Author's Note: Again, thank you to all of my loyal readers and reviewers. I certainly would not have a purpose for continuing my writing if not for all of you. Please, continue to enjoy. The chapter is up a little early this week, which is good. Go me! ^-^V
'' indicates thoughts or telepathy
//\\ indicates character from whose POV the story is told at the time
//Tsuzuki\\
As Muraki pushes me away, I fall into my partner, knocking us both to the ground. Within seconds I am back on my feet, giving a snarl as I see him running away. I move to go after him, but Hisoka's hand on my arm stops me, as well as his voice, "No. Leave him."
Anger pulses through my veins, and I spin to face him, "What do you mean leave him? If he gets away, he will only kill again! You know that, Hisoka!"
His eyes and manner reflect a calmness he does not feel; I can tell through our bond that he is troubled and deeply hurt. His soul bears the creases of worry and stress his face cannot reveal; his silence speaks to me far greater than any words ever could.
Even though he never opens his mouth, I can hear his thoughts, gently, within my own mind, 'If we go after him, we may have an even more terrible casualty... I feel it is best if we remain here."
It takes me a few moments to realize what he means, but as the sounds of someone crying fill the night sky, I understand. 'Watari...'
As I turn back to face my friend, I am overcome with grief. His normally cheerful face is contorted with both physical and emotional anguish, as he kneels in the crimson pool of his own blood, a pool that still grows around him. His companion in agony is poor 003, who flaps his good wing rapidly in vain, his other stuck at a strange, and undoubtedly painful, angle.
As he reaches out to cradle the injured bird carefully in his arms, the scientist's sobs only become deeper and more ragged, tears catching the moonlight to form silver streaks down his face. He rocks back and forth, murmuring something to his feathered companion, never once looking towards us. To him... we may as well not have been there at all.
'Yes... Watari needs us right now, Tsuzuki. He so rarely asks for anything in return for helping us; is it not time that we showed him how much we truly care?' My love's mind voice, colored with all the emotions he never displays, sinks into me, sharpening the strength of my own feelings. 'He and 003 need medical attention, which is not mentioning at all how terrified he must be from recent events.'
'Yes... and we do not even know exactly what it is Muraki said to him... good Gods!' As I continue to witness Watari's suffering, intense guilt fills my heart. I should have been able to stop Muraki from getting to him; I know how truly cold and evil he can be, finding the weak spots in your psyche. I do not know yet what he has said to Watari, or even what designs he has on the man, but it is my duty to stop them, just as much as it is my duty to comfort my friend.
And what have I done so far? Nothing, absolutely nothing! I did not keep the psychotic doctor from reaching him, from hurting 003; I did not pursue him, and my weak attempt at fighting him blew up in my face! And the worst, my supreme failure, is the fact that it did not even cross my mind immediately to console him. I, the one who tries to make sure everyone remains safe and happy, did not even think to go to my best friend, until Hisoka reminded me. I feel shame fill every corner of my being, and I know that I must not slack anymore.
My partner gives me a silent nod when I meet his eyes; I know he will not interfere. Although he has shown me Watari's condition, I know he has not the words nor the experience in handling people that is required for this situation, and so does he. Yet, the ripples of encouragement I feel coming from him are more than enough.
I walk towards my friend, placing a hand on his shoulder, speaking gently, "Watari? We need to get you to back to the Bureau..."
Without a sound he looks towards me, his eyes as golden orbs of pain, and without a word, he pulls 003 a little closer, resting him against his chest. The wounds have not yet closed on his body, and he truly looks as though he will pass out at any moment.
Ever so gently, I smile at him, "Yes... instead of you having to do all the medical work and hovering over the ill, you can have someone hover over you for once!"
My own false cheerfulness sticks in my throat, but I hope it does something to reassure him. For a long moment he does not answer, and I begin to worry. Yet, as I am about to speak again, I hear his soft whisper, "I do not care about myself... but 003... h-he..."
I force myself to grin wider, although what I truly wish to do is break into tears, "What? That little broken wing? That can be set again just as new! And just think, all the time you're being cared for, little 003 will be right there with you the entire time, screaming at them whenever he thinks they've mistreated you. It will be sort of a mini-vacation!"
