Authors Note: Okay, I'm going to point out a few things here. This is my
first Zelda fic, and felt it would make a nice contrast to the other
(great!) Zelda pieces of fanfiction. I love Link/Zelda pairings, but
thought it would be fun if Link was kind of forgotten post-Ocarina and ends
up.well, I won't reveal too much! Plus, Malon's kind of sweet ^_^ Oh, and
if anyone's shocked by Link in this chapter, don't worry, he won't stay
like this for long. Remember, it is fiction, right?
Link was drunk. He couldn't quite work out how long he'd been drunk, but in his alcohol muffled brain, he was pretty sure he'd been drunk for some time. At least, judging by the concerned expression on the face of the barman, this was probably the case.
To think, he thought, muttering under his breath, the hero of time is reduced to this. From his perspective on a bar stool in the Impa Inn, he should have been the king of Hyrule by now. However, it seemed that being a hero was something of a temporary occupation these days. Back then, he remembered, it had been good. He was only twenty-three now, but the days when he was a tender seventeen had been far better. The ceremony to celebrate his victory over Ganondorf still stayed fresh in his mind, a gold-tinted example of a past that was his golden age.
"We celebrate the hero of time and his achievements over the forces of darkness; for he is a true hero!" he'd heard the Princess announce, to the thunderous applause of an appreciative and loving audience. In his naïvete, he believed that it would only get better. At the time, he'd have believed that Zelda would want to marry him. This was apparently quickly ruled out once the King subtly reminded him that he lacked several things to be eligible for that; money, land and the lack of a title that smacked of inbreeding. The royalties had been short lived. The plaque to celebrate his victory had been moved from the main courtyard into the official lavatory of the royal family, meaning that the only time the royal family was likely to remember him these days was when the wine flowed strongly and it seemed too far to be sick outside. Or when they were relieving themselves, not something Link liked to think about particularly.
The question he was asking himself, a question he'd been asking for about three or four years in fact, was why he was here. People were lucky enough to remember who he was, even though the apocalypse had been narrowly averted only six years previously, but like most national disasters, it was of interest for a year or so and then was promptly resigned to the odd sock drawer of historical events. As far as Zelda was concerned of course, he barely existed. Link had taken to drifting between jobs, at first starting as a palace courtier, then as the man who cleaned the temple of time, even as a market sellers assistant. Link eventually found a niche in an incredibly dull ten to three am job in the nightwatch, which earned him so little money that even rats didn't stoop so low as to rip him off. His living expenses were balanced by a seven-hour day job between nine and four pm. A combination of almost eternal exhaustion and a terminal addiction to drinking establishments inflicted by a punishing twelve-hour working day was what had left him unhappy and bored in Kakariko Town, often in the Impa Inn. It was a three-minute stagger to the cottage given him by the royal family as a reward for his 'contribution'.
The cottage hadn't been there before of course. Most of what stood hadn't been there before. Immediately post-Ganondorf, the entire population felt that what was needed was a baby boom - an activity that had delayed the rebuilding of Hyrule City by some days at any rate - and all of a sudden settlements had popped up like tropical diseases all over the map. The existing settlements had expanded considerably; Kakariko village was no longer a village, its population having quadrupled almost overnight when the building work began.
Even Kokiri village, the village of eternal children was a thriving civic centre. Saria had actually remembered his existence some months ago and had sent him an invitation to see the opening of the new Kokiri Public library. He had felt like pointing out to her the shortcomings of a library whose main users would be a bunch of kids, and how the librarians might find it difficult to cope in the ensuing miasma of paper darts. He had not however, and had decided to make the long trek down to the village. Things had changed, certainly. Saria, despite her child body, had the mind of a rabid twenty-something businesswoman and had even made Link wait outside her office in the freezing rain so that she could finish her meeting with the town planners.
She may have been his childhood companion, he thought fuzzily as he stared at the bottom of his beer-glass, but even she'd moved on. Sage of the Forest temple she might be, but she wasn't sage about much else.
"You might want to make that yer last one" the barkeeper said as gently as a man with almost everything in common with a grizzly bar apart from its better table manners could manage.
Link looked blearily up at him.
