Perfect Imbalance
Disclaimer: I do not own any of Bram Stoker, Oscar Wilde, or "Angel" characters sadly enough. I only own Sair the character and any other original names mentioned and if anyone steals the names or characters…I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN!!!…so be nice and don't steal kay?
(Author's note: Here is a basic wrap-up of the story, how'll you figure out what happened and stuff, but I warn ye! (ye, what an odd word) There's not too much violence, more of the emotional stuff, but read anyway!! Enjoi!)
Ch.28
Spike awoke to pain. Immediately after becoming conscious again, he tried to sit up, bad move. White hot sparks of agony seared through his body even after he laid back down quickly. He grit his teeth together in pain, but wouldn't yell, he was too proud for that.
'Where am I?' he thought, 'What happened? Where's Sair?'
He opened his eyes, only to shut them in pain from the bright lights that shined overhead. Feeling the pang of an oncoming headache, Spike slowly opened his eyes, slowly getting used to the light. When his vision had cleared, he realized where he was. He was in Fred's lab, on the cot that he had been on once before, but now an ivy of blood was hooked into the vein at his inner elbow. The blond vampire saw a fresh blood pack hanging from the metal hook and stand.
"Hey, you're awake," a voice sounded from Spike's left.
The blond vampire turned his head to see Fred standing with tears in her eyes.
"Hey," he said.
"Hey," she answered, "You gave us quite a scare back there."
"Hmph, I guess I do that a lot," Spike replied, "What happened?"
"You don't remember?"
"Not much after I blacked out," the vampire replied, "I saw Dorian's sword aiming for me and then that was it."
A frown crossed the young scientists' face.
"What?" Spike asked, concerned.
Fred sighed as she pulled up a chair next to his cot and then slowly, painfully, she told him the whole story of what happened. Every detail following up to the end.
Spike's eyes clouded in grief, and pain.
He looked to Fred, "Where is she now?"
"In her room," the young scientist replied, "She's been up there ever since."
"Where's my coat?"
"Spike, you can't go up there, you're too weak-"
"Fred, where is my coat?" the blond vampire said more slowly and sternly, staring into the eyes of the scientist.
"Here," Fred acquiesced as she got up, went to a nearby drawer, and retrieved the blond vampire's infamous leather duster from it.
She walked back and handed to him in the perfect little pile it was folded into, "You're right, she needs you now."
Painfully, Spike took out the needle in his arm and got to a sitting position on the cot, swinging his legs over the side, he stood up fully and took his jacket gently from her.
"Thank you," the blond vampire told her as he unfolded the item and put it on. Oddly enough, it gave him some kind of comfort for what was to come.
He walked to the stairs, looking back only once before he quickly climbed the steps, his pain slowly fading away since he was moving now and getting used to it. He soon reached the main floor and went to the elevator. Facing the now closing doors, Spike felt for the first time in his life true fear, fear of what would happen now, and he hadn't the slightest inkling on how to quell it.
As the doors finally opened to the floor he needed, Spike slowly walked out, mentally preparing himself for what was to come, even though he had no idea on what it was at all. He made his way down the hall and finally came to a stop at the door that led to Sair's temporary room.
Making a mental sigh, (for he had a lacked the ability to make a real one) he knocked on the door twice lightly. When no response came, he thought the worse and opened it immediately with a swift turn of the knob and pushed the door open. What he saw, he would never forget.
Sair was sitting on the floor in a pretty open corner. Her elbows resting on her knees as she reclined back on the soft carpet. She held a small dagger in her right hand, and was repeatedly, slowly, slicing her left palm open, and watching it heal with a morbid yet indifferent fascination.
"Sair…" the blond vampire spoke as he slowly approached her, "What are you doing to yourself?"
The younger of the two chuckled nonchalantly, "Nothing….absolutely nothing…"
Spike soon crossed the distance between them and kneeled down next to her, discarding her knife and holding her hands in his.
"Everything's lost Spike," the young vampire spoke as she looked him in the eyes, pure melancholy filling them.
The blond vampire regrettably looked into his sister's eyes, the color in them was now silver, not the wonderful shade of brown he used to see in them before.
