AN: I always wondered why Siri was the way she was. This is what I came up with. Enjoy! Please read and review everyone!

"…I will be back later this week."

While Siri knew she should be paying attention to the Jedi she was with, she was more excited, and nervous to see her family again. While most Younglings were not allowed to stay in contact with their parents, Siri was a special case. She hadn't been discovered to be Force sensitive until it was almost too late. She had been a week away from turning two years old.

           Now she was visiting her family, more than likely for the last time.  Until she became a Knight. That wasn't a rule, but she had missed her family.  That was one of the reasons she was allowed back.  To see her family and have all emotional attachments ended in a way that would allow Siri the time to separate herself from memories and bring herself to the reality that she was a Jedi.  Jedi were not allowed to be attached.

However, Siri wasn't certain that this would help her learn to distance herself.  She trained with the other children at the Temple but unlike the others, she could remember her family. Her parents had only wanted the best for her, and when they had discovered she was Force sensitive, they had allowed her to be taken to the Temple. It was still hard for the five year old though. She had been apart from her family for three years, but she could still remember them clearly. Her mother's smile and perfume, that she remembered whenever walking past some flowers in one of the atriums. It was comforting, and Siri liked to go there to remember her.  Her mother had tucked her into bed every night, kissing her forehead, and always telling Siri that she loved her.

            Then there was her father, with his strong, yet kind demeanor, had always won over much of his eldest daughter's heart. She remembered times when he would pick her up after he got home from work, and spin in a circle with her. No matter how often it happened, Siri always smiled. After dinner, and catching up on the holonews, he would pull her onto his lap, and tell her a story.  Some were scary, and some were funny.  Each one was different and Siri looked forward to the time for the story every night.

There was also her younger sister, who Siri had never gotten to know. The young Jedi was worried about this part of her trip the most.  What if her parents had replaced her with this new child, Teka.  She was born a week after Siri had left, and was now three.

Upon reaching the house, Siri felt herself pause.  It was a close enough walk from where they had landed, Siri only carrying a knapsack full of clothes and a few holos.  She could feel her heart pounding in anticipation, mouth dry.  Was this the best idea?

Before Siri's caretaker could knock on the front door, it opened, and a fairly young couple stood there, a little girl peeking from behind them.

Siri froze, refusing to rush to them or shout.  If she did, she was afraid the Jedi would change her mind and take her back to the Temple.

Apparently her parents felt the same way. She could see how happy they were to see her, but looking in their eyes.  They remained calm and professional and invited both Siri and the Knight in.  The Knight refused and gave a nod to show that Siri was allowed to.  "I will see you five days."

Siri gave a nod to show she understood than gave a bow to the Knight to show her respect. Her features remained calm even as her heart was hammering in her chest, and she was certain her palms must have been clammy.

The Jedi shook her parents' hands, and Siri could see that they hadn't changed from how she remembered them.

Her mother, Sabah, had straight blonde hair like Siri's, which hung past her shoulders.  She also had given her daughter the captivating, bright blue eyes.  She was dressed in a flowing ankle length black skirt, with a red tunic.  She wore simple sandals on her feet, with her wedding ring the only jewelry to be seen. 

Her father, Temol, had short, light brown hair and intense green eyes.  He stood close to six feet tall, and the boots he wore made him appear a few inches taller. He wore tan pants and a forest green colored tunic.  Siri noted his silver wedding band as well.

Then Siri's eyes fell on the sister she had never met.  Teka, hung back slightly, watching Siri.  The two girls clearly were related, with similar facial features.  Teka also had blonde hair, though it was a few shades darker than Siri's.  Her sparkling eyes were also blue, but with a hint of green that she had inherited from her father.  The younger sister wore a blue dress that fell to her knees with matching dress shoes, her hair half pulled back.

While Siri was looking at all of them, her caretaker had left, nearly silently.

Now, the five year old realized she was alone with them, bag still over her shoulder.  Her parents and sister looked at her, while she looked at them.

A short moment passed, and then all of a sudden, Siri felt herself being hugged tight by her mother.  Siri hugged her back and taking in deep breath, she could smell the perfume, which was just as she had remembered.

"Siri…we have missed you," Sabah whispered, picking her up without too much effort.

"I've missed you too," Siri answered, burying her face in her shoulder for a moment. It was a comfort she had missed.  Someone there for her, to hug her and tell her that she was loved.

