AN-I can not believe I am writing a Harry Potter fanfiction. Not because I don't like Harry Potter, it is just that… I am SW fanfictioner.
If you have a problem with slash, don't read. Okay? This is a Remus/Sirius fic. This is a happy, for the most part, fic. It starts in the beginning of OOTP. Slightly AU.
PROLOGUE
Dear Harry,
I hope you are doing well. Your last letter concerned can't give you more. I am truly sorry. If I could I would. Harry rolled his eyes as he read that, even though he knew in his heart of hearts that Sirius would if he could in any way.
If it weren't for my solace moon I would be going insane. I am virtually under house arrest. So, I know what you are going through. The Moon has been shining beautifully. Keeping me entertained. Harry laughed as he read this. He knew that moon was Moony, and he was just encoding it. "I hope Sirius realizes how lucky he is, he has Remus with him." Harry had started calling Lupin, Remus or Harry since Sirius and Remus had started keeping in constant touch with him through Owl post. Speaking of owls, Hedwig landed on Harry's shoulder and affectionately nipped at his ear.
Harry went back to the letter.
It drives me crazy when Moon disappears, especially since I can't chase after it. Here, REM wants to write a note. Dear Bambi I hope you are doing well and not blaming yourself for events. You are a great kid, and your patience is something I admire daily. Not many grown wizards have the patience you do, Remus's portion began, it ended with, I love you so much. I hope you know that. Even if you were not what you are, I would still love you. Harry knew that Remus was referring to the fact that Harry was his best friend's son and love's godson. Your REM. Snuffles has more to say-Sirius's letter went on for another foot of parchment. It ended with. I love you too, P. Unlike what most people thought P did not stand for Potter, but Prongslet. Sirius called him Prongslet, and Remus, Bambi.
The momentary feeling of satisfaction that Harry had gotten from getting a letter from two of the few people he loved in the world evaporated as a he noticed something. "They still did not tell me why they are encoding things so much."
Still, Harry knew it wasn't Remus or Sirius's fault. If they could tell him why they were encoding the letters so carefully they could tell him the news. At least Padfoot and Moony were finding ways and time to write him decent sized letters that sympathized with his situation rather then Ron and Hermione who were just sending short letters filled with hints.
Before Harry could start writing a response though he caught the time. The Dursleys would be sitting down for the Muggle News soon, he had to rush if he was going to listen to it and see if Voldemort had tried anything yet. What should I try today. Harry thought, a bit sarcastically. Listening to the news with the Dursleys was not an option, they would just make snide comments at him. What about hiding in the bushes under the window.
Harry scurried outside to hide himself. None of the Dursleys could see him unless they popped their head out of the window….. (AN-You know what happens from here.)
Chapter 1-At Grimauld Place, his first morning. "I have been wanting to talk to the two of you in person for awhile." Harry said, excitedly, to Remus and Sirius as he sat down for breakfast with Ron, Hermione, the Weasleys, and various other order members.
Guessing what it was Harry wanted to speak to them about, Sirius urgently shook his head. Harry was puzzled, but was quiet. After breakfast, Sirius motioned for Harry to follow him.
Harry looked at Ron and Hermione, but luckily they were engaged in separate conversations, Ron with the twins and Hermione with Ginny. "What?" Harry asked. "I have been so excited! I want to know everything."
"First things first." Sirius said, "just wait until we get to our room."
"Our." Harry said, slyly.
"Yes." Sirius said, unblushingly even though he caught what it was Harry referred to, then he implored. "Hush."
"Ookay." Harry said, not sure what the reason for secrecy was. Remus and Sirius were in love! But surely everyone in the order… except maybe for The Git knew that. That wasn't the secret was it?
Still Harry complied with his godfather's wishes. He quietly followed Sirius to his room, and Harry saw that Remus was already there. "Okay, Prongslet," Sirius said without preamble, "here is the deal. No one, except for you, knows about us." He paused as he saw Remus looking at him. "Well, we suspect that Professor Dumbledore suspects that we are 'together'. We need to keep it this way."
"Why?" Harry asked puzzled.
"Bambi, we aren't sure how people are going to react. Same sex couples… well, they are not that normal, nor are they accepted widely." Remus said.
"Can I tell, Ron and Hermione."
Remus and Sirius exchanged a look. "Not now." Sirius said. "We don't want to chance anyone finding out."
Multiple emotions passed through Harry, sadness that he would be keeping a secret from his best friends, secret glee that he had also been sworn to secrecy so his friends could feel what he had had to.
