Comedy Tomorrow, Catastrophe Tonight - Sailor Moon Super R Episode 5

Scene One

Zoerat stands in the sewer in front of a pipe pouring water. "Jedrat, I'm almost out of patience with you. Tell me that you have a plan to help raise our energy levels, not lower them."

"Yes, Lord Zoerat. I have found that the foolish humans expend an unbelievable amount of energy in an activity called acting. And, as luck would have it, there is a center for that activity just one block down."

"Excellent! If this new project is a success, you will have great honor."

"Yes!"

"But, Jedrat, it must not fail. Or, else."

Jedrat looks chilled to the bone by Zoerat's deadpan threat.

Scene Two

Tenchi sweeps the inside of the Hino shrine. Rei approaches from behind.

"Tenchi, what's wrong?"

Tenchi fails over. "Rei. You startled me."

"Come on Tenchi, I know something is worrying you. I haven't seen you smile once today."

"Well, it's my friend Kenta. I owe him a favor, so I told him I would take over his drama class project, a two act play."

"Good for you Tenchi! Is it going to be hard?"

"Impossible. His script isn't usable." Tenchi bows his head.

"Maybe I can get my friends to help out?"

"Gee, Rei, that would be great!" Tenchi then mumbles under his breath "I think."

Scene Three

Sasami opens the storage closet. "Washu, it's a phone call from Lord Tenchi!"

Washu materializes through the doorway. "Thanks, Sasami."

Washu grabs the phone. "Hello Lord Tenchi."

"Little Washu, I think I'm in trouble."

"Why's that?"

"I think Rei is trying to pry too far into my business. And, I agreed to let her and her friends help produce a play for me."

"Tenchi, anything that you need, and I mean just about anything, just ask the universe's greatest mad scientist, Little Washu!"

Scene Four

Serina addresses her friends around the low table in the guest room at the Hino Shrine. "So, you've all had a chance to read my script. What do you think?"

Ami smiles. "Serina, I was very surprised you wrote all of this in one night."

Luna pops her head out of her basket. "I was even more shocked. I have never seen Serina work so hard before."

Serina remains calm. "Guys, I want to be a manga artist one day, I view this as proof I have what it takes to write original stories."

The other girls get sweat drops.

Mina sits up. "Serina, I liked the story a lot. It was romantic, and it had a happy ending where the girl wins her long lost love."

Serina beams. "Thanks, Mina!"

Rei frowns. "I just have one question, 'Meatball Head'. This main character, Sericity, who wins the heart of some cute guy that she was offered to in an arranged marriage five years ago, she's not based on some one we know, is it?"

Serina starts fuming. "Rei!!"

Lita slaps her hand on the table. "Guys! Who cares? It's a good script, and it's one that can be produced."

Rei fumes. "Lita, did you see how bad she made the Temple Maiden character?"

Serina touches her index fingers together. "Just trying to make it easy for you to play."

A voice is heard from the door. "Is anyone in there?"

Rei snaps back to a smile. "Tenchi! Come in!"

"Hello girls! Serina, I loved the script! But, there's very little time. We have until tomorrow to pull it all together."

Serina's head slumps. "Yeah. Almost no time at all."

"But, you girls will in act in it, right?"

The girls nod their heads.

"Okay, show up at that theater near my house tomorrow at 2 PM and we'll rehearse."

"Right!" The girls throw their fists up in the air.

Scene Five

Serina runs down a hallway to an open door. Rei stands in the doorway.

"Sorry I'm late." Serina says panting.

"Serina, it's no big deal, you're only ten minutes late." Rei sounds artificially sweet to Serina.

"Rei, thanks for not giving me a hard time." Serina sounds puzzled.

Rei smiles slyly. "Oh, those are Tenchi's casting decisions." Rei points at the opened door.

Serina looks at the sheet of paper taped to the door. She does a double take.

"Why does Minako have the lead?" Serina sounds like she's in shock.

"Because we all felt that she was best for the part."

"But she'll get to kiss Tenchi!" Serina tries to regain her composure. "So, why didn't you lobby for that part, humm?"

"Because I work with him and it would be weird! Besides, Lita wanted to play the brainiac and Ami wanted to play the glamor girl. You weren't here so I recommended you for the evil shrine maiden. Snooze, you lose!"

Serina turns up her nose. "You guys are trying to make my play look bad because you're jealous."

Ami walks out with Luna on her shoulder. She wears cool looking sunglasses and has a red bow in her hair, just like Mina's usual bow. "Serina, this is going to be so much fun!"

Serina pouts. "Yeah, sure."

Luna gives Serina a look of disapproval. "Serina, I think it was a tremendous idea for the girls to switch parts. Who knows? Maybe we will have a chance to use this exercise as part of Scout business."

Ami hands Serina a piece of paper. "Serina, could you run these lighting cues up to the tech booth? Then, you'll need to get into costume."

"Okay." Serina sighs with resignation.

Scene Six

Mina stands in a small rehearsal room. "Tenchi, I'm so happy I'm playing the lead. But, I don't want you to think that I wanted the part just so I could kiss you. I hope to be a great actress someday so I just wanted the challenge of being the lead." Minako looks slightly silly with her hair done up in grommets.

Tenchi laughs. "Mina chan, I wouldn't worry about that, there's been a casting change."

Mina looks crushed.

Tenchi realizes his error. "No, no. You still have the lead. It's just that, well, I have stage fright and Kenta was feeling guilty, so he's now playing the lead role."

"Oh, so you must be Kenta?" Mina turns to the red headed person sitting next to Tenchi.

"Just call me 'little Kenta'!" Washu says in a exaggerated low voice. Washu makes a "V" sign with her fingers.