"S'not closing time" he muttered.
"No, it technically ain't.but I think if ye have any more then I'll have to fold ye up and send you home by post"
Link decided to launch into a well-earned rant just before he knew he would be shown 'kindly' to the door.
"Prinzess Zelda, huh? Bloody princesss.she rules us all now, so she's a queen, t'chnically speakin'."
"Is that a fact." The barkeeper said with little interest, cleaning a glass that wouldn't ever be clean but that at least had to have its yellowish sheen scraped off.
"Oh, I was usef'l once." Link waved a hand idly in the air ".the hero of.thingy. Time. Now what? Not royalty they said..cuh." he grunted "And now, who knows a ssingle thing 'bout the once great Link? Hm? No-one, that's who."
"Well, sometimes we have our big role, and then people just forget us. It's just time to get on with life, Link" the Bartender said, who'd heard Link say this countless times before.
"I work my bloody heart out, night n' day" Link slurred, with greater fervour "Do I get a ssingle bit of recognition or at leasst some respec'? Nooo, everyone loves Zelda now. Never mind that I saved the lot of your miserable backsssides."
The bartender looked at him with something not unlike pity. Link, while still physically fit and handsome was not quite as bright-eyed as he'd once been. The bartender couldn't help but feel sorry for Link, and a little guilty for not showing a little bit more respect; Link had saved them all once. As Link had often said in his alcohol-induced sobs, people often wanted a hero on a merely temporary basis. They were useful for a while, but then everyone forgot about them.
"I think it's about time you went home and slept it off, Link" the bartender said, kindly "You'll feel better tomorrow."
Link groped for his green cloak and hood, and after a few misses, managed to pick it up and even fasten it around his neck.
"T'morrow's another day" Link mumbled, walking in a zig-zag path that took him into the doorjamb of the pub door. After a few curses that were probably banned in some areas of Hyrule, Link finally stumbled out into the chilly night. There was something slightly sobering about being smacked in the face with icy cold air, but something even more sobering about the extremely effective if disgusting vomiting session that Link felt the need to undertake in the bushes outside the pub door.
'BLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEARRRGHHH.' He rested his cheek on the cold cobbles, only inches away from his supper. He wanted to sleep right here, but wasn't sure he wanted to risk it. After all, despite the peace across the land, the population was still 'human'. He stumbled to his feet, and made it across to the centrepiece town-square fountain that had once been the well of three parts. It was now quite ornate, a cherub supporting a vast amphora that it tipped into the pool of water, the constant trickle of water quite soothing to Link's ears. Also to his burning throat, as he washed his face and cooled the fire that his overactive gag reflex had stoked to bursting point.
He blinked, and looked up at the scatter of diamonds in the night sky. Looking down, he saw a face that looked temporarily unfamiliar, but that he quickly registered as being his. When you couldn't even recognise your own reflection, things really were getting serious. He shook his still fuzzy head. It would be worth asking the bartender of the Impa Inn just how much alcohol was in his beer and how many small insects had been corroded like popcorn in sulphuric acid by so much as dipping a toe in. Then, Link readjusted his hood, and began to stagger home. As he did so, a song rose in his throat.
"Stars, I rightly love you, I was once in love.with a bonny lass." His voice got louder, echoing in the empty streets as he sang.
"My life I gave to you; you stole my heart.now do be true" His rich tenor voice, slightly unstable thanks to the influence of drink, was now filling the streets with song. However, his singing was not popular with the resident of the first floor apartment of number twelve, Dampe road. The kettle dropped and Link did also, shortly after. In his daze, stars fluttered by his vision before they reassembled themselves in the sky above. He smirked.
"Git" he grunted, before crawling very slowly towards the door of his own cottage. The next morning would be interesting to Link, if only because of the nature of the visitor who would find Link propped up in bed, unshaven and looking more like Ganondorf than Link. The visitor would be a young woman. Link didn't know, but Malon had come to town. And she would change his life in so many ways Link couldn't even contemplate it right now. Well, he couldn't. He was being sick again.
