Okay, just to make a few things clear for a few of my reviews. I have based
my fic VERY loosely on the actual LOTR trilogy. The characters are there
but the timescale and many other things I have mixed up to my own
advantage. And I know Elimay is not an elvish name; it probably isn't even
a known name coz I made it up myself. I also know Saruman is dead in the
actual story... but not in mine! I made elimay able to defeat Legolas coz I
liked the idea of someone in this weird world that is remotely true to
middle earth, actually being able to defeat him and what better than that
person being a woman! I have made Legolas stronger than her but because of
her skill, she is better at swords than him.
I will taken into account your words of advice especially when you say I
need to develop her character more. Seeing as I have actually finished this
story (thou I have not posted it all) I might do a revised version or take
your advice on board for my next story.
Thank you!!! I really appreciate your views.
Feeling Wanted
She could see her sister and her mother crouched in the cell, their hands and feet tied together. The fear in their eyes was unmistakable and she could see Lissy shaking. Neither knew of Elimay's failure or that she had gone the way of her father. They had been snatched from their walk by the sea of Rhun by a group of Uruk-Hai, and brought all the way to Isengard. Elimay could feel the cold of the floor even through her leather travelling boots and the iciness of the air bit against her cheeks. She called out to her family but they could not hear her.
Suddenly the door opened and her master walked in. "This is your fault," he told her, looking down at the two crouching figures. "If you had only killed that damn prince, they would be okay."
"No!" Elimay cried, clenching her fists. "If you weren't so evil none of this would have ever happened."
Saruman's eyes blazed. "You do not talk to your master like that!" he shouted.
"You are not my master," she growled, drawing her daggers and moving towards her.
He laughed at her and shook his head at her. "I have something to show you that will change your mind. Come with me."
For some reason Elimay complied and let him lead her out of the cell and down the corridor to another room. He drew back the bolts and entered, Elimay behind him.
It took her a minute before she could see through the dimness to what he was showing her. Then she gasped and her hand flew to her mouth. There, lying motionless on the floor was Legolas. He was deadly white and the darkening colour of red stained his tunic.
"No!" she cried, running to him and kneeling down. She took his face in her hands and he felt so cold. "Legolas!" she shouted, trying to rouse him from his deep sleep.
"He can't hear you," Saruman said. "He is dead."
A scream of pained anguish escaped from her lips.
She sat bolt upright on her bedroll, her scream ringing through the night air. It penetrated the silence of the dark and immediately woke both Gandalf and Legolas. Both sat up to see what had happened and saw Elimay with her eyes squeezed shut, her breathing heavy.
Legolas got up from his bed and crouched down to her, putting his hand on her shoulder. "It was just a bad dream," he said.
Her eyes opened and looked at him, sighing with relief to see that he was alive. Gandalf lay back down when he saw Legolas handling the situation.
Legolas pushed her back down again and lay behind her, stroking her head soothing her back to sleep. He kissed her ear lightly and then pulled her against him, drawing his arm round her. She soon drifted back to sleep comforted by the warmth of his body.
She woke somewhat disorientated, and raised her head to see Gandalf still sleeping nearby. Her head felt groggy but there was a strange comforting warmth against her back. Turning to look behind her she saw with a jolt, Legolas sleeping against her, his arm draped over her waist and his head nestled in her neck. Then she remembered the nightmare she had had, and waking up screaming.
She sighed deeply and laid her head back down again. She blinked away sleep and just listened to the sound of breathing near her ear and the cry of the morning birdcall. The horses stood nearby, munching at the long grass and drinking from the river's water.
It was a while before she felt Legolas stir and then yawn widely. He pulled her closer and kissed the back of her neck lightly. She closed her eyes at the pleasure of it and pulled her hand over his, weaving their fingers together. His hand was warm against her stomach and she caressed his skin with her thumb, absently. She knew they would have to get up soon, but right now she was too comfortable to move.