Watari shivers, and in response, I wrap a friendly arm around his shoulders, giving him a soft hug, as not to harm him. Being so close, I catch his murmur, "But... Muraki..."
"No. Don't think of him. Look at me, Watari..." I wait until his eyes meet my own, and then I speak, trying to sound as comforting as I can, "I am sorry, so sorry that this happened to you. You cannot possibly understand how much. And, I do not know WHAT Muraki said to you or what he wants from you other than your pain and fear, but I promise you that Hisoka, myself, and every other shinigami will protect you. We will NOT allow that madman to harm you again!"
Hisoka's serious voice joins my own, "What did he say to you, Watari? You have to tell us; we have to know what it is that he wants from you, for your own protection."
The scientist's eyes begin to close, but he quickly opens them. He seems hesitant, and although I know he is struggling simply to remain conscious, I add to my partner's question, "Please Watari..."
Taking a ragged breath, he whispered, "He said... he would come back for me..."
He says no more, and I quickly catch him before he falls to the ground. He has once more slipped into the black oblivion that had been calling to him, and I must admit that I am relieved. At least there, he will feel no pain and be able to forget...
Hisoka gently removes 003 from the other man's embrace, and although the owl gives a slight squawk of protest, he does not struggle. He seems to realize that the separation will not be permanent and that, in order for us to help his master, he must cooperate.
The intelligence of the animal always astounds me, as it gives me a penetrating stare. That gaze speaks volumes, as he appears to be saying, "I heard what you promised him. I will not allow you to forget it; you must protect him now, since I could not. I trust you."
I know it to be nothing but my own fancy, but it only strengthens my resolve, as I lift my injured friend into my arms, "Come on Hisoka; let's take him home."
//Hisoka\\
It takes us hardly any time at all to return to the bureau; neither Tsuzuki nor myself carries a heavy burden.
At least not physically. For my part, the now resting 003 is nothing but a light, warm bundle of feather. I do not know if Tsuzuki is having trouble carrying Watari; my partner has not said a word since we left the crime scene.
This silence is uncharacteristic of him; I am beginning to become worried. I take a gentle look through our link, barely avoiding a gasp. The dark, brooding look on his face is nothing compared to the maelstrom of his mind. Guilt gnaws his insides, trapping his thoughts into a repetitive, deadly mantra. 'I failed him; I am worthless. No one deserves to put up with me. I failed him...'
There is no way to describe my pain as I witness this process, knowing that there is no possible way that I can comfort him. Still, I make an attempt, sending soft reassurance through the bond, 'Tsuzuki... this is not your fault. How were you to know?'
'I was immune to attack! Immune because that sick bastard loves me... immune because Muraki wants me alive! I should have realized sooner! All I had to do...'
I allow cold anger to shoot through me, giving him the equivalent of a mental slap. I feel his shock and surprise as he recoils, but I do not relent, 'All you had to do was go with Muraki, and then what? How would anything have been different?! He would not have called off that Oni; he would have let you WATCH as it destroyed us both! Now stop this! You are not helping anyone and only hurting yourself and me. I will not listen to this anymore!'
There is a silence, although I can feel his raging emotions. His depression battles against the wisdom and truth that I have said. Eventually, his darkness subsides, and I hear his loving voice, "Thank you Hisoka. I needed that."
Giving a nod, I am horrified to see that I am almost crying, but I cover it up quickly, running a hand over my eyes, "Just don't make me do it again too soon; I would hate to have to act as your conscience all the time."
He sends me a genuine smile, much more like himself as we enter the bureau. Almost immediately we run into Tatsumi, which comes as no great shock. The infamous accountant always seems to know when we are coming back in...
Immediately his eyes turn to the injured Watari, "What happened?"
Tsuzuki gave him a grim look, then casts a glance back to me, "I am going to put him in the medical section; get him up to speed while I'm gone, Hisoka."
I can see from Tatsumi's glance that he will not tolerate any further delays in getting information, so I quickly, but carefully, place the sleeping 003 on a table and procure two chairs for us, beginning to explain.
