Lucy couldn't believe her big hunk of man meat had been detained for
taking advantage of minor...
But there was no minor to be seen!
The FBI Agents were giving her a painful rectal probe. She was still
uncertain just why the agents had felt a need to do this. Kevin's DNA
sample had weirded them out for some reason...
It started earlier that night. Kevin, her husband of two years, had whispered in her ear, "I am damn horny, honey!"
They couldn't have sex in the house, because they lived very close to her parents, and she knew her mother had installed microphones so she could tell if Lucy was having carnal relations. Although Annie Camden frowned upon sex for pleasurable purposes, she did approve of copulation for the purpose of procreation, and she already had clothing for her future grandchildren. Lucy had been freaked out when her mother gave her pointers on what position to insure the conception of a future patriarch for Kevin's bloodline.
Yet as soon as they got to their usual movie theater, finally getting some privacy, hidden by a curtain of darkness from the prying eyes of the three- hundred people around them, it turned out that all three-hundred people were cops. Not from Kevin's precinct, but rather, from a precinct in Arizona. Because cops in Arizona apparently really, really disliked pedophiles, and for some reason, they thought Kevin was at least ten to twenty years older than her.
They swarmed en masse and dragged Kevin to prison, tearing a DNA sample from the man in order to classify him as a sex offender. Just when Lucy thought it was all clearing up, an FBI truck sped up to them, and an FBI helicopter flew to them, and an FBI storage facility approached them on foot and they gave her a rectal exam.
"It turns out," said Gilderoy, "That Kevin is an alien! A half-robot half alien, like a terminator or a borg, only with less personality. Sorry, lady."
Lucy stared sadly into the blackness of the night as Kevin was whisked away to his strange fate. However, young as she was, she was sure it would only be weeks before she would marry another, a human this time.
Kevin sent her a letter two weeks later to tell her he'd run off with Ruthie. It wasn't illegal because Ruthie was actually a 28-year-old Mexican. She'd been small enough to replace Lucy's true sister.
Upon learning that the little sister she loved for so many years was actually biologically not related to her, Lucy was cool with not seeing her again. She annoyed her anyway.
THE END
It started earlier that night. Kevin, her husband of two years, had whispered in her ear, "I am damn horny, honey!"
They couldn't have sex in the house, because they lived very close to her parents, and she knew her mother had installed microphones so she could tell if Lucy was having carnal relations. Although Annie Camden frowned upon sex for pleasurable purposes, she did approve of copulation for the purpose of procreation, and she already had clothing for her future grandchildren. Lucy had been freaked out when her mother gave her pointers on what position to insure the conception of a future patriarch for Kevin's bloodline.
Yet as soon as they got to their usual movie theater, finally getting some privacy, hidden by a curtain of darkness from the prying eyes of the three- hundred people around them, it turned out that all three-hundred people were cops. Not from Kevin's precinct, but rather, from a precinct in Arizona. Because cops in Arizona apparently really, really disliked pedophiles, and for some reason, they thought Kevin was at least ten to twenty years older than her.
They swarmed en masse and dragged Kevin to prison, tearing a DNA sample from the man in order to classify him as a sex offender. Just when Lucy thought it was all clearing up, an FBI truck sped up to them, and an FBI helicopter flew to them, and an FBI storage facility approached them on foot and they gave her a rectal exam.
"It turns out," said Gilderoy, "That Kevin is an alien! A half-robot half alien, like a terminator or a borg, only with less personality. Sorry, lady."
Lucy stared sadly into the blackness of the night as Kevin was whisked away to his strange fate. However, young as she was, she was sure it would only be weeks before she would marry another, a human this time.
Kevin sent her a letter two weeks later to tell her he'd run off with Ruthie. It wasn't illegal because Ruthie was actually a 28-year-old Mexican. She'd been small enough to replace Lucy's true sister.
Upon learning that the little sister she loved for so many years was actually biologically not related to her, Lucy was cool with not seeing her again. She annoyed her anyway.
THE END