Okay, last chapter. Finally. This is the conclusion and essentially the epilogue. Thank you so much for the help you guys have given me. I love you guys soooo much, you have no idea how inspiring you are. And of course, thank you Molly, this is for you buddy.

My mind was whirling as I approached the gurney that Seth was lying on, waiting to be rolled into surgery. He was talking very enthusiastically with Summer and she was holding his hand. I slowly made my way to the opposite side. It appeared that he could feel my presence, because he looked away from Summer and at me and smiled that big, classic Cohen smile. And I smiled back, because it was impossible not to.

"Hey, bro," he said softly.

"Hey yourself." Out of the corner of my eye I saw Summer back away slowly and slip her hand out of Seth's, and I was thankful that she allowed us to have our moment. I stole a glance at her and grinned.

I sighed and gazed down at Seth. "You ready?"

He took a deep breath and nodded. "Yea. I better be, huh?" He smiled once again.

I looked him over, and saw his trembling hand holding onto his bed sheet. I slipped my hand under his, prying his fingers from the sheet, and squeezed his hand. He looked up at me like a little child who just got a new puppy.

"Everything will be okay," I told him.

He nodded. Then he looked down at our hands, and I almost didn't hear him whisper, "Thank you."

I grinned. My heart thumped so hard I heard my pulse in my ears. "No problem." I knew he was thanking me for being his friend, his brother, his partner in crime, his confidante, his rock…and I knew I was all these things for him, though in possibly more important ways, he was those things for me.

Then I leaned down close to his ear and said, for the first time I'd said it to another person in years, "Love you too."

Then he smiled, and squeezed my hand, and a tear rolled down his cheek. Then a nurse began rolling him away, and we held onto each other until our hands slipped apart at our finger tips. He smiled at me as he rolled through the doors. I backed away until I felt Sandy's hand on my back. I kept staring off at the door that Seth had disappeared through, and then I felt Kirsten's arm slip around my waist. Then I closed my eyes and, for the first time since I was a child, I prayed. To no one in particular, because I wasn't sure what I believed exactly, but I prayed, and then I thanked whoever was listening for giving me what I needed most: a family.

May 2005

Of all the things that Newport Beach had to offer, I sorely underrated the sight of the sparkling blue ocean. I wasn't really a beach kind of guy, but the water moving serenely over the soft warm sand was something I had grown to love over the two years I had lived in the town. There had been many laughs, and even more pain, but, as I gazed at the ocean, I found a place that was called home.

I smiled a little, feeling the pain of the last couple years become swallowed by the love and happiness that now lived inside of me. Then I glanced down at the red polyester gown lying on my bed. I laughed at the absurdity of the squared cardboard hat with the funny tassel, and slipped the gown on.

I inhaled the scent of brand-new polyester and I almost cried. It was a long road to get to this moment. A lot of pain, and struggling, and tears. I heard familiar giggling coming from my bathroom, and I smiled to myself.

"It won't lay flat!"

"So help me God, if you put that nasty crap in your beautiful hair, I will make you eat it!"

"It kinda looks like blue jell-o, so…"

"Hand me the gel, Cohen."

Summer and Seth appeared, arguing, with Summer trying to wrestle a tube of gel out of Seth's hand. Both were wearing red graduation gowns, Summer's hair perfectly styled into large ringlets. Seth was wearing the required collared shirt, with a bright orange tie with twinkies all over it, just to make it his own.

"Cohen!" Summer said in a tone of warning.

Seth sighed loudly, stomped his foot, and looked at me desperately. "Ryan, tell Summer I'm allowed to put whatever I want in MY OWN HAIR."

He looked pointedly at Summer. She glared and crossed her arms. I smiled, and said, "Oh, you're not dragging me into that, buddy. You're on your own."

Seth let out a pathetic whine and Summer smiled smugly. "Why can't I try to get my hair to lay flat? What is so wrong with that?"

"Because, Cohen, you have beautiful hair and you're very lucky to have it so if you put any foreign substance in it I will make you suffer so badly that you and your right hand will get very, very friendly."

I snorted out my laughter as Seth gave up and marched back into the bathroom to put away the gel. I glanced at Summer and saw her smiling wistfully to herself. I knew what she was thinking. Seth's hair had grown back EXACTLY as it had been before, and Summer couldn't have been happier.

Junior year had been a tough year, although, ironically, one of the best of my life. I made the first true friends I'd ever had, and I got an actual family. But Seth's leukemia had shaken all of us to our core. That was such a frightening time, watching him suffer and wondering if he would get better. I felt such inadequacy that I couldn't be the one to save him, only because of the fact that we weren't biologically brothers, but I was just happy that he was still around. I was just thankful that someone could save him, even though it wasn't me.

"Hey," I heard Marissa's soft voice as she came into the room. She put her arm around me and kissed me on the cheek. We had had our ups and downs, definitely, but we eventually realized that we had to let all the crappy circumstances fall by the wayside and work at a relationship. We learned that great piece of advice from none other than Seth Cohen.

