Chapter 4
The Group of the Fairy
Lil B: At this time, I would like to thank my sister, Bunny Hooded Bombchu, for editing all my chapters! Read her stuff cuz she's WAY better then me! Wait...BHB!!! YOU MESSED UP THE SCRIPT!!!
BHB: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
Lil B: Well she does get some credit, since she wrote most of the Council part. If you like the council, then try reading her stuff.
BHB: Aw, thanks Lil B! But I couldn't have done it without-
Lil B: Shut up! Its time for the fic!
CAST:
Link = Frodo
Little Link (LL) = Sam
Rauru = Bilbo
Darunia = Gandalf
Ganon's eye = Sauron
Ganondorf = Sarumon
Tatl = Merry
Tael = Pippin
Deku Tree = Treebeard
Nabooru = Aragorn
Ruto= Legolas
Saria = Gimli
Stalfos = Orcs
Skullkid = GollumSmeagol
Mido= Borimir
Tingle= Farimir
Redead = Ringwraith
Hot Elf Dude (hed) =Arwen
Gay Woman Person (gwp)= Eowyn
Guru Guru(GG) = Elrond
Carpenter Dude (cd) = Theoden
Kapora Gabora (kg) = Lord of the Eagles
Darunia: Link... Link... FOOL OF A HYLIAN, WAAAKE UUUUUP!!!!
Link: Huh... oh Darunia. Welcome. Would you like some tea? (comes to his senses) I WAS STABBED BY A REDEAD!!! And why didn't you meet us?
Darunia: I was preoccupied....
FLASH BACK flash back FlAsH bAcK... On top of Ganondorf's tower.
Ganondorf: Die communist!
Suddenly a squirrel runs up to Darunia and takes out a chainsaw.
Darunia: (to squirrel) mutter mutter (hears owl hoot) (to Ganondorf) Not today, loser!
Jumps of tower and lands on Kapora Gabora, but his awesome weight sends them crashing to the ground.
Darunia:(running away) AND I'M NOT A COMMUNIST!!!
Present time...
Link: Ohhh............................... hey! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LET LOOSE THAT SQUIRREL!!??
Darunia: Um...uh...AMNISIA DUST!! (throws talcum powder in links eyes)
Link: Talcum powder??
Later...
Guru Guru: Welcome to the council of Elrond.
Darunia: What about the council of Guru Guru?
Guru Guru: Did I stutter?
Darunia: No but-
Guru Guru: Then shut up!!! Link!! Bring forth the ring!!
Link: Don't you mean Fairy?
Guru Guru: SHUT UP OR I'LL BURN ALL OF YOU!!!!
Link brings the fairy over. It's in a bottle and you can hear muffled screaming from inside.
Mido: Hmm...ITS A GIFT! A gift to the foes of Death Mountain and surrounding areas!!
Darunia: Which just so HAPPENS to be my home.
Nabooru: AND no one can wield it unless you're evil!!
Mido: But I AM evil!! Your stupid!
Ruto: Don't insult her! Shes Nabooru, daughter of....um.....yeah. Anyways, she's the heir of Gerudo Valley!!
All: GASP!!!!!
BUM BUM BUM....
Mido: But Twinrova is the Steward! And either me or Tingle will take her place!! WE DON'T NEED NABOORU!!!!
Nabooru: I turned from that path long ago. Live with it!
Darunia: The only way to go, is to destroy it! That means to throw the fairy into Death Mountain!
Guru Guru: Throw it in! Throw it in! Throw the stupid fairy in! And then when you do! We'll bow down to you!!
Link: Won't it just fly away if we throw it??
Mido: Hold her down. I'll cut off her wings!!
All: YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
Darunia: Violence is not the answer......WE'LL BURN THE WINGS OFF!!!!!!
All: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!
Navi: I OBJECT!!
Guru Guru: OVER RULED!! I SENTENCE YOU TO BURNINATION!! Who will hold her down?
All: ........(crickets chirp)
Guru Guru: OK! Who will take her to Death Mountain?
All Except Link: OOH!! I WILL!!!!!
All start fighting.
Link: I'LL DO IT!!!!!!!!!
Darunia: I'll help you to bear this burden. Since your gonna die, anyway.
LL: I'M COMING TOO!!!!
Tatl and Tael: AND US!!!
Link: Whatever.
Saria: Well, you've got my mace.
Nabooru: And my sword
Ruto: And my fin!
Nabooru: No seriously, give us back our stuff.
Link: No, never, its not what you think! (Runs away)
Later
Guru Guru:(thinking) They acctually think they can succeed, but I know the truth!
Link: No! Wait! LL, we are not bringing beer
Guru Guru: (Thinking) They think I'm crazy, but I'm not crazy! I'M THE ONLY ONE THATS NOT CRAZY!!!
Saria: Do we have everything?
Tail: I think so...
Guru Guru: EAT BABIES!!!
All stare at Guru Guru.
Guru Guru: You saw nothing! (throws powder at them) Amnesia dust!
Runs away.
Link: Talcum powder? Again??
Later
Mido:(Thinking) That fairy looks really shiny!
Long silence
Tatl and Tael suddenly burst into song.
Tatl and Tael: I like to oot, oot, oot, ooples and banoonoos! I like to eat, eat, eat, eeples and baneenees! I like to ate, ate, a-
All except Tatl and Tael: SHUT UP ALREADY!!!
Long silence.
Mido: So... um, anyone here see the game last night?
Saria: Oh yeah... Nice weather huh?
Darunia:Oh yes, very nice... yeeeaaaahhh.
LL: No longer drunk, I will continue my obssesion with bagpipes and all their glory!
Link: Oh no, you didn't!
LL: Yes I did!
Takes out bagpipes
Link: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?!
Later
Darunia: Mountains!
Saria: Mines!
Darunia: Mountains!
Saria:MINES!
Darunia: MOUNTAINS!
Both start fighting
Link: I like mines!
Darunia: In yo face!
Later
Darunia: There is a riddle on the door! "What is the best thing in the world?"
Mido: I know this one! Uuuuhhh.... pengiun... legs...
Door starts to open.
All: YAY!
Later
Darunia: I have no memory of this place...
LL hits him on the head with a frying pan.
Darunia: Oh! Its that way!
Lil B: What will happen next? I don't know... maybe I'll just leave you hanging at the best part! Well any way we all know whats gonna happen to Darunia! Watch out for chapter 5!!! OR ELSE... Fedex!