"As you know, Tsuzuki, Watari, and I left to investigate the newest site in the series of recent murders. We wanted to see what I could pick up using my empathy, and to be quite blunt, whether or not Muraki was somehow involved in it. This was confirmed when I touched the bloodstain of the victim; I clearly saw Muraki in my vision."
Giving a sigh, he removes his glasses, rubbing his temples, "I was afraid of it, but it is better to know for certain than merely suspect."
I merely nod my agreement before continuing, "However, I became trapped within myself, reliving the victim's death over and over again. Tsuzuki entered my mind to save me, and an unbreakable bond has formed between us."
Tatsumi raises a single chocolate brown, "Explain."
I had somewhat expected his skepticism, and so I answer evenly, "Well, the bond is unbreakable by either of us at any rate. It allows us to see one another's thoughts and emotions."
He gives me a thoughtful look, but he says nothing against my claim. Then again, this is Tatsumi, after all. He does not waste time stating how impossible something that has already occurred is; he takes that extra time to better digest the information, "Continue."
"After we discovered this strange turn of events, we were attacked by an Oni. Watari was the closest to the beast, and therefore the first attacked. Tsuzuki was immune, as it was Muraki that summoned the monster, and protected me from harm. While Tsuzuki and I attempted to battle as best we would, Watari formed a picture with his own blood and brought it to life, distracting the Oni long enough for Tsuzuki to summon a Guardian."
I pause to give him a moment to allow the information to sink in, then finish, "When Tsuzuki and I turned to check on Watari, we saw that Muraki had appeared and captured 003. He broke the owl's wing, told Watari he would return for him, and escaped."
The accountant's brows knit in thought, "Have you any idea what he might want with Watari?"
It is Tsuzuki who answers him, as he comes down the hall, "I think, when it comes to that, your guess is as good as ours, Tatsumi. I'm not sure ANYONE can understand the way Muraki's mind works."
"I suppose the one thing we can all agree on is that, whatever he is planning, it is not good," I state grimly.
My partner gives a sullen nod, as he moves to stand beside me, "At least we have an excuse to watch him for a few days; we can keep a guard on him as long as he and 003 need medical attention. That broken wing is going to take a while to heal properly..."
Tatsumi nods, "Indeed. Speaking of which, we had better try and find a veterinarian to tend to 003; there is no reason the poor creature should suffer through the night in pain."
Almost on queue, a soft hoot of pain rises from the owl, and I gently stroke his head feathers to soothe him, "Don't worry; we'll find somebody who can take care of you..."
Rising from his chair, Tatsumi also reaches out to stroke the bird, a gesture of affection I would not have associated with him, "Yes. I believe either you or Tsuzuki should go try now; I know it is late, but perhaps one of the animal shelters are open and can at least tell us how to make him comfortable. I shall go and report these events to the chief."
Both my partner and I bow slightly to him before he leaves, and before Tsuzuki can even speak, I scoop 003 into my arms once more, "I will look for the veterinarian; you stay here and watch over Watari. That is what you wish, is it not?"
He seems stunned, but a warm smile breaks over his face, "I guess you probably wouldn't have even needed our link to guess that, right? Don't tell me I'm really THAT predictable!"
Smirking, I give him a teasing reply, "But of course! Isn't that why so many love you? Now go and stand guard duty; I know you would never forgive yourself if anything happened to Watari now."
Tsuzuki swiftly pulls close to me, planting a gentle kiss on my forehead, "Thank you..."
It is good that he quickly goes walks down the hallway; I Can feel a blush spreading across my face. 'Thank goodness no one was here to see this...'
Silently, I walk out the door, cradling the injured owl carefully in my arms. Staring out into the bleak night, I begin my quest.
//Watari\\
When I slowly open my eyes, I feel that momentary disorientation that comes from having been unconscious. Where am I? How did I get here? What has happened since I was last awake? My thoughts are indistinct and fuzzy; I feel that I am still half asleep. I am nice and warm beneath my blankets; I do not wish to move. Yet, that curious, scientist part of my brain refuses to let me leave these mysteries unanswered, and with a yawn, I sit up.
