Part Two
I HATE THIS COMPUTER!! This is the fourth time I have had to write this chapter. Hmph. IDOIZJK.
"I will destroy that infernal Dib-monkey!!" Zim pounded his small fists on the keys of his computer, earning a disgruntled snort from the speakers. "How dare he humiliate Zim so!"
Kith sat in a chair somewhat behind him, carefully wielding a micro-sized blowtorch from her I.U.P, tinkering with a small flat device. Zim spun around, annoyed that he wasn't extracting the expected amount of sympathy.. "What is that? You've been working with it since you got here!"
Kith rubbed her dark lavender eyes and stood up. "It's the device I use for a disguise, a hologram transmitter. When Dib sprayed us with the water, it screwed up the internal wiring on it. " She was immediately knocked off her feet by Gir, who seemed to be engaged in a conversation with himself. He was emitting an awful screamy, laughy sound. ((A/N: For use in this story, I'm going to call this phenomenon 'scraffing,' okay?))
Kith cocked an eye at the SIR as she climbed to her feet. "Is it always so stoopid?"
From the computer came the sound of rapid typing, spaced fairly evenly by the computer muttering advice. Without turning around, Zim answered, "It's not stoopid, it's advanced!"
"Gee, I hope MY SIR doesn't ever become THAT advanced."
"Huh?"
From the base-to-kitchen elevator, Kith heard a high-pitched voice screaming about pizza. She laughed quietly to herself. "Yeah--advanced." Then she realized that Gir, the deranged one, was sitting quietly on the floor next to Zim, busy eating a bag of unpopped Poop-Korn. She winced and took a deep breath.
"Don't let it be MiKi, don't let it be MiKi, don't let it be MiKi--" she turned around and fell out of her chair. MiKi, the latest in Irkan SIR technology, was completely covered in bubble gum. What's more, she was stuffing a revolting looking Bloaty's pizza into her mouth. All of the black on her frame, the chest plate, joints, and eyes, had turned purple. Gir jumped up, and, spraying Poop-Korn from his mouth, tackled MiKi, demanding 'scraffily' that she share the pizza.
Kith stormed up to Zim, an interesting spectacle, seeing as how she was only tall enough to look at his chin. "What did you do to my SIR, insignificant excuse for an invader!?!" she screamed, startling the scuffling SIRs.
Zim finished typing in a string of numbers.
"I didn't do anything to her."
Kith looked at the computer and grimaced. "Computer, show any signs of data transference into my SIR."
"Hey! You aren't authorized to do that!"
"Stuff it, Zim."
The screen of the computer filled with the downloaded information. Gir walked up to stand beside the seething Kith. "I made a new friend!"
"You... you did what?"
"I made a friend!" Gir smiled stoopidly at Kith, oblivious to the danger he was placing himself in. Kith decided to vent her anger on Zim.
"Your incompetent SIR unit has utterly destroyed mine!!"
"I wasn't doing anything!! I was at skool with you all day!!" Zim frantacally defended himself. To have an assassin mad at him was not on his wish list.
"I love this show!"
Both Irkans looked over at Gir, sitting in front of the TV wall. Playing on about four of the screens was Mysterious Mysteries. The spokesman was telling everyone about tonight's feature.
"Tonight, we had nothing to show, so we decided to bring out some kid's surveillance cameras! Please welcome Dib, and his exclusive footage of aliens!"
Zim walked over to the TVs. On the screen Dib was grinning and waving to the audience, who seemed about as lackluster as old cheese. "Tonight," began Dib, "I have brought in some audio and video footage of two real live aliens, who have come to conquer Earth!"
Crickets chirped in the audience. Zim felt his blood run cold. Urgently he turned to Kith. "The Dib is going to get us killed! We have to go down and stop him! We'll take your Voot." He slipped into a dream sequence of himself lying on the government autopsy table.
"MY Voot?! What's wrong with your Voot?"
"I always wanted to drive an X-class...."
"((sigh)) Fine. Put your eyes in."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~At Mysterious Mysteries*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Really?" said the stoopid perky announcer guy. "And how many times have you effortlessly foiled this Zim's pots to destroy the planet?"