She heard Gandalf rise and quietly get breakfast ready, thinking they were still asleep. They did not see the smile that graced his lips when he cast a glance at the two elves. He found it both amusing and heart warming that the prince had fallen in love with his assassin. The fact that amongst rivalry and evil, love could be found, made him realise that the world was not completely lost to the effects of the war.
They eventually rose and after breakfast continued on their journey, following the line of the river southwards. Two more days passed uneventfully, riding through Gladden Fields and then crossing a tributary of the river that ran towards the Misty Mountains. Legolas told her of Rivendell for she had never been there, and she was amazed to hear that Elrond's daughter Arwen had married Aragorn, a mortal human. She was touched to hear of such love but still thanked the Valar that both she and Legolas were immortal. She would not be able to stand it if she grew old while Legolas remained young.
Soon they were passing close by the boarders of Lorien and Elimay wished that they weren't in such a hurry so she could visit the beautiful forest again. She remembered the rivalry between Legolas and Haldir and smiled, finding the memories amusing.
They stayed the night on the riverside with the green of the forest just a few miles away, and Elimay found that she was comforted by its presence when she tried to get to sleep. Its song seemed to reach inside her mind and sooth her. She did not wake up again until light was beginning to show in the sky. She sat up, careful not to wake Legolas, and looked around the camp. There was something missing. She frowned wondering what it was and suddenly realised that Gandalf had disappeared. She frowned and stood up, searching the camp for him but found nothing. What if he was in trouble? No, he was a powerful wizard; he would be okay.
Legolas opened his eyes at the sound of footsteps and found that Elimay was no longer at his side. He raised his head and saw that the camp was empty, and immediately panicked. He jumped to his feet and looked round but sighed with relief when he spotted Elimay crouched by the riverside, her silhouette dark against the lightening sky. He could not see Gandalf but was not so worried, knowing he was more capable of looking after himself.
He knelt behind her and wrapped his arms round her, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Where's Gandalf?" he asked.
"I don't know," Elimay answered. She was watching the fish jumping out of the water and then disappearing again hardly leaving any trace. Their scales shone briefly when they jumped, as the moonlight caught them.
"We should get back to sleep; its not till morning," Legolas whispered, kissing her ear.
"I'll come in a minute," she told him, as he got to his feet. She just wanted to watch the beauty of the night for a while.
Feeling Wanted
She could see her sister and her mother crouched in the cell, their hands and feet tied together. The fear in their eyes was unmistakable and she could see Lissy shaking. Neither knew of Elimay's failure or that she had gone the way of her father. They had been snatched from their walk by the sea of Rhun by a group of Uruk-Hai, and brought all the way to Isengard. Elimay could feel the cold of the floor even through her leather travelling boots and the iciness of the air bit against her cheeks. She called out to her family but they could not hear her.
Suddenly the door opened and her master walked in. "This is your fault," he told her, looking down at the two crouching figures. "If you had only killed that damn prince, they would be okay."
"No!" Elimay cried, clenching her fists. "If you weren't so evil none of this would have ever happened."
Saruman's eyes blazed. "You do not talk to your master like that!" he shouted.
"You are not my master," she growled, drawing her daggers and moving towards her.
He laughed at her and shook his head at her. "I have something to show you that will change your mind. Come with me."
For some reason Elimay complied and let him lead her out of the cell and down the corridor to another room. He drew back the bolts and entered, Elimay behind him.
It took her a minute before she could see through the dimness to what he was showing her. Then she gasped and her hand flew to her mouth. There, lying motionless on the floor was Legolas. He was deadly white and the darkening colour of red stained his tunic.
"No!" she cried, running to him and kneeling down. She took his face in her hands and he felt so cold. "Legolas!" she shouted, trying to rouse him from his deep sleep.
"He can't hear you," Saruman said. "He is dead."
A scream of pained anguish escaped from her lips.