As pain lances through my chest, the flood of recent memories overcomes me. Wincing, I raise my hands to my head, trying to block them out, but even as I do so I know it is no use. Images flash through my mind; the fight with the Oni, being wounded, the picture, and Muraki.
Yes... Muraki, the one I remember the most, the one I wish to forget. His hair gleaming in the moonlight, his eyes just as silver. His mocking smile. I hear the snap of 003's wing; I feel his warm breath on my ear, 'I will come back for you...'
Although terror washes over my heart, it is not my strongest emotion; my confusion is deeper. Why? What possible use could I be to this mad doctor? He does not even know me, except for a passing glance. Is it some sort of measure to hurt Tsuzuki and Hisoka?
As soon as the idea occurs to me, I am forced to think it over, even as I shudder beneath the sheets. Yes... that would seem to be the most logical thing. He has, after all, done similar things to both of my fellow Shinigami before; I know that he has no respect for any form of life, as long as he achieves his goal.
The pain of 003? Directed towards myself, of course; why be satisfied with using me to cause the pain of others when he can go a step further and cause me pain?
The thought, though dark, makes me want to laugh. I cannot even be tormented for my own worth; everything about me is to further along someone else. It is a strangely ironic thing, though a rather depressing one.
'Well, no point in remaining here alone. If I think about this anymore, I dare say I may ACTUALLY go into a depression!'
Immediately when I remove my covers, I feel cold air assail my chest and back. Glancing down, I notice that I am shirtless, though my wounds are wrapped with bandages. They are soaked with blood, but it seems to be old, not fresh.
I suddenly wonder where everyone is. I have a vague memory of Tsuzuki carrying me, which would explain how I arrived here. It is not like the bureau to leave a wounded man unattended; I know that I have sat up many a time with a patient, if for no other reason than to be there to greet them when they awaken.
It saddens me that there is no one here, but the brief burst of emotion does not last. Knowing Tsuzuki, he is probably whipping up some God-awful confectionary creation in an effort to raise my spirits, while Hisoka explains to the higher ups how I got into my injured state.
I wish they had left 003 with me though; I miss my owl companion terribly. Not to mention the fact that I would love to know just how badly he is injured; I only hope the break is clean enough not to cripple him.
With nothing better to distract me, I walk to the window in order to take a look outside. The cherry trees, always in blossom, are a comforting sight. I have always loved to look at them, whether in the golden sunshine or the silvery moonlight; both accent their natural beauty.
I suddenly have an urge to go out amongst those fragrant branches and wander about, leaving behind my troubles, if only for a few moments. Out there, I will not have to worry for 003 or face the new demon that plagues my memories; out there, no one is responsible for me.
Yet, another part of me argues against it. If indeed the deadly Muraki is after me, would it not be foolish to go about frolicking in the flowers, no matter how lovely? I would be putting myself into a compromising position! Not to mention that the others would be worried about me...
The seductive thought lingers, almost caressing my mind. Really? Well, where are the others? If they are not here, worried over me, why would they be any time soon? No, perhaps a nice stroll through the orchard is just what I need. As for Muraki, surely he would not dare to come here? Even if he does, can I not take care of myself, as I have always done?
I look towards my shirt and coat, wincing at the amount of blood on them. I cannot bring myself to put them on, but a quick look about allows me to find a shirt, presumably from the last occupant. It's a bit big, but that may not be a bad thing, considering the bandages wrapped about me.
I stealthily open the window, savoring the sweet, delicate scent of the cherry blossoms that wafts in with the warm, night breeze. Carefully, oh so carefully do I sneak through it, and I cannot help but feel a certain amount of satisfaction as my feet touch the ground. Let them come in and find me gone; let them think that I've been kidnapped. That would teach them to leave someone alone when a killer's after them!
I know the sentiment is childish, but I cannot help but laugh at the mental image of my friends' faces when I sneak up behind them and cheerfully announce I have not been taken at all. There will be scolding, yes, and threats, but eventually there would be relieved laughter and joy. That will make the prank all worth while.
The light breeze continues to rustle the trees, but it is a soft, soothing sound. The inner peace and calm that I am always seeking floods my being; I know it will not last. As soon as I go back, all of the chaos will churn in my soul. I will begin to wonder how best to protect myself and the others; I will come up with theories about the reasoning of Muraki's mind and attempt to add helpful information to a plan to destroy him.