"Oh, about ten or twelve by now, I'd say," answered Dib airily.
"Well, that's just great. Hey, all you paranormal kids out there, we have some surprise guests that want to ask Dib some questions!"
Dib sat up and looked around frantically. "What?! No! Is one of them green?!"
Much to Dib's dismay, Zim and Kith came striding out through the curtains, waving hesitantly at the crowd. Kith smiled evilly at Dib and took a seat next to him.
"Hello...kids. My name is...Kit."
"And I am the mighty Z--"
"Jim," interrupted 'Kit.' "His name is Jim." She glared at Zim.
"Don't you see?!" cried Dib. "These are the aliens!! Except that one," and he pointed to Kit, "Has a much better disguise than Zim!"
The anchor leaned over the hold the microphone in front of Zim. "Why are you so hideously green?"
Zim tried to look innocent and sad. "It's a skin condition...."
"You don't all actually believe he's a real human, do you!?" Dib shrieked frantically. He leapt up, brandishing a pen. "I'll show you all!!" He ran toward Zim, yelling a war cry. Kith smirked and placed a nicely booted foot in his way--and poor Dib fell faster than a burnt-out Voot. Kith jumped down and sat on him, because Dib was still trying to attack Zim. It was a struggle for her though, seeing as how Dib had seven inches and several pounds on her. After a moment's thought, Zim jumped down and helped her, detaining him long enough for a stagehand to run and get Dib's personal straight-jacket, the one embroidered with a big 'D' on it.
Once Dib was adequately subdued, he calmly asked if someone would go and get his tape. "I'll show every last one of you that those two are really aliens!"
Kith jumped up and smiled sweetly. "I'd be glad to go and get it for you, Dib."
As she ran backstage, Dib frantically twisted around in his chair, trying to see where she went. "NOOOO!!! Don't let her get it!! Keep it away from her!! She's one of them; she'll ruin it!!" From backstage a dull thump could be heard, and a moment later Kith ran out with a tape.
"Is this it, Dib?" she asked, holding it up for him to see.
Dib frowned. It seemed to be the right tape, but that was no reason to trust an alien--let alone an alien assassin.
Grudgingly he nodded. She handed it to the anchor, who put it in the slot. Dib saw a flash of purple from the corner of his eye--when he turned around, the only purple things were Kith's eyes, looking calmly back at him. He shivered.
The video began to play, and Dib leaned forward expectantly.
However, he quickly decided that he'd rather watch anything besides this. He would die for this--painfully.
On the screen, Gaz was learning to walk. Dib remembered taking this video himself, so they could send it to Dad. She took a few tottering steps, and suddenly lost her balance. She toppled forward and hit a wall on the way down. Her face crumpled, and she looked about to cry. Instead of bawling like a normal child, though, she ripped the camera from Dib's grasp and smashed it on the floor.
Dib hung his head. The shame of having 6.3 million viewers see this would be nothing compared to what Gaz would do to him.
The audience erupted into laughter, and suddenly Dib had an idea. A terrible, awful, nasty idea--but it had to be done.
Sneakily he slid one arm out of the straightjacket, a trick perfected by use, and picked up the complementary glass of water studios provide. He took a sip and looked at Kith. She sat looking back at him, cold superiority in her eyes.
He made up his mind.
He spit.
The water arced on slow motion to Kith, terror dawning on her computerized face.
The water hit her--and she began to smoke and spark. In her pained flailing, she knocked Zim off his chair. Dib jumped up triumphantly, pointing at the alien that was beginning to show through the sparks of the hologram.
"DO YOU SEE!? I'M NOT CRAZY!! THEY'RE ALIENS!!"
The anchor was hopping around frantically, calling for the Alien Capture Team that was kept at the studio in case of situations like these. The ACTs began ushering people out of the studio, sealing off the exits as they went.
Zim sat up groggily, rubbing his eye were Kith had smacked him.
"Ohmygawd!!" squealed the anchor. "TWO aliens!"
Zim looked in the pitcher of water and saw Irkan eyes staring back at him. He smacked his forehead and groaned.
