AN: Happy Easter everyone! Here's an Easter present for you all. Sorry it's not chocolate, but it's the best I can do. Warning: Things get a little sad toward the end, and I'm sorry if anything upsets you. I would advise having the Kleenex at hand just in case. But don't worry, nothing's too drastic…
Ameli Stoncius: Hopefully it did rub off on you . I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as you did the last one.
Fuu-sama: Hehe…not so much suspense in this chapter, I promise. Or at least I'll try not to leave it on a dying cliff hanger
aratcorien: Don't worry. Fluff is on its way. And I'll make sure in later chapters that they'll have some peace and quiet, even if it's the last chapter!
Act 7 - History; Home; Grief
The sun was setting behind the tall, fluorescent skyscrapers of the city, dipping the sky a blazing red, the colour of fire. But nothing ceased to exist down below our window as life still bustled with vitality in the busy streets of bright neon lights. It was as if nothing had happened earlier today…as if the skies hadn't darkened the clouds, or death hadn't crawled through the air.
Shaking my head I turned away from the window and saw Fujin still sitting on the floor leaning against her bed, her hands buried deeply in her hands. Ever since we had been dismissed from Laguna, after Kiros and Ward had shown us a place to stay, she had like a statue in that spot, not moving an inch, not uttering a word. I sat down beside her and pulled her motionless form to me, leaning back against the soft blanket. Her arm came to rest over my stomach as she turned on her side, resting her head in the crook of my neck. Rubbing her shoulder with my left hand, I gently nuzzled her face, telling her silently that I was ready to listen.
"HELP," She whispered. "CONFUSED."
"What happened?" I asked.
"VOICE," she said quietly. "DARK."
"What did it say?" I said gently, not wanting to discourage her.
"TAKE PAIN AWAY…SALVATION." I paused for a moment, wondering what it could have meant.
"Fujin, do you remember an old story? A tale of sorcerers long ago?" I asked, remembering the very first line.
"AFFIRMATIVE." She pulled away a little to look at me, and I saw a flicker of fear in her eye. Although I could tell she knew what I was going to say, I felt compelled to explain my opinion.
"Laguna thinks…I think that it's starting again. A new master has been picked for that one lone GF…and - "
"NEGATIVE!" she cried. Tears sprung from her eye as she whispered the same word over and over into my shoulder, her fingers clinging onto the material for dear life. I hushed her sobs, slowly easing her away so I could look at her directly.
"Fujin, you've got to listen to me," I said as seriously as I could, for her grief was tearing me apart. "You can do this. We can do this…I-I won't let anything happen to you…" but the pain etched into her face was all too much for me alone to bear. "Oh Hyne Fujin, please don't look at me like that." I said, my eyes blinking away tears. We fell together, arms locking tightly around each other, cries of fear and sorrow filling the room. Fujin cried louder, and I too felt my eyes become wetter with falling tears, as I gathered her in my arms, hiding my burning face in her white hair. "I won't let you die…I won't let you forget…" I whispered to her, barely audible, and for my own reassurance as we both knew either ending of the sad story.
The first would end in death; the second would end in a broken soul.
I knew our time was short, for Fujin had already begun to change, and holding her in my arms made me want to make sure I had no regrets.
"I love you Fujin. Please remember that. Not matter what happens, I'll always love you." I said. She answered me in the same words and I kissed her quivering mouth.
"ALWAYS." She whispered against me as we remained together until darkness shrouded the small apartment.
---
A loud knock on the door suddenly awoke me from my semi-conscious state and untangling myself from Fujin, who seemed to have fallen asleep, I walked softly to the door. Laguna appeared in the doorway with Kiros and Ward no where in sight, but with him stood the person I least expected to be there.
"Sorry its so late Seifer, but Commander Leonhart is here to see you and Fujin," Laguna said smiling toward the young man beside him. "And also," he said handing me an envelope. "Cid has sent us a warrant for your release." Clapping the younger man on the shoulder he bade us farewell and goodnight and strolled down the corridor, whistling a tune I'd never heard before.
"Come in." I said to my rival, and silently he walked past me and stood in the hallway while I moved past him to wake Fujin. Touching her shoulder lightly, I called her name and slowly her eye fluttered open, the fiery red becoming more raging every time I looked at her. "Fujin, we've got company."
At once she stood up and straightened herself out and we walked together toward the small living room where Leonhart was already waiting for us. I saw his eyes widened for a split second as he looked at Fujin, and I caught his stare, glaring directly back at him, warning him not to make matters worse.
"As Laguna said, Cid has written you a warrant, freeing you of any imprisonment that may be called upon. If you take the time to actually read it, you'll find all the evidence needed to clear your name," he said sounding bored out of his skull. But I could swear to Hyne that he continued mumbling something under his breath, "not that you really deserve it…" Restraining myself from kicking him underneath the coffee table in the centre of the room, I coughed instead.
