Bury Me Down by the River

I wasn't born in the morning, no
I must have been born in the night
I've done my load and I'll carry my load
And all I own is my life

I wasn't born to be lucky,
'cause luck had no future with me
I've done my wrong and I'll sing, sing, sing my song
and stand beneath the hanging tree

Bury me down by the river
Let all the towns people see
Their enemy's dead, let me lay, lay my head
Just put me down and set me free

Jaimie was never in a worse state. Since she did not get the right amount of sleep, for fear that her family would appear once more in her dreams. Consequently, her head would loll in class, her attention was often elsewhere, and to top things off, she was not eating. Her friends were getting extremely worried, and on many occasions could be seen forcing Jaimie to eat. But it wasn't enough. Because she lacked sleep and food, her studies suffered, which only fueled her friends' worry.
Soon however, a month had passed since the death of her family, and her aunt and uncle had arranged a funeral ceremony. She and Remus would be leaving the first Saturday of October and returning late the next day. So, on Friday night, Jaimie could be seen, thin and weary, preparing her mourning dress and shoes in her dormitory, watched by Lily on her four-poster, holding a plate with a larg chicken leg and three dinner rolls, as Jaimie had not appeared during dinner.
"Come on, eat Jaimie. You need it, your getting thinner and thinner. Eat." She forced the plate into Jaimie's hands, and looked so foreboding, that Jaimie was left with no choice but to eat it.
When she had chewed the last piece of chicken and ate the last morself of bread, she swallowed and said, "Lily, I'm fine really. I feel, great." She said, though this was a downright lie, and she knew that Lily knew too.
"You should go to sleep early tonight, too. You might feel tired." Lily suggested, looking away.
"I don't feel-" Jaimie started, but soon closed her mouth, as she felt her eyes droop and fatigue wash over her sleepless body. "Yeah I think you're right. I'll finish this tomorrow, I still have time." She yawned as she dropped the dress on top of her trunk, and fell right on top of her bed. Not bothering to dress into her night clothes, Jaimie fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Lily walked over to her dormant friend and waved a hand across her eyes, making sure she was not joking. Lily smiled and said, "Sorry, Jaimie, you need to sleep. You'll understand." Lily pulled the covers from under her best friend, and placed them over her, tucking in the ends. Silently, she finished the job which Jaimie had started and when she was done, went down to the common room to be with the boys.
Sirius, James, Remus and Peter all sat stiffly in the best chairs by the fire, James saving Lily a seat. When Lily appeared, Sirius immediately asked, "Well, did it work?"
"Yeah, I didn't expect her to eat all of it, but she did, and the Sleeping Draught worked." She said, sighing.
"Good. Poor girl. She's always out here at night. Why do you reckon?" James wondered aloud.
"Because, her parents are dead, you would probably be like that too." Remus said.
"I hate Voldemort." Lily said, suddenly.
Everyone murmured their agreement. Sirius sat quietly in his seat, staring pensively into the fire.
"Sirius, what's wrong?" Remus asked, noting his friend's unusually quiet behavior.
"I'm just thinking . . .," he said vaguely.
"Are you serious? Sirius, thinking? I think that's a first!" James said, genuinely amazed.
Lily gave James a reproving look before turning to Sirius, "About what?"
"Just things . . .," He said, just as indistinctly.
A group of giggling fourth year girls came by and eyed the boys coyly, and gave Lily a look of repulsion.
"What things are those?" James pressed when the girls had finally gone by.
"I think that Jaimie needs a pick me up." He said leaning over, propping his chin in his hands, his elbow on his upper thighs.
"What do you have in mind?" Lily asked, immediately interested.
"One that wouldn't involve any of you." He said, looking around.
"But I'm her best friend-" Lily began.
"Yes, and you've done enough for her as is, same for you Remus." He stopped Remus from uttering any words.
"Well, what exactly are you-" James said, but Sirius stood up at the exact same moment, and said firmly, "I'm going to bed."