Dib tossed water on him too.
"Ahhh!! Dib-human, this is low, even for you!!" screeched the agonized Invader.
The ACTs began to surround the Irkans. Zim raised his voice as only he could and screamed, "GIIIR!!"
Dib walked to stand over him. "You look like you're gonna burst into flames, smoky!" he said gleefully. "I'd better pour some water on you!" And with that, he upended the entire pitcher on Zim's head.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~At Zim's base*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Gir picked up a card.
"Did you hear somethin'?" he asked MiKi.
"Mmmmnope."
"Okay. Go fish."
~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
One of the ACT members grabbed Kith.
"Get your hands off me, stinking piece of human filth!" she yelled. The human didn't comply, but instead grabbed her wrists. She bit his hand, but the human was so brain-dead he didn't react.
"Hehe. Not so tough now, eh, 'Kit'?"
She stopped snarling and looked at the speaker.
Dib was standing in front of her, lazily swinging a pair of cuffs. In one swift movement, he darted forward and clamped them down on her slender wrists. She struggled for a moment longer, but the cuffs took effect, and she blacked out.
Nearby, Zim saw one of the ACTs carrying a limp Kith away. He doubled his efforts.
Suddenly his green gooey blood ran cold.
Dib was kneeling down in front of him, a pair of cuff threateningly close for the Irkan's comfort.
"You won't succeed, pitiful human child!" spat Zim. "No one can hold an Irkan Invader against his will!"
Dib didn't answer, just gestured for one of the men to hold out Zim's hands. The man obeyed. With deliberate menace, Dib fastened the cuffs forcefully onto Zim's wrists.
The last thing Zim saw before he blacked out was Dib, slowly drawing a finger across his own throat.
Zim shuddered, and all went black.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A flash of light woke Zim. He struggled to sit up, but realized that his arms and legs were strapped down. A glaringly white light shone into his face, making the rest of the room impenetrable by sight.
A sinister laugh from over in the corner caused him to whip his head around. It sounded familiar....
"Dib! Show yourself, don't hide in the shadows!"
Slowly a small form in a trench coat sauntered up to the table. Smiling rather evilly, Dib took a seat next to his foe.
"Hm. I told you I'd see you on the autopsy table someday...and look! You get to watch your girlfriend die too! Unless she doesn't die from the operation...then you get to listen to her scream in pain!"
During this speech, Zim had been staring in disgust at Dib. "She's not my...my...girlfriend."
"Like it matters! Oh, but what does matter is that we're behind schedule. Ready, Zim?" and Dib picked up a knife.
Zim swallowed hard, determined not to show fear or pain.
That was forgotten as he felt the slice of the knife in his belly.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
"Zim, wake up!" Something poked his stomach.
"NOO!! My squeedily spooch!"
"Forget your stoopid spooch, Zim, we have bigger problems."
Zim sat up gasping. "I had the worst dream! I was on an autopsy table and...and...um...crap."
They were in a cage made with an electric wiring system that ran around the sides. It was dark, probably because there was a thick blanket draped over the bars.
From outside their prison Dib could be heard, speaking into a microphone.
"And here I have Zim's disguise; contacts and a wig. It's actually very sad. In disguise, Zim doesn't even have a nose or ears. Kith's disguise, I believe, is a hologram transmitter; it is entirely dependent on this chip." A murmur of interest is heard.
Kith turned to Zim. "Call your SIR. I'll call MiKi."
Microphones came out of her backpack implant. Zim's did the same.
"Gir!"
Back at the house, Gir slurped on a Diet Poop. "Yes, master?"
"You have to come get me immediately!"
"Okee dokey!"
Zim looked over at his fellow Invader, who had just finished calling her SIR.
"Ya know, if you just wore a physical disguise like me, we wouldn't be in this mess. Just thought I'd mention it."
"Shut up."
Outside, Dib could be heard again.
"And now, without further ado, my a present--aw, man, not you!" This last part was said as Gir and MiKi flew into the room, blowing out one wall in the process.
"Go away!" yelled Dib angrily.