After a moment, Siri felt herself be taken from her mother's arms by her father.  She hugged him tight, and noted that like her mother, he also had tears in his eyes.  "My little girl.  You are growing up so fast," he smiled down at her while she looked up with a smile as well.  He kissed her forehead and gave her another hug and was then set down right next to Teka.

The sisters looked at each other for a moment as if unsure of what to say or how to react.

"Go on, Teka," Sabah urged gently and Siri noticed then that Teka was holding something behind her back.  Hesitantly, Teka pulled her hands from in front of her, holding a handmade card. 

"Mom wrote the words, but I made the pictures," the little girl announced, proudly, yet her voice was quiet, clearly shy around her sister.

Siri took it and looked at the front.  It read simply  "Welcome Home, Siri", with designs around it.

Opening it, Siri saw a picture of four people outside a house.  "That is us?" Siri asked.  Each of the figures, which were more or less like stick people, had smiles on their faces.

Teka nodded, wondering if this had been a good idea.

Truly touched, Siri hugged her sister back, who was half a head shorter.  "I'll keep it forever," she promised the younger girl.

With the passage of the first awkward moment, Teka seemed to transform as she hugged her sister back.  "I am glad you are back, Sisi," she grinned and Siri had to smile slightly, seeing her sister already had a nickname for her.  "Mom and Daddy talk about you.  I am happy to have a sister."

Siri looked back up at her parents who were watching the two girls, before looking back at Teka who finally released her from the hug.

"Oh, I have to show you the house, or you might get lost," Teka told her.

"Remember, she has lived here before," Temol reminded his youngest, patting her affectionately on the head.

Teka wouldn't be swayed though.  "Well, she hasn't seen my room yet," she answered and pulled Siri into the house before anyone else could speak up.

            The next four days passed quickly.  Her mother, who was now a part of the police force, had taken time off of work to spend all the time possible with her daughter.  Her father was a businessman who also had scheduled time off.

            The family always had fun activities planned.  They had taken Siri and Teka to Corellia's zoo, to a festival where they rode the rides and played games, and had taken a picnic in a park.  Siri loved every moment, and never wanted it to end.  Did she really want to return to the Jedi?  She knew her parents weren't supposed to take her to places like this. Instead, they were supposed to be having her experience a typical life, and explaining why they wanted her to go back to the Temple.  It was having the opposite effect on her, and she wasn't sure if she should be a Jedi.  She had enjoyed the zoo and the animals there.  She could always work with animals.

            On the final day, Siri was awoken by Teka.

            "Sisi!  Sisi, Sisi, Sisi!" she kept repeating as she dashed into the room.  She tugged Siri's arm, but no luck.  Siri's eyes were still closed, though she was fighting to keep from laughing, pretending to be asleep still.

            "Sisi…." Teka tried again then frowned.  She paused then climbed up on the bed, starting to jump up and down. "Wake up! Wake up, wake up wake up."

            Siri couldn't hold her laughter in any longer. It escaped as she opened her eyes, glancing up at her sister.  Teka froze mid jump.  "You were faking!" she announced with a hint of surprise.

            "Yep," the older girl smiled, and then she gave a small shout as her sister jumped over top of her tickling her. 

            Laughing, Siri batted her hands away, trying to tickle her as well.  They were laughing so hard, that they didn't hear their father open the door.  It wasn't until he spoke that they didn't even know he was there. 

            "Who is winning?" he smiled. 

            "Daddy!" Teka jumped off the bed and to his father, who picked her up, kissed her forehead and then set her down again.

            "Good morning," he smiled at her, and then glanced at Siri. "You plan on sleeping in?  Guess where we are going today."

            Siri thought about it for a moment before answering.  "I don't know. Where?"

            "The beach!" Teka exclaimed excitedly.

            "Really?" Siri asked.  She had just begun to learn how to swim, and was exited to go to the ocean.  She had never been to it.  Or if so, she couldn't remember.

            "Yes," her father nodded, seeing how excited they both were.  "Your mother has breakfast almost ready, so you might want to hurry," he winked and left.

            "Hurry, Sisi, I'm hungry!" Teka added, following her father.  She pulled the door shut behind her, leaving Siri, who was still on the bed, to get ready.

