Chapter.8...lucas
One of my biggest pet peeves in the world was cell phones. Now more than ever after my little cell phone accident senior year. I hated people who wouldn't answer their phones. I hated people who had phones and didn't carry them. And I also hated people who always talked in them in public places. No one cared about their problems, especially when you can only hear one end of the conversation. My cell phone tribulations continued into the day.
That afternoon I must have called around ten times and still no answer. Finally, the eleventh time I called she answered. No, wait, no answer, just voicemail. She really needs to change that "Hello? It's Brooke." It gets me every time, especially that time. I anxiously awaited her answer after I pressed the redial button one last time. Of course, no success yet again.
Let me think. What would a jealous ex-boyfriend/father do if he wanted to talk to his ex-girlfriend/mother? It hit me like a ton of bricks. After reaching for my keys off of my bed side table, I rolled off of my bed and left my room. My mom stood in the kitchen, watching my every move.
"Lucas, where are you going?" She called to me as she stirred a bowl full of cookie dough.
"Out." I walked into the kitchen and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I will be back later."
I watched her nod her head as I walked out the door. Nerves rushed throughout my whole body before I had even reached my truck. After I started my car I began to have second thoughts. What was I doing? I thought to myself. Brooke doesn't want to be with me and I should respect that. Then, I finally came to my senses. I loved Brooke and I would always love Brooke.
She was my first true love and as far as I knew, I was her first also. Nothing could come between the fact that we had a child together. There would always be a part of me combined with a part of her out there in the world and I had to take matters into my own hands. I knew Brooke would make no effort for Lilia and me to come in contact so I had to.
Once I pulled out of my driveway I came to the conclusion that I wasn't going to Brooke's to see her, I was going to see my daughter. Pulling into her estate and onto her driveway, I noticed an unfamiliar car. It was a black 2004 Ford Explorer with a bumper stick on the back that read, "I gave up drugs, sex and booze...it was the worst 20 minutes of my life."
You have got to be kidding me, I thought to myself. She left me for some guy who is addicted to drugs, sex, and alcohol. Just what she needs.
I knocked on the door three times before someone answered. It was a guy, maybe my age or a little older. "Hey." He said. I knew the guy, but I just couldn't remember his name. He put his hand out, "Daniel Howard."
"Lucas Scott." I said shaking his hand.
"Right, right from Tree Hill High. I remember you."
I followed him inside the house and looked around. Nothing had changed, although I hadn't expected it to. "Yeah, you went to Pinkerton, right?" I watched him nod his head as he walked into the living room and casually took a seat, in my place, on the couch.
Before I sat down, I saw her. Both of them. They were in the kitchen. Lilia's head rested on her shoulder. Brooke's arm was under Lilia's rear end. Dressed in gray sweatpants and a black tank top, she looked phenomenal. Lilia wore only a diaper and a light pink ribbon atop her head.
Brooke slowly turned around. At first I believe she saw me but then I spoke up. "Brooke." She looked in my direction and handed the baby off to Daniel. I cringed, longing to be the one to hold my daughter.
"Come in here with me." She said, leading me into the dining room. Brooke picked a photo album off of the table and handed it to me. "Here. I want you to have this." She crossed her arms across her chest and shifted her weight from one foot to the other.
I opened the album and began flipping through the pages. It was a scrapbook Brooke had made. It started out with the two of us in middle school. Brooke had braces and I wore a backwards basketball cap. In the picture Brooke was reaching over my head and pulling the hat off. The final picture was of Brooke and me at graduation. Lilia was in-between us.
"Brooke," I said, trying to hand the album back to her. "I can't take this."
"I want you to have it." She let out a long sigh. "Lucas, I am tired."
"Do you need to nap? Cause I can take..."
She shook her head. "No, I mean. I am tired of this." She pointed her finger and moved it in a circular motion. "I don't want to be like this anymore. She needs a father." We looked over at Lilia, who was laying across Daniel's chest.
"Seems like she already has one." I said pulling out a chair from the table and sitting down.
"Come on Lucas, I am trying to reconcile here not start a..."
"I am not trying to start a fight either." My voice began to rise. "I fell like a dead beat and it is your entire fault." I pushed the album onto the floor. "If you would have just TOLD me that you were pregnant instead of me having to find out for myself when I saw you after Christmas break."
She picked the album off the floor and sat it back onto the table. "I know, Lucas, I made a mistake." I watched her calm face quickly turn annoyed. "But you made a bigger mistake when you slept with my best friend."
"A bigger mistake? Ha!" I stood up out of the chair and pushed it out of the way. "How could that be a bigger mistake? At least my mistake didn't affect my whole life."
"That is the most idiotic thing I have ever heard." She threw her arms into the air and then rested them on her hips. "Don't you get it Lucas; it did change your life. If you hadn't screw up and around we would still be together."
"Do you really believe that?" I asked her, wrathfully. "If we couldn't stay together before, what makes you think we could have stayed together after Lilia was born? Nothing. You don't have any sort of facts to prove that we would still have been together."
"I didn't need facts Lucas! All I knew was that I loved you. I was a stupid, naïve girl who thought that all you needed was love. God damnit!" She screamed throwing a vase of roses to the wall. It hit and shattered into thousands of little glass pieces.
She pointed to the front door. "Get out of my house." When I didn't leave, she yelled again, "I said get out!" Once I reached the door I looked at my daughter, asleep on another man. Then I looked back at Brooke, who was knelt down in front of the crushed glass. She was sobbing. She looked up and at me, "Please." She could hardly speak from all the tears. "Just leave."