"Okay."
"NO! Gir, get me out of here!"
"Okay."
"Go away!"
"Sure."
"Gir!"
"Comin'."
During this rather interesting debacle, MiKi's forearms turned into sub- machine plasma cannons and blew away the top of the cage. Kith's I.U.P. launched a small capsule into the air, which exploded over the audience and released a haze of smoke. Spider legs grew from her back and propelled her past Zim, Dib, and Gir, who couldn't decide where to go. She climbed the podium and snatched the disguises.
"Zim!"
He caught his and pulled it on. Kith activated hers and MiKi's.
The smoke cleared. All of the members in the audience were sitting quietly still, although Dib was alone on stage. "Zim! You can't run! I'll find you again, just you wait!" A cricket chirped in the audience. Someone whispered loudly, "He's talkin' to himself again...."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------
Kith and Zim walked quickly out of the Swollen Eyeballs foyer and into the harsh light of the harsh light of the sun. As soon as they were a good distance away, Zim turned to Gir. "Why didn't you come, Gir?!" he shrieked indignantly.
The little SIR tilted his head. "We were plain' cards!"
Zim's jaw dropped. "Cards?"
"Mmmyep. I didn't win."
MiKi nodded and held up a squeaky pig. "Look what I won!"
Zim smacked his head. "Grrrr...."
"Yes master?"
"Not Gir, grrrr!"
"Yes, my lord!"
"Sheesh...."
"You know, " ventured Kith thoughtfully, "This may be just the right time to strike a finishing blow against Dib, and send him in pieces to a crazy house."
"Gaz buys him season passes to that place."
"I have just the plan!" cried Kith suddenly. "But we'll need some rope, a pie, and a credit card." She leaned in to explain her plan to Zim.
His faceted ruby eyes gleamed as he nodded appreciatively. "Yes...That'll work...I--what? Oh, yes...I see...."
He threw back his head and laughed maniacally.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA((gag, choke))AHAHAHAHAHA!! Victory will be sweet, Dib!!"
Well, it took longer...but it's done! Please review!
I HATE THIS COMPUTER!! This is the fourth time I have had to write this chapter. Hmph. IDOIZJK.
"I will destroy that infernal Dib-monkey!!" Zim pounded his small fists on the keys of his computer, earning a disgruntled snort from the speakers. "How dare he humiliate Zim so!"
Kith sat in a chair somewhat behind him, carefully wielding a micro-sized blowtorch from her I.U.P, tinkering with a small flat device. Zim spun around, annoyed that he wasn't extracting the expected amount of sympathy.. "What is that? You've been working with it since you got here!"
Kith rubbed her dark lavender eyes and stood up. "It's the device I use for a disguise, a hologram transmitter. When Dib sprayed us with the water, it screwed up the internal wiring on it. " She was immediately knocked off her feet by Gir, who seemed to be engaged in a conversation with himself. He was emitting an awful screamy, laughy sound. ((A/N: For use in this story, I'm going to call this phenomenon 'scraffing,' okay?))
Kith cocked an eye at the SIR as she climbed to her feet. "Is it always so stoopid?"
From the computer came the sound of rapid typing, spaced fairly evenly by the computer muttering advice. Without turning around, Zim answered, "It's not stoopid, it's advanced!"
"Gee, I hope MY SIR doesn't ever become THAT advanced."
"Huh?"
From the base-to-kitchen elevator, Kith heard a high-pitched voice screaming about pizza. She laughed quietly to herself. "Yeah--advanced." Then she realized that Gir, the deranged one, was sitting quietly on the floor next to Zim, busy eating a bag of unpopped Poop-Korn. She winced and took a deep breath.
"Don't let it be MiKi, don't let it be MiKi, don't let it be MiKi--" she turned around and fell out of her chair. MiKi, the latest in Irkan SIR technology, was completely covered in bubble gum. What's more, she was stuffing a revolting looking Bloaty's pizza into her mouth. All of the black on her frame, the chest plate, joints, and eyes, had turned purple. Gir jumped up, and, spraying Poop-Korn from his mouth, tackled MiKi, demanding 'scraffily' that she share the pizza.
