A glowing ember burning hot and burning slow

Deep within I'm shaken by the violence of existing for only you

(Sarah McLachlan - Do What You Have to Do)

Chapter Thirteen: The Truth Is Spoken

Hermione awoke to a darkened room. Logically, she knew that it had to be daylight, but the dingy windows allowed very little light through. Glancing around the room, she noticed that her clothes were strewn about across the floor. She took a deep, shaky breath and rolled over, coming face to face with Remus.

His eyes were still closed, and she realized how peaceful he looked while he was resting. It was almost as if years off worry and care simply slipped away. For a moment, Hermione was certain she was looking at the fifteen-year-old boy she had known in the past. Her eyes trailed over his upper body. The blanket was pooled around his waist and his broad, muscular chest lay open and exposed.

Glancing down, she noticed the scars that were scattered across his flesh. She reached a hand out, running her fingertips along the longest of them all. It curved from his shoulder down to his navel, and it looked to her, as if it had been particularly deep. She thought about what had to have happened to him to give him such a mark, and she winced inside. He had been through so much in his life, more pain than he could ever possibly deserve.

Hermione felt hot, wet tears stream down her face. She couldn't imagine all the heartache that he had had to endure the past twenty years of his life, and it was all her fault. I could have spared him all of this, if only I had stayed, if only I hadn't been so selfish, she thought. But was it selfish of her to want to go home? She hadn't really belonged there, had she?

"Hermione?"

She gasped, looking up at him. His eyes were opened slightly, searching hers for something. A trace of what she was thinking, perhaps? "I'm... I'm s... sorry," she stuttered, drawing her hand away from him and next to her own body.

Remus reached up, brushing a few stray strands of hair from her face. "You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm the one who should apologize." He looked at her tenderly. "You're so young. I should have known better than... you aren't even of age yet."

It was dark, but Hermione could barely make out the blush that was creeping up to his cheeks again. "Actually," she started, hesitantly, "I was apologizing for waking you. I was touching..." she reached a hand out, placing her fingertips against the longest scar once more.

He looked down and sighed. "They've been there for so long. I sometimes forget about them, you know? They're like those obnoxious birthmarks that are always there but never thought of. It's all in the past now."

"Remus..." she whispered, "I know that I'm young, but I wanted this. I was the one who initiated it, and I have no regrets at all. I love you, and I know that what we did may have been a little... rushed... but I don't want to be without you for another minute. I hope you understand. For me, it's only been a few months, but for you, it's been twenty years. Don't you feel it? We're connected somehow. We have been since the first time you kissed me, by the lake."

Remus nodded. "I understand completely. I spent almost every moment of almost every day wishing you were by my side. What happened last night... well, it's something I've been dreaming about since I was a sixteen year old boy, as you so nicely put it." He chuckled a little. "As for that kiss... I seem to remember you running away from me."

Hermione laughed, "Well, I was a bit shocked. After all, I couldn't very well tell you, but I knew you were going to be my Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. That was a bit awkward, you know. Snogging my future professor and all."

Remus grinned, "Well, how does it feel to have snogged your former professor?"

Hermione noticed his grin and smiled even wider. It was good to see him happy once more. "It feels rather nice actually." She propped herself up on one elbow, resting her hand on his chest and looking down at him. "What's going to happen now? What do you think everyone will say?"

He seemed to sober up immediately, and Hermione regretted saying anything. She silently willed his smile to return, but it did not. "I suppose we'll have to tell them, won't we? I'm not sure what they'll say, but hopefully they'll accept it. I've waited too long to lose you again." His blushed seemed to deepen, though Hermione doubted that was truly possible. "Perhaps we should hold off on doing... this... again until after you're of age though."

"It's a year. What's a year really?" she asked flippantly.

He sighed. "In a few months, you'll be at school once more. It will have to wait, Hermione. We must be adult about this. After all, had you stayed, you would be an adult, and that's what I'd like to think of you as being."

"Are you embarrassed that I'm so young?" she asked worriedly.

"Not at all. Actually, you make me feel quite roguish. I like this youthful feeling."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Well, I suppose I'm good for something, then." She smiled down at him, "I must say that I'm pleasantly surprised by this sarcastic, fun-loving version of you. It's quite nice compared to the withdrawn, moody one."

He shrugged as best he could lying down. "I can't make any promises about not being withdrawn and moody sometime, but I'll try my best to be good around you." She grinned, then dropped back down beside him, turning her head to look into his eyes.

They lay there in silence for a few moments, just basking in each other's warmth and love. "What are we going to do when I go back to Hogwarts?" she asked suddenly, sitting up to look at him more clearly.

He groaned. She knew that this was the last thing he wanted to discuss right now, but she felt it to be a bit important. "Well," he started, "I suppose I could come visit you on Hogsmeade weekends. Technically, I could come to the school, but we wouldn't be permitted to have much interaction. It would have to stay strictly on a student, former-professor level, and I doubt that I could handle it to be honest." He sighed. "In fact, if we're being honest, I may as well tell you that allowing you to go off to school is going to be torture to me. I would rather you not be out of my sight, ever."

Hermione settled back in beside him, smiling slightly. "I'm glad because when school is done, I don't intend on being out of your sight, ever again." Leaning in, she pressed a light kiss against his temple before rolling over and standing up.

"Where are you going exactly?" he asked curiously.

She turned to him and smiled. "Just to take a shower." She picked up her clothes, turning to look back at him as she straightened. "You really are going to take this not allowing me out of your sight thing seriously, aren't you?"

Remus nodded, "Of course. I may as well start now, you know."

"I expected as much," she said. She mock sighed, but knew that the mischievous twinkle in her eyes betrayed her true feelings. "I'll be in there if you need me," she said, pointing toward the bathroom door.

Hermione walked in and shut the door behind her with a click. Dropping her clothes on the floor, she turned back to the door and smiled, ticking down on her fingers until it would open once more.

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Author's Note: I initially regretted what I had written in the last chapter, feeling that it was a bit rushed, but I decided to leave it and worked that whole discussion in somewhere. I realize this is quite out of character for both of them, but you have to realize that he's been waiting twenty years, and she truly has been through a lot in the past few months. This has changed the both of them a great deal from canon. If you have any major issues with this, leave it in a review. I suppose. Either way, it happened, and I doubt that I'm going to go back and rewrite it.

Oh, and thanks again to all my fantastically faithful reviewers. I adore you all!