Chapter 6

Max left the house and walked toward the adjoining building. It was a huge open space used as a gym, with a small garage in the back. She stopped midway and watched Ben and Zack through the window. She was on her way to work and it had become a habit now to stop for a moment outside this window to soak up the sight her two brothers presented.

'Habits.' Max mused, 'it's strange how fast the small things we enjoy become rituals for us.'

They'd been in this house just over three weeks, but they'd fallen in an easy pattern very fast. Finding jobs hadn't been hard. With her looks the casinos had been fighting over her. She was the newest croupier in the most fashionable casino in Las Vegas. She worked the nights and stayed with Ben during the days.

Zack spent the days scouting targets for heists, checking up on the rest of their siblings, working out... and the nights, he kept Ben company. The nights she was off, Zack went to the city and pulled the jobs he'd been preparing and she was the one who stayed with Ben.

He still didn't sleep through the night, he'd gotten used to taking naps during the day. When he was feeling particularly safe he chanced resting and sleeping for a while. They'd discovered that if he didn't sleep for too long he could get some rest and not be assaulted by the nightmares.

Well, Ben still had them, it was just the way their brains worked, but he was starting to control the really terrifying ones. Ben didn't always see it but Max was sure it was happening. And what they were doing now helped him with it.

Max focused her gaze back in the two figures in the middle of the spacious room. They were moving in sync, with a grace born from their feline DNA and a concentration bred into them the hard way. They were separated by a few feet and their movements mirrored each other's. The kata they were doing now wasn't familiar to her. It must be one Zack had learnt during his years on the run. He'd been keeping up his training, learning every martial art he could and revising constantly what they'd been shown while at Manticore.

It hadn't surprised her at all. While she'd made good use of what she learned at Manticore for her catburglar stunts, she hadn't wanted to even think of furthering her training. All she wanted was a normal life. But it was no surprise Zack hadn't been the same. He'd been still their CO after all, at least that's what he saw himself as. And anything that helped him in his mission was useful to learn.

Max fixed her attention on Ben. He looked so peaceful, concentrating on his breathing and his next move... This was really good for him.

She turned around and went to the garage to get her bike. The first time she'd seen them training she had been mad at Zack. She didn't think bringing Ben's mind back to training and soldiering was a good idea. But Zack had explained that it had nothing to do with Manticore or soldiering. It was about Ben, and Ben alone. Tai-chi and the other disciplines he'd combined in the katas he was showing Ben helped to center one's energy in themselves. It was mostly about Ben's control over his own body, and through that over his own traitorous mind.

And then Max had wanted to learn them too, and train with them. Zack hadn't told her 'no' but she realized when he left without saying 'yes' either, that he thought it wasn't a good idea. Pushing aside her hurt, she tried to put herself in Zack's place and then in Ben's. What she'd realized was that it was something that bonded Ben and Zack and they needed that. Ben needed that.

The next day Max asked Zack if he'd show her when Ben was sleeping and Zack's honest smile and quick 'yes' had reassured her she'd made the right decision.

Locking the garage door behind her, Max revved up her bike and left for the city, leaving a cloud of dust in her wake.

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Zack caught Max's shadow in the window with his peripheral vision in the middle of a turn. He knew she'd be there. She always was. He was glad these training sessions hadn't put a strain on their relationship. He was all for Max keeping up her training but these particular sessions were for Ben.

Zack stopped in the middle of the kata and watched Ben. At first, Ben had been reluctant to the idea. Not that he didn't want to train, any kind of activity, physical or otherwise, was good to keep himself occupied. But he didn't think this was going to be of any help to him. They'd discussed it at length, and eventually Zack convinced Ben that it would be good for him.

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Ben concentrated on his body. Every movement totally controlled. The only thing on his mind was the next move he had to make. It had been a long, long time since he'd trained for the sake of training, since he'd felt the rush of adrenaline his body produced to meet his needs. He'd forgotten how good it felt to push yourself to your limit and have your body respond just the way you wanted it to. Zack had been right, this was good for him. They made katas for a while and then sparred, and with that his two more pressing needs were met.

The katas were just what he needed to focus. He had felt out of control for so long that it had been quite the surprise to realize he could still command his own body, have it do as he wanted.

The first few days he'd been too keyed up to concentrate and all his moves were a second too late, right behind Zack's. It had only made him feel worse. After all, he was an X5, raised to do this kind of thing. The growing frustration had became anger and he'd been about to explode when that realization had scared him and he'd been paralysed. Zack had been watching him closely, and seeing him frozen, had stopped and waited for Ben to talk.

That was one thing both he and Max had gotten used to do, they never crowded him, whatever happened they waited for Ben to be ready to talk. When Ben felt ready to move again, he'd just picked the kata where he had stopped and continued. He knew Zack wanted him to talk but Ben felt it wasn't the moment then.

The two of them finished the sequence and came to a halt and with the next breath they adopted a fighting stance and started circling each other, waiting for an opportunity to strike.

