Part Nineteen
When Karen arrived at Yvonne's, complete with bikini, her anger had worked itself up in to a fury Yvonne hadn't seen since she'd tried to get over the wall after the O'kane fiasco.
"What the hell's eaten you?" Asked Yvonne, opening the door to her.
"Bloody Neil Grayling!"
"Why, what's he done?" Then, on seeing just how wound up Karen was, she gestured up the stairs and said,
"Swim first and talk later. You'll find a towel in the airing cupboard." When Karen appeared in the garden a few minutes later, she found Yvonne and Roisin sunbathing, Cassie languishing in the pool and Lauren stood in the middle of the lawn giving Trigger a brush. Karen was wearing a simple black bikini which accentuated her cleavage to perfection. Cassie who had been laughing at something Lauren had said, almost lost her footing when she saw Karen, who threw a large blue towel on to one of the sun loungers and moved towards the edge of the pool. Cassie just stared at her, mouth agape. Yvonne took one look at Cassie and laughed.
"Cassie, put your tongue back in," She said, quite unable to take the grin off her face. Cassie came back to her senses and said,
"So that's what you've been hiding under all those suits." Under normal circumstances, Karen had legs to die for, but clad in only a brief black bikini, her legs seemed to go on for ever and Cassie privately thought that she could get lost in a cleavage like that. The coolness of the water seemed to soothe Karen's crackling nerves. She moved swiftly through the water, working off her anger. When her rage began to subside, she simply allowed herself to drift from one end of the pool to the other. Roisin was flicking through a magazine, whilst Yvonne sorted through the day's post. Karen was listening with half an ear to Cassie and Lauren's conversation, but she was mainly giving her brain a chance to relax. As she lay on her back, gently moving her arms to keep herself afloat, she could gradually feel the hurt and anger at Neil's deception draining out of her. She could get used to the surroundings of Yvonne's house, she realised, and that in itself was a mark of how much she'd changed over the last year. When had her metamorphosis begun, she wasn't sure. Was it when Fenner had raped her, or was it even further back, when she'd found his porn mag and Maxi's knickers, she didn't know. She'd been with no man since Ritchie, and that was over a year ago now. Yes, she knew that she was currently emotionally raw, both from the effects of the trial and her total undoing with Yvonne the night before. But in spite of all this, Karen thought she might for the first time in her life, be on the verge of being happy with what she had. Yes, she missed having someone to hold her at night, she missed that feeling of completeness that only waking up with someone could bring, but this was an emptiness she was learning to accept. She also thought that maybe the lack of sexual company didn't matter to her so much because she'd found such a good friend in Yvonne. Female friends weren't something she'd ever gone in for in a big way as a rule, but with Yvonne it was different. After Ritchie had been shot, her and Yvonne seemed to gravitate towards each other, both seeking the same level of reassurance with the knowledge that they were both terrible mothers. When she'd taken Yvonne for that drink, after visiting Ritchie, that had felt like the most normal thing Karen had done in a long time. Ever since Yvonne had been released, they'd kept up their friendship, even though Karen had fully expected Yvonne to totally forget her existence.
When she finally dragged herself out of the all too addictive water, Karen briefly dried herself off with a towel and spralled on one of the sunloungers. Taking a swig of the Scotch Yvonne had poured for her, she reflected that she couldn't possibly be in better surroundings. The sun beat down on her body, and she felt for the most part content.
"So, what was all that about in court this afternoon?" Asked Yvonne.
"Fenner clearly took the opportunity of telling the defense barrister all about the supposed fake allegation."
"So, what's Grayling got to do with this?"
"When I went to the police about Fenner last year, I naturally had to tell Neil about it. With two of his staff at opposite ends of a possible court case, he would have had a conflict of interest. So, a little while after this, he called me in to his office, saying that he'd spoken to someone in the CPS who had told him that they weren't going to take up the case. He managed to persuade me that it was in my best interest to drop the charge before the police did." Yvonne was looking very interested by this time.
"Is that what the judge wanted to see you about?" Yvonne asked.
"Yes, he wanted to know why the case hadn't been pursued. It turns out that Neil Grayling didn't speak to anyone in the CPS at all. The person he told me he had spoken to doesn't even exist."
"You what?"
"Yeah, I know. The judge is going to look in to it and find out exactly who Grayling did speak too. He had to have talked to someone to know that the case wasn't going to be taken up."
