Disclaimer: Hey hi, yep this fic is actually a requested one...Imagine that , so here goes the legalities...I don't own any characters or rights to Sailor Moon and Co... Depending on how well it does, I'll see about continuing it...So far it's just an 1 shot deal... Internal struggle of three souls--Horaru, Sailor Saturn, and Mistress Nine
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Three Souls
by Rogue Ronin
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Hotaru's Turmoil:...
Do you know what it's like to have two people living inside of you? One person craves for nothing but darkness, power, and despair. The cravings hit her so hard that it drives her mad. She craves it so much that she'll do whatever it takes to get it, no matter what the cost. At times I can feel her cravings. I cringe, I can't believe that I feel those same urges as her. It scares me, and I think that she knows it.
While the other already has the power, but is alone. All she wants is to be accepted, to have friends. But when she tries, all she sees is the fear and the anger that's so clear in their eyes. So she believes she's destined to be forever alone. So with her I can relate to some degree, she and I are somewhat the same. We both are alone, but for entirely different reasons, or are they?
Now, imagine me, a little girl, barely even a teenager. Day in and day out, constantly struggling against the two that are in my mind. I'm tired of the never ending struggle. I just want to be me! But then I ask myself, who am I? Am I the one that will do anything for what I want? Or am I the one that is destined to be alone?
When I'm in my room, I can hear them arguing, fighting each other. My head swirls into confusion, but that's not the worst of it. The worst is when my heart feels like it's being pulled into an emotional tug-of-war, and someday it'll pull apart. I'm not well enough as it is, now I also have these two fighting it out inside. I'm constantly fighting, but I also wonder, how much longer will I be able to hold up?
Why? Why out of all the people, why did it have to be me? What makes me so different from anyone else? Why was I chosen? Someone, anyone, please make it stop! I don't want to hurt like this any more. Someone make them go away...Just go away!
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Confession of Mistress Nine...
The darkness covers me like a second skin. Its coldness seeps through me, deep into the very core of my being. I can feel the power of darkness surge through my veins. I've tasted a sample of this power once before, ever since then, I've hungered for more.
My craving for power increases with every pure heart that I take. As I collect them, I reach into their chest and in slow and torturous agony, I pull out their pure hearts. I can feel their adrenaline run as they try to fight, but they know it's no use. I watch in pure satisfaction the life in my victims eyes slowly become dim and lifeless.
Even though I'm one of the two that for now, only live in the girl's head. I can see what she sees through her eyes. I experience everything that she does. In a way, it seems real to me, but at the same time it's only an illusion. Because they are her experiences, while I'm here, stuck inside of her mind. If things go as planned, I won't be the one that will be trapped in a human-like prison.
I prey upon her dreams, slowly turning them into nightmares. My haunting voice echoes in her head, as her fear chills her heart. The longer that I'm in here, the darker her spirit becomes. I can feel her darkness calling out to me. She tries and fights me and the darkness that resides in her, but I know that one day she'll cave, and when that day comes, I'll be ready.
She knows that we're here, but one day, I'll take over this vessel. When that day comes, all the living mortals will embrace the darkness, and they'll in turn serve me and my master willingly.
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Sailor Saturn's Reality...
If I had but one wish, just one, it would be to never be alone. But I know that I'll never get my wish. It's because of who I am and the role that I portray. My role, basically, I'm a destroyer. I destroy lives and worlds, deep down, I don't want to, but destiny gave me no choice. I wasn't asked if I wanted to do this, it was just given to me with no real explanation. So ever since then, I've started to become cold, uncaring, but recently, for some odd reason, I started to actually care. Was it because I actually found out that people do really care about me. So now I want to more than ever to cast it away, but I know that's not possible. So, I'm forced to play the part of the destroyer over and over again.
Everytime that people look at me, I look back at them and only see anger, and fear in their eyes. Anger, because of all the worlds and lives that I've needlessly taken.
Fear, because of the power that I hold inside. I guess I'd be angry and fearful too, if someone came out of nowhere and just decided to destroy everything in sight.
But it's like I said, I had no choice, at times I find myself cursing destiny. Why did it have to be so cruel? How could it just give someone so much power, and just let them destroy? Doesn't destiny have a heart, a soul?
With this power that I carry inside. I also carry a heavy price. When my power is called up, It's to be an all-or-nothing opportunity. I have to give it everything that I have, every ounce of my being. But once I take my shot, my life is extinguished. My presence may be masked from the one that I'm reborn into, but I'm still aware of her life and what's going on around her. So, I'm trapped between a choice to either use my power and die, or to be reborn in another and never be my own person.
It's not fair! What did I do to deserve this fate? Please, someone tell me what I could have done that was so bad. Who was the one that decided what my life was going to be? Well, at least I can be thankful for this much. I don't have to pass on this so called cursed life, it'll just stay with me. No one else has to carry this burden, maybe that's why I'm destined to be alone. It's the only reason that comes to my mind. But would it be so bad just to be a normal girl? I guess that I'll never know.
