Disclaimer: For the disclaimer, warnings, etc., please see the first chapter.

Black

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Chapter 4 - The Firsts

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Be good now, lovey. Mrs. Lupin placed kisses on her son's cheeks. We'll be back tomorrow night.

Okay, Mum, Remus said, smiling.

You sure you feel okay, son? Mr. Lupin asked, concerned. I don't want you staying alone if you're still not feeling good.

I'm fine, Dad, Remus insisted, helping his parents to carry their luggage outside. He and his father loaded it into the boot of the car. I'll be perfectly fine by myself. It's only for a day.

If you're sure... Mrs. Lupin kissed him again.

I'm sure, Mum. Have fun. Remus kissed her back.

His father squeezed his shoulder. Okay, then. But be sure to call if you need us, all right?

Remus stepped back as his parents got into the car. He waved until they were out of sight, then went back inside. His stomach was full of nervous butterflies, and he thanked God for letting him off easily. His parents were off to visit his aunt in Bristol, and were going to spend the night. And even better, his sister, Serena, was spending the night at a friend's house. He was going to be the only one home - meaning, of course, that no one would miss him, no matter how long he spent with Sirius.

The rest of the afternoon passed at a snail's pace; though Remus tried to distract himself with homework, the newspaper, and the telly in turn, he just couldn't concentrate. His mind kept repeating over and over, I'm going to see Sirius again!' A very sappy way to feel, and it made Remus feel a little ridiculous, but no matter.

Finally, at seven-thirty, Remus couldn't stand waiting around the house any longer. He locked up and left, thinking that it might be a tad easier just to wait outside the sweet shop. It was beginning to grow dark as he walked, humming tunelessly to himself, his hands in his pockets.

But he received a nasty shock when he reached Baker's. He was just about to go in, hoping to buy some licorice to eat while he waited, when the door opened and Augustus Williams stepped out, clutching a large sack.

Their eyes met. Williams' eyes narrowed dangerously, and a ham-sized hand reached out and seized Remus by the collar. He backed Remus against the wall of the building, dropping his bag of sweets. Remus glanced at the door, praying Mr. Baker had seen it and would come to break it up, but Mr. Baker's back was turned at the moment as he refilled bins of candy.

Hello, Lupin, Williams breathed. He thumped Remus up against the wall, making Remus' teeth chatter. Thought you were smart the other day, eh? With your little boyfriend to save you? His brown eyes glimmered with malice. I don't see him here right now. In fact, I don't see anyone here right now.

It was true; the streets were deserted. Remus gulped.

You should have known I'd get back at you, Williams snarled, shaking him again. I'd love to bash in your boyfriend's face, but as he's not here, I might as well settle for you. His other hand drew back, forming a fist. Remus closed his eyes, close to tears.

But the punch never came. Instead, he heard Williams growl, You again!

Remus' eyes flew open. Sirius was there, holding Williams' fist, glaring at him through a haze of cigarette smoke. A slow smile played across Williams' lips. I guess it doesn't matter. I've been wanting to settle things with you. He let go of Remus, who slumped against the wall and rubbed at his throat.

Williams rolled up his sleeves. Come on, let's go.

I don't think so, Sirius said calmly. Unless you want someone to see you. He nodded towards the sweet shop, where Mr. Baker had finally turned around and was peering suspiciously out the window at the three boys. But if you want to settle things, I'll be more than happy to meet you another time.

There was a pause. Williams seemed to be weighing the choices in his mind. Remus tugged at the sleeve of Sirius' trenchcoat, trying to get his attention, but Sirius ignored him.

Right, then, Williams growled at last. Fine, then, pretty boy - I'll take you on. The play park. Tomorrow night. He picked up his bag of candy and stormed off.

Sirius lit a cigarette and looked down at Remus, who was still clinging to his sleeve.

Are you mad?! Remus hissed. He's lots bigger than you! He'll hurt you badly, maybe even kill you -

Size is no guarantee of power, Sirius said. Come on.

Remus followed, holding onto his arm. How can you be so calm? You don't know him like I do. He'll get himself a bunch of thugs, probably - you could get really hurt!

Sirius stopped and cupped Remus' chin in his hand. Leave it to me. I'll be fine. Now drop it, okay?

Remus really didn't want to, but he nodded. Sirius smiled and started walking again.

Where are we going?

My house, Sirius said. My family's gone, no one will care.

