Warning, Contains major character death and it's canon and this chapter is a rewrite.
Disclamier: All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto. No copyright infringement intended.
CHAPTER 1
He longed for Konoha everyday, he longed for his comrades, the training grounds, the guidance of the third hokage, he longed for his little brother.
But Uchiha Itachi has a mission, and Konoha is scared of him. His former comrades thinks of him as a rogue ninja. The third hokage is dead, and his little brother is not so little anymore. Sasuke would definitely try to kill him, if he could try.
Go on, I've been waiting..
Deep inside He's still a Konoha Shinobi, loyal to his village and his people. His will of fire will never fade, even after joining the Akatsuki. He still does what he can to help Konoha. He proved it when he all but delayed the capture of the kyuubi, he couldn't let the Akatsuki get its hands on the nine tails.
So when he came across a Konoha kunoichi he did what the old Itachi would do, he took her with him. He landed with a thud and across him was his partner.
"Ah, Itachi-san. I see you've got company. A woman eh?" Hoshigaki Kisame was seated on the floor, his broad back against the wall.
"Hai." He can't have Kisame become suspicious of his actions.
"Eh! So you are a man after all, even a monster needs the warmth only a woman can give." Kisame smirked, his sharp teeth gleaming. He did not like where the conversation was going but he knew well than argue.
"I should be on my way now, give you a little privacy I guess. You do own this place." He laughed and looked at the girl on his shoulders with lecherous eyes. Then went on his way.
"All these jinchuuriki are tiring me, I'll see you when leader summons us again. Ja." He whined a little with his back turned and started walking away.
"Hn." It's a good thing that Kisame wasn't the nosy type.
When he was sure that no one was around, he put the girl down to his futon. She's younger than him, probably the age of his brother Sasuke. Her clothes were tattered and dirty, with dried blood and mud all mixed. He could've left her when he saw her lying on the ground unconscious, but he saw her hita itae. On her neck was the symbol of konohagakure, his land.
She's a hidden leaf ninja just like him, doing missions just like him.
He wouldn't deny that she's a pretty little thing, her hair was long and straight, with the color of the sky when it's dark. Her lashes were long and dark too, giving shadow to her tired eyes that was closed. Her mouth was small, and it had a tint of pink that was slowly fading. Her body was definitely a woman's. If he had not picked her up someone might have and that someone will notice what he is noticing now. A beauty like her won't go unnoticed, and vile men have a thing for the likes of her.
The night had passed unnoticed. He cleaned her the first day and healed her wounds. Ignoring the heat of his body every time he sees her body, sometimes his Sharingan would go spinning when he touches her. I am still a man.
She woke up the second night, and that was when he saw it. He thought he'd seen it all, but her eyes was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. It was ghost white, with the hint of lavender. And when she looked at him, he thought she saw his soul, naked and afraid.
"I, i can't see." Her voice was soft and light as a feather.
Reckless, she trusted him already. Him. A stranger. He wouldn't tell her but he was relieved to know she couldn't see him. Things would be easier that way. "You should go back to bed, I'll Fetch you some food." He turned and took a few steps.
"Wait! Ano, what is your name?" she asked him her eyes were wide as if trying to find his face.
"There is no need, you should rest." With that he left.
When he came back, he gave her food and she ate on her own while he was explaining how he found her. She was worried about her mission, it was her first solo mission and she failed. She said that Kiri wanted her eyes but she fought and killed that ninja from Kirigakure.
"I thought I died. Arigato for saving me." She bowed her head in his direction.
You don't know what dying feels like.
"It's nothing, you probably exhausted your eyes and drained your chakra so you should be able to see and go back to Konoha in a few days." People don't thank him, he doesn't save people, if only she knew who he was. She would probably go running blind.
"Hai! Ano, I wish I could know your name, I am Hyuuga Hinata."
"You don't have to, names are just names. I'll go now, please rest Hinata." He got up and left, his lungs are burning for a moment now, and breathing is getting harder by the minute.
He went to the bathroom and coughed into the sink. Blood. He was coughing blood a lot lately, that even his ruthless partner Kisame was getting worried.
He was slowly drowning, gasping for air but he kept a straight face whenever someone is around. But when he is alone, pain was evident on his face, his forehead was scrunched and his eyes are tightly shut while he's spilling his guts and blood on the sink.
