Haku: And all the little people sang Doot da doot da doot...
Y. Haku: What are you doing?
Haku: I've got a song in my head, okay?
Mokuba: Well sing something else.
Haku: And all the little monsters sang Doot da doot da doot....
Mokuba: Helpful...
DISCLAIMER:
Haha... that's really funny... that someone would actually think I owned Yu-Gi-Oh!
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MORE FAQ!
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See, the reason we put this chapter in and didn't tell you about it was to prove just how bad a book this is. You're probably looking for the chapter: Duelling and All it's merits, aren't you?
Well, here's where the authors got lazy and asked some people to send in questions. These brave people, risking getting publicly humiliated and ridiculed have sent in questions, that will be answered in much the same format as the previous FAQ and RGA chapter.
FAQ: (Submitted by Princess Krystal01) Why does my hikari not have any fashion sense?
RGA: depends by what you define as Fashion sense. I mean, if your Hikari dresses in turtleneck sweaters and bellbottom jeans, we can see where you're coming from. If, however, your Hikari merely dresses in a version that is of similar taste than yours, it's probably hereditary.
If your Hikari does have bad fashion sense, try dropping a few stubtle hints, say, moving some of their more fashionable clothes towards the front of their drawers and closets, or, if they are too fargone for such hints to be useful, get the fashion police upon their tiny rears.
Yami: Three words, Black, Silver, Belts. If your Hikari has these three things in their ensemble, they aren't fashion deprived at all, but it is you who is. If not, buy these things, and force your Hikari to wear them.
Skintight is good.
Bakura: That's coming from a pharaoh who used to wear more jewellery than even Malik over there? Look. Are you really going to take the Pharaoh's advice on this one, when it's clear that all Hikaris have bad fashion sense? My advice is: Put up with it. There is absolutely NOTHING you can do about this one. It's an inbred thing, where they'd rather wear woollen jumpers in the middle of a hot summer, than be caught DEAD without them.
I'm pretty sure it's a part of the whole 'innocence' thing, but a whole lot more Hikaris should wear red open cloaks that reveal their chests and little loincloths. If anything, they'd be a lot cooler in the summer months.
Mariku: I heard that, Bakura. But I highly agree with this question, WHY does the Hikari have such a bad fashion sense? Shouldn't they know by now that a lavender midriff top with an open midsection and gold chains says things about their gender preference?
And what's with all the jewellery and the hair? Honestly, does anyone's hair really need to be THAT long?
FAQ: (Submitted by Yami Bunny Meatball) I wonder *why* people write these horrendous "fanfictions" about yamis and hikaris...?
RGA: Because it's fun, and the true rabid fangirl has a deep desire to pair a main character of ANY anime up with a 'Mary-sue' version of themselves and snog the character's brains out. I have even seen a few males write their own characters into the story, just so they can snog the main character.
Also, the pairings system is a marvellous thing, especially the same sex pairings that have fangirls slobbering and cooing all over them. A writer of these strange and mysterious 'fanfictions' (Most of which actually have nothing to do with the cannon of the story and simply use the characters) will take the characters and put them in strange and, dare we say errotic, situations, for their wn perverted pleasure. ((Haku: Not pointing fingers of course. Y. Haku: -puts down finger that was pointing at Haku))
Yami: being the victim of many such 'fan-fictions, I don't understand it myself, but these people seem to get a sense of grim satisfaction out of seeing their favourite characters in situations that are less than believeable. I, myself (And I'm sure the other yamis have had similar experiences.) Have been a vampire, ignored my Hikari, been sent off to a magical school, and even been a pirate upon occasion.
Bakura: In much a similar fashion to Yami, excluding being a Pirate, I have been put in these strange fictions and placed in situations that I would rather not know about. The standard 'Thief kidnaps anzu or another female cast member, shags her brains out and falls in love' does get tiring after awhile. Still, the fanfictions are mildly interesting, if you can overlook the strange pairings that some people think up. Me and the Pharaoh! HONESTLY!
Mariku: People write these fanfictions to torture the cast members. It's as simple as that. It's their own brand of showing the world just how cruel they can be to their favourite characters. It's as simple as that.