Remus realised he hadn't seen anyone at Sirius' house the first time he had been there. Where are they?

Sirius replied, flicking his cigarette butt away.

What are they doing there?

Beats me. I don't really care.

Why not?

Sirius sighed, using his free hand to brush his hair out of his eyes. I don't want to talk about it.

But -

Shut up. Sirius' eyes were suddenly dangerous. Remus shut. It was obviously a sensitive topic. He didn't say another word as they strolled through the alleyways. Instead, he rested his head on Sirius' shoulder and closed his eyes, holding onto Sirius' arm. There was no one to see them, and Sirius didn't tell him to let go, so it was all right.

They reached Sirius' townhouse just as the stars began to show up in the velvety sky. They kicked off their shoes at the door and hung up their coats.

D'you want something to eat? Sirius asked.

Remus hadn't eaten before he left his house; he had been far too nervous.

He followed Sirius into the kitchen. It was decorated mainly in yellow, with ancient-looking copper appliances. Remus took a seat at the chipped table as Sirius pulled out a can of soup and a battered saucepan. Remus looked around curiously at the small room, too polite to comment on its shabby appearance. Instead, he wondered why Sirius didn't want to talk about his family, and what they were doing in Germany without him.

Sirius put a bowl of soup in front of him and handed him a spoon.

Remus dipped his spoon into his soup, stirring it around and blowing on it.

Is that guy always after you?

Remus asked, surprised. Well - I wouldn't say he's after me - I don't know, I'm just not very athletic or strong or anything like that, so he and his friends pick on me.

Sirius slurped some of the broth directly from the bowl. He had left lipstick smears on the rim, Remus noted with amusement, as the raven-haired boy set it back down. Are you sure? He's a little fixated on you, isn't he? Don't you remember what I told you the first time I met him?

Yeah, but - Remus chewed thoughtfully on a spoonful of soggy vegetables. Don't you think you're going a little overboard?

He was trying to get his hands down your trousers, Sirius said mildly, spreading margarine on a piece of bread and handing it to him.

Thanks for reminding me, Remus mumbled, taking a bite.

Sorry. How long has this been going on, anyway?

Um - ever since I started going to that school. He's a year above me.

I bet you'd like him gone, wouldn't you?

Well, I won't pretend I wouldn't be happy if he transferred to another school or moved across the country or something... why?

Sirius shrugged. Never mind.

They ate the rest of their meal in silence. Remus insisted on helping Sirius with the dishes afterwards, even though they didn't have much to wash. After they were done, they went up to Sirius' room, stretching out on his bed.

Remus fiddled absentmindedly with a corner of the blanket. He wanted to ask Sirius about the other night, why he hadn't answered when Remus confessed that he loved him. He looked up at the other boy. Sirius -

He was cut off as Sirius kissed him, his arms sliding around Remus' waist and pulling him close. Remus closed his eyes and kissed back, his heart pounding as Sirius rolled over so Remus was pinned underneath him. Sirius deepened the kiss, his hands roaming over Remus' chest, pulling his t-shirt out of his jeans and slipping his hands up underneath it.

Ah - Remus gasped as they broke the kiss. Sirius' hands were cold, but he didn't protest, even when Sirius gently pulled his shirt off, then shed his own. They kissed again, Remus' fingers trailing delicately over the snow-white skin of Sirius' chest. He felt breathless and a little dizzy, his heart pounding so loudly he could swear Sirius could hear it.

Oh - Sirius nipped at his earlobe, then placed kisses down the side of his neck and across his shoulders. His hands moved to Remus' fly, undoing the button, pulling the zipper down.

Sirius - what - Remus felt dazed.

Sirius kissed the tip of his nose. It's okay. I'll be gentle.

But - ah - Remus gasped as Sirius' fingers slipped into his jeans. Sirius -

Sirius whispered. His voice was husky. Just trust me, okay?

But - He stopped protesting and groaned softly when Sirius stroked him gently with one finger.

Will you trust me?

Remus gasped, as Sirius slid his jeans down his hips. Yes, Sirius, I love you -

Sirius kissed him, slipping out of his own jeans and pulling Remus into an embrace. The brunette gasped as Sirius pushed against him with a groan of longing.

Remus -

Go ahead, Remus moaned, closing his eyes, reaching down to touch Sirius. Please, Siri -

Siri. That's cute. Sirius was panting, looking down at him, his hair falling in his eyes. His lipstick was smeared, sweat beading his forehead. He licked his lips, prying Remus' knees apart. It's going to hurt.