Sparring with Zack was like nothing he'd ever done before. It was different from the training fights back at Manticore, there weren't any guards breathing down their necks, watching them closely waiting for the tiniest mistake to punish them. And it was different from any kind of 'fighting' he'd done while on the outside.

Here with Zack, it wasn't a fight to the death. And that didn't mean they didn't put everything they had into the fight. Because they did. It was just more of a competition. They tried to overpower each other, gain the upper hand over their adversary, but it all had an easy-going tone. It wasn't strange for one of them to comment on a good move made by the other. Zack even teased him when he pinned Ben down especially fast.

By the time they were drenched in sweat and their breathing was labored they'd been going at it for almost three hours. Ben saw an opening in Zack's defense and lunged forward. It had been a really small gap and Zack, immediately realizing his mistake, was already on his way to rectify, but Ben got there a fraction of second before. With Zack effectively pinned down, Ben rolled onto his back and stayed down, putting an end to the day's training.

Ben's voice broke Zack out of his musings. "What if I can't control this?" Ben said, his voice wasn't loud but the graveness of his words resounded heavily in the silent huge room.

Zack remained silent, letting Ben get it out of his chest.

"What if I can't ever go out on the street on my own again for fear of snapping and losing it?" Ben turned to look at Zack. "I'm tired of being weak and scared, Zack. I'm tired of living in fear."

"You don't have to. You will control them. I know you've been out of it for a long time but you're getting control of your life back, now. You are in charge of yourself, mind and body. 493, not-"

"I don't want to be 493 anymore, Zack." Ben cut him off. "I don't want to be a killing machine again. Didn't we leave that place so that we didn't have to be their pets anymore?" He demanded.

"You ARE 493." Zack responded fiercely, standing up. "It doesn't matter if you answer to the number or the name, Ben, that's who you are. And it doesn't have anything to do with Manticore or killing people. You were genetically engineered. Designed to be perfect. And I'm not gonna let you be ashamed of that fact. To hell with everyone else. You can't hate yourself for being 493 any more than you can hate yourself for having dark blond hair and green eyes. You have to learn to distinguish between Manticore and us, Ben." He paused. "That's something we all have trouble believing, Max isn't there yet, either. But you both need to realize that we are who we are and there is no way of changing that. And I really don't see a reason why you would want to."

Ben gave Zack and incredulous look. "You don't?"

"No." Zack said matter-of-factly. "What, you don't enjoy running faster that anyone else, or jumping higher, being stronger, having that face and body? Being far smarter than the masses around you?"

Ben couldn't deny this so he said nothing. And Zack, having said what he needed to, for now, sat down again next to Ben. Their backs to the wall and their legs straight in front of them. They were silent for a while, reflecting on their conversation.

A memory flashed into Ben's mind and he pushed it to the back of his mind, not ready to deal with it, replacing the unwelcome image with a more recent one of Max looking him in the eyes and fiercely promising that everything would be fine, that he could 'beat this bitch'. His sister's words brought a small smile to his face.

"I don't want to disappoint Max." Ben said softly, grabbing Zack's attention. "She's been so great with all this. Never leaving me. She has so much faith in me... I don't want to fail her." He finished.

Zack looked at Ben, his look as serious as Ben could ever remember it. "I have faith in you, too, Ben. I know you can get through this and come out the winner on the other end. And I'm not gonna let you either." Ben's eyes told Zack how much his words meant to his brother, and he decided it was time to lighten the mood. "Just because I don't touch you all the time or look at you as if you're the most beautiful thing I've seen in my life doesn't mean I don't care." Zack said, trying to keep a straight face.

Ben chuckled and punched him in the shoulder. "Jerk." He said, amusement clear in his eyes and Zack congratulated himself.

Just then the door slammed open and they turned to see Max in the entrance. Zack and Ben looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"What?" Max asked offended, forgetting for an instant why she was back so early.

Suddenly the guys stopped laughing and fixed their eyes on her, effectively bringing her back to her initial purpose.

"Guys, I have a small problem and I'll be gone for a few days, ok?" But they weren't looking at her anymore. They had sprung to their feet and were facing off. "Hey, knock it off! I'm gone now so forget it." She turned around and grabbed the bag she'd left just outside the door, jumped on her bike and sped away, hoping once she left the house Ben and Zack would get their bearings back and not come to blows. She'd been careful to pay attention and had left at the first symptoms. Her pheromones couldn't have been strong enough to be too overpowering.

The moment she was out of sight, Ben and Zack shook their heads to clear them and then looked at each other. Ben had a confused expression on his face and Zack had to laugh.

"She's in heat." He said simply.

Ben was shocked for an instant and then a knowing expression overcame his face. "As absolutely senseless as that sounds it actually makes sense, a Manticore twisted sick kinda sense, but sense nonetheless." He said. "So... we would've kicked each other's ass for her, huh? That would have made for a hell of an awkward morning after." Ben said smiling.

"Yeah, tell me about it." Zack said softly, almost unconsciously, and Ben looked at him surprised. "Jondy." Zack said as an explanation and turned around, clearly not wanting to dwell on it.

TBC

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