The others watched as he went up the staircase to the boys' dormitory, without a word.
"I don't like it, whatever he's planning." Remus said.
"I think we should have a little faith in him. After all, he does care about Jaimie." James said, pointedly.
"Yeah, but how is it different than all his other girlfriends?" Lily asked, skeptically.
They all fell silent. There was a truth to what Lily said. Sirius was a very spur of the moment type of person, and he did have many girlfriends, all of whom never lasted this long. James was starting to realize what Lily and Remus was feeling.
"If he hurts her," Lily said, threateningly to the three other boys, "I'll curse you so badly, you'll have extra arms growing out of your-"
"We won't let Sirius do anything bad to her, I mean, your not the only one who cares about her." Remus said defensively.
"Whatever, I'm going to bed." She stood up and took Sirius' lead. James eyeing her as she left.
"What do you suppose they do in there?" James asked, as Lily's vivid red head disappeared up the stairs.
Remus shrugged, and picked up a book that sat on the table. James turned to Peter who was just as empty as usual. Without Sirius to talk to, James just sat on his armchair, thinking about what Lily said. Ever since the death of Jaimie's parents, more deaths had been reported. But while James' family nor Peter's had yet been murdered, he still could not shake the image of Jaimie when he had seen her in the Leaky Cauldron, or of the state she was currently in. He remembered the unhappy faces he had to pass when they were at Diagon Alley, and he suddenly felt more wide awake than he had his entire life.
It was a few minutes before the three boys decided to go to bed, James now understanding what it was like to be an adult and to have responsibilities for the first time.

The next day dawned bright and early. But for the first time in days, Jaimie felt clear of mind. Perhaps because she had spent a full night of sleep in a month, or because she had eaten her first full meal in a while. She sat in bed, and immediately noticed the dress hanging at the end of her four poster, and the shoes next to her trunk. She looked toward Lily's four poster, its hangings drawn around them, though she knew Lily was in there sleeping soundlessly. It was a nice gesture, and did not go unappreciated. Deciding to let Lily sleep more, since it was a Saturday, she got up and walked to the bathroom to clean up. From her trunk she pulled a pair of jeans and a tee shirt and walked out of the dormitory into the almost empty common room.
She pushed open the portrait of the Fat Lady and walked out into the brightly lit halls. She made her way through secret passages, and saw the large oak doors leading to the Great Hall, when she was stopped all of a sudden, by none other than Damion Malfoy. He had appeared right out of the corner, alone, barring Jaimie's way.
"Hello, well look who it is. Jaimie, I haven't seen you in a while. And what's this? Where's Black and that mudblood friend of yours." He twirled a lock of her hair in his fingers playfully.
"Don't call Lily a mudblood." Jaimie whispered menacingly, pulling her hair away from him.
"Oh, I'm sorry, did I make you mad?" He asked, taking a step closer to Jaimie, who backed away.
"What do you want Damion?" Jaimie asked, as Damion's eyes bore straight into her own.
"Nothing much, just to tell you that I know about Remus' monthly walks." His eyes glittered dangerously, and his smiled grew sadistically.
"What are you talking about?" Jaimie said, getting more frightened by the minute. Damion knew, he knew that Remus was a werewolf.
"You know what I'm talking about." He said, running his finger down the length of her nose, and under her chin, pulling up her face.
"No I don't." Jaimie said, defensively.
"Oh, I'm sure you do, but don't worry," He bent down to her ear and whispered, "I'll keep it a secret."
Jaimie pushed him away, "I don't know what you're talking about! Stay away from me!" She ran around him and straight into the Great Hall, where, thankfully there were plenty of people she could take safety with. She sat down near a group of third years who didn't even bother to look at her. Jaimie sat stiffly in her seat, painfully aware of Damion's eyes as he swept past her, but didn't stop to continue their little conversation.
Jaimie placed a few pieces of bacon and egg on her plate and began chewing on them slowly. He knows! She thought frantically. What am I going to do! What if he tells. Oh this is horrible.