            It didn't take long for the Youngling to get dressed, wearing a comfortable pink tunic and flowered skirt her mother had gotten for her.  She then pulled on the opened toed shoes that slipped on easily.

            Looking in the mirror, she gave a nod, liking what she saw.   Seeing a comb that had been set out for her, Siri ran it through her hair a few times before hurrying out of the room.

            She trotted into the kitchen with a smile, seeing her mother just getting the plates ready, while her father was reading the comics to Teka, who was sitting on his lap.

            "Good morning," Sabah greeted her daughter with a smile, and Siri returned it.  This was what life was about. Smiling and being together.  That was how it should have been.  She frowned to herself thinking of how the Temple seemed empty of these feelings.

            "You look nice in that."  Her mother's voice brought her back to the present.  With a smile, she spun, allowing her mother to see it. "Well, go sit down. It is time to eat." 

            Siri was quick to oblige, as her mother set down plates for the two girls, then her own and Temol's.

            The family ate in relative silence, though it was comfortable.  However, the silence didn't last long after Teka had quickly eaten.  She couldn't stop asking about the ocean, asking what it was like.  Would they see the fish there?  Were they big?  Could they teach her to swim?

               Siri had to smile at her sister.  It was sweet to see her.  Refreshing from everyone else she knew at the Temple.  She also found herself wonder about swimming. She hadn't learned either, but had wanted to for quite sometime.

               "So, Siri…" her father was stopped by a comm. beeping.  He looked at the number then frowned, looking over at his wife.  Sabah nodded, biting her lip while Siri's father excused himself, then went into the other room to talk.

               "Is something wrong?" Siri asked, once Teka had taken a break in her questions to finish her breakfast.

               "No no.  Everything is fine. Just eat up." While her voice sounded friendly and easy going, Siri could sense something was wrong.  She didn't press the issue though, and went back to having her breakfast.

               When her father entered, clearly shaken about something.  Seeing this, her mother got up and went to him, and they started to talk quietly.  They both glanced at their daughters, and Siri could feel the nervous feeling again.  Not liking the change, she got up and went to her parents.

               "Is everything ok?" She asked them.

               Siri's mother looked down at her, giving a small nod with a forced smile.  "Siri, can take your sister upstairs?" 

               "Mom..." she started to protest.  What if she could help?  She might only be five but she was still a Jedi.  Besides, they were her family. 

               "Siri, listen to your mother," her father told her.  Realizing he might have sounded harsh, he offered a tight smile, and then gave a small gentle tug on a strand of hair. 

               Siri nodded sadly, seeing that they wouldn't tell her what was going on.  "Come on, Teka," she took her sister's hand, helping her off her chair.

               Even as the two started up the stairs, Siri kept looking over her shoulder, as if by doing that, she would be able to find out what was going on.  Her parents hadn't seemed like this at all since her arrival.  Was it something about the Jedi?  If so though, wouldn't her parents have told her?

               "Sisi, what is going on?" Teka asked, picking up that something was wrong. Why else would their parents send them upstairs?

               "I don't know," she admitted, and then quickly added,  "I am sure it is fine. You know adults. They like to talk about boring adult stuff," she tried to assure her sister, but not believing her own words.

               Teka nodded at this. If her sister said things were okay, then they would be.  She got halfway up the stairs, and then paused to yawn. 

               "I want to take a nap," she announced, starting to her room.

               Siri followed, glad Teka was still tired.  It would allow her a moment to go back downstairs to find out what was happening.

               "A nap sounds good." Siri remarked as she opened the door to Teka's room.  She helped her younger sister into bed, and then pulled the blanket over her, tucking her in.  Teka gave a small laugh at this, hugging Siri.  

               "I love you, Sisi," Teka smiled, and then yawned, snuggling under the blankets.

               "I love you too, Teka," Siri smiled, placing one of Teka's stuffed animals next to her, before kissing her cheek.

               Siri waited a few minutes until she was sure Teka was asleep.  She could hear her slowed regulated breathing, and see the younger girl's chest rise and fall.  There was a small smile on her face, hair fanned out on the pillow. She looked so young and innocent, that Siri couldn't help but smile slightly.  Shaking her head, she knew it was now or never. She got to her feet, slowly and silent, as to not wake Teka, and slipped out of the room.