After his bone marrow transplant one day, I was sitting on the floor in the living room playing Playstation with Seth, who was on the couch wrapped up with a blanket. Marissa had called and wanted to go out to a movie, just me and her. I turned her down of course, a little regretfully. After I returned from the kitchen and Seth and I resumed our game, he asked, "Who was that?"

"Marissa."

"Hm. Are you guys going out or something?"

"Nah."

"Why not?"

Game over. I looked up at him as my character died. "What do you mean?"

Seth sighed and put down his controller. "When was the last time you guys went out and did something, just the two of you?"

I scrunched my eyebrows and thought. It probably wasn't since before Seth got sick… "I don't know. It's okay though. I'd rather hang out with you tonight." I smiled, expecting this to satisfy Seth and make feel good.

Instead, he rolled his eyes. "Ryan, what have you been doing every day for the last few months? Hanging out with me," he answered for me. "You need to spend some time with Marissa, cuz, quite frankly bro, I'm getting a little sick of you."

I smiled. Yeah, I really did miss Marissa. But a strange feeling of guilt nagged at me. "But I really don't want to leave you here by yourself. Someone needs to keep you entertained."

"No worries, my dear brother." Seth held his hand out and closed his eyes for dramatic effect. "Once the Summer realizes that The Marissa is out frolicking and possibly getting sweaty with The Ryan, she will be over here cuddling and begging to get sweaty with me."

I stared at him. "Despite the fact that that all made perfect sense, you still worry me, you strange, strange, little boy."

Seth smiled and shrugged. "Well, I try."

Seth marched out of the bathroom in a huff, demanding, "Okay, are we ready to go, yet?"

Marissa, Summer, and I smiled. It was a miracle in itself that Seth was actually graduating with us, much less as Salutatorian. He almost had to repeat his junior year, but he worked hard to keep up. Plus, I think Dr. Kim has a soft spot for him.

I looked around me, at the smiles on my friends' faces.

"Yeah. I think we're ready."

The four of us had piled into Summer's car while the parents took their own separate vehicles. I think we all needed to spend that day with each other. Graduation was something to be shared with friends, making memories and trying to forget that our lives were about to change in a huge way.

"What the hell are we listening to?" Seth demanded from the front passenger seat, turning to look pointedly at me.

I hung my mouth open. "This is the Allman Brothers! You can't trash a classic."

Seth rolled his eyes and started flipping the dial. "Summer, what did I tell you about letting Ryan near the radio. Oh, my God! Perfect!" Seth laughed as we heard a peppy guitar riff coming out of the speakers. Seth turned it up, and I frowned. I heard a couple of moaning "ohs" from a remarkable yet distinctly pre-pubescent male voice, and Summer and Marissa laughed with Seth. It sounded familiar…

Oh. My. God.

Seth and Summer sang along in loud, out of tune voices.

You have so many relationships in this life

Only one or two will last.

You go through all the pain and strife

Then you turn your back and they're gone so fast.

 I couldn't help the grin from spreading on my face. I remembered this song. I remembered despising it, yet ultimately finding myself humming and tapping my foot every time I heard it.

So hold onto the ones who really care

In the end they'll be the only ones there.

When you get old and start losing your hair

I laughed at the last line they sang. Seth was bouncing in his seat and air drumming. Summer was caught in an uncontrollable fit of giggles, and Marissa was bobbing her head and yanking on my arm.

Can you tell me who will still care?

Seth looked back and me and grinned. It was infectious; an infectious smile, and an infectious song. A song that's, I was reluctant to say, not that bad.

I began to sing.

Mmmbop ba du ba dop

Ba du bop ba du ba dop ba

Du bop ba du ba dop ba du

Yeah, yeah,

Mmmbop…


When our class processed into the auditorium in alphabetical order, I was the first one seated. I was going to be the first person in my class to get my diploma.

I smiled when they called up to the stage the top ten GPAs. Marissa primly walked onto the stage and accepted her plaque, smiling sweetly at Dr. Kim as she shook her hand. Seth strutted onto the stage, almost tripping over the step and knocking over the table full of diplomas in the process. Regardless, Dr. Kim smiled and presented him with a plaque. Then they announced the Salutatorian and Valedictorian. Seth stayed onstage and stepped up to the podium. He cleared his throat, and presented our class with a classic crooked grin.

"Hey. Um, in case some of you don't know, I'm Seth Cohen. Hi."

I grinned. I couldn't believe someone would give Seth Cohen free reign to say whatever he wanted to in front of hundreds of people. How naïve.

"Um, not a lot of you really care what I have to say, I guess, but, well, you'll get over it."

Many of the graduates laughed, and Dr. Kim looked confused and a little alarmed.

"Not many of you people paid much attention to me over the last four…well, 13 years. But what I have to say isn't for you. It's for the people that matter, and I think you know who you are.

"I know that everyone has been saying this since we began our senior year, but our lives are changing. Leaving for college, not living at home, not being around the same people we've grown to know so well. I know that some of you are sad and nostalgic, and some of you can't wait to get the hell out of here."

More laughter, and more nasty looks from Dr. Kim.

