Mom and Dad had left Ryan and me at home yet again, while they got dinner.
They offered for us to come along but I still felt uneasy about the car,
and Mom still understood.
So Ryan and I stayed behind and sat on the eggshells again.
I was a little scared about being alone with him... seeing how I had made him look like a liar and manhandler.
I lounged back into the couch, as if I had no cares in the world.
"What did you dream about?" Ryan asked out of nowhere.
"It's personal."
And, he let out a loud chuckle.
"What?" I shot back, and he just kept watching TV as if he didn't hear me at all.
"What?!" I asked again, leaning over to him, and grabbing him by the collar.
"I don't think you want to do that." He told me through clenched teeth.
"Oh?" I narrowed my eyes, and teasingly yanked his collar, "And why is that, Ryan?"
Before anything could go beyond that, the front door was heard opening by both of us. I gave him one last glare, and harshly let go of his collar, leaning back into the couch like nothing had happened.
"We got Chinese!" Mom shouted cheerfully, holding a couple of white plastic bags stacked with Styrofoam containers.
"Great!" I smiled to her, getting up from the couch, and making my way to the dinning room.
We all grabbed our plates, cups, and eating utensils, and took seats at our regular spots.
I once heard that after a near-death experience you're hungry...
Either that was true, or I was just hungry as it was.
Mom had served me along with everyone else, and they all dug in, while I just sat there, rearranging the food on my plate.
"You're not hungry, baby?" Mom questioned worriedly.
Maybe she heard that theory too...
"No, no, I am." I perked up, twisting my fork into my bowl of Chow Mein, while shooting her a reassuring smile.
Fly right, Seth. Fly right.
Throughout dinner Dad was virtually mute, Ryan's eyes burned into me, and Mom seemed to be admiring me like a saint. I, on the other hand, cleverly spat out chewed food into my napkin.
I got real good at that maneuver...
Oh, the deception...
"So..." I cleared my throat, placing my elbow on the table, "where were you guys?" I eyed my parents, while twirling my fork between my fingers.
They both tensed up a bit, only making me more suspicious of their whereabouts.
"We went to get food, Seth." Dad replied with his mouth full.
"No, I mean earlier...when we got home you weren't here. Where were you?"
A beat...
"Errands, baby." Mom answered.
"Errands..." I repeated with disbelief, and Mom just nodded in response.
"You had to run errands after I was in a car accident?" I began sarcastically and it didn't stop there, "You had to run errands after I watched people die?"
That was a lie...
How I loved to make them feel guilt.
"Errands... Yes, I can see how that would be really important." My eye twitched as my parents exchanged looks.
"No one died, Seth..." Ryan suddenly said, correcting me, "They talked about it on the news and they said no one was severally injured... or killed."
How I hated Ryan Atwood.
I squeezed my fork, making my knuckles as white as I'm sure my complexion was. Mom and Dad exchanged a look again... this time it was disappointment and that hurt.
"Oh..." I grinned, rising my eyebrows, "Well, that's good."
They knew I was a liar then, and I couldn't help but think that they were all against me now.
Maybe it was the blood loss from earlier or the starvation, or maybe it was the truth coming out only to bite me on the ass but I suddenly felt faint. I reached out for my cup, thinking that a nice good swig would help, but I just ended up spilling the water all over myself.
I shut my eyes, and in that moment, I was thirteen again, and it knocked me over like a massive tile wave.
I dropped the fork and it chipped the China.
"Seth..." Dad began, and I just raised my hand, implying that I was fine.
"I'm so clumsy." I said emotionless after a moment, while my bloodshot eyes jumped to each of them. I stood up from the chair, hitting the corner of the table hard with my hip, as I scurried off toward the stairs.
I ran up to my room, where I locked the door behind me. I slowly pulled my shirt off, and slipped out of my pants. I stood in the middle of my room, hesitantly looking into the dark bathroom. I gulped, and made my way inside, flipping on the switch. I winced when the bathroom lit up, causing me to face the image before me.
My breathing picked up...
I was in complete shock of the boy in the mirror...
He was even bigger then I had imagined.
My god, how can he even sit in chairs?
But wait... that boy was me...
I shook my head in disbelief.
No...
What was I doing wrong?!
My eyes darted to Ralph. I was angry with him. I was so angry with him. He was supposed to be my friend, but he was just like the others.
"You're a fucking Twoface!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, and with both hands I cleared everything that was on the counter of the sink at him.
Breathing heavily, I looked back at the mirror, and I could have sworn I heard it laugh. My eyes searched the reflection, only making my eyes focus at my gut and all the ugly stretch marks it came with. My eyes watered, and I bent over quickly, taking the scale off the floor and heaving it into the mirror. Satisfied with its shatter, I left the bathroom, where I threw down my computer chair that was occupied with dirty laundry and plates deliberately empty for no suspicion could arise.
I turned on the TV, when I heard feet stomping up the stairs. I turned the volume up, covered my ears, shut my eyes, and paced my bedroom floor.
"Everything's fine!!" I shouted tearfully, holding my head in my hands.
It was all over now.
What was I going to do?
I greeted the lump that formed in my throat, as I sobbed childishly.
God, I was pathetic.
"Open this door, Seth!!!" Dad ordered, and pounded on the door, only making me feel even more panicked.
I had to get out of there.
But how?
My eyes lit up, and I dashed for the window, where I opened it up and used my hands to pop off the screen. I hopped onto the ledge, ready to leap out when I realized how insane it that was.
"What am I doing?" I asked myself logically, and I was about to step down, when my door busted open, startling me.
I gasped, as I felt my hands slip and my body fell forward out of the window. I desperately tried to grab onto something... but there was nothing to stop me from falling.