"The conniving little wanker," Was Yvonne's summing up of the situation.
"Quite."
"And I'll give you one guess why Grayling wanted you to drop the case against Fenner," Yvonne continued. "He wanted something to hold over Fenner so that Fenner would have to owe him one."
"Takes one to know one, Mum," Said Lauren affectionately. Yvonne playfully swatted at her with the mastercard bill that was lying on the table. Cassie, having heard part of the conversation, got out of the pool and walked towards them dripping water over Roisin's slowly tanning body as she passed.
"What's Fenner done now?" She asked. The sudden silence that greeted her question was deafening. "What've I said?" Asked Cassie, feeling like she'd walked in on a conversation not meant for her ears.
"Cass, I don't think you were meant to ask," Roisin pointed out quietly. Cassie blushed slightly.
"Sorry," She said, "Me and my big mouth." Karen broke the silence by asking,
"Can I borrow your shower?"
"Sure, said Yvonne. There's numerous bathrooms upstairs so take your pick." When Karen had gone upstairs, Yvonne said,
"It isn't my story to tell, Cassie."
"Yeah, I gathered that," Replied Cassie. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Said Yvonne quietly.
"Was it something he did to her?" Asked Roisin.
"That's obvious," Replied Cassie.
"This is Fenner we're talking about," put in lauren. "Mum, going on what the defense tried to ask her about in court, I'm assuming he raped her."
"Lauren, it isn't up to me to tell you this."
"He did, didn't he?" Persisted Cassie.
"Yes, he did. Now can we drop it?"
"God, poor Karen," murmured Roisin.
"Which is precisely why this doesn't get talked about," Said Yvonne, her voice growing firm. "Is that clear?" It needed none of them to verrify that it was.
When Karen reappeared some time later, Cassie privately thought that she looked almost overdressed.
"Are you okay?" Asked Yvonne quietly, thinking that Cassie's untimely question had possibly undone all the good work of the relaxing swim.
"I will be," Replied Karen. "I've got to check up on how Di and Sylvia are coping in my absence, so I'd better be off."
"I can think of better ways to finish off a bad day," Said Yvonne.
"The joys of being a wing governor I'm afraid. I'll see you tomorrow." When Karen had left, Yvonne went in to her kitchen and began chopping vegetables for a bolognaise.
"Are you two staying for tea?" She asked Cassie and Roisin.
"If you're cooking," Replied Cassie, "Definitely."
"Bloody cheek, Cassie Tyler," said Roisin in mock affrontedness. Then, turning to Yvonne she said, "This one lived out of the microwave or restaurants before she met me."
"Yeah, I bet she did."
"Can I do anything?" Asked Roisin.
"You can come and keep me company while lazy arse over there tops up her tan," Yvonne said, gesturing to Cassie who was undoing her bikini top with the clear intent of sunbathing topless.
"You don't mind?" she asked Yvonne over her shoulder.
"No," Said Yvonne, taking note of Lauren's brief appraising glance in Cassie's direction. "why do you think this garden is as enclosed as possible."
Once away from the prying ears of her nearest and dearest, Roisin asked,
"What happened with Karen and Fenner's really getting to you, isn't it?" Yvonne loathed the sound of Karen's and Fenner's names spoken together like that, but she tried not to show it.
"Yeah, a bit," She conceded. "I feel so useless. It happened over a year ago and she hasn't even begun to deal with it, and I haven't got a clue how to help her."
"When did she tell you about it?"
"Last night. I've known her as a friend since before I got out, and she couldn't tell me any of this until it was absolutely necessary. Does that make me a shit friend or what."
"Good god, Yvonne, give yourself a break will you. Telling anyone about such a painful thing is something we only ever do when we have too. It isn't something anyone usually does by choice."
"It totally did her in talking about it."
"That's hardly a surprise."
"But what the hell am I supposed to do? I've never seen Karen like that, not ever. She's always been the strong one, the together one, the one out of both of us who could deal with whatever life threw at her." Roisin smiled.
"Yvonne, will you listen to yourself for a minute. You've just given a perfect description of not just Karen, but you as well. You're both incredibly similar, you know."
"Yeah, right, one a screw, the other an ex-con, really similar."
"Yvonne, for once in your life, listen to me. You and Karen are probably two of the strongest women I've ever met. Much as I love Cassie, strong as steel is something she'll never be, no matter how much she makes out she is. But just because someone appears to be in total control of everything they do, doesn't mean they can't have weak points. We all have areas of our lives where we are incredibly vulnerable. Clearly what happened with Fenner is Karen's."
