The Rainbow Connection #4: And Rainbows Have Nothing to Hide
Sorry this took so long, guys. I'd promise y'all a rose garden, faster updates, etc. etc…but it's very possible that I'd be lying, so I won't. Enjoy, and hope the next comes sooner.
The forests surrounding Valdez, Alaska had always held a sense of comfort and security for Will. In the summer, the verdant, lush forests rang with the melodious sounds of the local wildlife, providing him with a calm atmosphere that could clear the head and reveal a new path.
That was why Deanna had come here, to this particular program in the holodeck. She needed some sense of peace to give her the clarity she desperately needed. She wanted to erase the troubled look in her eyes, to ease the lines of doubt from her face. She needed to be sure she'd done the right thing.
Naturally, she thought to herself as she wandered through the forest, I have to do this myself. There's no one to do it for me. She ducked under a low branch, her depthless, worried eyes studying what she'd stumbled into.
She stood now in a clearing with two decently-sized, perfect-for-sitting-on boulders in the middle of it. From where she stood, she could see that several paths led in and out of this clearing, twisting and turning back into the forest.
She let out a small laugh. "If this isn't somehow fitting, I don't know what is." Making her way to a boulder and sitting pensively on it. She ran a hand through her luscious brown hair, just beginning to streak with gray. "I'm getting older," she murmured. "It's time I settled down, had a husband and children." She paused, a memory stirring in her mind causing the corners of her lips to tilt upward. "Just like Mother's been hounding me to do, for all these years." She could hear her mother now, see her as clearly as though she sat on the rock next to her.
Darling, Commander Riker is perfect for you! Oh, get him, come home, and we'll celebrate in a way befitting a daughter of the Fifth House!
"No," Deanna whispered. "That isn't what I want."
Isn't it? The wide-eyed echo of Lwaxana asked.
"No," Deanna repeated.
Oh, Little One, you can't run from him forever.
"No," she said again, "but time away--time to think--is what I need." She could make a better decision away from him, in a place where she could figure things out.
"Betazed?" Jean-Luc Picard echoed his counselor, who stood before him in his ready room. "You want some shore leave time?"
She nodded. "Please, Captain."
"Deanna, I don't mean to pry, but…" Jean-Luc turned sympathetic eyes to her, motioning her to sit, "…if this is about Will…"
She sat miserably in a chair. "So you know."
He gave her a small smile, folding his hands in front of him. "There's hardly a person onboard who doesn't."
A weak laugh came from Deanna, filled with embarrassment, defeat, frustration, and irony. "At least I'm fueling the gossip channels," she managed.
"Deanna, if you're going to Betazed to escape him…"
"I'm not, Captain. I just need time--"
"--to figure things out." The captain smiled gently. "Yes, I thought as much. But if I may, I'd like to offer you some advice."
"Any help is appreciated." Deanna leaned forward eagerly.
"Erase all other voices from your mind, except your own, and listen to it." He smiled at her fondly. "You're cleared to leave tomorrow."
It was late when she stood expectantly outside Will's quarters. She'd finished with her travel arrangements and her packing, but she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she left without telling him she was.
Will answered her chime, bleary-eyed and disheveled. She'd woken him up. "Oh, I'm sorry, Will, I--"
"It's all right, Deanna." Even when half-asleep he was jovial. "Do you want to come in?"
She caught the plea in his eyes and voice, but strengthened her resolve. "I can't, Will. I only came to say goodbye." The plea in his eyes vanished and turned into a blue ocean of indescribable anguish that threatened to drown her. "I'm leaving in the morning for Betazed," she finished, averting her eyes from his. She stood uncomfortably for a moment while Will digested her words.
"Well," he finally said. "I hope you have a good trip."
She offered a small smile, bringing her eyes back to look at him. "Maybe I'll have better news for you when I get back." Ignoring his dumbstruck stare at her, she turned and went back to her quarters.