Kith stormed up to Zim, an interesting spectacle, seeing as how she was only tall enough to look at his chin. "What did you do to my SIR, insignificant excuse for an invader!?!" she screamed, startling the scuffling SIRs.
Zim finished typing in a string of numbers.
"I didn't do anything to her."
Kith looked at the computer and grimaced. "Computer, show any signs of data transference into my SIR."
"Hey! You aren't authorized to do that!"
"Stuff it, Zim."
The screen of the computer filled with the downloaded information. Gir walked up to stand beside the seething Kith. "I made a new friend!"
"You... you did what?"
"I made a friend!" Gir smiled stoopidly at Kith, oblivious to the danger he was placing himself in. Kith decided to vent her anger on Zim.
"Your incompetent SIR unit has utterly destroyed mine!!"
"I wasn't doing anything!! I was at skool with you all day!!" Zim frantacally defended himself. To have an assassin mad at him was not on his wish list.
"I love this show!"
Both Irkans looked over at Gir, sitting in front of the TV wall. Playing on about four of the screens was Mysterious Mysteries. The spokesman was telling everyone about tonight's feature.
"Tonight, we had nothing to show, so we decided to bring out some kid's surveillance cameras! Please welcome Dib, and his exclusive footage of aliens!"
Zim walked over to the TVs. On the screen Dib was grinning and waving to the audience, who seemed about as lackluster as old cheese. "Tonight," began Dib, "I have brought in some audio and video footage of two real live aliens, who have come to conquer Earth!"
Crickets chirped in the audience. Zim felt his blood run cold. Urgently he turned to Kith. "The Dib is going to get us killed! We have to go down and stop him! We'll take your Voot." He slipped into a dream sequence of himself lying on the government autopsy table.
"MY Voot?! What's wrong with your Voot?"
"I always wanted to drive an X-class...."
"((sigh)) Fine. Put your eyes in."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~At Mysterious Mysteries*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Really?" said the stoopid perky announcer guy. "And how many times have you effortlessly foiled this Zim's pots to destroy the planet?"
"Oh, about ten or twelve by now, I'd say," answered Dib airily.
"Well, that's just great. Hey, all you paranormal kids out there, we have some surprise guests that want to ask Dib some questions!"
Dib sat up and looked around frantically. "What?! No! Is one of them green?!"
Much to Dib's dismay, Zim and Kith came striding out through the curtains, waving hesitantly at the crowd. Kith smiled evilly at Dib and took a seat next to him.
"Hello...kids. My name is...Kit."
"And I am the mighty Z--"
"Jim," interrupted 'Kit.' "His name is Jim." She glared at Zim.
"Don't you see?!" cried Dib. "These are the aliens!! Except that one," and he pointed to Kit, "Has a much better disguise than Zim!"
The anchor leaned over the hold the microphone in front of Zim. "Why are you so hideously green?"
Zim tried to look innocent and sad. "It's a skin condition...."
"You don't all actually believe he's a real human, do you!?" Dib shrieked frantically. He leapt up, brandishing a pen. "I'll show you all!!" He ran toward Zim, yelling a war cry. Kith smirked and placed a nicely booted foot in his way--and poor Dib fell faster than a burnt-out Voot. Kith jumped down and sat on him, because Dib was still trying to attack Zim. It was a struggle for her though, seeing as how Dib had seven inches and several pounds on her. After a moment's thought, Zim jumped down and helped her, detaining him long enough for a stagehand to run and get Dib's personal straight-jacket, the one embroidered with a big 'D' on it.
Once Dib was adequately subdued, he calmly asked if someone would go and get his tape. "I'll show every last one of you that those two are really aliens!"
Kith jumped up and smiled sweetly. "I'd be glad to go and get it for you, Dib."
As she ran backstage, Dib frantically twisted around in his chair, trying to see where she went. "NOOOO!!! Don't let her get it!! Keep it away from her!! She's one of them; she'll ruin it!!" From backstage a dull thump could be heard, and a moment later Kith ran out with a tape.