Link was beginning to wish that some enterprising businessman had never invented liquor in any shape or form. The six hundred-gun salute being played inside his brain was also inciting a wish in him that he'd never been born. Groaning slightly, he pulled his crumpled body up a bit further on his bed. Sunlight streamed in through the windows, illuminating his hungover frame. Right now he needed sunlight like he needed to be told Zelda was outside waiting to beat him to death with a joint of ham.
Link was drunk. He couldn't quite work out how long he'd been drunk, but in his alcohol muffled brain, he was pretty sure he'd been drunk for some time. At least, judging by the concerned expression on the face of the barman, this was probably the case.
To think, he thought, muttering under his breath, the hero of time is reduced to this. From his perspective on a bar stool in the Impa Inn, he should have been the king of Hyrule by now. However, it seemed that being a hero was something of a temporary occupation these days. Back then, he remembered, it had been good. He was only twenty-three now, but the days when he was a tender seventeen had been far better. The ceremony to celebrate his victory over Ganondorf still stayed fresh in his mind, a gold-tinted example of a past that was his golden age.
"We celebrate the hero of time and his achievements over the forces of darkness; for he is a true hero!" he'd heard the Princess announce, to the thunderous applause of an appreciative and loving audience. In his naïvete, he believed that it would only get better. At the time, he'd have believed that Zelda would want to marry him. This was apparently quickly ruled out once the King subtly reminded him that he lacked several things to be eligible for that; money, land and the lack of a title that smacked of inbreeding. The royalties had been short lived. The plaque to celebrate his victory had been moved from the main courtyard into the official lavatory of the royal family, meaning that the only time the royal family was likely to remember him these days was when the wine flowed strongly and it seemed too far to be sick outside. Or when they were relieving themselves, not something Link liked to think about particularly.
The question he was asking himself, a question he'd been asking for about three or four years in fact, was why he was here. People were lucky enough to remember who he was, even though the apocalypse had been narrowly averted only six years previously, but like most national disasters, it was of interest for a year or so and then was promptly resigned to the odd sock drawer of historical events. As far as Zelda was concerned of course, he barely existed. Link had taken to drifting between jobs, at first starting as a palace courtier, then as the man who cleaned the temple of time, even as a market sellers assistant. Link eventually found a niche in an incredibly dull ten to three am job in the nightwatch, which earned him so little money that even rats didn't stoop so low as to rip him off. His living expenses were balanced by a seven-hour day job between nine and four pm. A combination of almost eternal exhaustion and a terminal addiction to drinking establishments inflicted by a punishing twelve-hour working day was what had left him unhappy and bored in Kakariko Town, often in the Impa Inn. It was a three-minute stagger to the cottage given him by the royal family as a reward for his 'contribution'.
The cottage hadn't been there before of course. Most of what stood hadn't been there before. Immediately post-Ganondorf, the entire population felt that what was needed was a baby boom - an activity that had delayed the rebuilding of Hyrule City by some days at any rate - and all of a sudden settlements had popped up like tropical diseases all over the map. The existing settlements had expanded considerably; Kakariko village was no longer a village, its population having quadrupled almost overnight when the building work began.
Even Kokiri village, the village of eternal children was a thriving civic centre. Saria had actually remembered his existence some months ago and had sent him an invitation to see the opening of the new Kokiri Public library. He had felt like pointing out to her the shortcomings of a library whose main users would be a bunch of kids, and how the librarians might find it difficult to cope in the ensuing miasma of paper darts. He had not however, and had decided to make the long trek down to the village. Things had changed, certainly. Saria, despite her child body, had the mind of a rabid twenty-something businesswoman and had even made Link wait outside her office in the freezing rain so that she could finish her meeting with the town planners.
She may have been his childhood companion, he thought fuzzily as he stared at the bottom of his beer-glass, but even she'd moved on. Sage of the Forest temple she might be, but she wasn't sage about much else.
"You might want to make that yer last one" the barkeeper said as gently as a man with almost everything in common with a grizzly bar apart from its better table manners could manage.
Link looked blearily up at him.
"S'not closing time" he muttered.
"No, it technically ain't.but I think if ye have any more then I'll have to fold ye up and send you home by post"
Link decided to launch into a well-earned rant just before he knew he would be shown 'kindly' to the door.