I'm dying Sasuke..Are you strong enough now?Did you train well?Can you kill me now and be a hero?
His thoughts were everywhere, when he felt like he was about to collapse a soft hand steadied him. Her hands were soft not like any other shinobi with rough callused hands. Her hands were delicate like a flower, caring like his mother used to be, rubbing his back trying to ease his pain. And it didn't fail, after a few minutes his body calmed down and finally he could breathe. You're not taking care of yourself Itachi. He heard the voice of his mother.
"You are sick, very sick! I smelled blood, you were coughing blood? We need to get you to Konoha, I know someone who can heal you." She finally spoke, but her voice was still soft, she's still weak too.
"No" That's it. This woman needs to go as soon as possible.
"No! Come with me please, she's good she can heal anything. Please I beg you do not.." but she was cut off by Itachi.
"Kill myself? I know she's good, your Hokage is one of the legendary Sannin after all. But I don't need her help. I am counting on me dying soon. Go! I told you to rest didn't i? Tomorrow you'll go, I don't care if you're blind, I'll take you there myself. Now go!" He snapped, his voice was weak because of all the coughing fit. He saw her sniffed with her head down and her arms afront trying to find her way back to her futon.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. I didn't mean to make her cry. She was trying to help me damn it! People don't help me, they hate me! Why can't she? I'll tell her, I'll tell her who I am and see how she'll tremble.
He was so mad, but when he saw her sleeping he calmed down.
"Hinata.. I can not go with you back to Konoha." He saw her move on her bed and sat up to listen to what he has to say.
"I cannot go back to my village" Her small face twist in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"I am a Rogue ninja, I am on the bingo book, I am also part of the Akatsuki, you probably heard of me. I am Uchiha Itachi." He observed her reaction, and was greatly disappointed. She wasn't scared. Her face was calm.
"Now that I know your name, I want to thank you for saving me Itachi san." Then she smiled, a simple gesture that shook his legs and made him feel like an Anbu on his first Mission again, nervous and happy.
—
More days had passed and she didn't go back to konoha. He urged her, and even told her that he'd drag her there if she wouldn't. She only blushed and laughed at him, not the laughter of a bully, but the laughter of someone happy and giddy. That confused him, why would someone laugh at you when you're clearly threatening them?
A few more days and she regained her sight back. But still she didn't go back to Konoha. Hinata insisted that she could at least cook for them, sometimes he would bring home dangos. She cooked really well, sometimes he forgets that she's a ninja. Ninjas don't often know how to cook that well, instant foods like food pills are enough for him but it was a good change. Sometimes he thinks that kami must be giving him his last meal before he finally dies, so he brought him Hinata.
Hinata wouldn't question him about anything, Hinata was always soft spoken and her manners were of a hime. For a time he enjoyed the company she provided, it was different compared to all people he acquainted himself with. She wasn't afraid of him, she didn't ask questions, she didn't squeal in his sight like most girls, she smiles at him like he wasn't what he was supposed to be. But time was running out and he decided she really must go.
"I.. I want to take care of you." She said with her cheeks blushing and her eyes trying to look at him.
"You're sick and I can't leave you like this." She finished.
"I didn't asked you to repay me, I told you I don't need any healing or care. You have to go home, your family must be worried and your friends too. This is not your place Hinata." He tried to convince her. Or am I convincing myself that I don't need her?
" Itachi-san, you…. You are right. My Family and friends must be worried. I will go back to konoha…
"But in one condition." Her palms were sweating.
"Say it, i'll do it. Someone might see you here, it's not safe anymore. Kisame, my partner would go back here any day. What is it that you ask?" Yes, he almost forgot about kisame.
"Please Itachi-san, tell me." She slowly walked towards him, he didn't move a muscle. When she was in front of him he stared into her eyes, she knows! She knows I am more than I am presenting.
Slowly her hands rose up to touch both sides of his face and held him. She was small, and he could smell her skin. Lavender.
"Tell me who you really are" And without thinking his Sharingan went flaring, red as blood. Spinning madly at her lavender ones.