               After getting down the staircase, she paused.  She didn't hear anyone inside, but heard voices coming from outside.

               Siri snuck to the front hall's open window, pausing to listen. "I demand you leave," Siri's father was ordering, voice calm and forceful.

               "We warned you..." an unfamiliar voice spoke up, cold and harsh.  

               Siri frowned, and slowly lifted her head, looking at the scene. What she saw made her gasp in surprise. Her parents were standing confronting five other men, three in a speeder and two standing.  The other men had large blaster rifles, and looked like they would be willing to test them.  The pilot wore a dark hat that seemed to make him look even taller than he was. The man in the passenger seat of the speeder seemed to be the leader. He had a cut over his left eye, wearing typical worn clothing, like his other companions. It was the scar that caught Siri's attention and she frowned. She had a feeling it was an important marking that she should remember. These men looked tough, especially compared to her parents who were standing side by side with no weapons.

               One of the men standing raised a blaster and Siri gasped. They couldn't shoot her parents! Her father stepped in front of her mother protectively, speaking in low tones and Siri caught only a few words "two more weeks...have children...do not...leave now," he ended with an order, though there was a bit of a shake in his tone, as if scared.

               The man came closer with the blaster, and Siri felt herself start to shake.  "Dad..." she whispered. She found herself unable to pull away from the scene, even if she had wanted to. The blonde hair girl then saw a slight movement. Her mother had upholstered her officer regulation blaster, and was sliding it into her husband's hand, which was behind his back.

               Seeing the movement, one of the men gave a warning shout and all of a sudden, in a flash of red and muffled bang, Temol fell with only a small shout of surprise.  Siri started to hyperventilate at this, in shock.  They had shot her father!  Without a second thought, she went rushing out the front door.  "Dad!" she shouted, rushing out, running to get to her father, who was motionless.

               "Siri, No!" her mother shouted in surprise and moved to intercept her oldest daughter.  Changing directions, Siri ran to her mother, tears already sliding down her cheeks.

               Jumping into her mother's arms, she buried her face in her mother's shoulder.  Sabah's body was tense as she used Siri's momentum to turn around, holding Siri close, protectively.  "Be strong, Siri," she whispered, her back now to the men, eyes closed tightly, knowing what was going to happen.

               All of this had happened just mere seconds, from when her father was shot, until that moment, being held tightly by her mother.  Before her mother had completely stopped herself from the turn, her skirt was still shifting from the sharp turn, another shot rang out, and Siri opened her eyes.  The leader stood, his blaster still in position.  He smirked and Siri felt her mother stumble, dropping to her knees.

               Her hold on Siri slackened, and Siri pulled back as her mother then fell forward, face against the ground.  "No! Mom!!" Siri screamed and flung her arms around her mother, seeing the singed cloth where the blaster bolt had hit her.  The smell of death was overwhelming as Siri felt her mother's life force leave her.  "No!" Siri shouted again, feeling pain run through her entire being.  Physically, she was fine.  Emotionally, she felt as if a krayt dragon was tearing her apart from the inside.

               Siri looked up at the men, who were starting to get closer to her.  "What about her?" one man asked, pointing a rifle at her. 

               Feeling a stab of fear, something she had never really felt before, made her freeze for just a moment.  She turned to run, but was felt herself grabbed by one of the men.  Siri managed to muffle a scream as she was pulled back, tripping over the hem of her skirt, which now seemed more a hindrance than anything else.

               "Are you scared little girl?" the man asked, his breath hot on her face and a whimper escaped her.  "You are…" he smirked.  "We could get a good price for you…" he was looking her over in a way that made a shiver run through Siri.  "I am sure a slaver would really like you.  Kids grow fast, and you could be a strong one.  Though you could pretty enough to do other things besides hard labor."

               Siri had been so focused on this man to realize the others had circled the house, holding flaming torches.  Their leader had stormed through the house, taking what he wanted.

               "What are you doing with her?" he barked to his man, who was still gripping Siri's arm.  She tried to pull away, but his hand held on in a vice like grip.

               "We could get a good price from someone on Kessel," the man answered.  Siri wasn't certain what Kessel was, but if this man had anything to do with it, it couldn't be a good place.

               The leader came a bit closer then gave a nod to the pilot, who seemed to be the leader's right hand man.  The pilot smirked, and then threw his torch onto the roof of the house.  The other two followed suit and for a moment all Siri could do was watch in shock.