"Also, following up Fujin's…display of power, Cid sends his warning to you both," he said taking out a letter and placing it on the table. "I'm sure you're more than capable of reading a letter without me having to be here. I'll be staying in Esthar for another few days, so contact Laguna if you so desperately need me." He said coldly.
"Thanks." I said absent-mindedly, taking the letter from the glass-topped surface. I rose to lead Leonhart out, but he refused the offer.
"I'll see myself out." He said bluntly. The door slammed shut, and once again we were left alone in silence all to ourselves.
"NOT CIVIL." Fujin said as she snatched the letter out of my lazy grasp and began reading it.
"He's the one who's not civil." I grumbled leaning back against the sofa, my hands resting behind my head.
"READ." She said handing me Cid's 'warning'. My eyes skimmed over the text, remembering the important pieces of information instantly as old habits kicked in from the war. But I stared in disbelief at what the old man was saying.
"Cid's lost it! Nobody knows about your power except us. Nobody could possibly target you…"
"CID KNEW." Fujin pointed out.
"True," I agreed. "Laguna must have informed him about it…Why do you think he's helping us anyway?" I asked. Fujin only shrugged her shoulders, stifling a yawn in the process.
"TOMORROW," She said taking the letter from my hands once more and setting it down on the table. "SLEEP." Fujin got up and walked toward her bedroom, but I caught her hand before she was out of my grasp from where I sat.
"Rest up." I said before kissing her pale hand. Then when I looked up at her she wore an expression I'd rarely seen.
She smiled.
---
The sunlight streamed in through the slits in the blinds, casting thin lines on the floor and the furniture in the room as I woke up the next morning. Greeted by the strips of light shining right in my face I groaned and turned over, facing the dark material of the sofa I'd chosen to sleep on. But no matter how hard I tried, sleep just wouldn't come back and claim my consciousness. Yawning, I rolled myself out of the sloping cushions and stretched my arms up toward the ceiling, probably resembling the movements of a cat at that moment.
Silence reigned over the rooms as I walked groggily through the apartment, and I guessed that Fujin was possibly still asleep. I pressed my ear against her door, and hearing nothing, I pushed it open. Sure enough the curtains were drawn, and all lay undisturbed. My eyes settled on Fujin's sleeping form, tucked securely underneath the tumbling sea of blankets that rose and fell with her even breathing like the ocean at Balamb harbour. Her short, untidy white hair lay on her pillow like the crashing surf of the waves, and she slept on, her smooth, uncoloured skin like the distant sands of an untouched beach.
I crept into her room padding across the soft carpet, watching her sleep so calmly. This had been one of the first times I'd ever seen her so at peace and I knew at once that this is what life should be like. We shouldn't have to be on edge every minute of the day, but be able to live each day as it comes, being lazy once in a while…
But life as I knew it wasn't like that…yet. We had matters to attend to and set right. Knowing I'd regret it later, I knelt down beside Fujin's bedside and kissed her softly. Her eyebrows furrowed and she began to stir in her awakened sleep. I kissed her again, this time opening her eye. I pulled away before she could fling her hand into my face, laughing slightly as she stared at me, colour returning to her cheeks as she tired to hide her light blush.
"PIG." She said glowering at me.
"Hey, I had no choice, you wouldn't wake up." I smiled, noticing a necklace I'd never seen before hanging low around her neck. A small blue jewel was hooked onto a length of black string that was tied in a secure knot.
"You're still a pig," She said as she kicked away the covers and pushed me out of the room. "I'll be out in a minute." Saying no more she closed the door behind me. Suddenly the telephone rang, making me jump for me brief moment. Answering the irritating noise, a familiar and cheery voice entered my ears.
"Good morning Seifer, its Laguna. Listen, if you give me that warrant I'll file a report that will set you free with no hassle at all."
"All right," I said. "What will happen then?" I said, knowing now that something was definitely wrong and false about this whole affair. Unless Leonhart had told Laguna about the warrant, how could he have known that I have it?
"You'll be completely free to go, but as a sort of parole check, you'll have to live permanently in Esthar for a while," He said. "I can't say exactly how long it will be right now, but I'll let you know as soon as possible." He paused for a moment, and I could imagine him scratching his head in thought. "How about a compromise? I'll let you go away, do whatever, for five days and then you'll come back here and we'll sort things out ok? I'm sure both of you would like a break form all this."
Thinking back to Cid's letter, I realised that these target groups really could be after Fujin, and that they weren't as obvious as one may have first thought. But I'd play along for now…
"Sure," I said. "But what about Rajin? Will he be able to come and stay with us after our trip?" If my suspicions were correct, we'd need all the protection we could get. Laguna paused again before agreeing to my request. "Thanks. I'll bring the warrant later today. Yeah, bye." I said, and I placed the receiver back on the hook just as Fujin walked out of her room.