Mina is stunned by Washu's behavior. Artimus sticks his head out of his basket, also stunned.

"Oooh, Is that your cat?" Washu holds her wrists together at chest level and shakes them. "What's it's name?"

"His name is Artimus."

"It's sooooooo cute" Washu picks up Artimus.

Mina walks up to Tenchi and whispers: "Kenta is straight, right? Not that this would be bad, but it would help me if I know before I stage kiss him."

Tenchi bows his head. "I'm afraid Kenta is straight."

Scene Seven

Serina knocks on the tech booth door, which doesn't open.

"What do you want?" says a gruff male voice.

"I have the lighting cues."

"Slide them under the door, we're busy."

Serina slides the cues under the door. "Strange-oid people!" Serina mutters under her breath.

On the other side of the door Zoerat looks at Jedrat. Tentacles grow from the control board. Both of them smile.

Commercial Break

Scene Eight

"This is so exciting! We're going to see our daughter's first play!" Serina's mom beams as Serina's family get into their seats.

"Yeah, I just can't wait to see her screw things up."

"Rini, you shouldn't wish bad luck on your cousin." Serina's dad sounds stern.

"Okay." Rini says without conviction.

The lights dim. Ami comes out on stage trying to walk like a model. She tries to strike a chic looking pose with large fan. "Once upon a time there lived a handsome prince named Tenchers. His family raised him to be a humble man by having him work at a local shrine, but it was widely known that he was destined for greatness."

Washu comes out in a male shrine uniform and mimes sweeping.

At the Masaki shrine the rest of the girls crowd around the TV. Ayeka and Ryoko shove each other jockeying for position.

"Five years before, the King decided to offer the prince a poor peasant girl for a wife after hearing that this girl had the heart of a dozen men."

Mina comes on stage and dances in place.

"But the prince wanted to wait five years before making his decision so he could enjoy his youth without the pressure of his royal heritage."

Washu does a silly looking dance with the imaginary broom. This draws laughs from the crowd.

The Tenchi girls laugh in front of the TV. Kyonni looks stern. "We must study these girls, they might have something to do with the monsters."

Ami snaps her fan shut. "But he worked with an evil shrine maiden who didn't want Tenchers to be a prince, she just wanted him to be a shrine worker so she wouldn't have to work so hard."

Serina walks onstage wearing a shrine maiden's kimono and straight hair. She pokes Washu with her imaginary broom so Washu stops dancing and gets back to sweeping. Serina let's out a cackling laugh.

Ami sticks her finger in the air. "Then came a day when the king felt that the time was right so he sent out a decree stating that Tenchers and Sericity would be married the next day, but the evil shrine maiden had two of her study friends try to sabotage the wedding by not letting Tenchers know about it."

Rei comes on stage dribbling a volley ball accompanied by Lita who plays with a hand held computer. Serina mimes giving them diabolical instructions.

Ami leans forward. "The evil shrine maiden used her athletic friend to run around the kingdom and destroy all the announcements that had been hung up. The evil shrine maiden used her brainiac friend to erase all mention of the marriage from the TV and radio."

Mihoshi starts crying in front of the TV set. "That's so sad!"

Kyonni hits her.

"But the virtuous peasant girl Sericity found out about this plot and vowed to free Tenchers from the Shrine where the evil shrine maiden was almost holding him as a slave!"

Mina does a martial arts form and starts running in place.

"But, the evil shrine maiden sent her two henchmen after her."

Mina, Lita and Rei mime a battle.

Ayeka and Ryoko do a little cheerleader number with fans.

But in the middle of the battle the main lights go out. Jedrat and Zoerat laugh as the energy from the house is drained downwards.

Washu's spy bots hoover to the ground and fall asleep.

The audience starts passing out, as do the performers.

Rei realizes what's happening. Since she is in a clench with Mina, she whispers to Mina "Transform off stage." and then shoves Mina off stage with her last bit of strength.

Washu, seeing her bots fail to the ground rolls off stage, but can barely move.

"Venus Star Power!"

Sailor Venus strides out on stage and sees Jedrat and Zoerat in the tech booth in silhouette. "This theater is a place for dreams to be born and stars to develop. I'm not going to let you destroy these actors and fans just so you can steal their energy for the negaverse. I'm Sailor V for Venus and I will punish you!"

Zoerat is angry. "Jedrat, get her!"

Jedrat nods. He vanishes and appears on stage, transformed. He is now wearing a mask with the "sad" expression and holds a long shepherd's hook in his hands. "I'm sorry, you performance is not up to par. You're getting the hook!"

Jedrat swings at Sailor Venus who jumps out of the way. Jedrat keeps swinging, not letting Sailor Venus set up for her offense.

Washu, also offstage, materializes her control board and causes one of the spy bots to buzz past Jedrat to distract him.

"Venus Crescent V Smash!" Sailor V zaps Jedrat. The energy of the blast is partly drained but Jedrat is still wounded.

"No, no!" Jedrat swings wildly.

Zoerat, from the tech booth, frowns. "If they capture him, they'll be able to figure out where we are." Zoerat causes a ball of energy to appear in his hand and throws it at Jedrat. Jedrat reverts to moon dust.

Sailor Venus looks up to see Zoerat's silhouette fade away.

Scene Nine

Washu is in a bed. Sasami brings her a tray.

"Here you go Washu, some Miso soup. You'll feel better in no time."

"Thank you Sasami. Sasami, can you keep a secret?"

"Sure."

"Don't tell the others, and all this might be jumping the gun, and I still have to do some more research, but Tenchi might be in real danger!"

Closing Credits over "Washu's Lulaby"