Chapter 16:: Christmas is Nearing Hogwarts

The days before Christmas were nearing, as was Christmas break. All his teachers were loading on the homework, as it was to be expected – they did it every year. Harry sat on his windowsill late at night – a few days before Christmas break was to begin. Harry and Draco also seemed to be getting into a lot of fights as time passed.

"It's just Christmas Draco, it's nothing special."

"Nothing special? Harry, we're going to be some of the only people staying here at Christmas. We'll be able to spend our first real holiday together, and it's no big deal?"

Harry was beginning to tire of Draco putting huge amounts of pressure on Harry to organize something special for them to do on Christmas Eve. He hadn't suggested that Harry plan something – but he knew that it would stop Draco from complaining if he organized some kind of dinner for the two of them. Harry sat with his head resting on his knees looking at the snowflakes fall peacefully to the ground.

Harry wondered if his mother, father and if Sirius would approve of his relationship with Draco. Harry could only satisfy himself into believing that all three would accept it, knowing that it may be a lie. It was times like these, late at night; close to Christmas that Harry wished his family was still alive. He hated staying at Hogwarts during the Christmas Holidays, never having anyone to go to or visit. His life was at Hogwarts.

He was happy that he had found Draco, and that they loved eachother. Some days it felt like that was all he needed to survive and keep on going - but today it seemed as if the love shared between them wasn't enough. Harry felt empty inside. He longed for the loving touch of his mothers hands, he longed for the kisses that he barley remembered. The only time he had ever remembered her voice was when she was screaming before her death.

"You okay Harry...?" Ron yawned as he turned to face Harry.

"What? Oh... Yeah, I'm fine. Go to sleep."

Ron rolled out of bed and walked towards Harry. "I know something-" Ron yawned as he began again. "I know something is bothering you, out with it."

Harry looked out the window. The smile on his face was small and forced. "I just miss my family..." Harry looked back at Ron.

He stood there and scratched his armpit. "I'm sorry." Ron didn't have any idea what to say to that. He had an over abundance of family in his life. The boys each had something to be jealous of. Harry had loads of money, and Ron had a family.

"It's alright, Ron." Harry smiled and looked out the window again placing his head back on his knees. Ron stood there for a moment longer before making his way to the bathroom. When he came back, he noticed that Harry was crying. He walked over the sill, took Harry's arm in his hand, and pulled him up into a hug. "I don't know what it feels like to not have a family to go to, or what it's like to only have your friends to rely on for support and love Harry... But I'll be here for you when you need me. You can trust me on that."

Harry nodded into Ron's chest and heaved a sigh. "Thank-you." Ron smiled and led Harry to his bed.

"Try to get some sleep before classes. We have a test today in Divination... That crazy old bat better not make us tell her what is going to happen when Saturn is crossing Pluto's path when the day is cold and the sun is hidden behind some great tree – and what kind of dangerous nonsense it can result in." Harry laughed, and Ron rolled his eyes with a smile on his face.

"I wonder how we manage to pass that class sometimes, and why we keep taking it." Harry laughed as he lay down on his bed covering himself in his comforter.

"Probably because my mum keeps getting us the damn textbook and we feel to bad to tell her we don't want to take that class anymore because it's a load of rubbish." Ron yawned and tuned to face Harry. "Do you think we'll graduate? Do you ever worry about that?"

Harry paused and thought for a moment before he lay on his side to face Ron. "... All the time." They looked eachother in the eyes for a few moments longer. "Then I wonder what we are going to do after Hogwarts, were we're going to live, what kind of jobs we're going to get..." Harry paused and looked down at the piece of fabric he was fussing with. "Or if we'll get married... and have kids."

Ron smiled. "We'll get ourselves a life, live with eachother, work as Quidditch players, and we'll both marry happily and have tons of kids with bad hair."

Harry laughed. "Both of us?"

"Both of us."

