Spoof Valentine time! I got tired of normal Valentines, so it's time for
spoofs on rumours, books, theories, and fanfiction! You will get to see
Harry's reply, which you wouldn't normally. There will be some semi-normal
one's thrown in there.
Potter! If you receive one more Valentine in my class, I shall be forced to give you detention. That said, happy Valentine's Day.
-Professor M. McGonagall
But Professor! It's not my fault and I am serving detention with Professor Snape all ready! Why not give Lockhart the detention? -Best wishes, happy Valentine's Day,
Harry Potter
An excellent point! I shall take it up with Albus...er, I mean...hem hem, Headmaster Dumbledore!
-Prof. M. McG.
Um, Professor? Umbridge doesn't come until fifth year. Have you been skipping ahead? Happy V. D.
-H.P.
Harry, will you go out with me? I think you're special! ; )
-Alana Rickeman
Potter, enjoy your Valentine's Day...it might be your last.
-Diary Tom Riddle, who was once, will be, and is also known as Lord Voldemort, as written by Ginny Weasely...but of course you don't know that.
Happy Valentine's Day! Hope it's a great one!
-Kat Greta-Zones
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one, so I never have to live a day without you.
-Winnie the Pooh
-Neville Longbottom (I think Neville's sweet!)
Unscramble the letters Harry!
-Gred and Forge
Gold rot ham core smere this hefeiry! Answer Moldyfart is gone...here comes the real heir!
Dear Harry Potter sir,
It is vital for your future, as well as that of the wizarding world, that you study instead of indulging yourself with your love life and your numerous valentines. That said, I suppose I should wish you a happy valentines day. I hope it was interesting to say the least.
-Percy Weasely
Oh, shut-up. I heard you betray us in the fifth book anyway...Weatherby!
-H.P.
Dear Harry Potter,
I have received word that I redeem myself in the last two books.
-P.W.
Redeem yourself? Why Percy, I though you got over your bedwetting thing in my first year?
-H.P.
I love you Harry! Can I please, please, please have your autograph? I would really like to meet you, except it wouldn't be acceptable for a young witch my age, with my Christian society, so I must decline you the pleasure. However, we could embark on a simple stroll that results in us realizing we're meant for each other, though of course we could never officially be. But unofficially...
-Lindsay Jollip
Dear Harry,
I know that you do not know who I am and for that I do not blame you. I am the reason your father, along with Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew became animagi........................................................................................................................................................................................................... So that's what happened from the time I was bitten until your fifth year! Just thought you ought to know! Happy Valentines Day!
-Remus Lupin
Ah, well that will be very helpful, I'm sure. Now, I have this enemy, Lord Voldemort you know...do you think you could take care of him during one of your monthly things? That would help me a lot, and since I asked you to do it, I would be fulfilling this prophecy thing...Oh and happy V.D. to you as well!
-H.P.
Anytime Harry! I'm here for you until I go mad with grief over Sirius's death, at which time I will only be able to give good advice on how to tell your best living friend that you secretly have a man crus-
Not reading this, not my innocent, naïve, virgin hero eyes!
-H.P.
Oh, so sorry, never meant to offend!
-R.L.
snorts
-H.P.
So like your father! I'm so proud I'm not really Remus Lupin and am actually your father in Remus's body using switching spells, though I'm wondering how long I have to keep up this whole Sirius/Remus thing for the fans...cause I'm really James...even if the fans came up with that one too...sigh.
-R.L. A.K.A. J.P.
Dear Harry Potter,
I fortell a fraud in your future, my dear. Yes, my dearest Harry, I see her now, large glasses, like a glittering insect empress...squishies in your path, I see. My crystal ball is feeling a little doozie, I believe I'll take a rest, though I give you this warning on the day of love and betrayal alike...yes...
-Professor Sibyl Trelawney
Potter! If you receive one more Valentine in my class, I shall be forced to give you detention. That said, happy Valentine's Day.
-Professor M. McGonagall
But Professor! It's not my fault and I am serving detention with Professor Snape all ready! Why not give Lockhart the detention? -Best wishes, happy Valentine's Day,
Harry Potter
An excellent point! I shall take it up with Albus...er, I mean...hem hem, Headmaster Dumbledore!
-Prof. M. McG.
Um, Professor? Umbridge doesn't come until fifth year. Have you been skipping ahead? Happy V. D.
-H.P.
Harry, will you go out with me? I think you're special! ; )
-Alana Rickeman
Potter, enjoy your Valentine's Day...it might be your last.
-Diary Tom Riddle, who was once, will be, and is also known as Lord Voldemort, as written by Ginny Weasely...but of course you don't know that.
Happy Valentine's Day! Hope it's a great one!
-Kat Greta-Zones
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one, so I never have to live a day without you.
-Winnie the Pooh
-Neville Longbottom (I think Neville's sweet!)
Unscramble the letters Harry!
-Gred and Forge
Gold rot ham core smere this hefeiry! Answer Moldyfart is gone...here comes the real heir!
Dear Harry Potter sir,
It is vital for your future, as well as that of the wizarding world, that you study instead of indulging yourself with your love life and your numerous valentines. That said, I suppose I should wish you a happy valentines day. I hope it was interesting to say the least.
-Percy Weasely
Oh, shut-up. I heard you betray us in the fifth book anyway...Weatherby!
-H.P.
Dear Harry Potter,
I have received word that I redeem myself in the last two books.
-P.W.
Redeem yourself? Why Percy, I though you got over your bedwetting thing in my first year?
-H.P.
I love you Harry! Can I please, please, please have your autograph? I would really like to meet you, except it wouldn't be acceptable for a young witch my age, with my Christian society, so I must decline you the pleasure. However, we could embark on a simple stroll that results in us realizing we're meant for each other, though of course we could never officially be. But unofficially...
-Lindsay Jollip
Dear Harry,
I know that you do not know who I am and for that I do not blame you. I am the reason your father, along with Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew became animagi........................................................................................................................................................................................................... So that's what happened from the time I was bitten until your fifth year! Just thought you ought to know! Happy Valentines Day!
-Remus Lupin
Ah, well that will be very helpful, I'm sure. Now, I have this enemy, Lord Voldemort you know...do you think you could take care of him during one of your monthly things? That would help me a lot, and since I asked you to do it, I would be fulfilling this prophecy thing...Oh and happy V.D. to you as well!
-H.P.
Anytime Harry! I'm here for you until I go mad with grief over Sirius's death, at which time I will only be able to give good advice on how to tell your best living friend that you secretly have a man crus-
Not reading this, not my innocent, naïve, virgin hero eyes!
-H.P.
Oh, so sorry, never meant to offend!
-R.L.
snorts
-H.P.
So like your father! I'm so proud I'm not really Remus Lupin and am actually your father in Remus's body using switching spells, though I'm wondering how long I have to keep up this whole Sirius/Remus thing for the fans...cause I'm really James...even if the fans came up with that one too...sigh.
-R.L. A.K.A. J.P.
Dear Harry Potter,
I fortell a fraud in your future, my dear. Yes, my dearest Harry, I see her now, large glasses, like a glittering insect empress...squishies in your path, I see. My crystal ball is feeling a little doozie, I believe I'll take a rest, though I give you this warning on the day of love and betrayal alike...yes...
-Professor Sibyl Trelawney