That will entail lots of research; lots of work. Then there will be 003 to take care of, once he gets back from the vet. I will bury myself into my projects, both professional and personal, and I will not think to come have a nice walk like this again for a long time. There is no sadness in this contemplation of my life; it is simply the way it has always been.
I reach up to catch one of the falling petals, and then smile as I drop it, allowing it to finish it's journey to the ground. I think about the poor, empty vase resting on my desk and how long it has been since some fresh flowers have resided in it. Yes, I do believe a few tiny branches would fill it nicely.
I move towards one of the trees, reaching up to stroke some of the blossoms. To my horror, a slim, pale hand covers my own, even as a strong arm slips about my waist and a voice chimes softly, "And here I was thinking it would be so difficult to find you..."
My heart hammering in my chest, I can only think to whisper his name, "Muraki..."
A deep chuckle rises from him, as his lips brush my ear, "Good evening, Watari. Are the cherry blossoms not lovely? If only we had a blood red moon, this would be a perfect night..."
"You did not come here to talk to me of flowers!" I feel my voice waver slightly, and I curse my transparent fear. It unnerves me that he managed to sneak up on me, especially in this place. I felt safe here; this was my shelter! Now my sanctuary has been invaded, riddled with a silver-tongued demon I cannot exorcise, one that holds me close to himself when all I want is for him not to touch me at all!
As if in response to my thoughts, the hand clutching my fingers gives them a light cares before trailing down my arm, making its way to drape across my chest, "No, indeed I did not."
I cannot suppress the shudders running through my body, "What do you wish of me? No more games! You sent that Oni to destroy Hisoka and I, and then suddenly you turned your sights to me! Why? Of what possible use could I be to you?"
"Poor, confused soul, flailing like a bird in a storm, are you? It is really quite simple Watari; I want your blood..."
//Muraki\\
I smile as the man in my arms stiffens. I can almost taste his fear as I hold him, and I lower my voice even more, although there is no one around but the two of us, "Is that not what you wanted to know? Does my answer displease you? I could have lied to you, pretty bird, but I did not. Should I have done so?"
"But... why? Why me, over Hisoka or anyone else?"
I rest my chin in the sea of soft golden hair before me, turning my voice to silk, "Your blood holds the power that I seek; no other does. I do dearly crave that boy's blood; the sweetness of it, the beautiful color of it on his flesh. Yet the need for yours is greater and for quite a different reason. I need your blood to perform a resurrection..."
He strains to pull away from me, but I do not loosen my grip, and I hear him gasp in pain before speaking again, "You think... my blood has the power to bring people to life? Did you think this from the battle against the Oni? I hate to be the one to inform you... that you are sadly mistaken. My blood holds no mystical powers."
I have seen many people beg for their lives. Men, women, children; all sound the same to me. Some shed tears; some merely scream for mercy. Fathers with dependant families show how much they are needed to help the others survive; mothers tearfully list the names and ages of their children. Young people of both genders offer themselves, body and soul, if I will only let them live to see another dawn. Small children merely exhibit every fiber of their fear.
There are some who do not beg, of course. These are the fighters, those who strike without warning, using every weapon they possibly can to survive. Even when they are taking their dying breath, they never allow a plea for mercy to cross their lips. These have always been the ones that I have found kinship with, these proud few who will not admit defeat.
To have someone in my arms, completely in my power, to feel them shudder with fear and then tell me, his voice eerily calm that I am completely mistaken in my desire of their death unnerves me. What sort of man says such a thing?
Taking my silence as a bad sign, his body tenses even more, as his cultured voice fills the air, "You misinterpreted by shinigami power from what you saw. I can draw pictures and then bring them to life; the blood I used had nothing whatsoever to do with the process. Ink, paint, or anything else would have sufficed just as well."
Releasing him from my embrace, I spin him about so I can see his face, grasping his shoulders. His golden eyes are wide behind the lens of his glasses, but just as penetrating as ever. He meets my gaze readily, and my curiosity grows. I can read the terror in those eyes, can see it written in every part of him, yet he tries to stand strong. Why?