"Prinzess Zelda, huh? Bloody princesss.she rules us all now, so she's a queen, t'chnically speakin'."
"Is that a fact." The barkeeper said with little interest, cleaning a glass that wouldn't ever be clean but that at least had to have its yellowish sheen scraped off.
"Oh, I was usef'l once." Link waved a hand idly in the air ".the hero of.thingy. Time. Now what? Not royalty they said..cuh." he grunted "And now, who knows a ssingle thing 'bout the once great Link? Hm? No-one, that's who."
"Well, sometimes we have our big role, and then people just forget us. It's just time to get on with life, Link" the Bartender said, who'd heard Link say this countless times before.
"I work my bloody heart out, night n' day" Link slurred, with greater fervour "Do I get a ssingle bit of recognition or at leasst some respec'? Nooo, everyone loves Zelda now. Never mind that I saved the lot of your miserable backsssides."
The bartender looked at him with something not unlike pity. Link, while still physically fit and handsome was not quite as bright-eyed as he'd once been. The bartender couldn't help but feel sorry for Link, and a little guilty for not showing a little bit more respect; Link had saved them all once. As Link had often said in his alcohol-induced sobs, people often wanted a hero on a merely temporary basis. They were useful for a while, but then everyone forgot about them.
"I think it's about time you went home and slept it off, Link" the bartender said, kindly "You'll feel better tomorrow."
Link groped for his green cloak and hood, and after a few misses, managed to pick it up and even fasten it around his neck.
"T'morrow's another day" Link mumbled, walking in a zig-zag path that took him into the doorjamb of the pub door. After a few curses that were probably banned in some areas of Hyrule, Link finally stumbled out into the chilly night. There was something slightly sobering about being smacked in the face with icy cold air, but something even more sobering about the extremely effective if disgusting vomiting session that Link felt the need to undertake in the bushes outside the pub door.
'BLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEARRRGHHH.' He rested his cheek on the cold cobbles, only inches away from his supper. He wanted to sleep right here, but wasn't sure he wanted to risk it. After all, despite the peace across the land, the population was still 'human'. He stumbled to his feet, and made it across to the centrepiece town-square fountain that had once been the well of three parts. It was now quite ornate, a cherub supporting a vast amphora that it tipped into the pool of water, the constant trickle of water quite soothing to Link's ears. Also to his burning throat, as he washed his face and cooled the fire that his overactive gag reflex had stoked to bursting point.
He blinked, and looked up at the scatter of diamonds in the night sky. Looking down, he saw a face that looked temporarily unfamiliar, but that he quickly registered as being his. When you couldn't even recognise your own reflection, things really were getting serious. He shook his still fuzzy head. It would be worth asking the bartender of the Impa Inn just how much alcohol was in his beer and how many small insects had been corroded like popcorn in sulphuric acid by so much as dipping a toe in. Then, Link readjusted his hood, and began to stagger home. As he did so, a song rose in his throat.
"Stars, I rightly love you, I was once in love.with a bonny lass." His voice got louder, echoing in the empty streets as he sang.
"My life I gave to you; you stole my heart.now do be true" His rich tenor voice, slightly unstable thanks to the influence of drink, was now filling the streets with song. However, his singing was not popular with the resident of the first floor apartment of number twelve, Dampe road. The kettle dropped and Link did also, shortly after. In his daze, stars fluttered by his vision before they reassembled themselves in the sky above. He smirked.
"Git" he grunted, before crawling very slowly towards the door of his own cottage. The next morning would be interesting to Link, if only because of the nature of the visitor who would find Link propped up in bed, unshaven and looking more like Ganondorf than Link. The visitor would be a young woman. Link didn't know, but Malon had come to town. And she would change his life in so many ways Link couldn't even contemplate it right now. Well, he couldn't. He was being sick again.
Link was beginning to wish that some enterprising businessman had never invented liquor in any shape or form. The six hundred-gun salute being played inside his brain was also inciting a wish in him that he'd never been born. Groaning slightly, he pulled his crumpled body up a bit further on his bed. Sunlight streamed in through the windows, illuminating his hungover frame. Right now he needed sunlight like he needed to be told Zelda was outside waiting to beat him to death with a joint of ham.