When she was done eating, she looked over at the Slytherin table, to see if Damion was watching her. When she was sure he wasn't she ducked out of the table, and walked out of the Great Hall amid a group of giggling Ravenclaw sixth years, some of whom she knew.
As soon as the doors shut fast behind her, she quickened her pace to a run toward the quickest way to Gryffindor Tower. When she had muttered the password to the Fat Lady, whose portrait swung forward promptly, Jaimie nearly dived throught the hole and sprinted to the boys' staircase, and into Remus' dormitory. She was surprised to see that Remus was already awake, however in his pajamas.
Remus turned around when the door opened suddenly, and saw Jaimie panting heavily in the light. Surprised, and not to mention a little emberassed, he whispered just loudly enough for her to hear, "What are you doing here, Jaimie, you're not allowed in the boys' dormitory."
"Damion knows, Remus, he knows. He knows your-our-secret. What are we going to do? He can blackmail us or anything!" Jaimie said, hysterically.
"Wait, slow down . . . Damion knows what?"
"He knows about your lycanthropy."
Remus' look of concentration faded, and was replaced by a look of hopelessness. He was staring in the opposite wall, though his eyes weren't focuse at all. Jaimie was growing more and more worried the longer he looked like ths.
"Remus?" Jaimie said, tapping his shoulder.
This seemed to wake him up and he said, "How did you know he knew?"
"He just said 'I know about Remus' monthly walks.'" She said.
"That could mean anything." Remus said blankly.
"I know, but, it could also mean that he knows."
"Who knows?" Sirius had suddenly appeared out of his bed next to Remus', James jumping on Remus' bed, Peter watched from one of the posts on Remus' four poster.
Both Remus and Jaimie began to say something. Remus to tell them that Damion might know, and Jaimie dissuading them.
"Ok which one is it?" James asked, puzzled.
Remus and Jaimie looked at each other, Remus closed his eyes and motioned for Jaimie to talk. "Its nothing. Don't worry about it." She said.
"Ok . . . Jaimie, you know girl's aren't allowed in the boys' dormitory?" Said Peter.
"Shut up, Wormtail, she's welcome here anytime!" Sirius ordered.
"Thanks, Sirius, and yeah, I knew, but that hasn't stopped you guys from trying to sneak up into the girls' dormitories. Has it?" She said slyly, looking at the boys in turn.
"Well . . .," They all wheedled
"I didn't think so. I'll see you guys later." She said, walking out of the dormitory.
"Jaimie, wait!" Sirius jumped off his bed, and ran to Jaimie who was halfway out the door.
She turned around, and watched as Sirius jumped in front of her, and asked, "How are you? Are you okay, feeling any better?" He brushed a lock of hair away from her face.
"I'll be fine, Sirius, thanks for worrying about me." Jaimie gave him a smile so genuine and so innocent that Sirius found that he'd lost the words he was going to say.
But he recovered and said, "No problem, I was just wondering if you would like to meet me in the common room at one o'clock in the morning on Wednesday. I have a surprise for you."
"Sure, but why so late? Well not that I won't be up at that time."
"Its a surprise, just promise to meet me, okay?"
Jaimie nodded, and left promptly. When she shut the door, Remus immediately burst out, "Where are you taking her, so late at night?"
"Don't worry, Remus, I'll keep her safe, and I won't hurt her."
"Its not that, I don't want her to be caught out of bounds late at night. She doesn't need detention, and she's freaked out enough about Damion. Not to mention she's depressed since her parents are gone, she doesn't need your break-up with her to trouble her either." Remus said, protectively.
"Don't you think I know? I'm trying to get her to think about other things. And I know this may be hard to believe, but I really like her, and I want to see her if not happy, then normal again." Sirius returned, defensively.
"I'm just saying, be careful with her. She doesn't need anymore crap in her life."
"I know Remus, I know. Don't you think that I'd understand? What its like to lose your family? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, I never even had a family to begin with."