She sat bolt upright on her bedroll, her scream ringing through the night air. It penetrated the silence of the dark and immediately woke both Gandalf and Legolas. Both sat up to see what had happened and saw Elimay with her eyes squeezed shut, her breathing heavy.
Legolas got up from his bed and crouched down to her, putting his hand on her shoulder. "It was just a bad dream," he said.
Her eyes opened and looked at him, sighing with relief to see that he was alive. Gandalf lay back down when he saw Legolas handling the situation.
Legolas pushed her back down again and lay behind her, stroking her head soothing her back to sleep. He kissed her ear lightly and then pulled her against him, drawing his arm round her. She soon drifted back to sleep comforted by the warmth of his body.
She woke somewhat disorientated, and raised her head to see Gandalf still sleeping nearby. Her head felt groggy but there was a strange comforting warmth against her back. Turning to look behind her she saw with a jolt, Legolas sleeping against her, his arm draped over her waist and his head nestled in her neck. Then she remembered the nightmare she had had, and waking up screaming.
She sighed deeply and laid her head back down again. She blinked away sleep and just listened to the sound of breathing near her ear and the cry of the morning birdcall. The horses stood nearby, munching at the long grass and drinking from the river's water.
It was a while before she felt Legolas stir and then yawn widely. He pulled her closer and kissed the back of her neck lightly. She closed her eyes at the pleasure of it and pulled her hand over his, weaving their fingers together. His hand was warm against her stomach and she caressed his skin with her thumb, absently. She knew they would have to get up soon, but right now she was too comfortable to move.
She heard Gandalf rise and quietly get breakfast ready, thinking they were still asleep. They did not see the smile that graced his lips when he cast a glance at the two elves. He found it both amusing and heart warming that the prince had fallen in love with his assassin. The fact that amongst rivalry and evil, love could be found, made him realise that the world was not completely lost to the effects of the war.
They eventually rose and after breakfast continued on their journey, following the line of the river southwards. Two more days passed uneventfully, riding through Gladden Fields and then crossing a tributary of the river that ran towards the Misty Mountains. Legolas told her of Rivendell for she had never been there, and she was amazed to hear that Elrond's daughter Arwen had married Aragorn, a mortal human. She was touched to hear of such love but still thanked the Valar that both she and Legolas were immortal. She would not be able to stand it if she grew old while Legolas remained young.
Soon they were passing close by the boarders of Lorien and Elimay wished that they weren't in such a hurry so she could visit the beautiful forest again. She remembered the rivalry between Legolas and Haldir and smiled, finding the memories amusing.
They stayed the night on the riverside with the green of the forest just a few miles away, and Elimay found that she was comforted by its presence when she tried to get to sleep. Its song seemed to reach inside her mind and sooth her. She did not wake up again until light was beginning to show in the sky. She sat up, careful not to wake Legolas, and looked around the camp. There was something missing. She frowned wondering what it was and suddenly realised that Gandalf had disappeared. She frowned and stood up, searching the camp for him but found nothing. What if he was in trouble? No, he was a powerful wizard; he would be okay.
Legolas opened his eyes at the sound of footsteps and found that Elimay was no longer at his side. He raised his head and saw that the camp was empty, and immediately panicked. He jumped to his feet and looked round but sighed with relief when he spotted Elimay crouched by the riverside, her silhouette dark against the lightening sky. He could not see Gandalf but was not so worried, knowing he was more capable of looking after himself.
He knelt behind her and wrapped his arms round her, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Where's Gandalf?" he asked.
"I don't know," Elimay answered. She was watching the fish jumping out of the water and then disappearing again hardly leaving any trace. Their scales shone briefly when they jumped, as the moonlight caught them.
"We should get back to sleep; its not till morning," Legolas whispered, kissing her ear.
"I'll come in a minute," she told him, as he got to his feet. She just wanted to watch the beauty of the night for a while.