"That still doesn't explain the rip on your shirt."
Lucia crawled out of the hole and got up to face her son glaring down at him in her usual motherly way.
"Don't worry about a thing, dear. Nothing to worry about. Yay, that's right. Now run along like a good boy."
She leaned over to pat her son on the head and then helped Salome out of the hole. The two continued to walk away, hand-in-hand. Hugo watched in utter confusion.
"I wonder what that was all about?"
"And you think I'm naïve." Twailin murmured to himself.
"What was that?"
"Oh, nothing."
"Well, OK. I'm off then"
"See ya."
"Right."
Hugo waved the kooky man goodbye and went on his way.
Hugo walked through the gaping hole of the ship and was making his way toward the stairs to the top of the vessel when he heard a womanly scream.
"Ahhh! Ahhh! Get it away from me!"
Hugo rushed over to see something quite interesting and strange. He halted to see poor Rico holding Fred in her arms while the tall man wriggled and screamed shrilly.
"Eeee! It's a monster!" Fred continued shrieking.
"It's just an ant, captain." Rico sighed wondering what she had done to disserve this.
Hugo rolled his eyes and figured it best not to mess with the two when Fred got that way. He could never understand how such a guy who could take on an Ogre Dragon single-handedly could be deathly afraid of creepy-crawlies.
Ignoring the spectacle up the galley stairs he strode soon feeling the cool sea breeze waft in his face. It was wonderful, a picturesque view of the large lake far off and a cool wind sifting about his body. Hugo stood smugly, that is, until a very rancid stench blew into his nose. Nearly keeling over he was saved by the wind as it carried the horrid smell away. He made his way to the railing and looked over to see Futch fainted on the ground and Sharon probing him with her spear.
"Hey, hey-hey!" the energetic, but annoying, girl said as she tried desperately to wake Futch up.
Hugo looked on a bit uneasy as a big bead of sweat dropped a ways down the side of his head.
"When will that guy learn that Bright gets gas when it eats fruit?" Hugo muttered to himself annoyed.
Hugo decided to let Sharon worry about Futch for the moment and walked off toward the bath house. As Hugo moved the cloth that adorned the entrance he was greeted by a very concerned Goro who was staring to the side of the room. Hugo turned to see both Aila and older Viki, in bath towels no less, waving fans in front of a downed Reed.
"I see Reed inhaled at the wrong moment," Hugo conjectured.
"You could say that," Goro agreed.
Goro suddenly realized he had another customer, the Flame Champion, no doubt.
"Oh, Hugo! Sorry, didn't realize it was you!"
"No worries, bro," Hugo smiled back.
"So, come to savor another luxurious bath by yours truly?"
Goro got up to look off to the horizon, if only the horizon had not been covered by a think wall of wood. Hugo took a step back fearing what Goro might do. He hated when the other boy got in this state and usually ended up prunier than he cared for.
"Uh, yay." Hugo stammered.
"It is a pleasure to serve you my master, my lord, my grand warrior!"
Goro turned to face Hugo with crazy possessed eyes that only one who worshipped Satan could match.
"I hope his head doesn't start spinning around," Hugo thought, a fear he had one too many times in the company of this strange teen.
Right, this way," Goro started for the men's side of the bath.
Not that I, the author, would know where that is since they never show you in the game which side is which. Even so, Hugo followed taking the towel Goro held out for him as he entered the bath room. He went on to disrobe himself. He, oddly enough, did this very slowly, all the while being completely oblivious to Goro's staring.
Goro was practically drooling, never had he thought Hugo so sexy. Sure, he had fantasies of taking Hugo full on and, well, doing very naughty things to him. But this, this was mesmerizing. The small but hard muscles covering Hugo's body was enough to make Goro's short-shorts tight, and considering how tight they looked on him in the first place this situation had to be painful.
Hugo finally wrapped the towel around his waist before walking off toward the large bath. He smiled charmingly at Goro as he passed making boy blush profusely. Goro continued to stare as Hugo walked off. Oh, that sweet rump clad in only a thin layer of cloth. If only, if only, IF ONLY. oh, what the hell.
Goro bolted forward at Hugo who was just taking off the towel. He flung himself through the air and bashed into Hugo head-on causing the two to go reeling into the bath with a loud splash. It didn't take long for either boy to come sputtering to the surface of the steamy water.
"What was *cough* that for!?" Hugo yelled a little too loudly.
Goro looked at Hugo longingly. It was also quite notable that his cloths had mysteriously removed themselves and now lay next to Hugo's on the other side of the room. What? Don't look at me like that. If I weren't allowed to use plot holes then why would they exist, huh? HUH? That's what I thought.
"Oh! Hugo, take me now!"
Goro flung himself at Hugo who grabbed him, though only out of reflex.
"You. what?" Hugo asked uneasily.
"I want you to do very naughty things to me! Please, my master, my lord, my grand warrior!"
Hugo looked bewildered even more but decided to kick characterization out the window and smiled devilishly. Grabbing Goro in a possessive hug he kissed the other full on the lips. After sucking on Goro for a few he let go and looked lovingly into Goro's eyes.