================================================================
Three Souls
by Rogue Ronin
================================================================
Hotaru's Turmoil:...
Do you know what it's like to have two people living inside of you? One person craves for nothing but darkness, power, and despair. The cravings hit her so hard that it drives her mad. She craves it so much that she'll do whatever it takes to get it, no matter what the cost. At times I can feel her cravings. I cringe, I can't believe that I feel those same urges as her. It scares me, and I think that she knows it.
While the other already has the power, but is alone. All she wants is to be accepted, to have friends. But when she tries, all she sees is the fear and the anger that's so clear in their eyes. So she believes she's destined to be forever alone. So with her I can relate to some degree, she and I are somewhat the same. We both are alone, but for entirely different reasons, or are they?
Now, imagine me, a little girl, barely even a teenager. Day in and day out, constantly struggling against the two that are in my mind. I'm tired of the never ending struggle. I just want to be me! But then I ask myself, who am I? Am I the one that will do anything for what I want? Or am I the one that is destined to be alone?
When I'm in my room, I can hear them arguing, fighting each other. My head swirls into confusion, but that's not the worst of it. The worst is when my heart feels like it's being pulled into an emotional tug-of-war, and someday it'll pull apart. I'm not well enough as it is, now I also have these two fighting it out inside. I'm constantly fighting, but I also wonder, how much longer will I be able to hold up?
Why? Why out of all the people, why did it have to be me? What makes me so different from anyone else? Why was I chosen? Someone, anyone, please make it stop! I don't want to hurt like this any more. Someone make them go away...Just go away!
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Confession of Mistress Nine...
The darkness covers me like a second skin. Its coldness seeps through me, deep into the very core of my being. I can feel the power of darkness surge through my veins. I've tasted a sample of this power once before, ever since then, I've hungered for more.
My craving for power increases with every pure heart that I take. As I collect them, I reach into their chest and in slow and torturous agony, I pull out their pure hearts. I can feel their adrenaline run as they try to fight, but they know it's no use. I watch in pure satisfaction the life in my victims eyes slowly become dim and lifeless.
Even though I'm one of the two that for now, only live in the girl's head. I can see what she sees through her eyes. I experience everything that she does. In a way, it seems real to me, but at the same time it's only an illusion. Because they are her experiences, while I'm here, stuck inside of her mind. If things go as planned, I won't be the one that will be trapped in a human-like prison.
I prey upon her dreams, slowly turning them into nightmares. My haunting voice echoes in her head, as her fear chills her heart. The longer that I'm in here, the darker her spirit becomes. I can feel her darkness calling out to me. She tries and fights me and the darkness that resides in her, but I know that one day she'll cave, and when that day comes, I'll be ready.
She knows that we're here, but one day, I'll take over this vessel. When that day comes, all the living mortals will embrace the darkness, and they'll in turn serve me and my master willingly.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sailor Saturn's Reality...
If I had but one wish, just one, it would be to never be alone. But I know that I'll never get my wish. It's because of who I am and the role that I portray. My role, basically, I'm a destroyer. I destroy lives and worlds, deep down, I don't want to, but destiny gave me no choice. I wasn't asked if I wanted to do this, it was just given to me with no real explanation. So ever since then, I've started to become cold, uncaring, but recently, for some odd reason, I started to actually care. Was it because I actually found out that people do really care about me. So now I want to more than ever to cast it away, but I know that's not possible. So, I'm forced to play the part of the destroyer over and over again.
Everytime that people look at me, I look back at them and only see anger, and fear in their eyes. Anger, because of all the worlds and lives that I've needlessly taken.
Fear, because of the power that I hold inside. I guess I'd be angry and fearful too, if someone came out of nowhere and just decided to destroy everything in sight.
But it's like I said, I had no choice, at times I find myself cursing destiny. Why did it have to be so cruel? How could it just give someone so much power, and just let them destroy? Doesn't destiny have a heart, a soul?
With this power that I carry inside. I also carry a heavy price. When my power is called up, It's to be an all-or-nothing opportunity. I have to give it everything that I have, every ounce of my being. But once I take my shot, my life is extinguished. My presence may be masked from the one that I'm reborn into, but I'm still aware of her life and what's going on around her. So, I'm trapped between a choice to either use my power and die, or to be reborn in another and never be my own person.
It's not fair! What did I do to deserve this fate? Please, someone tell me what I could have done that was so bad. Who was the one that decided what my life was going to be? Well, at least I can be thankful for this much. I don't have to pass on this so called cursed life, it'll just stay with me. No one else has to carry this burden, maybe that's why I'm destined to be alone. It's the only reason that comes to my mind. But would it be so bad just to be a normal girl? I guess that I'll never know.