Remus looked at Sirius calculatingly, finally he softened his gaze and said bitterly, "Yeah, I know." He looked out the window to the grounds outside, where there were few people relaxing. He sighed, and dug out his clothes for the funeral.
At noon, Jaimie and Remus emerged from the dormitories, both carrying a small bag each, containing their clothes and things they would need for two nights away. The others waited quietly in the common room, and watched them as Professors McGonagall and Sprout, the Herbology teacher, accompanied them to the iron cast gates. Professor McGonagall looked them over and said, "Now you both will be taking the Knight Bus to Nottingham, am I right in assuming that that is where your house is Mr. Lupin?"
Remus nodded once. Promptly, Professor Sprout flung her right arm in the air, and large bang sounded from a point about twenty feet from them. Suddenly, a large, triple decker purple bus appeared out of the thin air, and stopped abruptly in front of them, a very close miss from the spot that Professor Sprout had once stood. The doors opened wide, and out came a boy, a few years older than Jaimie and Remus, saying, "Welcome to the Knight Bus-"
"Yeah, we know already, just stand aside please. Let these two through." Professore Sprout ushered Jaimie and Remus forward and onto the first deck of the bus, and seated them in two seats near the driver.
"That'll be eleven sickles each." The conductor said.
Remus handed the driver twenty-two sickles, much to the displeasure of Jaimie, and Professor McGonagall asked the driver to place them in priority. The driver reluctantly agreed and as soon as McGonagall and Sprout bid them farewell and left the bus, the driver kicked into movement, sending all the passengers and the seats back a couple of feet, Jaimie would've flown over the top of her armchair, had she not grabbed Remus, who had clung onto the window sill. Soon, they were speeding down Hogsmeade and into an unknown place. Lamp posts, trash bins and even houses and buildings jumped out of the way of the Knight Bus, as the driver didn't seem to have learned how to drive well.
Jaimie soon found that she was getting sick, and buried her face into her hands, trying not to look at the objects that would fly out of nowhere. Twice, the bus came to an abrupt stop, Jaimie being propelled forward to her feet. She wasn't sure she like the Knight Bus too much.
Finally, they had reached the gates to Remus' home, where, beyond it, stood a fairly large house, vines creeping up the face of it. Their house was very much far away from the next one, and behind it was a forest. Jaimie remembered well one instance when she had entered it at night. It was the night that Remus was bitten, the werewolf may very well still be living in that forest. Remus noticed Jaimie staring darkly at the woods, and nudged her elbow, breaking her reverie. She nodded, and instead busied herself by shouldering her bag, and getting out of the bus, thankful for that dreadul ride to be over.
Remus and Jaimie walked up to the Lupins' front door, and rasped on it three times. Promptly, the door was opened by the Lupins' house-elf, Mimi, who wore a shrunken baby's blanket like a toga.
"Master Remus, it is good to has you back, sir. Hello Miss Jaimie, you is expected as well." Mimi moved out of the way, and opened the door wider to let the two teenagers into the Lupins' living area. It was quite spacious, and their footsteps echoed on the marble floor.
They set down their bags where they stood, and Aunt Charlene appeared from the top of the stairs, in a black dress with matching hat and gloves, the checkered handkerchief clamped in her right hand.
"Remus, Jaimie you made it, was the trip alright?" She asked, walking slowly down the stairs.
"Hello, Mum." Remus muttered.
"Hi, Aunt Charlene."
"Come on, dears, into the den, the funeral'll be later at four, so we might want to to wait till then."
Aunt Charlene ushered them into the den, which was filled with vases of white roses, and pictures of Jaimie's Mum, Dad and sister all blinking solemnly down at the new come visitors. Uncle Alan was seen by a small table, laden with alcoholic beverages, drinking a small glass of amber liquid, that would sometimes sent sparks up into the air. He looked deathly pale, and lines creased his face. He had seemed much, much older than he had a month ago, worse than Jaimie even. Though Aunt Charlene made Jaimie's visage seem ten times worse.