I narrow my own eyes, "Why should I believe what you say, my dear Watari? This could simply be a ploy to continue your life; perhaps your blood can indeed do what I desire."
"You are, of course, correct. However, what if you are wrong? What if you kill me and take my blood, and then you receive no results? Would it not be more logical simply to take me alive, test this other explanation I have offered you, and then make a decision? You will have me near you, and as a doctor, you can test various blood samples to try and prove your theory. You can always kill me again if I do indeed lie; there is no way you can lose."
Now he lowers his eyes, staring at the ground, "I do not wish to die, that is true. However, I would hate even more for my death to come as a result of a confusion! If you are going to kill me, I want it to be for something other than this false mysticism! I will go with you willingly before I allow that to happen!"
Truly astounding. I cannot help the smirk that rises to my face. So this is the source of his strength: his scientific mind. He does not mind dying at the hands of a psychotic killer; he simply does not want to die over something that he knows to be false. He wants the cause of his death to be logical, and for that he is willing to place himself in the hands of a murderer.
Cupping his chin in my hand, I force him to look up again, "You seem to indicate you are willing to come with me of your own accord or do I misinterpret you?"
Watari nods, slowly, "Perhaps it would be better for me to say I am willing to bargain with you. I will come with you willingly, doing whatever task you ask of me, no matter what the risk to myself. In return, you will not kill any more innocents to lure Tsuzuki out, and you will not try to harm Hisoka during the time I am with you."
Smiling, I cock my head, "You are truly in no position to be making such propositions to anyone. Tell me, why should I bind myself to this contract when I can simply steal you away."
"If you try, I will take a knife and plunge into my own heart. If I cannot find a knife, I will find another way. If these terms are not agreed upon, then I am not going to allow you to benefit in anyway from me. You can try the blood after that; I guarantee it will not work." Life has returned to his voice, and now a humorless smile crosses his lips, "Is jeopardizing your goal worth the risk? You really do not strike me as much of a gambling man, and if you are, then surely you must for the side with better odds."
I have been trying to fathom the mind of the most unusual man, and this proposal forces me to realize something about his character. He feels he is totally worthless; he truly does not care what happens to him, so long as others are safe. His co-workers, his friends, even people he does not know... all come before himself in the scheme of things.
I am forced to wonder what events in his human life led to this belief; I am forced to wonder if his friends even know the deepness of his despair. Because that is an emotion he lives with, the feelings of worthlessness, the self-hatred, overwhelming, black despair...
And now he is waltzing into my hands! He is asking me to take him! To take such feelings and make them even darker... that shall be a delightful task. I can teach him torments he has never dreamed of, and every moment I can know that I have him completely and utterly in my power.
He closes his eyes, giving a mirthless laugh, "It is a Devil's bargain, and I know it; you need not try to hide your feelings about it. Yet, what have you to lose?"
I am interested, and I do not try to hide the fact. This venture may turn out to be even more profitable than I had ever hoped for. Smiling, I nod, "I accept your offer."
Relief shines through his eyes, but it does not do so for long before I strike a blow to his temple, rendering him unconscious immediately. Lifting him into my arms, I marvel at how truly lucky I am to have come across such a catch. Saki can still be resurrected; my lovely Tsuzuki will still be safe. Not to mention that I have a new toy to play with...
Looking down at him, in my arms, I cannot help but chuckle softly, "I only hope that you realize what you are truly getting yourself into..."
'' indicates thoughts or telepathy
//\\ indicates character from whose POV the story is told at the time
//Tsuzuki\\
As Muraki pushes me away, I fall into my partner, knocking us both to the ground. Within seconds I am back on my feet, giving a snarl as I see him running away. I move to go after him, but Hisoka's hand on my arm stops me, as well as his voice, "No. Leave him."
Anger pulses through my veins, and I spin to face him, "What do you mean leave him? If he gets away, he will only kill again! You know that, Hisoka!"
His eyes and manner reflect a calmness he does not feel; I can tell through our bond that he is troubled and deeply hurt. His soul bears the creases of worry and stress his face cannot reveal; his silence speaks to me far greater than any words ever could.