               The flames quickly caught and started to spread along the roof.  They seemed to lap at each other, reaching up to the sky.  The heat was intense; Siri heard the attic window shatter, which is when she realized something.

               Teka.  Teka was still inside. If the leader had found her, no doubt Siri would have known.

               Siri struggled with a renewed fury, kicking and hitting.  The man holding her growled, trying to pull her closer so she had less room to thrash around.  All Siri could think of was her sister.  Her innocent smile and sparkling eyes could brighten Siri's mood any day. She was the closest thing to a friend that Siri had ever had. The two of them had a connection she couldn't explain.

               Siri continued to fight, tears falling.  That was when she had another idea.  She took a large lungful of air and screamed as loud as she could.  Quickly, the man slapped his large rough hand over her mouth.

               Without even thinking, Siri bit down on his hand, just frantic to be released.  The man howled in pain and pulled both hands back.  He quickly realized his mistake, then lunged forward to grab Siri again, but was too late.

               The young girl was running as fast as she could, skirt in one hand so she could run without tripping over the hem.  She heard the man curse at her, but didn't turn around. She didn't even slow down.

               While Siri knew she didn't want to be running toward the flames, she had to get to Teka.  That was all that mattered.  Getting Teka out.  She couldn't save her parents, but her little sister was now her responsibility. Siri could get her out, and they would both escape.  Maybe the Jedi would bring her to the Temple, or at least let her stay for sometime. 

               With these thoughts and hopes, Siri dashed through the front door and into the burning building.

               Immediately her eyes filled with tears and her throat burned from the thick blanket of smoke that seemed to cover everything.  Siri paused in surprise, coughing hard, already feeling the lack of clean air affecting her.

               She didn't give up though. Instead, she covered her nose and mouth with her tunic's arm sleeve, which she still wore.

               The only things she could see was the smoke, and heard more glass exploding upstairs.  She only had minutes to escape before the entire house was engulfed in flames.  She stumbled onward, other hand using to feel the wall to the stairs.

               Upon reaching the staircase, the heat grew more intense and the smoke filled the air as she started upward.  On the third stair, she dropped to her hands and knees, crawling up the stairs.

               Just when Siri found herself wandering if this trip was never ending, she got to the top.  Going from memory, still crawling, she turned right, lungs aching, tears falling without any sound aside from her labored breathing.

               Getting to the halfway opened door, Siri pushed it open the rest of the way. 

               "Teka!" she tried to call, but her voice was hoarse. The intake of the air caused her to cough harder as she pressed onward.  At that moment, she wanted to just give in. Her body felt weighed down by the flames that were closing in.  She tripped on her hem again and had to use every reserve of energy to press on.  Even though she couldn't see it, Siri knew that Teka's bed was just feet away.

               Pulling herself up on the blanket, she expected to find herself looking at her sister.  Instead, there was just an empty bed.

               Panic grasped Siri. Where could she be?  She glanced around, unable to see more than a foot on any side of her.

               The answer came to her as she dropped to her hands and knees again.  A shape under the bed was hidden in the dark and in the smoke, but Siri had seen it.

               She reached under the bed and pulled out the stuffed animal that she had placed with Teka before she had went downstairs.  Teka must still be hiding under the bed.

               With this thought, Siri reached in with one hand and felt Teka's arm.  Her sister didn't respond to this and Siri felt fear rush through her again.  Pulling hard, she slid Teka out from under the bed. Again, there was no response. 

               Looking down, Siri could only hope that the smoke was what made her look this bad. She had a light film of smoke residue covering her, which gave her skin a gray coloring. Her eyes were closed, as if sleeping, though there was a slight frown in place of the smile that had been there.

               Siri's attention was called back to the moment as another window exploded from the heat.  They had to get out of the house.

               Pulling her sister with her, Siri continued to crawl on her knees and other hand.  She was starting to get disoriented and knew if she stayed much longer, she and Teka would both die.

               Reminding herself that she had to save her sister, Siri got to the top of the stairs.  She pulled Teka close to her, half pulling, and half carrying the younger girl down the stairs.  One hand was on the now heated banister while the other was wrapped around Teka's waist. 