"I can't live, I can't die," Sair spoke, her voice cracking, "I-I can't even bleed…"
Spike couldn't do anything from the pure pain that ripped in his heart. He was, for once, not able to do anything, not even help a little bit. Helpless to do anything at all, and it ripped at him. Sair had started to cry, shedding tears of pain that would not quell it. The blond vampire pulled her close and embraced her, the only thing he could do and rocked the weeping girl back and forth in his arms.
"I'm sorry.." was all he could see, but he didn't receive any reply from her, she was still crying, "I'm so sorry…."
After a moment or two, Sair gently pushed out of Spike's embrace, looking at the blond vampire with tear filled eyes.
"What?" he asked.
"I…I just need to be alone now," the young vampire replied, "Please.."
After a few moments of inner struggle, Spike nodded and went to the door, but stopped as he opened it.
Without turning, he said, "I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to save you Sair….I'm sorry…"
And with that, he left the young vampire by herself in the room.
"You were always strong enough," Sair murmured, "But no one could've saved me."
She looked down to her left middle finger and saw the silver band that Dorian had put on her, she hadn't taken it off. She didn't know what it meant, why he gave it to her as his dying gift? No, as a reminder of what he was and what he had done to her. A painful memory never to leave her the same.
Spike stared blankly at the opposing wall of his office. Even though it was spacious, he couldn't have felt more secluded and lonely, like he were in a small box of sorts. He was so absorbed in his own misery that he barely even noticed Angel walking in and standing broadly in front of the huge windows, hands clasped behind his back.
Before he had a chance to say anything, Spike cut him off.
"I know what you're gonna say, and I say don't bother. I don't wanna hear your half-assed attempts at giving me your condolences."
"Well, I have to say something, or else it would weigh on me with guilt," Angel replied solemnly.
"Very well, the stage is yours, take your shot."
"I just wanted to say that I know what kind of pain you're going through. I've almost been through the same thing."
"Pardon me, Angel," Spike interrupted as he stood up angrily from his chair, "But I don't think your sister went through hell and back to kill the one person she hated, and rescue the one she loved, ending in failure and becoming something she despises."
"No," the older vampire acquiesced, "But I've felt like I've lost something before, like you."
"Oh really?"
"Yes," Angel said, "I lost a son."
"What?"
"As many things that go on in this world, it's not too surprising that I would be able to even have a son. But soon it came to hell. It wasn't meant for a vampire to have a child, so his own insanity ripped him away from me. He couldn't cope with the fact that the world was so cold, humans being so harsh to other humans and the like. He couldn't stand it. And now he's gone from me…forever."
As farfetched as the whole story sounded, it struck a chord within Spike. It wasn't surprising that a champion could have a child, but lose one as well? Maybe he had felt the same pain, maybe even more.
"What was his name?" Spike asked.
"Conner," Angel said with a smile of reminiscence, "I loved him with all my heart, and it tore at me to see him go, but it was for his own good. But the pain still stays Spike, it never fades. So in a sense, I do know what you're going through, and I couldn't be more sorry that someone else has to feel the pain I once did."
Spike lowered his head in despair.
"She can't stay here Spike."
"Why not?" he asked simply, fearing that he already knew the answer.
"You know why," Angel replied, "It's still too much for her to take. Sair needs time to recover, so to speak."
"Where could she go?" the blond vampire thought, "There's no place for her except by my side."
"Maybe that's a decision she'll need to come too," the older vampire turned to him, "I don't care where she goes, she can stay here for all I care, but I just want her to have peace, and I have a feeling you do too."
And with that, Angel left. Leaving Spike with a heavy thought to consider.
(Author's note: Dontcha just love these little intermission thingys' I keep putting in??? Ah, you know you do!! (Gets pelted by random items of food) Agh! ALRIGHT!!! ON WITH THE STORY!!! Wait! Forgot my catchphrase!!! NOW GO READ THE REST DAMMIT!!!)
Ch.29
Spike paced his office for what seemed an eternity in itself, trying to think, not one of his strong points. He couldn't decide which was the better choice. To keep Sair here, where a lot of bad things happen, or let her out somewhere else, where God knows what could happen. Finally, well after sunset, he came to his decision.