"Anything for you."
"Oh, Hugo! Please, show me the dirty, naughty things you will do to me! Please! Please do!" Goro called out.
"Alright!" Hugo yelled as he pushed Goro against the side of the bath.
As you can guess Hugo proceeded to do those naughty, naughty things to Goro. What you didn't know.
"Wow, I knew Goro was trying to make the bathes more pleasurable but, damn!" Aila said as she and Viki peered through the curtain.
"Shhh, not so loud, they'll hear us," Viki scolded while holding a finger to her lips.
The two girls continued to watch soon sighing simultaneously.
"Ah, yaoi."
THE END
After Words: My god, this turned out longer than I had originally planned. But, I had fun. I had meant for it to be a bit shorter only because I had one scene in mind, the bath scene. But, all the other weird antics the other characters situated between Hugo and the bath were just too funny to give up. Oddly enough, I think this story actually had a plot. somewhere. Oh well, maybe I'll find it in the next chapter. That's right, I'm continuing this. What? I told you that in the disclaimer. Pay attention next time. Don't worry, the yaoi is only one half of each story. The other is silly Suikoden parody. Ah yes, do send feedback. Feedback make me a happy little fellow.
-TrekTournament
Disclaimer: It's unfortunate, but I, Digidude, TrekTournament, Milliatantrum, author (take your pick) do not own Suikoden III (or any other part of the series for that matter).
Melville: God bless us, everyone.
BUT!
Sebastian: Ack! Hide!
I can write fanfiction about it. Heh, the Suikoden series has got to be the best hentai trigger ever. Never has there been a better source of characters to splice together in random couplings. My main preference being yaoi, this is a god-send.
All the male cast members: NOOOOOOO!!!!!
Here now is my own little parody on the idea that Hugo is a blithering gay pervert who wants to do it with all the good-looking (or at least all the non-ugly, non-old, and otherwise tolerable and agreeable) guys in Suikoden III. This shall be done in parts. Oh, and don't think Hugo won't be gaining "help" along the way.
Adventure #1: Bath Time!
Hugo was tired after a long day of beating the hinnies off random monsters.
"Man, it's so weird how they pop up out of nowhere. Furthermore, stronger monsters seem to show up as I get stronger. Very strange."
As he pondered this he continued his walk down through the basement of Budehuc castle. He realized that Thomas had renamed the place Budehuc even though it had already been named Budehuc prior to the aforementioned naming. No one seemed to notice this fact but him. He figured after all that had been happening lately a small detail like renaming a castle the same name it had been before was a minor weirdness and easy to overlook.
He turned the corner toward the large wrecked ship that had embedded itself into the poor dilapidated building. He remembered how convenient it was that the hole on the ship's side and the large hole it made in the basement aligned perfectly to allow entry into either facility. This was also irrelevant to Hugo (as well as the plot, if there is one) and so he continued onward slapping five to Bazba as he passed.
"Hey, gomey-G," the large lizard man greeted.
"Yo," Hugo responded as he passed.
Soon he passed Twailin the dwarf. Stopping, he peared over the gaping hole the old man had dug and was presently pulling himself out of.
"Hey there, Twailin, what's up for the treasure huntin' today?" Hugo asked humorously.
"Oh, you won't believe it! I found a secret chamber down below with a small library in it!" the old coot cackled.
"Um, that's the third basement floor the elevator can reach it easy."
"Oh."
Twailin's grin flopped into a frown.
"I'm assuming we know these two as well."
Twailin reached down and pulled up Salome and Lucia, who's, if I, the author, might add, cloths were in much disarray.
"Um, mom, why were you and Salome down there instead of in the meeting room?" Hugo asked with a cock of his eyebrow, "Oh, and why do you have such an audacious gash down the front of your shirt?"
Lucia and Salome both blushed but Lucia quickly opened her mouth to respond.
"Oh, we had, you know, to discuss something. in private. yay."
"That still doesn't explain the rip on your shirt."
Lucia crawled out of the hole and got up to face her son glaring down at him in her usual motherly way.
"Don't worry about a thing, dear. Nothing to worry about. Yay, that's right. Now run along like a good boy."
She leaned over to pat her son on the head and then helped Salome out of the hole. The two continued to walk away, hand-in-hand. Hugo watched in utter confusion.
"I wonder what that was all about?"
"And you think I'm naïve." Twailin murmured to himself.
"What was that?"
"Oh, nothing."
"Well, OK. I'm off then"
"See ya."
"Right."
Hugo waved the kooky man goodbye and went on his way.
Hugo walked through the gaping hole of the ship and was making his way toward the stairs to the top of the vessel when he heard a womanly scream.
"Ahhh! Ahhh! Get it away from me!"
Hugo rushed over to see something quite interesting and strange. He halted to see poor Rico holding Fred in her arms while the tall man wriggled and screamed shrilly.
"Eeee! It's a monster!" Fred continued shrieking.
"It's just an ant, captain." Rico sighed wondering what she had done to disserve this.
Hugo rolled his eyes and figured it best not to mess with the two when Fred got that way. He could never understand how such a guy who could take on an Ogre Dragon single-handedly could be deathly afraid of creepy-crawlies.