Harry saw that Remus and Sirius were getting a little uncomfortable so he asked the question he had wanted to ask earlier. "How did you two realize you were in love."
Remus and Sirius exchanged wistful smiles. "Well, we had both known since 5th year that we preferred males. 6th year we had a ball, and well… when I saw padfoot walk in, I knew I could love no other.
"And when I saw Moony standing by the punch table… I knew I could love no other."
"Prongs noticed." Remus laughed at this memory, "he, in his usual fashion, brewed up some Veritaserum (AN- if they could become Animagi then they can brew up veritaserum) and got us to spill our guts."
"He said later he did it because he couldn't stand the eyes we were making at each other then pretending that we were not in love with each other." Sirius said, slightly laughing as he remembered.
That laugher soon turned to momentary tears as Sirius, Remus, and Harry remembered James. All three took comfort in the fact that they were sitting with people who could appreciate their pain.
"So… what should we plan to do?" Harry asked, wanting to spend some time with Moony and Padfoot.
"Well, Moony here has to go w-" Sirius trailed off as he caught Remus's warning glare, "do some order business." He corrected. "But I am sure Molly has some wonderful cleaning planned for us."
"Padfoot, Molly really isn't the one to blame."
"BUT SHE COULD MAKE MY LOT EASIER!!!" Sirius said, anger and hurt making him yell.
Moony recoiled a bit, and Sirius calmed down a bit. "I am sorry, Moony, you have done nothing but try and help. You have even put up with this pathetic excuse of a man." Sirius put his hands on his hips and turned away.
Remus thought for a moment how best to answer Sirius's self deprecation. "Don't you dare insult my taste in men. I fall in love with the best."
This got the result he had been wanting and Sirius smiled, albeit a bit. Moony leaned in and kissed Sirius. Sirius responded by putting his arms around Moony and kissing him back.
Then the two remembered the almost 15-year old in the room, the released each other and blushed deeply. Harry did not help matters by clapping loudly and whistling.
Fortunately for Remus and Sirius, Ron's voice called. "Mate, Harry, we are supposed to be cleaning downstairs. Sirius, if you are in there, wanna help?"
"We are coming." Harry said.
Remus eased himself into the closet to avoid being spotted when Sirius and Harry left. Harry shook his head at the precaution. Was it that abnormal for three friends to be in the same room. He resolved to ask them about it, but now was not the time.
Sirius and Harry left quickly. "What have you been up to, mate?" Ron asked. "I haven't seen you since breakfast."
"Sirius and I were just catching up." Harry said, glad that he wasn't lying even if he wasn't telling the entire truth.
"Wicked." Ron said, not begrudging him his relationship with Sirius. Ron smiled at his friend warmly, trying to emphasize that point. "Hermione is downstairs with mom and Ginny. They have already started. Fred and George should be on their way downstairs, I called them before you two."
"Cool." Harry said.
"All right, we need to tackle the Doxies." Molly said, handing each one a spray and a cloth, then she launched into an explanation of what one should do when the Doxies came out.
"Go." She directed. They each sprayed as many Doxies as they could for the hour. Harry wiped sweat off his forehead, it truly was hard work.
He got ready to spray the next one and get back to work, when Remus came down. "I am getting ready to leave, so I just wanted to say good-bye." Remus said, smiling apologetically for interrupting the work.
"I will be right back." Sirius said, gesturing almost imperceptibly to Harry.
"Yeah… me too." Harry said.
"Bye, Remus, take care of yourself. Come back alive." Harry had no illusions that the work Remus was going to do was dangerous.
"Ditto." Sirius said, his eyes bright with tears. "You have left so many times, but it never gets any easier. Knowing how much danger you are in…"
"Just remember, I love you. Being dead will not change that."
"Keep lookout." Sirius told Harry.
Harry rolled his eyes but did as he was asked, turned around and kept a watch to make sure no one came as Sirius and Remus kissed.
"I need to go." Remus said, pulling away. He put his hand on Sirius's shoulder. "Take care of yourself. Take care of Harry. Don't- Don't fly off the handle if something happens to me, okay?"
"I can promise the first two, not the last." Sirius said honestly, after a few minutes.
"Care for this nuthead for me, won't you." Remus asked Harry quietly.
"Always." Harry said, solemnly.
He shook his head; this was getting way too much for him. "I'll see you two… later."
"I will be back in a moment, Moony here does need to go." Sirius said.
