This wasn't supposed to have a 2nd chap but oh well hope you all like. R&R, we would like to know, its a bit confusing if you want will continue and in the next chap give and explanation. Kaiba is a bit OOC too.
Disclaimer: We don't own YGO but the plot line for this fic is ours. =============================================
I can feel the comforting feeling of his arms wrapped around me again. It's nice to know he's here with me and not in the arms of another. In all I suppose no I know it is greatly selfish to think that but it is only because I love him.
Honestly I don't know how I would have survived this time with out him here. He keeps me stable, calm, and realistic. With out him beside me for so long I would have started living in a memory, reliving events in my life over and over to make it seem real. I would have ignored the order of everything just for the sake of a false happiness. He's my anchor.
Today he came to say good-bye to us for the final time. He's come many time's before this staying for hours just to talk about life and how things have been. Love interests, broken heart, friends, both his are our own. At times he'll speak of the company but rarely I guess he sees not point in it. Speaking of things that will never concern us again. But today was different; today he said his finally good bye.
He didn't speak to us like he normally does, no, not this time. For once a guest, his husband of months, companied him. No words were said he stood in the middle of the entrance hall and smiled down the corridor, after wards he began wondering the house smiling before continuing along in his tour. When he was done he dragged his husband out behind him and they smiled at where we stood before turning around, hands clasped and walking away.
It was all very romantic and I guess it made me feel insignificant. I had that feeling of regret; fear and so much more flowed through me. He was saying good-bye to me and letting go, but I couldn't and still I can't. I don't' wanna lose him, I know he's in good hands, in the arms of his soul mate but I'm afraid that he will get hurt.
My lover knows me to well he's saying the right words calming me letting me become sure that things will be okay. I'll be able to let go soon but for now I'll hold on. I have to hold on to my baby brother for now, when I'm convinced he is okay I will let go.
Jou's arms are around me, now my feelings are changing. I feel guilty; it was my fault that caused all of this. If I were better, smarter, there more than things would have been okay. But now I always had to work, I had to be better at the wrong things smarter than my elders in every aspect. If I would have slowed down than maybe we would still be our happy little family. If I had been home sooner things would be fine.
Here they are those re assuring words of love and truth, he's telling me he's happy the way things are, and that both him and Mokuba are happy. They are both with the one's they love and will always care for. He forgive me for thirteen years ago, they both do. They don't even blame me, in all truth it wasn't my fault, but I wasn't there to protect them so it is my fault still they forgive me. I love my puppy.
The tears are trickling down my face; his words are comforting to me. He's leading me inside, he's just said he loves me and I know the truth of how much he does. We're settled in bed, the snow is beginning to fall outside, and the wind allows them to blow through the broken glass. It's cold but we don't shiver, a bonus when you're dead.
We will never age, or get cold or hot we will always be just as we were forty-eight hours before it happened. I still blame myself if I was here than it would have all been okay. We'll sleep together tonight but we wont need it, but we'll do it as routine. Everything is falling apart, decaying with the whether, soon it will all be gone but it won't matter. We'll live in the world the way it was before the fire, it'll be a memory but in it we will make new memories. We will know the world and be about to leave that memory it won't ensnare us. To us the world may change out side but in here it will always be the same and that makes up happy.
In this bed my arms are around his waist my face buried in his hair and I feel forgiven, I will always blame myself but I can let go for now. Tomorrow when the sun rises a new day will start and we will live in our dream together. Good-bye little brother, thank you koinu and I feel forgiven tomorrows dream will be better. Because it will no long be an illusion I will accept it all and he will stand beside me as we both accept out fate.
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Ja ne.