Chapter.9...brooke

What was happening? What was I doing to myself? Why was I doing this? Sometimes I wondered if maybe there was something wrong with me. If maybe I was scared of commitment. Not only was a ruining my life, but now I had another person in my life I had to worry about. No longer could I be the selfish me, I had to be a new me. I had to be the selfless me.

Watching Lucas' leave my house, possibly for good, made me come to the understanding that I had really screwed up. He was the only man in my life and he was the only person who had ever made me feel like I was special. He was the only person who had ever told me that he loved me. I knew that he was the only one in the world who would put up with me and almost enjoy it.

I watched Lilia's chest go up and down in a somewhat soothing rhythm. Nothing in my life had been calming since I had given birth to Lilia. Nothing was simple anymore. There was only one person who could make everything a little more simple.

Running into the kitchen and grabbing my car keys off of the table, I called out to anyone who was listening, "I have to go." I ran out of the front door and jumped into my car, not worrying about Lilia because I knew Daniel would watch her.

The front door opened and Daniel stood in the door way with Lilia resting on his hip. "Where are you going?" He asked me through my open window. He was a good friend, part of me wish that we had become more but the other part of me, the part of me that loved Lucas knew that it was better this way.

"I just, I just have to go." I said, out of breath. I turning the car on and began to pull out of the driveway.

I heard Daniel's muffled voice as I left the driveway, "He loves you." I smiled at his comment.

Reaching for the radio, I noticed my hand was shaking. He can't be too far, I thought to myself. He just left my house. When I got to his house, I noticed his truck was not there. Karen stood in the front yard, "Where is Lucas? Do you know?"

She shrugged her sholders and said, "I thought he went to your house."

I let out a long sigh, "He was but, it's a long story and I just really need to find him."

"Sorry I can't help dear. Maybe he is..."

The beemer pulled away before she could continue. Driving faster than I had ever driven before in my life, I became more and more nervous. What if he went to Peyton's? What if he doesn't want to be with me anymore? I asked myself, hitting my steering wheel with my left hand. Why was I so stupid? Lucas was the perfect guy. Maybe that is why I did what I did. He was too perfect for someone like me. A girl like me didn't deserve someone like him.

Trying to stay focused on the road; I shuffled through my purse and finally found my cell phone. I dialed Haley's cell phone number. No answer. Next I called Nathan's house. "Hello?"

"Nathan?"

"Brooke?"

"Yeah, I don't have time to talk. Does anyone know where Lucas is?"

I heard him ask Haley. "I don't have a clue but Haley said maybe at the RiverCourt."

"Shit." I said, hitting the steering wheel once more. "I just passed it."

"Why do you need to know? I didn't think you all were really on speaking terms."

I pulled into someone's driveway to turn around. "Well we aren't... but we are. Well, he came to my house and we fought... I don't have time to talk about this right now Nathan. I will call you back later to let you know how everything went, okay?"

"Okay fine. Bye."

I closed my cell phone and threw it back into my purse. There he was. I should have known. He was shooting three, after three, after three accompanied by the occasional free throw. I opened my car door and slowly got out. My arms were crossed over my chest. He heard me close the door and looked over in my direction but quickly turned away.

"Didn't get enough yelling out the last time you saw me?" He asked shooting another three and then going up for a lay-up.

"Listen, Lucas, I know I am the last person you want to talk to especially after what happened back there." I bit my lip and questioned whether or not to continue, "But, I just..."

Lucas took the ball and sat down on a bench about six feet away from me. He sat the ball on the ground. "You're not the last person I want to talk to." He said, now looking up at me. "Close, but not the last person."

Yet again I refused eye contact and looked away from him. I wondered if I should sit down next to him or continue standing. I opted for standing. "I just came to say..." I ran my fingers through my hair and continued, "That I don't appreciate what you did back there."

He picked the ball off of the ground and began bouncing it again, "You have got to be kidding me, Brooke. Your outstanding pride is really making you sound like a jackass right now." He shook his head and under his breath said, "You are so arrogant."

Agreeing with him I said, "Let's just hope Lilia has your unselfishness. The last thing you need is another conceited woman in your life." I moved over and sat next to him, finally looking him in the eyes.

"What are you saying?" He asked, putting the ball down for a final time.

"God, this is so hard for me." I lowered my arms to my sides and said, "I want you to take me back."

"What makes you think that I should do that?"

"Come on Lucas don't make me do this."

"Do what?"

"Beg."

"I didn't even know the word beg was in your vocabulary."

"I didn't either, but there is no way in hell that you will ever get Brooke Davis to beg for anything."

"What if I said, if you beg then maybe I will take you back?"

"Maybe?" I shook my head and my index finger at him and said, "No maybe about it. Either yes or no."

"Okay, if you beg I will take you back."

I took a deep breath and put my pride aside, "Please, Lucas, take me back." I said, half-heartedly.

"Come on." He said, "You can do better than that."

Hitting him on the arm, I said, "Don't make me do it again."

He held up one finger and said, "One more time and I sware this is the last time."

"Please, Lucas, take me back." I said, this time really trying.

"Why should I take you back?" He asked, sincerely as he put his arm around my waist.

It felt so good that I could barely speak. I leaned in and kissed him on the lips. "Because, because I love you and so does Lilia."

He kissed me back and said, "Well, I guess that is reason enough."

I leaned over and rested my head on his shoulder. "Guess we better go get the baby from Daniel."

"You left our baby with Daniel?"

"Say that one more time." I said to him, as I looked him right in the blue eyes.

"What? The part about Daniel?" He asked with a confused look on his face.

I shook my head and said, "No, the part about our baby."

His face lit up and he said, "Wow, our baby."

Author Note: Good, bad, wonderful, terrible? Tell me what you think. For those of you who really enjoyed Being Bad and Comfortable, I have started on a third installment titled Nothing Gold Can Stay so please be on the lookout for that story. Thanks to everyone who have read my stories and reviewed them. If you all haven't done that, then I probably would have stopped writing.

PS Sorry about taking to long to get Lucas and Brooke together, it was fun to write but I'm sure hard to read. Thanks for sticking with it.