I don't care, Remus whispered. He was beautiful, tawny bangs tumbling into his eyes, a near-desperate expression on his face. I love you, it's all right - I want you inside me -

Ready or not, here I come, Sirius smirked. Remus closed his eyes and bit his lip, steeling himself. With a moan, Sirius thrust forward.



---

Remus lay perfectly still afterward, the blankets pulled up to his chin, Sirius' arm around his waist. Sirius was smoking a cigarette, looking very disheveled and sexy in the moonlight. Remus wanted to get up and go to the bathroom, but he doubted he could even stand right now, let alone walk. The backs of his thighs felt unpleasantly sticky.

You okay? Sirius asked him. Remus was pleased to hear a note of concern in his voice.

I'm fine. Remus sighed and moved a little closer. It hurt to move, but he ignored the pain.

No you're not. But Sirius only chuckled and planted a tobacco-smelling kiss on his forehead. I did warn you.

Ugh. How big of you.

Sirius snickered at the unintentional double entendre, then fell silent. Remus was beginning to get pleasantly drowsy despite the circumstances. He sighed happily, resting his head on Sirius' shoulder and closing his eyes.



Remmie? Remus opened his eyes, propping himself up on his elbow and looking down at Sirius in surprise. Um - what?

You told me you loved me.

Oh - Remus felt himself heating up and knew he was blushing. It was a good thing it was dark. Well - I - I meant it. I really do love you. I mean - it's silly and all - we haven't even known each other for very long - but... when I met you.. it was...I don't know. I can't help it.

I know you can't. Sirius leaned up slightly to kiss his jaw. And I've got to tell you something - when we first met, I was a little annoyed at you - I thought you were just another rich, private-school snob. But... He brushed Remus' bangs out of his eyes. You've grown on me since then.

Like a fungus, Remus said, and they broke into giggles.

No, really. Sirius' voice was gentle. I've gotten used to you. And... I love you too.

Remus' heart leapt. Y- you do?

Yeah. I wouldn't just do it with anyone, you know. You're the one I wanted to be with.

Remus brushed away the tears that were trickling down his cheeks.

Great. Stop crying, okay? Sirius was smiling. I like you better when you're happy.

I am happy.

Sirius chuckled and pulled Remus back down to lay beside him. Go to sleep.

Remus felt as if he would burst with joy. He snuggled close, putting an arm around his lover. His lover... the words sounded so good. It was like an enormous weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Sirius stayed awake until well past midnight, smoking and stroking Remus' hair. The other boy slept soundly in his arms, a small smile on his lips. Sirius couldn't help but smile as well, stubbing out his last cigarette and leaning close to whisper in Remus' ear.

Don't worry. After this... you'll never have to worry about those blokes again. I'll make sure of it.

---

The next morning dawned bright and sunny. Remus cracked open one eye, then the other, blinking sleepily around at his surroundings. Sunlight glinted on red-and-ivory wallpaper and scarred, dark-mahogany furniture. Sirius was asleep beside him, breathing softly, the light making gold highlights in his ebony hair.

Remus sat up, memories of last night washing over him. The encounter with Williams... coming home with Sirius... making love in this bed. He smiled, looking down at Sirius and brushing stray strands of hair out of his lover's face. He swung his legs out of bed, wincing slightly, and pulled on the first garment he saw - Sirius' t-shirt from the night before. It was black and hung to his knees. Quietly, so as not to wake Sirius, Remus slipped out of the room and tiptoed down the hall to the bathroom.

On his way back, a photograph on the wall caught his eye. Curiously, he stopped to look. It appeared to be a family photograph. He recognized Sirius at once, standing with his hands on the shoulders of a stately-looking woman. She had long black hair, streaked with white, and dark blue eyes. Beside her sat a boy who looked younger than Sirius. He had black hair as well, falling about halfway to his shoulders, and blue eyes. There was something vaguely unpleasant about his smile, but Remus couldn't place it. Behind him stood a very tall man with steel-grey hair, thick eyebrows, and a walrus moustache. His eyes were black and narrowed slightly. All four were dressed in dark colours, and the only jewelry on any of them was the earring in Sirius' left ear and the antique brooch at the woman's throat.