               Reaching the ground floor, Siri knew they had to make it.  They were so close.  She still was carrying Teka, but with both hands doing this, she found herself tripping on the hem of her skirt.  Each time, she landed hard on her knees. 

               She hated skirts at that moment.  This was taking too long.  She could move much faster with pants on instead.

               Even with stumbling, Siri finally reached the door.  With one last burst of energy, they emerge from the house, falling to the ground. 

               Siri coughed for over a full minute until her aching, smoky lungs were able to get some clean, fresh air.

               Finally, wiping the tears that were still falling, Siri looked down at her sister.

               She was still, far too still.  She looked even worse in the sunlight.  Her skin was gray as were her lips. 

               Frantic, Siri leaned closer, but couldn't hear Teka breathing.  Looking closer, placing one hand on her chest, Siri was hit by the truth as if by a speeder.  Teka was dead.  She had been too late.

               Unable to control herself, Siri grabbed Teka's shoulders and shook them slightly.  "Teka no!  Come back, please come back! Don't leave me."

               She flung her arms around her little sister at this, sobbing, face buried in her shoulder.  She heard the crackling of flames and a few explosions sounding from the interior of the house.

               She wasn't sure how long she was there, coughing and crying still coughing, feeling detached from everything until she heard a soft click. She turned and there was a blaster pointed at her.  Looking up the barrel of the blaster, she found herself facing the scarred eye of the gang's leader. "Do you want to join them?" the man taunted.

               Siri couldn't move, but just look up at the man blankly. She was made but could barely breath, let alone thing.  After all this, he was going to shoot her.

               "Boss, we can't kill her," the pilot spoke up.

               Blaster still pointed at Siri, the other man turned to him.  "Why?" he snapped.

               "She came with that Jedi.  That means she is training to be a Jedi."

               "So?  The less Jedi, the better," the leader's finger moved to the trigger.

               "If we kill her, they will come after us.  Her old man's deals with us are gone in that mess," he motioned to the flames. 

               The leader paused, thinking this over.  His partner was right.  Flinging Siri's bag at her, which he had grabbed, hoping to find something in it during his ransack of the house, hit her hard. 

               Wincing, rubbing her side where she was hit, Siri picked it up.

               "Your father was a foolish man to make deals he couldn't follow through with," the leader smirked.  "Run, little girl….run."  He shot right at her feet, just an inch to the side. "Run and don't look back!" he shouted.

               This pushed Siri into action and she followed his advice, terrified, clutching her bag. She didn't look back at Teka, her parents or the burning building. She continued to run as more shots rang out, one over her shoulder, the others at her feet.

               Reaching the woods that ended the property of the Tachi's land, Siri kept running, tripping on her dress with tore on the undergrowth.  Branches seemed to reach for her, pulling her hair.  Hidden roots caused her to trip, getting dirt, mud and leaves all over her skirt and tunic.  She had lost one shoe somewhere along the way, but hadn't stopped moving.

               It wasn't until she collapsed, unable to go further that Siri realized she was alone. No one was following her.  She was alone.  Even as the thought was comforting, it was scary.

               She curled up on the damp forest floor and looked in her bag.  One of her mother's necklaces was on top of it all.  She was certain that the leader of the gang had put it there and forgotten about it. It was a simple silver chain with a small pendant. 

               Tears came to Siri's eyes as she held onto it.  It was the only thing of her family that she had left.  That and memories.  No, there was something else, she reminded herself.  Pawing through her bag, she saw the card that Teka had made for her.  It was only lightly creased, but still in good condition.

               Opening it, she looked at the figures, one for each of her family.  Now, she was the only one.  Siri started to cry again, alone and lost in the forest.  The cries came raw and harsh from her already hurt lungs.  The tears fell, and she wasn't sure if they would ever stop.

               Siri awoke with a start, panting hard, body twisted in her blankets.  Her heart was racing so fast she could hear it.

               In the dark room, Siri slowly forced herself to calm down.  'Deep breath in, deep breath out' she told herself.  As she did this, forcing her heart to go back to its normal rhythm, she looked around her room.

               It was just like many of the other rooms at the Temple. Even though it was dark, Siri knew from memory what it looked like. The walls were bare of any decoration, with only a desk, chair, bed and dresser in the bedroom.  There was a 'fresher connected to the left, and to the right, a small closet.  Everything was exactly as it should be. She was at the Temple, where she was supposed to be.