"Is this it, Dib?" she asked, holding it up for him to see.
Dib frowned. It seemed to be the right tape, but that was no reason to trust an alien--let alone an alien assassin.
Grudgingly he nodded. She handed it to the anchor, who put it in the slot. Dib saw a flash of purple from the corner of his eye--when he turned around, the only purple things were Kith's eyes, looking calmly back at him. He shivered.
The video began to play, and Dib leaned forward expectantly.
However, he quickly decided that he'd rather watch anything besides this. He would die for this--painfully.
On the screen, Gaz was learning to walk. Dib remembered taking this video himself, so they could send it to Dad. She took a few tottering steps, and suddenly lost her balance. She toppled forward and hit a wall on the way down. Her face crumpled, and she looked about to cry. Instead of bawling like a normal child, though, she ripped the camera from Dib's grasp and smashed it on the floor.
Dib hung his head. The shame of having 6.3 million viewers see this would be nothing compared to what Gaz would do to him.
The audience erupted into laughter, and suddenly Dib had an idea. A terrible, awful, nasty idea--but it had to be done.
Sneakily he slid one arm out of the straightjacket, a trick perfected by use, and picked up the complementary glass of water studios provide. He took a sip and looked at Kith. She sat looking back at him, cold superiority in her eyes.
He made up his mind.
He spit.
The water arced on slow motion to Kith, terror dawning on her computerized face.
The water hit her--and she began to smoke and spark. In her pained flailing, she knocked Zim off his chair. Dib jumped up triumphantly, pointing at the alien that was beginning to show through the sparks of the hologram.
"DO YOU SEE!? I'M NOT CRAZY!! THEY'RE ALIENS!!"
The anchor was hopping around frantically, calling for the Alien Capture Team that was kept at the studio in case of situations like these. The ACTs began ushering people out of the studio, sealing off the exits as they went.
Zim sat up groggily, rubbing his eye were Kith had smacked him.
"Ohmygawd!!" squealed the anchor. "TWO aliens!"
Zim looked in the pitcher of water and saw Irkan eyes staring back at him. He smacked his forehead and groaned.
Dib tossed water on him too.
"Ahhh!! Dib-human, this is low, even for you!!" screeched the agonized Invader.
The ACTs began to surround the Irkans. Zim raised his voice as only he could and screamed, "GIIIR!!"
Dib walked to stand over him. "You look like you're gonna burst into flames, smoky!" he said gleefully. "I'd better pour some water on you!" And with that, he upended the entire pitcher on Zim's head.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~At Zim's base*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Gir picked up a card.
"Did you hear somethin'?" he asked MiKi.
"Mmmmnope."
"Okay. Go fish."
~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
One of the ACT members grabbed Kith.
"Get your hands off me, stinking piece of human filth!" she yelled. The human didn't comply, but instead grabbed her wrists. She bit his hand, but the human was so brain-dead he didn't react.
"Hehe. Not so tough now, eh, 'Kit'?"
She stopped snarling and looked at the speaker.
Dib was standing in front of her, lazily swinging a pair of cuffs. In one swift movement, he darted forward and clamped them down on her slender wrists. She struggled for a moment longer, but the cuffs took effect, and she blacked out.
Nearby, Zim saw one of the ACTs carrying a limp Kith away. He doubled his efforts.
Suddenly his green gooey blood ran cold.
Dib was kneeling down in front of him, a pair of cuff threateningly close for the Irkan's comfort.
"You won't succeed, pitiful human child!" spat Zim. "No one can hold an Irkan Invader against his will!"
Dib didn't answer, just gestured for one of the men to hold out Zim's hands. The man obeyed. With deliberate menace, Dib fastened the cuffs forcefully onto Zim's wrists.
The last thing Zim saw before he blacked out was Dib, slowly drawing a finger across his own throat.
Zim shuddered, and all went black.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A flash of light woke Zim. He struggled to sit up, but realized that his arms and legs were strapped down. A glaringly white light shone into his face, making the rest of the room impenetrable by sight.
A sinister laugh from over in the corner caused him to whip his head around. It sounded familiar....
