When I came downstairs this morning, I knew something was up.  Someone new was in our house.  I could feel it in my bones.  I could also hear it from the kitchen, and see it on the coat rack.  So I went into the kitchen, bathed in morning sunlight…and wondered why I was so poetic this morning.  Freaky.  But anyway, a fairly old man was sitting at our breakfast table.  He turned around and choked when he saw me.  Literally.  He started choking on the omelet he was eating and Mom had to walk over and whack him on the back a couple times.

            "I'd like you to meet someone honey," Mom said.  She was obviously tense.  I looked at her and back at the stranger.

            "You better not be another godfather."  After assurances that, for once, this was in fact a blood relative, Mom introduced me to my Grandpa Summers.  He still looked very startled.

            "Jenny," I told him, shaking his limp hand.  He kept on gaping at me.  Why is it that no one in this family has any manners except for me?

            "Buffy…you never told me…" He whispered very shaken.  Mom sighed and turned back to make me an omelet too.

"When was I supposed to tell you, Dad?  After you left for Europe and didn't leave any phone number?  You're lucky I love Sunnydale so much.  You never would have found me if I had moved."  Now Grandpa looked very depressed.  Apparently another poor father figure in the family.  Maybe it's genetic for women in my bloodline to marry losers.  Now my future looks bright.

            "But…a daughter?  And married," he cut off and looked sharply at her, "You are married, aren't you?"  Hey, you asked exactly what I've been wondering for all these years!  Mom blushed.

            "Of course Dad.  It…it wasn't a normal wedding but…it'll hold up in courts."  She nervously twisted what must be her wedding ring.  Funny I had never noticed it before.  Wait a second.  Then why is my last name Summers?  If this is Mom's dad, Grandpa Summers…

            "So you're now Buffy…?"  Jeez this man is psychic.

            "Summers.  William took my name."

            "William, eh?" Grandpa didn't look very pleased.  But then, it's probably a shock to come home to find your daughter married and with a kid.  I know I'd freak out.  Suddenly, I realized we'd been making much more racket then we were usually allowed to in the morning.  That meant…I listened closely.  Yup.  Just as I feared.  Heavy footsteps from downstairs.  Dad does not sound happy.  The basement door creaked open and Grandpa Summers jumped out of his skin.

            "Buffy, where the bloody hell is my mug?" He demanded, squinting into the kitchen from the darkened door way.  Ooh, lovely picture.  Dad in skull and crossbones boxer shorts with a long black bathrobe.  You can see his knees.  God are they white!

            "I'll be right down.  We have company, so be nice," Mom gave him a meaningful stare that clearly said "Go-back-down-right-this-instant-I'll-explain-later".  With a grumble he tramped back downstairs slamming the door behind him.  Freaked out again, Grandpa Summers turned to stare at me when Mom diverted her eyes and went over to fridge to get Dad his "breakfast".

            "Jenny, what was that…thing?  He was so…so pale and thin!  Like a dead body…" he trailed off with a shudder.  I sighed and rolled my eyes.  Somehow I don't think this is going to go over too well.

            "Chill out Grandpa.  That's just my dad."  If he thinks Dad is freaky, wait till he meets the rest of our housemates.

Later

            Hello hello.  Grandpa Summers in the house.  He had various reactions to the different people in the house.  We all converged for dinner, even Dad, Uncle Angel, and Aunt Dru who usually stay in the basement all day until when I'm going to bed.  Here is a list of Grandpa's reactions to each person.

Grandpa Summer's Reactions


Dad: Once he found out that was Dad, he was still totally freaked.  And at dinner he kept on drilling him about jobs, family, friends, he actually had the gall to ask about girls! That is one brave man.

Angel: Uncle Angel gave him the willies.  I think it was the mix of broodiness and pink hair.  It hasn't washed out yet. Ha ha.

Dru: As any normal person would be, he was totally terrified of Dru.  Uncle Giles assured him she was quite harmless, just a little "disoriented".  No, really?

Andrew: Since he was trying to hide a video camera under his sweater with very little success, Grandpa obviously thought he belonged on the bonkers-barge along with Aunt Dru.

Giles: Uncle Giles stopped by, so there was at least two sane people in the house.  Grandpa still seemed pretty wary of him though.

Me: Grandpa Summers was fairly comfortable with me, allowing that I'm the grandchild he didn't know he had.

            So Grandpa's stay here will be interesting, to say the very least.  Wahoo.  More "interesting"-ness.  Someday I am going to find out why all my parent's friends are freaks.  Really.  Yeah, it's totally unlikely.  And you know what?  I'm trying to find my place!  Yeah, sounds corny.  But I seriously need an after school activity.  If I spend too much more time in this house, I am seriously going to scream.  AAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!  Next time, it will be out loud.  I can promise you that.  Or maybe not.  Anyway, in my little "search for my place in the world" I have not got a clue what I'm gonna do.  I was thinking about working with our resident garage band.  I even asked one of the guys if I could help out some way.  And you know what he said?!? I'm not delinquent enough to keep up with their "image"! Come one! I'm a delinquent! I'm bad to the bone! I flunked an English paper! I take more than one spork at lunch just for the hell of it! I cheat at Pretty Pretty Princess!!! Ooh, better burn this page.  Mom would freak if she found out.  PPP is like, her favorite game.  She gets so obsessed with the jewelry.  Anyway…hey! I got info about Dad's old girlfriends!  I'll give a rundown.  First, there was this Cecily girl who he had a crush on but didn't like him.  Then he met Aunt Dru and forgot all about Cecily.  He and Dru were "on again off again" as he said it, and he had a short relationship with some Chinese girl.  Then back with Aunt Dru.  Then there was some lady named Nikki.  He said they wandered the streets for weeks before it ended.  Then back to Aunt Dru.  Then he met Mom.  Apparently they didn't get along at first, and he dated a cheerleader.  Then he fell in love with Mom, convinced her to love him, and they were together.  He says he was a different man before Mom and she "changed" him.  Oh, how sweet.  Gack, too much mush here.  And it's late. Bedtime for little Nibble.