The back of Haley's hand rested against her forehead as she tried her best to rid herself of the headache that she now sported. This was not good.
This was not good at all. Not only did she manage to put herself into one hell of a mess, she dragged Lucas into it too. What was she supposed to tell him now? What if Ally asked him something?
Haley resisted the urge to scream as she closed her eyes tightly, willing her problems to just disappear.
Hearing the phone ring, her hand sprung out, grabbing at air for a few moments before it blindly found the ringing phone. Irritated, she asked, "What?"
A deep laugh traveled over the line as Nathan said, "Wow, are you ever going to greet me properly?"
"Oh, Nathan," she said softly, her headache already beginning to fade away. "What is it?"
"You said I could call." He paused, "Remember?"
Oh, yes. She did remember. "Right, but I'm supposed to be mad at you."
"What? Cuz of what happened in class with Ally."
"You think?"
"She didn't find out. And, besides, why do we have to keep this from her?"
"Nathan, you can't possibly be that blind." Haley sighed, did Nathan know about Allyson's feelings or didn't he? She never did get a straight answer.
"I know she has a thing for me but she's not gonna flip just cuz I'm talking to you."
"I'm supposed to hate you," she argued, "I can't hate you and have pleasant conversations with you at the same time. Kinda contradicting don't you think?"
Nathan paused and then smiled, "You don't hate me?"
"That's not the point," Haley smacked herself upside the head. She just had to open her big mouth.
"Well, it is now."
"Nathan, stop being difficult," she said, trying not laugh as she could picture the pout on his face. Shaking her head, she was slightly disturbed at how she was already in this stage. Oh boy, she liked him alright. And she liked him a lot. This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all.
"I'm sorry. My naughty side just seems to come out when I'm around you."
Laughing, Haley shook her head and sighed, "You're terrible, you know that right?"
"I'll take what I can get."
"So, is there a reason you called other then because I said you could?"
"I need some help on some homework."
"I can't talk right now. I'll call you in a few hours though."
"I'll be waiting."
Laughing again at his words, Haley hung up the phone, a smile plastered onto her face. How did he manage to do that? No problems tainted her mind, nothing except an image of him, in his bed, talking to her, the cocky grin on his face. While before that image might have disgusted her, now it was nothing but appealing.
She couldn't like him though. She found him annoying and aggravating and.... bad. Besides, Allyson liked him. Allyson liked him a lot and she could never do that to her best friend.
It couldn't work between them. Could it?
Before she could put anymore thought to it, Allyson bounded into the room, a glass of juice in her hands. "Here, I brought you some of that Simply Orange stuff that you like."
"Thanks," Haley muttered before taking it and gulping it down.
"Were you talking to someone?"
Nearly choking, Haley shook her head negatively, "Nope, just myself."
Raising an eyebrow, Allyson grinned before saying, "You need to get out more."
--
Swish. Nothing but net. Smiling, Nathan retrieved the ball before bouncing it a few times and then made another shot. This time, it bounced off the rim and down the small court behind his house. Turning around, he saw a disappointed look on his father's face and the basketball in his hands.
"How could you miss a shot like that?"
Feeling the pride drain out of him, Nathan let out an aggravated sigh before shrugging, "It's just one shot."
"And, you missed it. Completely. You've been slacking lately. I haven't seen you practice as much."
"I've had a lot of work with school."
"Your homework?" Dan questioned, "That never got in the way before."
"Well, that's because I'm actually starting to care now. I've been failing english and I've gotta get my grades up."
"English?" Dan repeated, the anger obvious in his voice, "English is more important than your future?"
"No," Nathan retorted. How did he always manage to do this? His father shouldn't be making him feel guilty for trying to get better grades. He expected some words of good will and support, not this.
"Then start practicing more," Dan spat before he threw the ball back at Nathan. "I think we need to do some more conditioning. Be up tomorrow at 5. We're going for a run."
"Dad-"
"No excuses," Dan said shortly before storming off.
Letting out a heavy sigh, Nathan turned around and made one last shot.
He missed.
--
Walking into his room, Nathan slammed his door before walking over to his stereo, turning up the volume, letting the music rid him of his frustrations. Hearing the phone ring, he turned it down before answering, "Yeah?"
"Hey," Haley said cautiously, "You okay?" She paused. Wait a second, she wasn't supposed to care. She didn't care. Really. She didn't.
"Yeah," Nathan lied though it didn't even sound convincing to his own ears, "I'm good."
"So umm," she said, slightly uncomfortable, "You needed help?"
He flinched, the subject hitting a nerve inside him, "You know what," he turned the basketball in his hands, "I figured it out."
"You did?" Haley asked, slightly surprised though she felt a sense of pride, "Well, I'm glad."
"Yeah, so, I gotta go."