"I just don't know how I can get her through this."
"You can't," Said Roisin softly. "It's something only she can do. All you can do is to be there for her when she wants you, and not to crowd her when she doesn't. The fact that she opened up to you at all is a good sign. It proves she trusts you."
"Apart from some nameless copper, I'm the first person she's ever given details too."
"There you are, then. In the beginning, Cassie was there for me, as a friend, and I couldn't have done without her. Just do the same for Karen."
"Did this happen to you?" Asked Yvonne.
"Yeah," Replied Roisin. "Aiden occasionally took the Roman Catholic tradition of a husband's rights to the letter."
"I'm sorry," Said Yvonne, thinking that far too many men had a lot to answer for.
"That's how I know that Karen probably has mixed feelings about telling anyone about what happened to her. She'll feel like it was her fault, and she'll feel ashamed. The best thing you can do is to keep letting her know that she didn't deserve it and that you're there for her." Roisin moved forward and gave Yvonne a hug. "Just don't forget that as her friend, you might have to offload occasionally too."
"I hope you're not leading my mum astray," Came Lauren's voice from the doorway.
"I don't think your mother needs leading astray," Said Roisin going out in to the garden to see how Cassie's tan was doing.
"You all right?" Asked Lauren.
"Yeah," Replied Yvonne, a little shell-shocked from her conversation with Roisin. "There's something you should know. I made a threat to Fenner this morning that after his performance today I'm going to have to follow up on."
"so, that's why you went to court early?"
"Something like that. I told him that if he either laid another finger on Karen, or if he kept his promise to discredit Karen's evidence, I'd have him nailed."
"Shit, Mum!"
"I know, I know. But what was I supposed to do, sit back and do nothing?"
"No, I guess not. But I take it you don't want to end up back inside?"
"no, and if I've got anything to do with it you're not going there either."
"Okay, leave it with me and I'll see what we can do about that evil bastard."
"If he's a good little boy and tells the truth in court tomorrow, then maybe I'll think about leaving him alone. But if he doesn't keep to the deal, I want him out of the picture for good."
When Karen arrived at Yvonne's, complete with bikini, her anger had worked itself up in to a fury Yvonne hadn't seen since she'd tried to get over the wall after the O'kane fiasco.
"What the hell's eaten you?" Asked Yvonne, opening the door to her.
"Bloody Neil Grayling!"
"Why, what's he done?" Then, on seeing just how wound up Karen was, she gestured up the stairs and said,
"Swim first and talk later. You'll find a towel in the airing cupboard." When Karen appeared in the garden a few minutes later, she found Yvonne and Roisin sunbathing, Cassie languishing in the pool and Lauren stood in the middle of the lawn giving Trigger a brush. Karen was wearing a simple black bikini which accentuated her cleavage to perfection. Cassie who had been laughing at something Lauren had said, almost lost her footing when she saw Karen, who threw a large blue towel on to one of the sun loungers and moved towards the edge of the pool. Cassie just stared at her, mouth agape. Yvonne took one look at Cassie and laughed.
"Cassie, put your tongue back in," She said, quite unable to take the grin off her face. Cassie came back to her senses and said,
"So that's what you've been hiding under all those suits." Under normal circumstances, Karen had legs to die for, but clad in only a brief black bikini, her legs seemed to go on for ever and Cassie privately thought that she could get lost in a cleavage like that. The coolness of the water seemed to soothe Karen's crackling nerves. She moved swiftly through the water, working off her anger. When her rage began to subside, she simply allowed herself to drift from one end of the pool to the other. Roisin was flicking through a magazine, whilst Yvonne sorted through the day's post. Karen was listening with half an ear to Cassie and Lauren's conversation, but she was mainly giving her brain a chance to relax. As she lay on her back, gently moving her arms to keep herself afloat, she could gradually feel the hurt and anger at Neil's deception draining out of her. She could get used to the surroundings of Yvonne's house, she realised, and that in itself was a mark of how much she'd changed over the last year. When had her metamorphosis begun, she wasn't sure. Was it when Fenner had raped her, or was it even further back, when she'd found his porn mag and Maxi's knickers, she didn't know. She'd been with no man since Ritchie, and that was over a year ago now. Yes, she knew that she was currently emotionally raw, both from the effects of the trial and her total undoing with Yvonne the night before. But in spite of all this, Karen thought she might for the first time in her life, be on the verge of being happy with what she had. Yes, she missed having someone to hold her at night, she missed that feeling of completeness that only waking up with someone could bring, but this was an emptiness she was learning to accept. She also thought that maybe the lack of sexual company didn't matter to her so much because she'd found such a good friend in Yvonne. Female friends weren't something she'd ever gone in for in a big way as a rule, but with Yvonne it was different. After Ritchie had been shot, her and Yvonne seemed to gravitate towards each other, both seeking the same level of reassurance with the knowledge that they were both terrible mothers. When she'd taken Yvonne for that drink, after visiting Ritchie, that had felt like the most normal thing Karen had done in a long time. Ever since Yvonne had been released, they'd kept up their friendship, even though Karen had fully expected Yvonne to totally forget her existence.