"Go to sleep you pansy's... we have a test tomorrow." Seamus threw a pillow at them and smacked Ron square in the head.

"Yeah, yeah Seamus! Bloody hell..." Ron was rubbing his eye – the pillow had smacked into it and the fabric brushed against his eye. Ron launched the pillow back at Seamus and laughed when it hit him with a grunt. "Night Harry."

Harry smiled back at Ron. "Night."

"I failed the test. That old goat did ask about that Pluto, Saturn junk! How dare she do that, what a horrible thing t-"

"For Christ's sake Ron, shut up! It's not like she crept into the dorm at night and took down notes about what we were saying about her class. Just study next time, maybe that had something to do with you failing the test."

"You're just bragging because you passed the test Harry."

Harry shoved his test mark infront of Ron's face. "RON! I passed by two points! Why on earth would I brag about that?"

Ron shot him a glare. "I don't know it just seems like something you'd do!"

"Uugh... RON! Since when do I brag about low passes? Since when do I brag about anything?"

"I DON'T KNOW!"

"Then why did you say it?"

"BOYS! Stop it this instant!" Hermione had dodged between them before either could throw a punch – if that's the way the conversation was headed. Harry and Ron glared at eachother. "Just because you failed one of Professor Trelawny's stupid tests doesn't mean that you have to scream at eachother over it!"

Harry rolled his eyes and started to walk away. "I'll talk to you both later." Ron and Hermione turned to look at him leave.

"What is wrong with him?"

"Obviously you, Ronald."

"What did I do?!"

Hermione sighed, rolled her eyes, and grabbed his arm to direct him away from Harry.

Harry was looking down at his test when he was slapped in the butt. He whirled around and shot the person who did it a deadly glare. When he realized that it was Draco, he softened his look only a little.

"Whoa... what's wrong with you?"

Harry thrust his test into Draco's hand and began walking. "Ron."

"... Ron? Did Ron do your test? Is that why you did so horrible?"

Harry rolled his eyes and breathed angrily. "No... Ron is accusing me of bragging about this mark."

"Why would you brag about such a bad mark?" Draco quickly changed the subject when he noticed the look in Harry's eyes. "I was kidding, calm down, Harry. Ron was probably just pissed off because he got a lower mark than you."

Harry sighed heavily. "Yeah. I suppose so, but-" Harry turned to face Draco with his hands in the air and smacked him across the face. "Oh my God... Draco – I'm so sorry..." Harry put his hand to Draco's cheek with a worried look on his face.

Draco laughed and put his hand over Harry's. "It's fine, Harry. Let's go outside for a while...?" Harry looked at Draco a moment longer and leaned in for a kiss.

"Hello, by the way."

Draco smiled. "Hi."

The two boys walked around the grounds for a while. Harry wouldn't let Draco touch him, or hold his hand. It seemed that these days, Draco was clingy – and Harry hated almost every minute of it.

"Why won't you let me touch you?"

"What...? I let you touch me all the time." Harry was slowly moving farther away from Draco before his arm was caught. Harry made a face at the touch.

"Not as of lately, Harry. When I touch you... you make that face at me. It makes me feel like you're disgusted by my touch, something that at this point, I don't think is very far from the truth."

Harry rolled his shoulders and looked into Draco's eyes taking his hands. "I'm sorry Draco, I get moody around the Holidays. Some days I just don't like being touched. It's not that your touch disgusts me, because it doesn't – it sends me to the moon and back..." Harry smiled and took Draco in his arms for a hug, resting his cheek on Draco's jacket. "It's just that it makes me sad that I don't have a family to go to for the holidays – and I never will. I just end up rejecting all human contact most of the time because I feel sorry for myself. I've never had someone to be with alone over the Holidays before," Harry looked up into Draco's eyes, still holding him tightly. "It's weird to have someone be in love with me. I can't really explain how I feel, I'm not doing a proper job now – but please forgive me for the way I've been acting. I can't stand the thought of loosing you, I love you too much..."