There standing on her bedroom. He showed her his life, through his eyes. Everything, when he was four and how he saw the gravity of despair a war can give, his time in the academy, the deaths of his comrades, sasuke being born, his family, his first love, the world of Anbu, Kakashi, Danzo, the elders, the third Hokage, he showed her all the times he spent with Shisui and how he died, how his clan grew impatient and arrogant, how the Hokage was losing hope, he showed her how he avoided Sasuke, he showed her he killed his brethren, and spared Sasuke, up until the time he joined the Akatsuki, he showed her all his pain, sadness and longing, he showed her how he cries when no one is around, how he prays when he thinks he can't go on anymore. He showed her all. Everything, nothing left, he showed her who he is.
Who Uchiha Itachi really is.
She gasped and he didn't noticed how he was also holding her face now. "Itachi, you suffered too much" And then she hugged him, tight and true.
Kisame was right, there is warmth that only a woman can give, a woman like her. He didn't care anymore and he hugged her back, he didn't notice how his tears fell from his blood red eyes but she did.
She looked at him and slowly wiped his tears away. And then she kissed him, a chaste kiss, just a peck. But how his world melted and until it was only her. He needed more, more than a kiss, more than a hug, he needed her, he needed Hinata, all of her.
I wanted her the first time I saw her smile.
When he kissed her, he thought she'd slap him off her and run. Run back to Konoha, but she didn't. Instead she wrapped her arms around his neck so she could reach him. He smirked through the kiss, she's so small and she tastes sweet.
He took a breath, and when he looked at her she was gasping for air too. Her hair was a beautiful mess and her cheeks were red. His Sharingan was spinning and remembering every single detail of this moment because he wants to remember it, to cherish it. Because he knows once this is over, there is no way he'll have it again. He'll die before that happens.
He kissed her again, now much more passionate and slow. He slowly push her back to her bed with him on top of her. Still kissing, her hands shaking at his shoulders.
"Hinata.." He hissed and kissed her jaw, her eyes were closed but her mouth was still half open, inviting. It's too painful for him now, everything was too hot. He took his shirt off and kissed her again, her shy hands were at his chest and the thought that he was going to be her first made his head spin. When he attempted to take her shirt off she stopped him gasping his name.
"itachi.." He looked at her slowly taking her shirt off leaving her only with her bra. She was well endowed like he always knew. But these was different she wasn't unconscious, she's awake and looking at him with half lidded eyes that are still shy.
He traced her ribs and to her back to touch the clasp of her bra all the while looking at her eyes. Honest and longing, waiting for her. When she touch his jaw he knew she wanted him too and it was okay. He took her bra off with ease and she held her hands in front of her ripe breasts in an attempt to hide but he took her arms to the side and looked at her, her waist was small but muscled, her breasts were untouched and beautifully staring at him.
"You're beautiful Hinata.." He whispered and kissed her again, his chest rubbing against her hard nipples, while his hands tried to cup one of them. He kissed her neck, while her hands were on his hair, his tie was loose and his strands were tickling her everywhere his head went.
When he kissed her between her breast, she was stuttering his name, when he licked one of her nipples she drew a sharp breath, and her hands were painfully pulling his hair. But he didn't care, he needed more. He took his pants off along with hers. She didn't protest, they both wanted this. He kissed her again while discarding the rest of his undergarments leaving him bare, freeing his painful erection. She felt it and her blush deepened realizing what's going to happen next, slowly Itachi took off her last piece of undergarment all the while they stared into each others eyes.
There is no turning back now, I deserve this. All the pain, all the weight of sorrow and lies. It will all fade away if I have her, even if it will only be once. Another memory to cherish in his cursed life. Soon enough he'll die anyway.
Arigato Hinata, for letting me show you who I really was, what I really felt. Arigato.
When he took her innocence, she cried and whimpered. She was in pain, Itachi painfully stayed still until she was ready to move. He was right afterall, she was pure. Her movements unsure, the sound of her voice embarrassed and shy, her breath shaking from all the sensations she was feeling because of him.
When he came after her, he collapsed on top of her. Their breath synced, bodies covered in sweat. His head between her neck and breast.
"Hinata..?" He spoke to her without looking.
"Hmm?" He felt the vibration of her voice in her chest, the beating of her heart loud and fast. But calm and not nervous or afraid.
"Arigato. For letting me show you who I really was." He told her, every word coming from his heart.
He felt her hands delicate and soft turn his face to look at her. She's beautiful, I could die right now and I wouldn't mind.
"People said that you're a heartless monster. People are afraid of you, people despise you for what you did. But I.. I know now that they are wrong and you.. you are capable of loving too. Just like everyone else. Maybe even more than anyone I know, that's who you are Itachi." Her words touched him more than anyone ever did.