I faintly heard the screams of my family, as my body met the ground.
So Ryan and I stayed behind and sat on the eggshells again.
I was a little scared about being alone with him... seeing how I had made him look like a liar and manhandler.
I lounged back into the couch, as if I had no cares in the world.
"What did you dream about?" Ryan asked out of nowhere.
"It's personal."
And, he let out a loud chuckle.
"What?" I shot back, and he just kept watching TV as if he didn't hear me at all.
"What?!" I asked again, leaning over to him, and grabbing him by the collar.
"I don't think you want to do that." He told me through clenched teeth.
"Oh?" I narrowed my eyes, and teasingly yanked his collar, "And why is that, Ryan?"
Before anything could go beyond that, the front door was heard opening by both of us. I gave him one last glare, and harshly let go of his collar, leaning back into the couch like nothing had happened.
"We got Chinese!" Mom shouted cheerfully, holding a couple of white plastic bags stacked with Styrofoam containers.
"Great!" I smiled to her, getting up from the couch, and making my way to the dinning room.
We all grabbed our plates, cups, and eating utensils, and took seats at our regular spots.
I once heard that after a near-death experience you're hungry...
Either that was true, or I was just hungry as it was.
Mom had served me along with everyone else, and they all dug in, while I just sat there, rearranging the food on my plate.
"You're not hungry, baby?" Mom questioned worriedly.
Maybe she heard that theory too...
"No, no, I am." I perked up, twisting my fork into my bowl of Chow Mein, while shooting her a reassuring smile.
Fly right, Seth. Fly right.
Throughout dinner Dad was virtually mute, Ryan's eyes burned into me, and Mom seemed to be admiring me like a saint. I, on the other hand, cleverly spat out chewed food into my napkin.
I got real good at that maneuver...
Oh, the deception...
"So..." I cleared my throat, placing my elbow on the table, "where were you guys?" I eyed my parents, while twirling my fork between my fingers.
They both tensed up a bit, only making me more suspicious of their whereabouts.
"We went to get food, Seth." Dad replied with his mouth full.
"No, I mean earlier...when we got home you weren't here. Where were you?"
A beat...
"Errands, baby." Mom answered.
"Errands..." I repeated with disbelief, and Mom just nodded in response.
"You had to run errands after I was in a car accident?" I began sarcastically and it didn't stop there, "You had to run errands after I watched people die?"
That was a lie...
How I loved to make them feel guilt.
"Errands... Yes, I can see how that would be really important." My eye twitched as my parents exchanged looks.
"No one died, Seth..." Ryan suddenly said, correcting me, "They talked about it on the news and they said no one was severally injured... or killed."
How I hated Ryan Atwood.
I squeezed my fork, making my knuckles as white as I'm sure my complexion was. Mom and Dad exchanged a look again... this time it was disappointment and that hurt.
"Oh..." I grinned, rising my eyebrows, "Well, that's good."
They knew I was a liar then, and I couldn't help but think that they were all against me now.
Maybe it was the blood loss from earlier or the starvation, or maybe it was the truth coming out only to bite me on the ass but I suddenly felt faint. I reached out for my cup, thinking that a nice good swig would help, but I just ended up spilling the water all over myself.
I shut my eyes, and in that moment, I was thirteen again, and it knocked me over like a massive tile wave.
I dropped the fork and it chipped the China.
"Seth..." Dad began, and I just raised my hand, implying that I was fine.
"I'm so clumsy." I said emotionless after a moment, while my bloodshot eyes jumped to each of them. I stood up from the chair, hitting the corner of the table hard with my hip, as I scurried off toward the stairs.
I ran up to my room, where I locked the door behind me. I slowly pulled my shirt off, and slipped out of my pants. I stood in the middle of my room, hesitantly looking into the dark bathroom. I gulped, and made my way inside, flipping on the switch. I winced when the bathroom lit up, causing me to face the image before me.
My breathing picked up...
I was in complete shock of the boy in the mirror...
He was even bigger then I had imagined.
My god, how can he even sit in chairs?
But wait... that boy was me...
I shook my head in disbelief.
No...
What was I doing wrong?!
My eyes darted to Ralph. I was angry with him. I was so angry with him. He was supposed to be my friend, but he was just like the others.
"You're a fucking Twoface!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, and with both hands I cleared everything that was on the counter of the sink at him.
Breathing heavily, I looked back at the mirror, and I could have sworn I heard it laugh. My eyes searched the reflection, only making my eyes focus at my gut and all the ugly stretch marks it came with. My eyes watered, and I bent over quickly, taking the scale off the floor and heaving it into the mirror. Satisfied with its shatter, I left the bathroom, where I threw down my computer chair that was occupied with dirty laundry and plates deliberately empty for no suspicion could arise.
I turned on the TV, when I heard feet stomping up the stairs. I turned the volume up, covered my ears, shut my eyes, and paced my bedroom floor.
"Everything's fine!!" I shouted tearfully, holding my head in my hands.
It was all over now.
What was I going to do?
I greeted the lump that formed in my throat, as I sobbed childishly.
God, I was pathetic.
"Open this door, Seth!!!" Dad ordered, and pounded on the door, only making me feel even more panicked.
I had to get out of there.
But how?
My eyes lit up, and I dashed for the window, where I opened it up and used my hands to pop off the screen. I hopped onto the ledge, ready to leap out when I realized how insane it that was.
"What am I doing?" I asked myself logically, and I was about to step down, when my door busted open, startling me.
I gasped, as I felt my hands slip and my body fell forward out of the window. I desperately tried to grab onto something... but there was nothing to stop me from falling.
I faintly heard the screams of my family, as my body met the ground.