He was going to set off to her room, but she was suddenly at the door to his office. Surprised, but no willing to show it, Spike just settled to smile at her unannounced arrival.
"Hey," he said, "I was just about to go see you."
"Well, I suppose I saved you the trip," Sair replied a little bit indifferently as she stood almost stock still in the doorway.
"Sair, I need to tell you something," Spike finally admitted after a few moments of silence.
"What?" the young vampire said as she went over and sat on the couch that lied in her brother's office.
Sweeping his trench coat, Spike went to sit next to her a little bit uncomfortably as he readied himself to say what he wanted to say.
"I think.." he started slowly, "That it would be best if you leave here."
"What?" Sair asked, for the first time since the final fight, getting a bit of her old emotion back.
"I think it's better for you to leave here," Spike repeated.
"And do what?"
"I don't know," the blond vampire said as he got up and faced her, "Go exploring, find some peace or whatever."
Sair just gave him a slightly confused look.
"Look," Spike said as he crouched in front of her, "All I want is the best for you. I want you to just leave this place, too many bad things happen here."
"Hate to break it to you, but bad things happen everywhere," Sair replied, "Nothing is safe."
"Maybe not," the older of the two replied, "But sometimes less bad things happen away from here. Go somewhere. Back to see Arien and Ni, or maybe to someplace new, I don't care, as long as you're happy."
"But," the younger vampire started with tears in her eyes beginning to form, "I'm happy here with you."
"I'm sorry, but it just can't be that way for a little while," Spike regarded her, "Just think of it as a holiday…..of sorts, I guess. Go, do what makes you happy, and then a day will come when I will come for you, it just can't be right now."
"You promise?" Sair said, tears flowing full force.
"I promise with all my heart," the blond vampire told her as he clasped her hands and placed a small kiss on her forehead.
After a few moments' silence, Sair nodded slowly, and then hugged her brother tightly. She was afraid of losing him again, but that little promise was enough to give her the courage to face her fear and spat in its' face.
She smiled.
Three weeks later, a loudspeaker overhead sounded, "Attention, all passengers boarding flight 363, your plane is now boarding. Attention, all passengers boarding flight 363, your plane is now boarding. Thank you."
The airport was near empty save for the late starters who would want to take a six hour flight at ten at night and landing at four in the morning in England.
Sair looked up to the unknown speaker, "That's me."
Spike walked with her, "Alright, let's get going then."
After walking to the ticket counter and getting checked in, the blond vampire regarded the younger one.
"Now, you'll call me when you get there?" he drilled.
"As soon as the wheels touch the ground," Sair replied as if she knew the answers by heart.
"And Arien and Ni will pick you up at the terminal?"
"Promptly to take me to the villa."
"Good," Spike started, almost out of questions, "And your flight lands?"
"At four twenty-two A.M, okay?"
"Yeah."
"M'am," the ticket lady broke in, "You'll have to board soon."
"Yeah, one minute," Sair regarded her as she turned back to Spike, "Promise you'll write?"
"Promise," he agreed, "And you?"
"Always."
Spike nodded, "Alright then, have fun over there. And remember, I will come for you when the time comes."
Sair just smiled, "I'll hold you to that."
Spike gave her a small hug and parted, "You can."
The young vampire felt a few tears coming on, so she turned quickly and walked down the boarding plank and onto the plane. All the while, Spike watched her go, with a smile on his face.
'It's gonna be all right this time,' he thought.
And for awhile, it was.
(Oooooookaayyyyyy, Kind of a suck ass ending I know (Gets pelted by a full wine bottles) Hey! Don't waste the wine!!! (Pelting stops) But please understand, since so MANY of you (ahem, 4) wanted to get a sequel…well guess what? I HAD TO CHANGE MY BLOODY ENDING!!! But not that I'm complaining, I'm glad you guys wanted a sequel! Does me heart joy! (And yeah, I said me heart, so what??) Anyways, this was more of a wrap up chapter, but I do hope that you liked it, really! But now I'm off to go and start on the second one. I'll update Perfect Imbalance with a new chapter that has a name and summary as soon as I can, so be on the lookout! THANK YOU TO ALL WHO SUPPORTED ME THROUGH THE WAY!!! AND FINI!! -Chasten-chan)