Ignoring the spectacle up the galley stairs he strode soon feeling the cool sea breeze waft in his face. It was wonderful, a picturesque view of the large lake far off and a cool wind sifting about his body. Hugo stood smugly, that is, until a very rancid stench blew into his nose. Nearly keeling over he was saved by the wind as it carried the horrid smell away. He made his way to the railing and looked over to see Futch fainted on the ground and Sharon probing him with her spear.
"Hey, hey-hey!" the energetic, but annoying, girl said as she tried desperately to wake Futch up.
Hugo looked on a bit uneasy as a big bead of sweat dropped a ways down the side of his head.
"When will that guy learn that Bright gets gas when it eats fruit?" Hugo muttered to himself annoyed.
Hugo decided to let Sharon worry about Futch for the moment and walked off toward the bath house. As Hugo moved the cloth that adorned the entrance he was greeted by a very concerned Goro who was staring to the side of the room. Hugo turned to see both Aila and older Viki, in bath towels no less, waving fans in front of a downed Reed.
"I see Reed inhaled at the wrong moment," Hugo conjectured.
"You could say that," Goro agreed.
Goro suddenly realized he had another customer, the Flame Champion, no doubt.
"Oh, Hugo! Sorry, didn't realize it was you!"
"No worries, bro," Hugo smiled back.
"So, come to savor another luxurious bath by yours truly?"
Goro got up to look off to the horizon, if only the horizon had not been covered by a think wall of wood. Hugo took a step back fearing what Goro might do. He hated when the other boy got in this state and usually ended up prunier than he cared for.
"Uh, yay." Hugo stammered.
"It is a pleasure to serve you my master, my lord, my grand warrior!"
Goro turned to face Hugo with crazy possessed eyes that only one who worshipped Satan could match.
"I hope his head doesn't start spinning around," Hugo thought, a fear he had one too many times in the company of this strange teen.
Right, this way," Goro started for the men's side of the bath.
Not that I, the author, would know where that is since they never show you in the game which side is which. Even so, Hugo followed taking the towel Goro held out for him as he entered the bath room. He went on to disrobe himself. He, oddly enough, did this very slowly, all the while being completely oblivious to Goro's staring.
Goro was practically drooling, never had he thought Hugo so sexy. Sure, he had fantasies of taking Hugo full on and, well, doing very naughty things to him. But this, this was mesmerizing. The small but hard muscles covering Hugo's body was enough to make Goro's short-shorts tight, and considering how tight they looked on him in the first place this situation had to be painful.
Hugo finally wrapped the towel around his waist before walking off toward the large bath. He smiled charmingly at Goro as he passed making boy blush profusely. Goro continued to stare as Hugo walked off. Oh, that sweet rump clad in only a thin layer of cloth. If only, if only, IF ONLY. oh, what the hell.
Goro bolted forward at Hugo who was just taking off the towel. He flung himself through the air and bashed into Hugo head-on causing the two to go reeling into the bath with a loud splash. It didn't take long for either boy to come sputtering to the surface of the steamy water.
"What was *cough* that for!?" Hugo yelled a little too loudly.
Goro looked at Hugo longingly. It was also quite notable that his cloths had mysteriously removed themselves and now lay next to Hugo's on the other side of the room. What? Don't look at me like that. If I weren't allowed to use plot holes then why would they exist, huh? HUH? That's what I thought.
"Oh! Hugo, take me now!"
Goro flung himself at Hugo who grabbed him, though only out of reflex.
"You. what?" Hugo asked uneasily.
"I want you to do very naughty things to me! Please, my master, my lord, my grand warrior!"
Hugo looked bewildered even more but decided to kick characterization out the window and smiled devilishly. Grabbing Goro in a possessive hug he kissed the other full on the lips. After sucking on Goro for a few he let go and looked lovingly into Goro's eyes.
"Anything for you."
"Oh, Hugo! Please, show me the dirty, naughty things you will do to me! Please! Please do!" Goro called out.
"Alright!" Hugo yelled as he pushed Goro against the side of the bath.
As you can guess Hugo proceeded to do those naughty, naughty things to Goro. What you didn't know.
"Wow, I knew Goro was trying to make the bathes more pleasurable but, damn!" Aila said as she and Viki peered through the curtain.
"Shhh, not so loud, they'll hear us," Viki scolded while holding a finger to her lips.
The two girls continued to watch soon sighing simultaneously.
"Ah, yaoi."
THE END
After Words: My god, this turned out longer than I had originally planned. But, I had fun. I had meant for it to be a bit shorter only because I had one scene in mind, the bath scene. But, all the other weird antics the other characters situated between Hugo and the bath were just too funny to give up. Oddly enough, I think this story actually had a plot. somewhere. Oh well, maybe I'll find it in the next chapter. That's right, I'm continuing this. What? I told you that in the disclaimer. Pay attention next time. Don't worry, the yaoi is only one half of each story. The other is silly Suikoden parody. Ah yes, do send feedback. Feedback make me a happy little fellow.
-TrekTournament