Draco smiled back at the boy, and took him in his arms, resting his head on Harry's. "This year will be a first for the both of us then. Your first year with someone to be with, and mine... without a family." Draco ended the embrace and started for the school. "This year will be really different Harry, but I'll try my best to make it your finest," Draco smiled down at the Gryffindor. "Okay?"

Harry smiled back. "Okay. And I'll try my best to make it your finest."

"You don't have to try Harry, you've already made it the best year of my life simply because you love me."

"You're such a girl, Draco."

"Well... I don't like being on top, it only fits." Harry and Draco burst into laughter as they entered the school grounds.

The last day of classes had just ended, and everyone had started to pack their bags to ship off to their families for the week. Harry sat on his bed and watched all his friends back their bags noisily. Harry drew his covers up around him and lay down facing the window next his bed. The day was dying, and the snow became alive.

"Hey Harry...?"

"What." Harry responded without shifting his position in his bed.

"I'm sorry for being such a prat the other day. I was just upset because I got a lower mark than you did..."

Harry smiled to himself – Draco was right. Draco was almost always right. "Yeah, It's fine Ron."

Ron walked over to Harry's bed and sat down beside him. He was holding a package as Harry turned to face him. "I got you a gift," He passed the blue and silver wrapped present in Harry's direction. "I couldn't afford much...so- "

"Thanks Ron. I got you one too..." Harry shifted his weight and leaned over the side of his bed searching underneath it for Ron's gift. Harry flipped back up red in the face, his hair was almost standing straight up as he readjusted himself to face Ron. "Here." Harry tried to tame his hair as Ron marveled at the size of the gift. It was in a huge red box with a huge gold and silver ribbon to match.

"It's huge... you shouldn't have spent so much on me..." Ron suddenly felt bad that the gift he got Harry was so small.

"It's alright – don't feel bad. It was actually rather cheap." Harry laughed. Ron looked up and smiled at him.

"Cheap to you, and cheap to me have different meanings Harry."

"Same difference."

"...Same difference?"

"Yeah. It shouldn't matter how much we spend on eachother Ron. I would happily just get a hug and a 'Happy Christmas' from you than a gift."

Ron smiled and got up to place the new gift in his trunk. "I'm going with Hermione to her family's house for Christmas break."

"Nervous?"

"God yes. I'm so scared to meet her dad. What if he doesn't like me or thinks I'm too poor or something...?"

Ron was obsessed with the fact that he didn't have a lot of money to his name, and thought that since he didn't have any – that would change everyone's opinion of him. "I'm sure they'll like you Ron, and if they don't – Hermione will set them straight. She won't let anyone bad mouth you."

Ron smiled and sat on his bed. "I hope you're right.... Hey! Are you spending Christmas with Draco this year...?"

Harry looked down at his hands. "Yeah. It's going to be weird," Harry looked up at Ron with no trace of a smile on his face. "Spending Christmas with him."

"... Why?"

"I don't know..." Harry looked past Ron and to Seamus who was smacking Neville with a pillow. "Because I've never actually spent Christmas with someone who loves me."

"You've spent it with Hermione and me," Ron paused and looked around. "We love you."

"Yeah, but it's different with Draco. Like this'll be the first time you spend Christmas alone with Hermione. I don't know – its kind of hard to explain." Ron nodded and got off the bed.

"I had better finish packing. Me and Hermione are leaving really early tomorrow morning to meet her parents." Ron offered Harry a small smile before leaning over his trunk to shove in another pair of pants.

AN:: Sorry this chapter is so...odd. I'm starting to get disinterested in the story, and after I finish the 5th book, I'm going to start another story. So this one may be updated a little less frequently – much like how it's been this week. I'll still write this one, but will probably be a bit more active here after I've finished my diplomas. –nod, nod- Thank-you all for the reviews! Much love to all of you! I'll try to update this one tomorrow before I go to my dad's for the weekend.