A/n I do not own labyrinth, David Bowie, etc., etc. And in case you don't
know some of the things, like Hobo Joe or Pufnstuf or an anteater, ferret,
anteater, etc. etc. go to 'cuz I have a page
just for you people! Plus there's fun stuff. So go there.
"Argh!" Hobo-Joe shrank back, noticing Pufnstuf's googly eyes.
"Pufnstuf!" Sarah gratefully hugged the green beast.
"Smell!" moaned Pufnstuf, tears pouring down his cheeks.
Sarah gasped, and then she held her breath.
There was only one bridge across the foul-smelling bog. A gallant anteater named Sir George, and his faithful steed, a ferret called Fred guarded it.
"I am sworn to do my duty," Sir George told them. "Without my permission, no one may cross this bridge."
"Oh, please!" Sarah begged. "I've got so little time left. I must find Lennie!" She stepped towards the bridge, but Sir George stopped her, brandishing a carrot.
Pufnstuf jumped up to defend Sarah, and a battle began. Pufnstuf had size and strength on his side, but Sir George was courageous and determined. He also had one great advantage-he didn't seem to notice the smell.
The duel ended in a draw.
When the fighting was over and Pufnstuf and Sir George had shaken hands, Sarah approached the little anteater once more.
"What exactly have you sworn?" she asked him.
"I have sworn with my life blud," Sir George replied, bowing deeply, "that no one shall pass this way without my permission."
"Well then," Sarah asked politely, holding her nose, "may we have your permission?"
The gallant Sir George turned Sarah's question around and examined it from all angles. He could see no flaw in it.
"Yes," he finally said. He bowed low again, kissing Sarah's hand. "And I, Sir George, will join your courageous band."
Sarah now had three companions to aid her on the journey. T hey was called the Fellowship of the Corn Maze A-Doom!
Sarah had just stepped onto the creaking, groaning bridge to a triumphant musical number playing mysteriously in the background, when it collapsed and sank slowly into the piles of manure.
"Oh no!" She gasped. "How will I get across now?"
"There in no other way, milady." Sir George told her, shaking his head.
At that moment, Pufnstuf sat down on the bank and began to howl.
Sir George turned in amazement. "My brother!" He said. "Are you the manly knight I fought just now? How can you sit by and howl when your maiden needs our help?"
Pufnstuf kept howling. As the astonished Sir George watched, a giant orange rose up out of the Manure Field to answer Pufnstuf's cry. More oranges joined it, becoming a bridge of stepping-oranges that led to the opposite bank.
"Oranges...friends," Pufnstuf said sweetly.
Sarah, Hobo-Joe and Sir George moved quickly through a deep, dappled forest. There were only three hours left. They were tired and very hungry.
Hobo-Joe found himself holding out Billy Bob's special cornbread. "Here" he said to Sarah through clenched teeth.
Sarah accepted the bread gratefully. But when she took her first bite, she realized that it was "special".
"Hobo-Joe," she said. "Oh, Hobo-Joe. What have you done to me?"
Hobo-Joe's eyes filled with tears. He turned and ran back into the forest, hating himself and Billy Bob in equal measure.
Then Sarah forgot everything-Hobo-Joe, Pufnstuf, Sir George, even Lennie. T here were bubbles floating above her, glittering bubbles that seemed to beckon to here to some enchanted place. She followed them.
The bubbles took Sarah to a glass barn-house with a hoedown going on. Dancers whirled across the floor. In the center of it all, watching her was Billy Bob.
He took her in his arms and tried singing a song of love to her, but every time he tried, a rousing chorus of "Molly on the Shore" interrupted him so he gave up.
"Give up this foolish quest," he whispered, t rying to be sultry and sexy. Hey, he HAD changed spandex overalls for the seventh time that day AND combed his mullet. The music washed over her as he spun her around in dizzying circles.
She felt herself giving in to his masculine charms. Then, somehow, she thought of Lennie.
"No!" she gasped. In an instant, the glass barn-house and everything in it crumbled into dust.
"Argh!" Hobo-Joe shrank back, noticing Pufnstuf's googly eyes.
"Pufnstuf!" Sarah gratefully hugged the green beast.
"Smell!" moaned Pufnstuf, tears pouring down his cheeks.
Sarah gasped, and then she held her breath.
There was only one bridge across the foul-smelling bog. A gallant anteater named Sir George, and his faithful steed, a ferret called Fred guarded it.
"I am sworn to do my duty," Sir George told them. "Without my permission, no one may cross this bridge."
"Oh, please!" Sarah begged. "I've got so little time left. I must find Lennie!" She stepped towards the bridge, but Sir George stopped her, brandishing a carrot.
Pufnstuf jumped up to defend Sarah, and a battle began. Pufnstuf had size and strength on his side, but Sir George was courageous and determined. He also had one great advantage-he didn't seem to notice the smell.
The duel ended in a draw.
When the fighting was over and Pufnstuf and Sir George had shaken hands, Sarah approached the little anteater once more.
"What exactly have you sworn?" she asked him.
"I have sworn with my life blud," Sir George replied, bowing deeply, "that no one shall pass this way without my permission."
"Well then," Sarah asked politely, holding her nose, "may we have your permission?"
The gallant Sir George turned Sarah's question around and examined it from all angles. He could see no flaw in it.
"Yes," he finally said. He bowed low again, kissing Sarah's hand. "And I, Sir George, will join your courageous band."
Sarah now had three companions to aid her on the journey. T hey was called the Fellowship of the Corn Maze A-Doom!
Sarah had just stepped onto the creaking, groaning bridge to a triumphant musical number playing mysteriously in the background, when it collapsed and sank slowly into the piles of manure.
"Oh no!" She gasped. "How will I get across now?"
"There in no other way, milady." Sir George told her, shaking his head.
At that moment, Pufnstuf sat down on the bank and began to howl.
Sir George turned in amazement. "My brother!" He said. "Are you the manly knight I fought just now? How can you sit by and howl when your maiden needs our help?"
Pufnstuf kept howling. As the astonished Sir George watched, a giant orange rose up out of the Manure Field to answer Pufnstuf's cry. More oranges joined it, becoming a bridge of stepping-oranges that led to the opposite bank.
"Oranges...friends," Pufnstuf said sweetly.
Sarah, Hobo-Joe and Sir George moved quickly through a deep, dappled forest. There were only three hours left. They were tired and very hungry.
Hobo-Joe found himself holding out Billy Bob's special cornbread. "Here" he said to Sarah through clenched teeth.
Sarah accepted the bread gratefully. But when she took her first bite, she realized that it was "special".
"Hobo-Joe," she said. "Oh, Hobo-Joe. What have you done to me?"
Hobo-Joe's eyes filled with tears. He turned and ran back into the forest, hating himself and Billy Bob in equal measure.
Then Sarah forgot everything-Hobo-Joe, Pufnstuf, Sir George, even Lennie. T here were bubbles floating above her, glittering bubbles that seemed to beckon to here to some enchanted place. She followed them.
The bubbles took Sarah to a glass barn-house with a hoedown going on. Dancers whirled across the floor. In the center of it all, watching her was Billy Bob.
He took her in his arms and tried singing a song of love to her, but every time he tried, a rousing chorus of "Molly on the Shore" interrupted him so he gave up.
"Give up this foolish quest," he whispered, t rying to be sultry and sexy. Hey, he HAD changed spandex overalls for the seventh time that day AND combed his mullet. The music washed over her as he spun her around in dizzying circles.
She felt herself giving in to his masculine charms. Then, somehow, she thought of Lennie.
"No!" she gasped. In an instant, the glass barn-house and everything in it crumbled into dust.