"WHO?" she inquired.
"Laguna," I said, but the annoying scepticism still plagued my thoughts. "I'm not too sure about all this. Are you?"
"ODD," Fujin agreed. "What did he say?"
"Apparently if I give him the warrant I'll be home free, but we're condemned to live in this place for a while until everything dies down. Also, we get to go away for five days. How does that sound?" I said, listing off the items with my fingers. Fujin smiled at my report and mimicked my actions while she spoke.
"FIRST, COPE. SECOND, TRAP…BUT ADVENTURE."
"That's my Fujin," I said mockingly, ruffling her now brushed hair.
"STOP IT!" she said batting my hand away as she walked into the small kitchen area. Still smiling I walked up behind her and slipped my arms around her thin waist, securely hugging her to me.
"So where do you want to go?" I whispered into Fujin's ear, resting my head against hers. I felt her tremble in my arms as if she was afraid, but her hands came to rest on mine as she naturally leaned back into me. No reply came for several minutes, and I was beginning to wonder if Fujin had forgotten my question, but before I could utter a word, her answer came.
"HOME."
I sighed, somehow knowing that that would be her destination. "But where is home Fujin?"
"MY HOME." I blinked in succession. This was the first time she had ever mentioned anything about her past, let alone where she'd grown up.
"Ok Fujin. We'll go home."
---
I dropped off the warrant to Laguna and as soon as I came back we left for Fujin's homeland. Laguna had kindly given us some supplies to take with us and warily I had taken them. I couldn't let him think that I was suspicious or that there was anything to be suspicious about. It had taken a good two days to even get there, Fujin leading the way all the time. We had hired out chocobos to ride for the remainder of the journey after a small air transport had dropped us off not too far from the rendezvous point where we would meet them again at the end of our trip.
It definitely felt good to be out in the wild again, the wind blowing naturally against my face, Hyperion strapped to my back, and the smells of the forest being carried in the breeze. This was the best way to live a washed up life. Society no longer welcomed me and so the only place I could turn to was the raw wilderness that wasn't tied down by rules or judgement. Here I could truly be myself, at ease and relaxed.
"NEARLY THERE." Fujin called over her shoulder, and sure enough up ahead I could see the shapes of a settlement. A river ran down below the hilltop town in the small and shallow valley, emptying out in the vast lake of pure, clear water. But as we neared, I saw that the shapes of what I thought were houses were burnt down ruins and the dark walls were charred wood. The smell of death and flames hung around the hill, stretching right down to the plains below.
The air became a cold chill and I shivered in the death-ridden atmosphere. Our chocobos were also uptight and unsure about the town for they refused to move an inch further toward the ghost village. Rooting their large feet into the ground, they leaned their yellow heads down to the grass to attempt to graze, but found that all the plants were dead. I jumped off the saddle and hoped that they wouldn't be too scarred to stay here for a while until we came back.
I walked with Fujin up the forsaken slope, every now and again stealing small glances of her face. Her expression seemed not to be one of joy, or one of sadness. I couldn't tell what kind of song her heart was singing, whether it was lamenting or bouncing with vitality.
"So this is home huh?" I said breaking the slightly unnerving silence.
"AFFIRMATIVE." She said without any noticeable trace of emotion.
"It's nice." I said eventually. I knew I was lying slightly as in the air I smelled death and everywhere my eyes stopped lay rubble and ruins of houses. Some skeletons still lined the streets as we entered the eerily quiet place, some propped up by stones and slabs of splintered wood so they looked like they were calling out to us, begging the torture to stop…
We entered the square where a fountain still diligently flowed with water, but now the probably once clear crystal basin was infested with moss and algae, the stagnant water most likely housing all sorts of creatures under the green velvet skin. Mist surrounded us, the air damp with moisture and I suddenly felt the icy breath of the wind sweep past me.
Hopefully we wouldn't stay here very long.
I continued to follow Fujin through winding cobblestone streets, dark two storey houses looming above us menacingly. Keeping close behind her I tried not to think about what could have happened here to transform this possibly beautiful, peaceful village into the hell-hole that it now lay dormant as. Despite the morbidity of the town, I could still picture the grass shining in the sunshine, the voices running through the crowded streets happily, and the clean splashing of water from the river…
"HERE." Fujin said suddenly. We had stopped outside a house that seemed to have survived quite well when comparing to others in the street. The two floors were still visible although being fairly charred and smelling of rotting flesh… I looked at Fujin, and it was then that I saw her eye soften and a smile creep to her lips. But I also saw the threatening tears and the trembling of her hands. This must have been where she lived.
Placing my hands on her shoulders I kissed her cheek, wanting to give her some strength to hold herself together, for I knew I wouldn't be able to bear it if her strong walls collapsed. I wouldn't be able to heal the pain or make up for the losses she experienced…All I would be able to do was to carry this fragile woman until she could fend for herself.
