AN: I own nothing. Absolutely nothing. Any references to any person, living or dead, or any other thing, is purely coincidental. Refer to comment #1 for further information. Characters OOC. Enjoy.

"Miss Victoria? Miss Victoria?"

"Hey, Police Girl!" said a loud, sarcastic voice. "Wakie, wakie!" she was roughly shaken.

"Hey!" she protested weakly. "I'm awake, I'm awake already!" Holding her pounding head she looked up into the anxious face of Walter and the grinning face of Alucard.

"Good evening!" said Walter, relieved. "I wasn't sure you were going to wake up!"

Seras moaned. "My head really hurts."

"Well, you were caught up in that blast. You've been asleep for several hours. We couldn't revive you." Walter wiped his brow. "But since you're awake, I have something to tell you. A message from Sir Integra. The computer you ordered on eBay has arrived."

"Yay!" Seras squealed excitedly. Walter and Alucard winced.

"We had it delivered to your room." Walter bowed and left. Alucard rose through the ceiling.

Seras got up and walked across the room to her new computer. Looking through the manuals, she decided it was easy enough to set up and set about doing so.

Several hours later, she had actually finished. Quite pleased with herself, she double-clicked on the internet icon and logged in. Hi-Speed seemed to work well on the system, so she stuck with it.

Looking around for places of interest, she had a small bubble pop up on her screen: it was an invitation to a chat room. Puzzled, she clicked "OK" and was whisked away to another screen. It was black with red, bold lettering. At the top it said:

WELCOME TO THE CRYPT OF DEATH -- A HELLSING CHATROOM

"Crypt of Death…Hellsing…chat room?" she was puzzled. She scrolled upwards and looked at the history of people.

Joecool! Says: hey, who's the new one?

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: just someone I pulled off and told to come in. newbies are always fun.

Ripperjack says: hey, yeah

Joecool! Says: so what's your name, new guy/girl?

Seras wasn't sure what to do. Then she saw the 'enter' block at the bottom, and decided to join the chat.

Policegirl says: I'm Victoria.

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: hey cool, just like our favourite vampire from Hellsing!

Joecool! Says: yah our fave vampire is defiantly Seras.

Ripperjack says: no way its not

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: then who?

Ripperjack says: RIP VAN WINKLE!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Joecool! Says: ur sick, man.

"They know about Hellsing? Alucard…me? What is going on here?"

Policegirl says: so how did you find out about Hellsing?

Joecool! Says: OMG, what do you mean?

Policegirl says: I mean, where did you first hear the word?

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: we've been fans of the show for years, ever since it came out

Ripperjack says: and now that its out in book form we're all grabbing for copies!

Joecool! Says: long live Hellsing!

Show? Book form? What were they talking about? Seras didn't know, but she wasn't about to ask for fear of being really put-down. So she played along.

Policegirl says: so what's ur fave episode?

Joecool! Says: md ep #1 -- u go, girl! Go Seras!

The ex-police girl allowed herself a small smile.

Policegirl says: that's nice

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: whos your fave character, Policegirl?

Seras thought.

Policegirl says: isn't it obvious? But I really like…Pip too!

Joecool! Says: you a shipper?

Policegirl says: what?

Ripperjack says: whats ur fave pairing?

Policegirl says: Oh! Maxwell X Integra.

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: yeah, that's cute considering they hate each other's guts

Ripperjack says: u know what other pairings sick like that?

Joecool! Says: do we really have to hear it?

Ripperjack says: ALUCARD X ANDERSON! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

Policegirl says: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!! Ur really sick!

Yellowrosesbackstabber says: you no like yaoi?

Policegirl says: normally yeah but that's just wrong. GTG.

She logged off, feeling slightly strange.

Next chapter: The Laughing Nazis of Millennium!