"Well, ok-" Before she could get out her sentence, she heard the dial tone. Frowning, she hung up her phone, trying to shake off the feeling of something wrong. And, people thought women were confusing? She just couldn't figure Nathan Scott out.
Not that she wanted to.
Haley let out a sigh of frustration. She really had to stop doing this to herself.
--
Haley dropped her books off at her first period class in a hurry before running out into the hallway, hoping to catch Lucas before Allyson did. Spotting a particular blonde in the hallway, she bolted past the other students before yelling, "Lucas!"
Turning around, a goofy grin was on his face as he watched Haley James run towards him.
Grateful that he turned around, Haley paid no attention to where she was going. That is, until she tripped over someone's backpack and straight into Lucas' arms. "Oh god."
Laughing, Lucas caught her in time and helped Haley regain her balance. The brunette muttered a quick apology to the owner of the backpack before she grabbed Lucas by the arm and dragged him down the hallway.
"Geez, excited to see me?"
"You're not funny, Lucas."
Grinning, he shrugged and asked, "So, what's the big deal?"
Haley bit her lip before saying, "I screwed up."
"What?"
"Really badly. You have to promise me you won't be mad."
"Haley James, what did you do now?" Lucas asked, his voice teasing.
"Okay, you know how you like Ally, right?"
"What, wait, I don't-"
"Don't lie to me. I'm not dumb," Haley said with a knowing smile, "She doesn't know. See, that's part of the problem."
"Haley, you're not making much sense here."
"I'm trying!" She said hurriedly before pausing and taking a deep breath, "Okay, Ally thinks that I like you when I really don't. I mean, you're nice and cute and all but really not my type. Too broody," she joked, "Besides, I think the 'I'm in love with Lucas' club is a bit full at the moment."
Lucas smiled before his eyes travelled down the hallway. They immediately lost it's glimmer it had only moments before.
Haley's brow furrowed. She turned around and saw what Lucas was watching.
Ally with Nathan. Nathan brushed the hair away from Allyson's face as he leaned down to give her a tight hug. But, he wasn't paying any attention to her or the close proximity of Allyson's body. His eyes were focused straight on Haley.
Feeling a pang in her heart, Haley frowned. Why did she feel like this? She wasn't supposed to care.
Pushing away the hurt, she turned back around to Lucas and touched his arm, grabbing his attention. "I just wanted to tell you that," she said softly, not understanding why she felt this way, "Before she said something and you got all confused." Forcing a smile, Haley looked up at him for an answer.
His eyes were still focused on Ally and Nathan before he looked back at Haley, "Gotcha."
Without saying anything else, he walked away, leaving Haley alone.
The bell rang. She didn't seem to notice.
--
Haley rested the side of her head against her open palm as she stared at the clock, wishing for it to slow down or speed up. She didn't want fourth period to come.
She didn't want to see him.
Normally, she would've been looking forward to this. The days before because she got to get away from the lectures and homework. Lately, because she got to see Nathan. And, if she were her normal self, today, she could yell at him and demand an explanation for why he was deliberately trying to get to her and not in a good way.
But, all she could do now is pout and sigh repeatedly. It wasn't even that big of a deal. It was just a hug. Just a hug. It could've been friendly. It was friendly. Really, it was.
Haley knew she was lying to herself. She knew that Nathan did it on purpose, even when she made him promise he wouldn't. He was supposed to stay away from Allyson and stop messing with her head.
She should've known he would never have kept his word. He found too much pleasure in other's misery. And, she was just another stupid girl added to that list of many which he hurt.
Well, she wouldn't let him get to her. Not her. She was Haley James and she didn't give a damn why he did the things he did. She would go into that tutoring room and help him out with whatever he needed.
No more. No less.
--
Nathan sighed as the bell ring, a part of him looking forward to the next period while the other felt only guilt. He didn't know why he acted the way he did. With the pressure that he received from his father and the anger he felt towards him, he seemed to be lashing out at everyone and anyone. Allyson saw him this morning, greeted him and after he saw Lucas with Haley, he just grabbed her and hugged her, making sure Haley saw. He saw the pain in her eyes and he enjoyed it. For awhile at least.
Now, it hurt more then it healed. He didn't know why he did it.
That was a lie. He did. He wanted to hurt her. He wanted to hurt her because he was confused because she hurt him by falling into Lucas' arms and treating Lucas like they were best friends. He felt jealousy and confusion and anger. So, he struck out.
He felt nothing but regret now. Haley was never supposed to be on the receiving end of this. But, why did he care so much? She was just his tutor and someone he could mess around with. She wasn't supposed to be something... more.
But, she was.
--
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Haley turned her head and watched as the drops of rain fell against the window. Mezmerized momentarily, she watched one particular rain drop slide down the window before settling at the bottom and then dispersing to join the puddle that had formed by the window sill.