'But Fujin wouldn't want me to do everything for her. I know she would want to sort this out of her own…' I thought.
"If only they could see me now." I hardly heard it, but I felt moved to hold her in my arms.
"They do see you Fujin. They're watching you right now." I said stroking her hair.
"All they would see is a monster." But before I could protest Fujin shifted in my arms, sliding the soft black material away form her face.
"Fujin - "
"LOOK AT ME!" she shouted cutting me off. Suddenly I felt a gust of wind whirl around me; forcing Fujin away from me, but I held her fast in my arms. Looking down at her, I knew instantly that the wind was the furious self-anger she held inside her. Her teeth were clenched and her hands digging painfully into my arms as she stared up at me; sorrow filling her eyes.
The wind died away, and I gently removed Fujin's clawing fingers from my sleeves. Taking one of her hands, I led her shaking fingers up to my forehead and slowly trailed her fingers along my scar. All the while her eyes were unsure as she stared up at me. Then placing her hand back at her side, I brushed away the white, silver strands of hair that lay across her face and traced her scars just like I had done in Deling when I'd first seen what lay underneath the mysterious eye patch. Fujin shivered at my touch, and I brought my hand away to rest on her cheek.
"There's nothing wrong Fujin. You're no different from before," I said looking at her directly. She tried to avert her eyes but I made her look at me. "Fujin please…You aren't a monster at all, not even close." I whispered.
She smiled a sad smile and pushed my hands down from her face. Punching me lightly on the shoulder she turned her back and walked slowly toward her home. I sighed, hoping to Hyne that she would someday see herself as ordinary and not some side show freak. It was true that she was different, but we're all different, that's what's makes us human. And although it was a mixed blessing, Fujin was special. She was the one, out of everyone in the world to be chosen to be that damned GF's mistress.
I followed Fujin into her home, curious to see what kind of life she led up until disaster struck her village. I wandered away from her, roaming through each room until I came to the living room. An old fire, which had long slept and died away behind the grill, lay blackened in the centre of the wall while a dusty rug embroidered with intricate patterns lay on the floor. Not everything had been lost… The street facing wall had been torn away though, leaving the house open to thieves and bandits who were merciless enough to ransack a dead village. Beams and rubble lay in a heap to the side, black and jagged silver lines contrasting in the dim morning light. But as I looked harder, I saw the bony hand pleading for help from within the stones and wood. I walked over and heaved the large and weighty fragments of building material away and there rested a long since decayed body turned over on its stomach as if it had been lying over something that was no longer there. The overwhelming smell of rotting flesh almost made me throw up and I clamped my hand over my face in disgust. But as I looked further still, I could see something else trapped innocently underneath the neighbouring pile of heavy boulders. Holding my breath I shoved the pieces of fallen wood and broken roof tiles into the middle of the deserted street and this time I retched at the sight.
It was so sickeningly sad that I doubled over, emptying my stomach in drowning pity. The two bodies lay side by side, their skeleton hands clasping each other's even in death. Their heads were turned toward each other, as they lay on their fronts, a necklace of some kind still hanging around their non-existent necks.
"Oh Hyne." I said stepping back. I wanted to retch again, but I was left with the ghastly swimming of nausea in my head as I looked away. "The jewels…" I whimpered like a scared boy. "They're exactly the same." I broke down in sobs of compassion. "Fujin…I'm so sorry." I whispered in between my gasping breaths.
Shaking violently, my head buzzed with dizziness but I stood on my feet and carefully replaced the stones and wood over the resting bodies. They wouldn't want to have been moved and torn eternally apart by a stranger…They deserved at least to remain together…
Leaving some wood free from the pile of rubble, I stuck two long beams up right into the peak of stones. Nobody would want to be lost forever, and so I built them grave posts, tying the horizontal beam with the very rug I had seen earlier. Tearing it into strips, I bound the two pieces together, saying a silent prayer as I worked, hoping that they would pass on with peace and watch over their daughter until she and I joined them.
Making sure that they were steady, I walked back inside the house, tears falling freely down my cheeks. Through my own cries, I heard someone crying upstairs and I made my way up the creaky wooden stairs and followed the sound of the grieving soul. At the end of my trail I saw Fujin lying on a bed that was far too small for her, her eyes facing the broken window on the far wall in front of her, looking out over the dark green hills and plains that stretched for miles around. She too was crying, and I came beside her as she sat up to greet me. She made no effort to wipe away her tears or pretend she was really all right, for I was crying too. Opening my arms to her she gladly ran into my chest and we both cried together, mourning her parent's death and the death of her home.
I'm sure neither one of us truly knew why we were both crying or why we needed no words to express anything at all. All I knew was that I would never forget this day when we both cried together, sharing in each other's history, their lives and their losses.