Even though he never opens his mouth, I can hear his thoughts, gently, within my own mind, 'If we go after him, we may have an even more terrible casualty... I feel it is best if we remain here."
It takes me a few moments to realize what he means, but as the sounds of someone crying fill the night sky, I understand. 'Watari...'
As I turn back to face my friend, I am overcome with grief. His normally cheerful face is contorted with both physical and emotional anguish, as he kneels in the crimson pool of his own blood, a pool that still grows around him. His companion in agony is poor 003, who flaps his good wing rapidly in vain, his other stuck at a strange, and undoubtedly painful, angle.
As he reaches out to cradle the injured bird carefully in his arms, the scientist's sobs only become deeper and more ragged, tears catching the moonlight to form silver streaks down his face. He rocks back and forth, murmuring something to his feathered companion, never once looking towards us. To him... we may as well not have been there at all.
'Yes... Watari needs us right now, Tsuzuki. He so rarely asks for anything in return for helping us; is it not time that we showed him how much we truly care?' My love's mind voice, colored with all the emotions he never displays, sinks into me, sharpening the strength of my own feelings. 'He and 003 need medical attention, which is not mentioning at all how terrified he must be from recent events.'
'Yes... and we do not even know exactly what it is Muraki said to him... good Gods!' As I continue to witness Watari's suffering, intense guilt fills my heart. I should have been able to stop Muraki from getting to him; I know how truly cold and evil he can be, finding the weak spots in your psyche. I do not know yet what he has said to Watari, or even what designs he has on the man, but it is my duty to stop them, just as much as it is my duty to comfort my friend.
And what have I done so far? Nothing, absolutely nothing! I did not keep the psychotic doctor from reaching him, from hurting 003; I did not pursue him, and my weak attempt at fighting him blew up in my face! And the worst, my supreme failure, is the fact that it did not even cross my mind immediately to console him. I, the one who tries to make sure everyone remains safe and happy, did not even think to go to my best friend, until Hisoka reminded me. I feel shame fill every corner of my being, and I know that I must not slack anymore.
My partner gives me a silent nod when I meet his eyes; I know he will not interfere. Although he has shown me Watari's condition, I know he has not the words nor the experience in handling people that is required for this situation, and so does he. Yet, the ripples of encouragement I feel coming from him are more than enough.
I walk towards my friend, placing a hand on his shoulder, speaking gently, "Watari? We need to get you to back to the Bureau..."
Without a sound he looks towards me, his eyes as golden orbs of pain, and without a word, he pulls 003 a little closer, resting him against his chest. The wounds have not yet closed on his body, and he truly looks as though he will pass out at any moment.
Ever so gently, I smile at him, "Yes... instead of you having to do all the medical work and hovering over the ill, you can have someone hover over you for once!"
My own false cheerfulness sticks in my throat, but I hope it does something to reassure him. For a long moment he does not answer, and I begin to worry. Yet, as I am about to speak again, I hear his soft whisper, "I do not care about myself... but 003... h-he..."
I force myself to grin wider, although what I truly wish to do is break into tears, "What? That little broken wing? That can be set again just as new! And just think, all the time you're being cared for, little 003 will be right there with you the entire time, screaming at them whenever he thinks they've mistreated you. It will be sort of a mini-vacation!"
Watari shivers, and in response, I wrap a friendly arm around his shoulders, giving him a soft hug, as not to harm him. Being so close, I catch his murmur, "But... Muraki..."
"No. Don't think of him. Look at me, Watari..." I wait until his eyes meet my own, and then I speak, trying to sound as comforting as I can, "I am sorry, so sorry that this happened to you. You cannot possibly understand how much. And, I do not know WHAT Muraki said to you or what he wants from you other than your pain and fear, but I promise you that Hisoka, myself, and every other shinigami will protect you. We will NOT allow that madman to harm you again!"
Hisoka's serious voice joins my own, "What did he say to you, Watari? You have to tell us; we have to know what it is that he wants from you, for your own protection."
The scientist's eyes begin to close, but he quickly opens them. He seems hesitant, and although I know he is struggling simply to remain conscious, I add to my partner's question, "Please Watari..."