"Dib! Show yourself, don't hide in the shadows!"
Slowly a small form in a trench coat sauntered up to the table. Smiling rather evilly, Dib took a seat next to his foe.
"Hm. I told you I'd see you on the autopsy table someday...and look! You get to watch your girlfriend die too! Unless she doesn't die from the operation...then you get to listen to her scream in pain!"
During this speech, Zim had been staring in disgust at Dib. "She's not my...my...girlfriend."
"Like it matters! Oh, but what does matter is that we're behind schedule. Ready, Zim?" and Dib picked up a knife.
Zim swallowed hard, determined not to show fear or pain.
That was forgotten as he felt the slice of the knife in his belly.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
"Zim, wake up!" Something poked his stomach.
"NOO!! My squeedily spooch!"
"Forget your stoopid spooch, Zim, we have bigger problems."
Zim sat up gasping. "I had the worst dream! I was on an autopsy table and...and...um...crap."
They were in a cage made with an electric wiring system that ran around the sides. It was dark, probably because there was a thick blanket draped over the bars.
From outside their prison Dib could be heard, speaking into a microphone.
"And here I have Zim's disguise; contacts and a wig. It's actually very sad. In disguise, Zim doesn't even have a nose or ears. Kith's disguise, I believe, is a hologram transmitter; it is entirely dependent on this chip." A murmur of interest is heard.
Kith turned to Zim. "Call your SIR. I'll call MiKi."
Microphones came out of her backpack implant. Zim's did the same.
"Gir!"
Back at the house, Gir slurped on a Diet Poop. "Yes, master?"
"You have to come get me immediately!"
"Okee dokey!"
Zim looked over at his fellow Invader, who had just finished calling her SIR.
"Ya know, if you just wore a physical disguise like me, we wouldn't be in this mess. Just thought I'd mention it."
"Shut up."
Outside, Dib could be heard again.
"And now, without further ado, my a present--aw, man, not you!" This last part was said as Gir and MiKi flew into the room, blowing out one wall in the process.
"Go away!" yelled Dib angrily.
"Okay."
"NO! Gir, get me out of here!"
"Okay."
"Go away!"
"Sure."
"Gir!"
"Comin'."
During this rather interesting debacle, MiKi's forearms turned into sub- machine plasma cannons and blew away the top of the cage. Kith's I.U.P. launched a small capsule into the air, which exploded over the audience and released a haze of smoke. Spider legs grew from her back and propelled her past Zim, Dib, and Gir, who couldn't decide where to go. She climbed the podium and snatched the disguises.
"Zim!"
He caught his and pulled it on. Kith activated hers and MiKi's.
The smoke cleared. All of the members in the audience were sitting quietly still, although Dib was alone on stage. "Zim! You can't run! I'll find you again, just you wait!" A cricket chirped in the audience. Someone whispered loudly, "He's talkin' to himself again...."
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Kith and Zim walked quickly out of the Swollen Eyeballs foyer and into the harsh light of the harsh light of the sun. As soon as they were a good distance away, Zim turned to Gir. "Why didn't you come, Gir?!" he shrieked indignantly.
The little SIR tilted his head. "We were plain' cards!"
Zim's jaw dropped. "Cards?"
"Mmmyep. I didn't win."
MiKi nodded and held up a squeaky pig. "Look what I won!"
Zim smacked his head. "Grrrr...."
"Yes master?"
"Not Gir, grrrr!"
"Yes, my lord!"
"Sheesh...."
"You know, " ventured Kith thoughtfully, "This may be just the right time to strike a finishing blow against Dib, and send him in pieces to a crazy house."
"Gaz buys him season passes to that place."
"I have just the plan!" cried Kith suddenly. "But we'll need some rope, a pie, and a credit card." She leaned in to explain her plan to Zim.
His faceted ruby eyes gleamed as he nodded appreciatively. "Yes...That'll work...I--what? Oh, yes...I see...."
He threw back his head and laughed maniacally.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA((gag, choke))AHAHAHAHAHA!! Victory will be sweet, Dib!!"
Well, it took longer...but it's done! Please review!