Is she even real? Could a woman like Hinata exist? Maybe I am dreaming, maybe I'll stay here for a while and pray not to be awaken again. Right here in her arms, in her lavender eyes, where she won't judge me. And she would smile and laugh and tear up to silly things.
He kissed her and smiled, they slept embracing each other. Naked but not afraid. All false pretense gone.
Just for tonight, I will be selfish and then tomorrow everything will get back to way it used to be. Gomen hinata, you do not deserve a man like me.
That night, both of them drifted into the best slumber of their life. Hinata letting go of her fears and Itachi letting go of his past.
—
Hinata woke up with a smile, she's always been beautiful but a different bloom is now etching her face. But when she got a good view of her surroundings she wondered if she had been dreaming all this time.
She knew this place like the back of her hand. The white walls, the sterile smell of air. She's in the Konoha hospital, she's back in konoha.
She clutched her hands in her chest, her body is sore so it was not a dream. Itachi was not a dream. It was real.
"I trust you with my secrets Hinata, but gomen. You don't belong here, you belong in Konoha with your family and friends. I still have things to finish, soon you'll find a suitable man too, a man not like me. Gomen" Itachi's words echoed thru her head.
Now she remembers everything, Itachi must've brought her back home. But she wasn't sure if this place was still home, is it?
A knock came and she saw the Hokage herself striding inside, on her back was her father and her teammates along with her Niisan, Neji.
"Hinata! You're awake now!" Everything happened so fast, before she knew it Kiba and Akamaru was already on her bed. Kiba was hugging her while Akamaru licked her face and barked back at his master. Hinata smiled, it is home. But anyone can have two homes.
Neji only smiled and her father too was showing emotions. The Hokage too seemed relieved that she's alive and wasn't missing limbs or worse her eyes.
"Hinata, I need you to report about your mission. Submit it tomorrow." Tsunade's voice was stern.
"Hai Tsunade sama." She bowed, and the Hokage smiled and went off with her father.
"Ano, what happened to me? How did I get here? I couldn't remember Neji-niisan." She asked Neji, afraid of what answer he might give. Maybe Itachi left her at the gates or somewhere.
"You were found unconscious a few meters from the gates of Konoha, a few genins and a jounin returning from mission found you Hinata-sama. What happened Hinata sama? You were gone for too long we thought we'd lost you." Neji held her hand and squeezed it, he almost seemed mad.
"I didn't think for one day that you're gone Hinata chan, I knew you'd come back." Kiba grinned beside her, his fangs showing. Akamaru barked in agreement.
"It was only a matter of time, but waiting for you was painful. We were still worried, because you are our comrade, our teammate." Shino added his hands inside his pockets and his face hidden by his parka and shades, but she knew him. Shino always talks with sense, and honesty is one of his best traits.
Hinata lowered her head and touched Akamaru's head.
"Gomenasai, for making all of you worried. I'm fine, and soon I'll be taking missions again. Please don't worry about me."
They all filled her room with laughter, or Kibas laughter. Neji brought her food, and Shino brought her butterflies. They always treated her like a sister. And a child as well, if only they knew.
Night came and she was alone again.
Father would be furious once he finds out that someone had deflowered her, and that someone is a rogue ninja whom she cannot marry. What will her future husband say? Whoever he is he will surely be disappointed.
But did she regret it? Did she regret giving herself to Itachi? Not one bit.
—
Rain was falling hard, leaving him cold to the bone. He has sealed Orochimaru, freeing Sasuke from the curse mark.
He smiled inside, this is how I die.
Stepping closer to Sasuke, whose shaking in fear now. He could feel his lungs burning, he coughed more blood.
I am almost there.
With his Susanoo gone, and Sasuke wide eyed in front of him. There was nowhere for him to go, he felt bad for his brother.
To think that my own brother would be afraid of me.
"Forgive me Sasuke, this is it." He smiled, he's almost forgotten how to smile, but a month ago a gentle woman named Hinata reminded him how.
He flicked Sasuke's forehead and stumbled to the ground with a loud thud.
Hinata, gomen too. Itachi saw the sky, almost dark as Hinata's hair and the rain falling to his face reminded him of her soft touch. He felt the last beat of his heart and let go.