When she finally dragged herself out of the all too addictive water, Karen briefly dried herself off with a towel and spralled on one of the sunloungers. Taking a swig of the Scotch Yvonne had poured for her, she reflected that she couldn't possibly be in better surroundings. The sun beat down on her body, and she felt for the most part content.
"So, what was all that about in court this afternoon?" Asked Yvonne.
"Fenner clearly took the opportunity of telling the defense barrister all about the supposed fake allegation."
"So, what's Grayling got to do with this?"
"When I went to the police about Fenner last year, I naturally had to tell Neil about it. With two of his staff at opposite ends of a possible court case, he would have had a conflict of interest. So, a little while after this, he called me in to his office, saying that he'd spoken to someone in the CPS who had told him that they weren't going to take up the case. He managed to persuade me that it was in my best interest to drop the charge before the police did." Yvonne was looking very interested by this time.
"Is that what the judge wanted to see you about?" Yvonne asked.
"Yes, he wanted to know why the case hadn't been pursued. It turns out that Neil Grayling didn't speak to anyone in the CPS at all. The person he told me he had spoken to doesn't even exist."
"You what?"
"Yeah, I know. The judge is going to look in to it and find out exactly who Grayling did speak too. He had to have talked to someone to know that the case wasn't going to be taken up."
"The conniving little wanker," Was Yvonne's summing up of the situation.
"Quite."
"And I'll give you one guess why Grayling wanted you to drop the case against Fenner," Yvonne continued. "He wanted something to hold over Fenner so that Fenner would have to owe him one."
"Takes one to know one, Mum," Said Lauren affectionately. Yvonne playfully swatted at her with the mastercard bill that was lying on the table. Cassie, having heard part of the conversation, got out of the pool and walked towards them dripping water over Roisin's slowly tanning body as she passed.
"What's Fenner done now?" She asked. The sudden silence that greeted her question was deafening. "What've I said?" Asked Cassie, feeling like she'd walked in on a conversation not meant for her ears.
"Cass, I don't think you were meant to ask," Roisin pointed out quietly. Cassie blushed slightly.
"Sorry," She said, "Me and my big mouth." Karen broke the silence by asking,
"Can I borrow your shower?"
"Sure, said Yvonne. There's numerous bathrooms upstairs so take your pick." When Karen had gone upstairs, Yvonne said,
"It isn't my story to tell, Cassie."
"Yeah, I gathered that," Replied Cassie. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Said Yvonne quietly.
"Was it something he did to her?" Asked Roisin.
"That's obvious," Replied Cassie.
"This is Fenner we're talking about," put in lauren. "Mum, going on what the defense tried to ask her about in court, I'm assuming he raped her."
"Lauren, it isn't up to me to tell you this."
"He did, didn't he?" Persisted Cassie.
"Yes, he did. Now can we drop it?"
"God, poor Karen," murmured Roisin.
"Which is precisely why this doesn't get talked about," Said Yvonne, her voice growing firm. "Is that clear?" It needed none of them to verrify that it was.
When Karen reappeared some time later, Cassie privately thought that she looked almost overdressed.
"Are you okay?" Asked Yvonne quietly, thinking that Cassie's untimely question had possibly undone all the good work of the relaxing swim.
"I will be," Replied Karen. "I've got to check up on how Di and Sylvia are coping in my absence, so I'd better be off."
"I can think of better ways to finish off a bad day," Said Yvonne.
"The joys of being a wing governor I'm afraid. I'll see you tomorrow." When Karen had left, Yvonne went in to her kitchen and began chopping vegetables for a bolognaise.
