The next few days passed in a blur for Scully. She lost all track of time,
the division between night and day became obsolete Sleep was taken when and
where it consumed her. Skinner and Frohike poured over the results obtained
from a myriad of tests, and Byers and Langly were tasked with researching
the effects of drugs such as Phenatoin and Haldoperidol on abnormal brain
function. Scully tried to educate Doctor McQuade on the finer points of
alien/human hybrids and theories of extra terrestrial progenitors. Not
surprisingly, she was met with blank stares and brick walls. Mulder's
condition remained stable with activity in his parietal lobe continuing to
spike, but usually only when Scully was in the room. She reasoned that this
was due to that area of the brain being used primarily for cognitive
abilities and perception. She continued to hear his thoughts. She became
convinced he was aware of everything going on around him. What troubled her
the most was the doctor's insistence that he was not going to recover from
this unscathed and that his quality of life would be minimal. Scully heard
the words but refused to believe them no matter how many times it was
discussed. With each passing day the reality of the situation did start to
register and there was talk of next of kin and living wills.
"I can't believe I'm hearing this from you Sir,"
Scully said softly. Skinner had led Scully away from Mulder's bedside to the corridor outside.
"We have to consider all possible outcomes Dana," Skinner replied. "You are the witness to his living will. You know he doesn't want to live like this. I'm just being realistic."
"Aren't we getting a little ahead of ourselves here Sir? We still don't even know the full extent of his injury or how it will effect him in the long term. Surely he deserves..."
"Dana," Skinner interrupted. "He's still not breathing on his own, none of the drugs have had any effect, he may never come out of this coma. How long are you prepared to wait Agent Scully?"
Scully was surprised by the change in his tone and could no longer look him in the eyes as tears appeared in her own.
"As long as it takes Sir, I'm not ready to give up on him just yet."
She said as she turned back to the room, leaving Skinner alone in the hall.
He was dying, slowly, piece by piece, shutting down, and there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it. The latest test results showed steadily decreasing levels of activity in his brain more fitting for a man in a deep comatose state. Scully could no longer hear him, she no longer felt his presence in the room. Apparitions of his soul still visited her while she slept but they were weaker and more indistinct with every passing day. She could literally feel him slipping away from her.
"Agent Scully?"
Scully hadn't even noticed Doctor McQuade enter the room and his voice shook her from her reverie.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
"It's all right, I was miles away." she smiled. "You don't look like you're here to give me any good news."
"I wish I was..."
He sighed before continuing.
"Agent Mulder's condition has deteriorated to the extent that he now falls below the criteria specified on his living will."
"I know." she nodded. "I helped him set the criteria four years ago."
"Then you know what I'm going to say next."
Scully swallowed hard in vain attempt to remove the lump from her throat.
"Yes, I think I do."
"You have power of attorney, so the decision ultimately falls to you."
Scully closed her eyes and rubbed at her temples.
"I need some time."
"Of course,"
He said, as he backed away, almost reverently, out of the room.
"Take as much time as you need."
"No spirit has she now, no force, she neither hears nor sees. Rolled round within Earth's diurnal course with rocks and stones and trees."
This line from a Wordsworth poem had entered Scully's thoughts as she woke that morning from another fitful night of sleep on the chair in Mulder's room. She had studied the poem at school many years before and had never thought of it since. It described the death of a young girl called Lucy and this was the only part she could recall. She did remember the tragedy of it though, the sense of loss and wasted life. How, in the grand scheme of things, all life, in death,returns to the state from whence it came. Gas and matter. Scully's spirit was pervaded by an ever-increasing sense of despair and impending grief. With each passing moment Mulder's life force ebbed away. She leaned over him now and planted a gentle, lingering kiss on his forehead.
"You are my constant..."
She whispered as she stroked his hair. The door to Mulder's room opened slowly and the doctor stood at the threshold. She turned to him and her words came out shaky at first.
"I-I-I'm ready now... t-to decide...I'm ready to decide."
(((((((((())))))))))
PLEASE review!!!! :-D
"I can't believe I'm hearing this from you Sir,"
Scully said softly. Skinner had led Scully away from Mulder's bedside to the corridor outside.
"We have to consider all possible outcomes Dana," Skinner replied. "You are the witness to his living will. You know he doesn't want to live like this. I'm just being realistic."
"Aren't we getting a little ahead of ourselves here Sir? We still don't even know the full extent of his injury or how it will effect him in the long term. Surely he deserves..."
"Dana," Skinner interrupted. "He's still not breathing on his own, none of the drugs have had any effect, he may never come out of this coma. How long are you prepared to wait Agent Scully?"
Scully was surprised by the change in his tone and could no longer look him in the eyes as tears appeared in her own.
"As long as it takes Sir, I'm not ready to give up on him just yet."
She said as she turned back to the room, leaving Skinner alone in the hall.
He was dying, slowly, piece by piece, shutting down, and there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it. The latest test results showed steadily decreasing levels of activity in his brain more fitting for a man in a deep comatose state. Scully could no longer hear him, she no longer felt his presence in the room. Apparitions of his soul still visited her while she slept but they were weaker and more indistinct with every passing day. She could literally feel him slipping away from her.
"Agent Scully?"
Scully hadn't even noticed Doctor McQuade enter the room and his voice shook her from her reverie.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
"It's all right, I was miles away." she smiled. "You don't look like you're here to give me any good news."
"I wish I was..."
He sighed before continuing.
"Agent Mulder's condition has deteriorated to the extent that he now falls below the criteria specified on his living will."
"I know." she nodded. "I helped him set the criteria four years ago."
"Then you know what I'm going to say next."
Scully swallowed hard in vain attempt to remove the lump from her throat.
"Yes, I think I do."
"You have power of attorney, so the decision ultimately falls to you."
Scully closed her eyes and rubbed at her temples.
"I need some time."
"Of course,"
He said, as he backed away, almost reverently, out of the room.
"Take as much time as you need."
"No spirit has she now, no force, she neither hears nor sees. Rolled round within Earth's diurnal course with rocks and stones and trees."
This line from a Wordsworth poem had entered Scully's thoughts as she woke that morning from another fitful night of sleep on the chair in Mulder's room. She had studied the poem at school many years before and had never thought of it since. It described the death of a young girl called Lucy and this was the only part she could recall. She did remember the tragedy of it though, the sense of loss and wasted life. How, in the grand scheme of things, all life, in death,returns to the state from whence it came. Gas and matter. Scully's spirit was pervaded by an ever-increasing sense of despair and impending grief. With each passing moment Mulder's life force ebbed away. She leaned over him now and planted a gentle, lingering kiss on his forehead.
"You are my constant..."
She whispered as she stroked his hair. The door to Mulder's room opened slowly and the doctor stood at the threshold. She turned to him and her words came out shaky at first.
"I-I-I'm ready now... t-to decide...I'm ready to decide."
(((((((((())))))))))
PLEASE review!!!! :-D