That's my family. Sirius spoke from behind him, making Remus jump. He turned to see Sirius scowling at the picture. His hair was hanging in his eyes and he was dressed only in his jeans, which were unbuttoned. He sighed, the scowl leaving his face, brushing his hair out of his way and lighting a cigarette.

I'm sorry - I was just looking - Remus said nervously.

Don't be. It's okay. Sirius took the picture off the wall, looking at it glumly. My mum, he muttered, pointing to the woman. Adhara. Kid next to her is my little brother, Regulus. And that's my da. Cépheus. He's always been mad that Regulus and I look more like Mum than like him. He exhaled a stream of smoke at his father's image. I hate them, he said simply, hanging the picture back up.

Remus was taken aback.

Sirius just shook his head. Never mind. I don't feel like talking about it right now. How about some breakfast?

Remus followed Sirius to the kitchen, slightly puzzled.

After eating breakfast, taking a quick shower, and getting dressed in his own clothes again, Remus was escorted home by Sirius. They strolled along casually, holding hands. Remus didn't care that he was late for school. He just liked being with Sirius... his lover. All too soon, however, they were standing in front of Remus' house.

How are you going to explain it this time? Sirius asked.

My parents are away. They won't be back until tonight. I'll just lay around looking pathetic, and when they get home I'll tell them I had a relapse.

You're turning into a great liar.

It's not exactly lying. They almost didn't go, they were so worried about me. This is going to make them feel guilty, but... he shrugged.

Sirius kissed his cheek. Sounds like you've got it worked out. They get suspicious, tell them I stayed with you for awhile, okay? I'll back you up.

Remus kissed him. Um - are you still going to... meet Williams tonight?

Don't you even think of coming, Sirius said warningly. I can handle it. Trust me, all right?

All right, Remus sighed. But I can't help worrying.

No need. Now get your cute arse in there and start faking sick. Ta, luv.

Remus watched him until he disappeared down the street, biting his lip uncertainly. He knew he couldn't sneak out at night to see if Sirius really was going to be okay, not if his parents were to believe he was still sick. Keep him safe, God, he mumbled to himself, heading inside.

---

Augustus Williams climbed over the locked gate of the play park, dropping heavily to the ground. He straightened up and started cautiously forward, his eyes darting from side to side. He wasn't going to let that little bitch's boyfriend sneak up on him.

But the little bitch's boyfriend didn't even try. He was leaning against the fence that surrounded the children's swings, his long hair and the hem of his trenchcoat moving slowly in the breeze. The end of a cigarette glowed in the dark like a single, watchful eye, and the smell of the smoke drifted to Williams' nose. He wasn't even trying to hide.

There you are, Williams growled, rolling up his sleeves. The moonlight gave the bloke a weird appearance, making his skin bluish-white and even paler in contrast to his dark hair and clothes, his eyes hidden deep in pockets of shadow.

Here I am, Sirius agreed softly, dropping his cigarette and grinding it out.

I thought for sure you'd chicken out, Williams sneered.

And here I was thinking the same about you, came the cool reply.

I'm not a coward, Williams spat, furious at the insinuation.

And neither am I. I think we're pretty evenly matched, don't you? It's much more polite to pick on people your own size.

What are you talking about?

Remus. He's smaller than you, sweeter, and he'd never hurt anyone. But for some reason, you're determined to either beat the stuffing out of him, or shag him senseless.

Lupin's a bitch, Williams snarled. He deserves what I give him.

his voice was still calm, quiet, polite. He moved forward, so they were standing less than an inch apart. You know what? I think you deserve what I give you.

Pain suddenly exploded in Williams' throat ; hot liquid sprayed his chest. He gasped and tried to speak, but he could suddenly make no noise. In the moonlight, he could see he a dark stain spreading down his shirt. He wiped at it frantically, looking at his hands - blood. Blood! His own blood!

The blade came down again, burying itself in his shoulder up to the hilt. Williams let out a scream of pain no one could hear, reaching for the knife to pull it out of his shoulder, but it was gone.

Sweet dreams, the cool voice said, before the knife plunged into Williams' stomach.

To Be Continued...

(A/N: I have to address an issue here. Smoking. This is the only story I've written so far in which Sirius smokes. I actually prefer a smoke-free Siri over a tobacco-stinky one, but there was no getting around the fact that he looks hot with a cigarette between his painted lips. (Yum, yum.) But naturally, this was the seventies, so people were not as enlightened about the dangers of cigarettes as they are today. Kids, don't try this at home.)