"Are you two staying for tea?" She asked Cassie and Roisin.
"If you're cooking," Replied Cassie, "Definitely."
"Bloody cheek, Cassie Tyler," said Roisin in mock affrontedness. Then, turning to Yvonne she said, "This one lived out of the microwave or restaurants before she met me."
"Yeah, I bet she did."
"Can I do anything?" Asked Roisin.
"You can come and keep me company while lazy arse over there tops up her tan," Yvonne said, gesturing to Cassie who was undoing her bikini top with the clear intent of sunbathing topless.
"You don't mind?" she asked Yvonne over her shoulder.
"No," Said Yvonne, taking note of Lauren's brief appraising glance in Cassie's direction. "why do you think this garden is as enclosed as possible."
Once away from the prying ears of her nearest and dearest, Roisin asked,
"What happened with Karen and Fenner's really getting to you, isn't it?" Yvonne loathed the sound of Karen's and Fenner's names spoken together like that, but she tried not to show it.
"Yeah, a bit," She conceded. "I feel so useless. It happened over a year ago and she hasn't even begun to deal with it, and I haven't got a clue how to help her."
"When did she tell you about it?"
"Last night. I've known her as a friend since before I got out, and she couldn't tell me any of this until it was absolutely necessary. Does that make me a shit friend or what."
"Good god, Yvonne, give yourself a break will you. Telling anyone about such a painful thing is something we only ever do when we have too. It isn't something anyone usually does by choice."
"It totally did her in talking about it."
"That's hardly a surprise."
"But what the hell am I supposed to do? I've never seen Karen like that, not ever. She's always been the strong one, the together one, the one out of both of us who could deal with whatever life threw at her." Roisin smiled.
"Yvonne, will you listen to yourself for a minute. You've just given a perfect description of not just Karen, but you as well. You're both incredibly similar, you know."
"Yeah, right, one a screw, the other an ex-con, really similar."
"Yvonne, for once in your life, listen to me. You and Karen are probably two of the strongest women I've ever met. Much as I love Cassie, strong as steel is something she'll never be, no matter how much she makes out she is. But just because someone appears to be in total control of everything they do, doesn't mean they can't have weak points. We all have areas of our lives where we are incredibly vulnerable. Clearly what happened with Fenner is Karen's."
"I just don't know how I can get her through this."
"You can't," Said Roisin softly. "It's something only she can do. All you can do is to be there for her when she wants you, and not to crowd her when she doesn't. The fact that she opened up to you at all is a good sign. It proves she trusts you."
"Apart from some nameless copper, I'm the first person she's ever given details too."
"There you are, then. In the beginning, Cassie was there for me, as a friend, and I couldn't have done without her. Just do the same for Karen."
"Did this happen to you?" Asked Yvonne.
"Yeah," Replied Roisin. "Aiden occasionally took the Roman Catholic tradition of a husband's rights to the letter."
"I'm sorry," Said Yvonne, thinking that far too many men had a lot to answer for.
"That's how I know that Karen probably has mixed feelings about telling anyone about what happened to her. She'll feel like it was her fault, and she'll feel ashamed. The best thing you can do is to keep letting her know that she didn't deserve it and that you're there for her." Roisin moved forward and gave Yvonne a hug. "Just don't forget that as her friend, you might have to offload occasionally too."
"I hope you're not leading my mum astray," Came Lauren's voice from the doorway.
"I don't think your mother needs leading astray," Said Roisin going out in to the garden to see how Cassie's tan was doing.
"You all right?" Asked Lauren.
"Yeah," Replied Yvonne, a little shell-shocked from her conversation with Roisin. "There's something you should know. I made a threat to Fenner this morning that after his performance today I'm going to have to follow up on."
"so, that's why you went to court early?"
"Something like that. I told him that if he either laid another finger on Karen, or if he kept his promise to discredit Karen's evidence, I'd have him nailed."
"Shit, Mum!"
"I know, I know. But what was I supposed to do, sit back and do nothing?"
"No, I guess not. But I take it you don't want to end up back inside?"
"no, and if I've got anything to do with it you're not going there either."
"Okay, leave it with me and I'll see what we can do about that evil bastard."
"If he's a good little boy and tells the truth in court tomorrow, then maybe I'll think about leaving him alone. But if he doesn't keep to the deal, I want him out of the picture for good."