One of my biggest pet peeves in the world was cell phones. Now more than ever after my little cell phone accident senior year. I hated people who wouldn't answer their phones. I hated people who had phones and didn't carry them. And I also hated people who always talked in them in public places. No one cared about their problems, especially when you can only hear one end of the conversation. My cell phone tribulations continued into the day.
That afternoon I must have called around ten times and still no answer. Finally, the eleventh time I called she answered. No, wait, no answer, just voicemail. She really needs to change that "Hello? It's Brooke." It gets me every time, especially that time. I anxiously awaited her answer after I pressed the redial button one last time. Of course, no success yet again.
Let me think. What would a jealous ex-boyfriend/father do if he wanted to talk to his ex-girlfriend/mother? It hit me like a ton of bricks. After reaching for my keys off of my bed side table, I rolled off of my bed and left my room. My mom stood in the kitchen, watching my every move.
"Lucas, where are you going?" She called to me as she stirred a bowl full of cookie dough.
"Out." I walked into the kitchen and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I will be back later."
I watched her nod her head as I walked out the door. Nerves rushed throughout my whole body before I had even reached my truck. After I started my car I began to have second thoughts. What was I doing? I thought to myself. Brooke doesn't want to be with me and I should respect that. Then, I finally came to my senses. I loved Brooke and I would always love Brooke.
She was my first true love and as far as I knew, I was her first also. Nothing could come between the fact that we had a child together. There would always be a part of me combined with a part of her out there in the world and I had to take matters into my own hands. I knew Brooke would make no effort for Lilia and me to come in contact so I had to.
Once I pulled out of my driveway I came to the conclusion that I wasn't going to Brooke's to see her, I was going to see my daughter. Pulling into her estate and onto her driveway, I noticed an unfamiliar car. It was a black 2004 Ford Explorer with a bumper stick on the back that read, "I gave up drugs, sex and booze...it was the worst 20 minutes of my life."
You have got to be kidding me, I thought to myself. She left me for some guy who is addicted to drugs, sex, and alcohol. Just what she needs.
I knocked on the door three times before someone answered. It was a guy, maybe my age or a little older. "Hey." He said. I knew the guy, but I just couldn't remember his name. He put his hand out, "Daniel Howard."
"Lucas Scott." I said shaking his hand.
"Right, right from Tree Hill High. I remember you."
I followed him inside the house and looked around. Nothing had changed, although I hadn't expected it to. "Yeah, you went to Pinkerton, right?" I watched him nod his head as he walked into the living room and casually took a seat, in my place, on the couch.
Before I sat down, I saw her. Both of them. They were in the kitchen. Lilia's head rested on her shoulder. Brooke's arm was under Lilia's rear end. Dressed in gray sweatpants and a black tank top, she looked phenomenal. Lilia wore only a diaper and a light pink ribbon atop her head.
Brooke slowly turned around. At first I believe she saw me but then I spoke up. "Brooke." She looked in my direction and handed the baby off to Daniel. I cringed, longing to be the one to hold my daughter.
"Come in here with me." She said, leading me into the dining room. Brooke picked a photo album off of the table and handed it to me. "Here. I want you to have this." She crossed her arms across her chest and shifted her weight from one foot to the other.
I opened the album and began flipping through the pages. It was a scrapbook Brooke had made. It started out with the two of us in middle school. Brooke had braces and I wore a backwards basketball cap. In the picture Brooke was reaching over my head and pulling the hat off. The final picture was of Brooke and me at graduation. Lilia was in-between us.
"Brooke," I said, trying to hand the album back to her. "I can't take this."
"I want you to have it." She let out a long sigh. "Lucas, I am tired."
"Do you need to nap? Cause I can take..."
She shook her head. "No, I mean. I am tired of this." She pointed her finger and moved it in a circular motion. "I don't want to be like this anymore. She needs a father." We looked over at Lilia, who was laying across Daniel's chest.
"Seems like she already has one." I said pulling out a chair from the table and sitting down.
"Come on Lucas, I am trying to reconcile here not start a..."
"I am not trying to start a fight either." My voice began to rise. "I fell like a dead beat and it is your entire fault." I pushed the album onto the floor. "If you would have just TOLD me that you were pregnant instead of me having to find out for myself when I saw you after Christmas break."
She picked the album off the floor and sat it back onto the table. "I know, Lucas, I made a mistake." I watched her calm face quickly turn annoyed. "But you made a bigger mistake when you slept with my best friend."
"A bigger mistake? Ha!" I stood up out of the chair and pushed it out of the way. "How could that be a bigger mistake? At least my mistake didn't affect my whole life."
"That is the most idiotic thing I have ever heard." She threw her arms into the air and then rested them on her hips. "Don't you get it Lucas; it did change your life. If you hadn't screw up and around we would still be together."
"Do you really believe that?" I asked her, wrathfully. "If we couldn't stay together before, what makes you think we could have stayed together after Lilia was born? Nothing. You don't have any sort of facts to prove that we would still have been together."
"I didn't need facts Lucas! All I knew was that I loved you. I was a stupid, naïve girl who thought that all you needed was love. God damnit!" She screamed throwing a vase of roses to the wall. It hit and shattered into thousands of little glass pieces.
She pointed to the front door. "Get out of my house." When I didn't leave, she yelled again, "I said get out!" Once I reached the door I looked at my daughter, asleep on another man. Then I looked back at Brooke, who was knelt down in front of the crushed glass. She was sobbing. She looked up and at me, "Please." She could hardly speak from all the tears. "Just leave."