               Flopping back on the bed, she closed her eyes for a moment.  "I shouldn't be having these nightmares anymore," she chided herself.  Her voice sounded strange to her, weighed with sleep and emotions.

               Forcing back the phantom physical pain and the emotional pain that accompanied it, she ran a hand over her face.  After this flashback, which haunted her at night, her lungs hurt, and her body felt like it was being weighed down by lead.  Her skin always felt heated, as if still being licked by the tendrils of the flames.

               Just as the sun rose above the horizon the morning after the death of her parents and sister, Siri's Jedi guardian found her.  She had been curled up on the ground, bag being used as a pillow, clothes torn and dirty.  She had been cold and shaking from the exposure to the chilly night.

               She had been carried back to the transport to get her out off planet. She had wanted to ask about the funerals for her family, but her throat was swollen after breathing so much smoke.  Her skin also was burnt from the exposure to the extreme heat from the fires.

               She had been treated by the Jedi en route to the Temple, with soothing aloe and bacta being spread over her skin to help heal the burns, that were much like sunburns.  She was also given some medicine to help her sleep until they got back to the Temple. She was kept warm until they got there, and then taken immediately to the healer's ward.

               There, she was given medicine and a type of tea to help her throat.  A healer also helped accelerate the healing of her lungs from all the smoke that was still in her system.

               She only had to stay in the healer's ward for two days.  On the third, she was deemed fit enough to continue training.  While still a bit shaky, she had thrown herself into her studies and exercises with everything she had. 

               Even after she had physically healed, the Council had worried she had changed.  That she could possibly turn to the Dark Side after what she had experienced.  However, she had proven herself, saying she was more determined to not allow others to suffer.

               The nightmares had plagued her sleep for nights afterward, but she hadn't told anyone.  She had cried into her pillow, grateful that Younglings had their own separate rooms.   As time went on and her training intensified, the nightmares had faded, and were almost nonexistent.

               The nights they did revisit her, it took time to drift back to sleep, usually going over things she had learned over her time as a Jedi. Thinking of lightsaber stances, or other planets she wanted to visit, thinking over the facts she had learned about them.

               Tonight was different though.  She had to close the book on her past.  She would forever carry the memories, but she could not allow these to awaken her. More than enough time had passed.

               She got out of bed, turning on her lights so they were at a dim setting.  She blinked a few times, letting her eyes get accustomed to the light, even though it was faint.

               Siri went back to her bed and got down her knees were a small box, only the size of a shoebox, was hidden.  It was pressed against the wall, hidden from sight by the leg of the bed.

               Sitting on the floor, Siri lifted the lid of the wooden box.  Even though the light was on, she didn't need it to see what was in it.  There were two items.  The first was a small silver necklace. She fingered it, as she had done often, but had never worn it. It would have felt too strange.

               Second, there was a card.  Teka's card.  While Siri would look at the cover, she very rarely would open it to look at it.  This night though, she gently picked it up, and opened it, seeing the people on the inside.  Each time she saw the card, it brought back memories, but the items were loosing their powerful hold on her, for which she was thankful.

               Placing the items back in the box, she looked at it.  She could destroy it. She probably should, since Jedi were not supposed to have personal belongings like that. However, even as she thought about it, she knew she wouldn't be able to.  The link to her family had been shattered, yet she didn't want it to be lost forever.

               Shaking her head, she pushed the box under the bed further.  Further into the shadows and darkness, where the light never would reach.

               With her emotions now under control, she got back to her feet, wiping her hands off of her sleep pants.  She had never worn a skirt after that day, and never wanted to again. 

               Turning off the lights, Siri went back to bed, curling up under the blankets. 

               'I will never let myself get close like that again,' she promised herself as she yawned.  It wasn't worth getting hurt.  'Why bother getting close to someone if they just leave or die?' she asked herself.  There was no answer to this though.  She had been working on hardening herself, and never had a true friendship.  Just uneasy alliances with her colleagues.

               A new determination overtook Siri. She would be the best Jedi she could.  She would never allow someone to go through what she did.  To feel that pain and fear. 

               This determination was faded slightly as a yawn overtook her.  Everything would have to wait until tomorrow.  Siri needed her sleep.

               'After all,' Siri Tachi concluded, as sleep overtook her.  'Even seven year olds need sleep.'