FAQ: (Submitted by yami Thoughts) what if my hikari INSISTS on writing fanfiction?
RGA: Your Hikari insists? That does present a problem, now doesn't it? Hmm... the solution is to let them write it, but discourage them from using mary sues and cliché plots, hard though it is.
Try to think of a way to bend the plots to suit what your Hikari is trying to accomplish, and for godssake! DISCOURAGE THE USE OF MARY SUES WITH EVERYTHING YOU CAN MUSTER!!!
Yami: The above solution won't work you know, because of your hikari's secret weapon, remember it? That's the one, the puppy dog eyes. Try and resist with all your might, but there's really nothing you can do if your Hikari wants to write fanfiction. Try to discourage them, by all means, I'm just warning you that it won't work.
Bakura: My my, I never thought I'd see the day... Is the almighty Pharaoh giving up? Anyways, what the pharaoh said is true, and most Hikaris these days DO write fanfiction. Hell, I even caught Ryou writing a bit the other day. The thing is, it's the latest fad, and like all fads, it should pass. ((Haku: HELL NO! FANFICTION FOREVER!!!!))
Try to discourage the heavily errotic ones though, innocent children scour the internet and already have porn, hackers, drugs and alcohol blaring down at them from all angles...
Actually, disregard that last point entirely... an innocent child? In this day and age?
Mariku: Write some yourself, convieniently putting the death of your Hikari as the summary. Upon seeing that they are giving you bad ideas (after recovering from the initial shock,) Your Hikari will cease immediately. Once again, the simple solution is the best.
FAQ: (From Dragon Child.) What does RSPCH stand for?
RGA: Royal Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Hikaris.
Yami: Rotten Shaadi portrays a cool head. Hey! That sounds like a newspaper title...
Bakura: Really stupid Pharaoh and Child Hentai society... No, wait, that would need an 's' on the end... Hmmm... that's a hard one.
Mariku: Dammit! I know this one! Erm... Ratty... no... Righteous.... no... Oh damn! I can't remember!
That's it! aRrogance iS Possibly the Coolest attitude to Have.
RGA: Erm... you guys are TERRIBLE at that kind of stuff, you know.
FAQ: (Submitted by Crazyrabidfangurl01) Why will my short and squat hikari not let me come out of my soul room at school and around her family?
RGA: Because your short and sqiat Hikari is afraid of what you might do to her reputation, even though you may not affect it at all. She believes that because you are somewhat taller than her (I'm guessing) she needs you to stay in your soulroom until she gets a growth spurt at the very least.
Yami: Because she's afraid of you still, and is afraid of what her family and friends will think when they find out that she has a dead spirit of some description inside her. I went through much a similar thing when my Hikari first met me. He didn't let me come out around ANYONE!
Bakura: Because you don't beat her up enough I say! Let her feel the pain for not allowing you the free reign! Of course, if you want to hurt her, do it away from the prying eyes of the RSPCH, or they will come and arrest you. And then, when she does finally relinquish control over to you, make her pay by turning her friends into playing cards and game pieces! It's her fault after all!
Mariku: Wait for her to fall unconscious, then take control and never give it back! Send her to the shadow realm, and then torment her friends and family and show your rage! Steal her sibling's pocky! Destroy her friendships, then give her life back completely wrecked and watch joyfully as she tries to build it up once more from scratch.
FAQ: You STILL didn't answer my question!!!
RGA: Most likely, that's because it was a Hikari asking about their yami and will be put in living with yamis, you simpleton!
Yami: You mean I faled AGAIN? I might as well just go kill myself for the world is doomed if I fail! Wait... I'm a corporeal spirit...
Sometimes it sucks being dead.
Bakura: You got that right, Yami, now, let's see, here's 30 cents... CALL SOMEONE WHO CARES!
Mariku: Erm... that's nice. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some buildings to blow up... or something else equally as evil...
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Haku: -is tired- -looks at the clock- 1:00 AM!!! No wonder why! I'm sorry if this wasn't up to scratch... so tired...
Y. Haku: Hmm... It's her own fault for procrastinating so much.
Mokuba: -nods-
Haku: Okies, I'm behind deadline, so I won't be able to do review replies. Sorry! And you guys know I love you... right? Right?