It had some symbolic significance of her life lately. She never used to be like this. Before, she never would've pictured herself in this position. She would never have cared what Nathan Scott or any other basketball idiot cared about her or what she did. She wouldn't have even bothered to talk to them but now, it seemed she was falling right into the conforming crowd. Joining the list of those who got hurt and humiliated.
And, this was all it was. A humiliation. Nathan Scott had achieved the ultimate goal. He made her feel and he made her hurt. He made her care. He wanted to mess with her head and he did.
She fell for it. Just like every other girl in this school, she did. She thought she was better then this. She thought she was smarter then to fall for his charming smile or words. She thought she had more sense.
She didn't. She couldn't control her emotions. Then again, who could?
Sighing, she pushed her thoughts away and looked up at the bell, it was already 10 minutes into the hour. Looking around, she suddenly felt stifled and sick. She couldn't stay here in school anymore, she just wanted to get away. Away from the drama, overthinking, overanalyzing, and just.. away.
She had never ditched school before. But, heck, there was a first time for everything. Picking up her backpack, she rushed out of the tutoring room and walked down the hallway at a normal pace, not wanting to raise suspicions.
Not paying attention to where she was going yet again, she ran into a hard body. Looking up, she saw the blue eyes of the one and only, Nathan Scott.
While only 24 hours before, she would've smiled or made a smart comment, now, she merely forced herself to make no reaction. She wasn't going to let him get to her again and that meant she would have to stop caring. Even if she had to force herself.
"Sorry," he muttered quietly before standing back in silence.
Both simply stared at each other before Nathan, uncomfortable with the way things were going said, "Are you still going to tutor me?"
"I'm required to," Haley said flatly before turning around and walking back to the tutoring room. Without checking to see if he was following, she entered the room and set her bookbag down. Getting out her supplies, she took a sharp intake of breath when he pulled up a chair and sat down next to her. And close. She could feel the heat radiating off his body. Clearing her throat, she closed her eyes before digging her nails into the palm of her hands and moving the chair farther away. Not commenting, she pulled out a notebook and pen.
"I found some lyrics."
"Good," she said as she reached out her hand, "Let me see."
He put the printed piece of paper in her hands. Nathan watched her closely as she read over the lyrics.
Knowing the song, she silently hummed the tune to herself as she read.
One boy, one girl, two hearts, their world
Time goes by, secrets rise
One more, sad song, tears shed
She'd take it back, if she only could
Best friend, worst thing, she's been, cheating
Friend deceives, she leaves
Last date. She cries, whispers, goodbye
She walks once more, out that door
Please stay, don't go away
The hardest thing is letting go of you
Stay, don't go away
The hardest thing is letting go of you
What can I do?
"Why'd you choose this one?" She whispered hoarsely before clearing her throat. These lyrics hit too close. Too close to home. Too close to her heart. Too close to her whole situation.
"I liked the title," he admitted sheepishly before shrugging, "I've never heard them before. Not my type of music."
"They're good," she said quietly, "You'd like them."
"I'm not sure if your english teacher would like lyrics from the All American Rejects though."
"Whatever, it's my project."
"Your grade," Haley said before she tapped her pen against the notebook, "So, how does it make you feel?"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well, the first step in analyzing is to create certain points of view. We'll start out with yours. How do these lyrics make you feel?"
"Lonely," he admitted. "And angry and confused and frustrated," Nathan said, his voice tense, "And annoyed and god," he said angrily before rolling his hand into a fist.
Trying not to react to his current state, Haley simply nodded, "Okay. So all not so good feelings. Now, do you think the lyrics have a hidden meaning?"
"Why are you doing this?" Nathan demanded.
"What?" She asked, surprised. That was the only emotion she had shown so far with him.
"This, why are you being so.. cold?"
"I'm not."
"Are you mad at me or something?"
Flipping her notebook closed she shrugged, "So, what if I am?"
"Then I want to know why?"
"It doesn't matter," she said quietly before putting her notebook and pen back into her backpack.
"It does matter."
"Why?"
"What?" Nathan asked, confused.
"You heard me."
"What do you mean why? It just matters."
"Why does it matter? I'm just your tutor. You shouldn't care if I'm mad at your or not."
"Well, I do," Nathan said, frustrated with the way she was treating him, "I care." He said quietly, "Even if I shouldn't."
Looking into his eyes, Haley resisted the urge to come clean with her emotions. He was just messing with her again. If she let down her guard and got closer with him, he would only hurt her. Like he did this morning. If a simple hug could effect her this much, goodness knows what damage he could do to her. She didn't want to find out. She didn't want to get hurt.
She was scared.
Packing up her backpack, she stood up and said flatly, "You're right. You shouldn't."
Nathan made no move as she walked away. He simply stared ahead, biting his tongue.
The door slammed as she walked out. He drew blood.