Harry cleared his head as best he could and went back to cleaning out the Doxies. Hermione and Ron gave him sympathetic glances. "I really don't want to talk about it." Harry told them. "I just… can't deal with it right now. The uncertainty."
Ron looked like he was going to argue but Hermione put a hand on his arm. "We understand." She said.
After a moment Ron nodded as well. "Yeah, mate."
They worked in silence, Sirius came back as promised a few minutes later, the expression on his face dark and brooding. He didn't talk much at all that day, and everyone knew not to try and make him. Even Harry didn't try and make Sirius talk, instead he just put his arm on Sirius's shoulder every once and awhile. A silent gesture of trust in the fact that he knew Remus would come out alive, and care for Sirius.
"That is good for today." Mrs. Weasley said about 6 o'clock. "Go, have some fun." She said, giving Sirius a half-glance.
Just as she had feared Sirius opened his mouth to say a sarcastic remark, but before he did he looked at Harry and thought better of it. No one saw Mrs. Weasley breathe a sigh of relief. She really did not want to argue with Sirius right now. He was always so brusque when Remus was on guard duty.
"Exploding snap, anyone?" Ron asked.
"I would like a turn, if that is okay." Sirius said, surprising everyone for the second time in 10 minutes.
"Of course." Ron said.
So a raucous game of exploding snap ensued. Sirius found himself actually able to get carried away in it. So much so that he was shocked when Molly called for the children to go to bed.
"That was fun." Sirius said, sincerely.
Harry smiled at him, put an arm on his shoulder. "Good night, Sirius."
"'Night, Prongslet."
"Night Padfoot."
Sirius laughed. "Good night, Sirius." Hermione said.
"Good night." Ron said.
"Good night, Ron. Good night Hermione."
"Good night Ron. Harry." Hermione said as she left to go sleep in her and Ginny's room.
The next morning Harry woke before everyone else and went to Sirius's room, where he found, as he had suspected, that Sirius was already awake. "Come on in, Prongslet." Sirius said, gruffly.
"What, what are you doing." Harry asked gingerly.
"Waiting for Moony to contact me, he said he would if he could in the morning."
"Is that safe?" Harry asked.
"For a short contact, done properly, yes." Sirius said. "Your father and I used these mirrors as kids at school. Plus… the order has ways to contact each other. I told Moony to use the mirrors, less chance of anyone picking up on our conversations."
Harry was skeptical, "Professor Dumbledore would have come up with Order's contacting methods, wouldn't he have thought about Death Eaters picking up on the conversation…. Oh, but it isn't just Death Eaters Sirius doesn't want picking up on the conversation." Harry thought.
But Moony still had not called when Mrs. Weasley called them for breakfast. "You go, I am going to wait."
"I will wait with you."
"No, Molly will come up here looking for you. If she finds out what I am doing… she will yell at me for no end."
Harry knew that was true because he knew no matter what Sirius said, contacting Sirius was dangerous for Moony and whatever mission he was on.
"All right." Harry got up and went down to breakfast.
At breakfast he forced himself to try and be cheery and upbeat. But he knew he was failing, all of his thoughts were on Sirius upstairs and Moony who knew where.
"Harry, I thought we would tackle more doxies today." Mrs. Weasley said, after Harry finished as much breakfast as he could force down.
"Yeah… I will be down in a few minutes, there is something I need to do upstairs."
Harry almost bolted upstairs. The expression on Sirius's face told him that Moony had not contacted him yet. Harry sat down next to Sirius and held him. I am going after him." Sirius said.
"Sirius, you can't." Harry said, his heart filling with ice. He had known this was coming, but Sirius couldn't. The ministry was looking for him, he'd be caught and sent to Azkaban.
"Watch me." Sirius said, heading towards the door.
"Padfoot, think about Moony." Harry said, trying to reason with him some more. He really didn't want to have to call Mrs. Weasley.
Sirius paused, to Harry's relief. "Moony would not want you to go to Azkaban. Especially when you don't know… Remember my scar. If Voldemort had him, I would know."
Sirius sighed, and came back to his bed.
"I am so afraid." Sirius said, his voice breaking up. "I am just so afraid."
Harry let Sirius cry for a few moments. At that moment something on the bed called out "Sirius Black."
Sirius scrambled and picked up a little mirror. "Moony." He said, his facing shining with relief. "Are you okay."
"I am alive. I have to go back in. I love you. I don't know if I can contact you again until I start back." Remus said, speaking quickly.
"Love you too." Sirius said.
Remus and Sirius exchanged a smile, and then Remus was gone.