"But the last few years, no matter what you think, pretty much defined who you're going to be. I know that even though I have the heart of the most beautiful girl in the world,"

I glanced over my shoulder and spotted Summer, a huge grin and tears on her face.

"I'm still going to play video games and read comic books to pass the time. And, I'm sorry Dad, but that football dream just isn't going to happen. And I know that, should something happen to Ryan Atwood, God forbid, the wife-beater industry would go down the toilet."

Seth paused, and he looked at me and laughed.

"The last couple years, for me, haven't been the easiest. But they've also been the best. I guess that's how most things in life are: hard and beautiful. If you make a ton of money and stay sexy and wrinkle-free, nobody really cares. So, I'm not going to tell you to 'climb every mountain and forge every stream.' If you don't wanna, who cares? I know I don't. Just look at all the things in your life and take them for what they really are. If you get fat, there's more of you to love. If you lose all your money and steal from all of your friends, remember that there's one friend who's willing to help you start your own restaurant, even though you kissed his wife."

A strange mix of gasps and laughter erupted from the audience. I looked at Marissa, only to find her grinning.

"And if you happen to get cancer, heck, buy a cool wig! And remember that you're not just fighting for your life for you, but that someone else counts on you to be there."

Seth glanced down at the podium, then back at me. I felt my eyes itch, but I gave him an encouraging smile and mouthed, "Thank you."

"Just remember that things will be okay. Unless your grandfather marries your foster brother's girlfriend's mother, making your new grandmother 2 years younger than your mom. In which case run, run away, as fast as you can."

We all laughed at that. Seth gave a quick nod and stumbled off the stage to his seat. I stretched my arm over the back of my chair and Seth clasped my hand. I squeezed his before we let go, and I turned back to listen to Maria Robinson, the valedictorian, give her speech.

"The future is limitless, with blue skies to soar, and mountains to climb…"

"I'm warning you, Cohen, leave your hair ALONE!"

"Summer-"

"I don't care! It's fine!"

Seth, Summer, Marissa, and I were piled up against a tree while our parents desperately tried to get us to stay still and pose for pictures. Summer and Seth were, of course, arguing.

"Seth," I said, "your hair really is fine, man."

I smiled as Seth stuck out his lower lip. Then he slung his arm around my shoulders and I slid my arm around Marissa's waist.

"Alright, guys, just one more," Sandy said and held up the camera. We all smiled and said "cheese," and I glanced across the lawn to the parking lot, and my smile fell.

When we were done taking pictures, I quietly excused myself and made my way to the parking lot. A few moments later, I stood facing my mother.

She gave me a shaky smile and I asked, "What are you doing here?"

She looked down at her feet, then said, "W-well, my son just graduated. I know I haven't seen you in a while, but…"

My mom looked up at me with tears in her eyes. "I wanted to let you know that I'm very proud of you."

I finally smiled, and she smiled back. "Thank you."

"It looks like you've been doing okay for yourself," she said and gestured over to Sandy, Kirsten, and Seth, who were arguing good-naturedly over something. "Theresa said something about your friend over there being sick. I hope he's okay."

I nodded. "Yeah, he's fine now, thanks."

An awkward silence followed, her looking off at the Cohen's and me looking at the ground. I only glanced up when she said, "Why don't you come with me back home, and we can celebrate…together."

I slowly shook my head, and said, "No, I can't. Seth and I were going to go over to Summer's for a while, then go home and play video games or watch movies or something. Just hang out."

Dawn looked confused and hurt. "Well, y-you can do that any other night. I want to spend some time with you. Why do you have to spend you graduation night playing video games with him?"

I looked over my shoulder at Seth, who was fussing with his hair and trying to get Kirsten to stop crying. I grinned and turned back to my mother.

"Because he's my brother."

I gave her a quick hug, a kiss on the cheek, and a good-bye. Then I started walking back to my family, following the sound of laughter.

Your eyes must do some rainin'

If you're ever gonna grow.

But when cryin don't help,

You can't compose yourself,

It's best to compose a poem.

An honest verse of longing, or a simple song of hope.

That's why I'm singin' baby don't worry

Cuz now I've got your back.

And every time you feel like cryin

I'm gonna try and make you laugh.

And if I can't

If it just hurts too bad,

Then we'll wait for it to pass.

And I will keep you company through those days so long and black.

And we'll just keep working on the problem

We know we'll never solve

Of Love's uneven remainders.

Our lives are fractions of a whole.

But if the world could remain within a frame

Like a painting on a wall.

Then I think we'd see the beauty.

Then we would stand staring in awe

At our still lives posed

Like a bowl of oranges,

Like a story told

By the fault lines, and the soil.

"Bowl of Oranges"

Bright Eyes

There ya have it. The longest story I've ever completed. I hope you guys like it, I love you all. Please review and I have another story planned. It's a one-shot and it's another Ryan-Seth centric story. And of course, "Mmmbop" is by Hanson, and yes, I'm very sorry but I've loved Hanson's music since I was eleven. I've accepted it, and I hope you do too.

I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Peace, Love, and Bullet-proof Marshmallows,

Beth