"Jaimie, dear, have you been eating well? Have you been getting enough sleep? No I see you haven't, you've got bags under your eyes, dear, and you're so thin! Here, eat this." Aunt Charlene went into the kitchen, and came back with a plate of sandwiches. She handed the plate to Jaimie, who tried to refuse it kindly, but Aunt Charlene kept forcing it upon her, much like Lily had the night before, and ate the sandwich in tiny bites, as soon as she finished it, another sandwich appeared. Aunt Charlene looked expectantly at her, and Jaimie was obliged to eat again.
"How about you Remus, darling, do you want something from the kitchen?" She rounded on her son suddenly.
"No thanks, Mum. If I'm hungry, I'll get it myself." Remus said politely.
"Thank you, love. Now Jaimie, you eat all those sandwiches up. We need to fatten you up as much as possible, or you'll waste away."
Jaimie smiled at her aunt through a mouthful of sandwich. She tried to swallow, but found that she really couldn't take one more bite, and rushed to the kitchen, her mouth still filled to the last with sandwich. Aunt Charlene watched her go, misinterpreting Jaimie's rush to get the food out, than take it in.
"Good idea, dear, best to eat in front of a table." Aunt Charlene called.
Remus snickered into his hands, as the sound of spitting food could be heard from the kitchen. Aunt Charlene looked slightly alarmed, but did not get up to check on things. Finally, Jaimie emerged from the kitchen, red in the face, and dragging a napkin across her mouth. Her eyes were bloodshot, and her breathing was uneven.
"You alright dear?" Uncle Alan asked softly from across the room.
"Yes, Uncle Alan." Jaimie mumbled.
She returned to her seat, and waited in quiet for when the time came for them to leave.
Finally, after an uneventful hour, when the clock had struck a quarter 'til three, Uncle Alan ushered them out of the house and into a muggle car. Jaimie hoped inside her that it was a Ministry car, like the one that Uncle Alan had driven herself, Remus and Lily in to get to King's Cross and Platform nine and three-quarters. Apparently it wasn't, it didn't seem to have any magical attributes, and Jaimie and Remus quickly found themselves staring out the window at nothing in particular, with lack of something better to do.
At half past three, they finally made it through the black gates of the cemetary. They pulled into the parking lot of the church, they were the only ones there. Perhaps there were more, Jaimie thought, Or maybe its just us.
But her first thought was correct, because as the rest of the hour whiled itself away, more and more people came to give their regards and regrets to Jaimie, many were holding soggy handkerchiefs. Jaimie herself knew she couldn't cry anymore, she forced herself that she wouldn't. So she sat in the first pew, as many people came up to the caskets that bore the bodies of her mother, father and sister, all of whom, she was glad to see, did not have the look of surprise on their faces. Finally, when the oration begun, the priest said his word, and many others came up to the podium to praise her family. Jaimie herself didn't say anything, and no one pressured her to.
Finally, when the oration was done, the caskets were taken out to the church, where their plots were dug out. Jaimie walked out, holding onto the glassy, black coffin of her mother, looking determinedly straight ahead, painfully aware that people were watching her. The priest gave a last eulogy, before the caskets were buried, some people crying more hysterically than what was necessary. When their casekts were slowly lowered, Jaime felt a slight yearning to fling herself down with the coffins, and get buried alive, but instead threw a single, white rose into each of their coffins, a glistening tear escaping her dry eyes. She wiped away the tear ferverently. She walked to the edge of the rut, as she muttered silently to herself. "Good-bye Mum, Dad, Dominique. I love you all, rest in peace."
Remus walked up to her side, and took her hand, she looked at their linked hands, and then at Remus' face and said, "I'm ready to go." He smiled reassuringly at her, before she turned around and made a path among the many tear-stained faces of the crowd.
The white rose fluttered down the large pit, and landed with a flump on the coffin, its petals shattering all over the surface.



A/N: Thanks to those who reviewed once more. It really makes me feel better.