Taking a ragged breath, he whispered, "He said... he would come back for me..."
He says no more, and I quickly catch him before he falls to the ground. He has once more slipped into the black oblivion that had been calling to him, and I must admit that I am relieved. At least there, he will feel no pain and be able to forget...
Hisoka gently removes 003 from the other man's embrace, and although the owl gives a slight squawk of protest, he does not struggle. He seems to realize that the separation will not be permanent and that, in order for us to help his master, he must cooperate.
The intelligence of the animal always astounds me, as it gives me a penetrating stare. That gaze speaks volumes, as he appears to be saying, "I heard what you promised him. I will not allow you to forget it; you must protect him now, since I could not. I trust you."
I know it to be nothing but my own fancy, but it only strengthens my resolve, as I lift my injured friend into my arms, "Come on Hisoka; let's take him home."
//Hisoka\\
It takes us hardly any time at all to return to the bureau; neither Tsuzuki nor myself carries a heavy burden.
At least not physically. For my part, the now resting 003 is nothing but a light, warm bundle of feather. I do not know if Tsuzuki is having trouble carrying Watari; my partner has not said a word since we left the crime scene.
This silence is uncharacteristic of him; I am beginning to become worried. I take a gentle look through our link, barely avoiding a gasp. The dark, brooding look on his face is nothing compared to the maelstrom of his mind. Guilt gnaws his insides, trapping his thoughts into a repetitive, deadly mantra. 'I failed him; I am worthless. No one deserves to put up with me. I failed him...'
There is no way to describe my pain as I witness this process, knowing that there is no possible way that I can comfort him. Still, I make an attempt, sending soft reassurance through the bond, 'Tsuzuki... this is not your fault. How were you to know?'
'I was immune to attack! Immune because that sick bastard loves me... immune because Muraki wants me alive! I should have realized sooner! All I had to do...'
I allow cold anger to shoot through me, giving him the equivalent of a mental slap. I feel his shock and surprise as he recoils, but I do not relent, 'All you had to do was go with Muraki, and then what? How would anything have been different?! He would not have called off that Oni; he would have let you WATCH as it destroyed us both! Now stop this! You are not helping anyone and only hurting yourself and me. I will not listen to this anymore!'
There is a silence, although I can feel his raging emotions. His depression battles against the wisdom and truth that I have said. Eventually, his darkness subsides, and I hear his loving voice, "Thank you Hisoka. I needed that."
Giving a nod, I am horrified to see that I am almost crying, but I cover it up quickly, running a hand over my eyes, "Just don't make me do it again too soon; I would hate to have to act as your conscience all the time."
He sends me a genuine smile, much more like himself as we enter the bureau. Almost immediately we run into Tatsumi, which comes as no great shock. The infamous accountant always seems to know when we are coming back in...
Immediately his eyes turn to the injured Watari, "What happened?"
Tsuzuki gave him a grim look, then casts a glance back to me, "I am going to put him in the medical section; get him up to speed while I'm gone, Hisoka."
I can see from Tatsumi's glance that he will not tolerate any further delays in getting information, so I quickly, but carefully, place the sleeping 003 on a table and procure two chairs for us, beginning to explain.
"As you know, Tsuzuki, Watari, and I left to investigate the newest site in the series of recent murders. We wanted to see what I could pick up using my empathy, and to be quite blunt, whether or not Muraki was somehow involved in it. This was confirmed when I touched the bloodstain of the victim; I clearly saw Muraki in my vision."
Giving a sigh, he removes his glasses, rubbing his temples, "I was afraid of it, but it is better to know for certain than merely suspect."
I merely nod my agreement before continuing, "However, I became trapped within myself, reliving the victim's death over and over again. Tsuzuki entered my mind to save me, and an unbreakable bond has formed between us."
Tatsumi raises a single chocolate brown, "Explain."
I had somewhat expected his skepticism, and so I answer evenly, "Well, the bond is unbreakable by either of us at any rate. It allows us to see one another's thoughts and emotions."
He gives me a thoughtful look, but he says nothing against my claim. Then again, this is Tatsumi, after all. He does not waste time stating how impossible something that has already occurred is; he takes that extra time to better digest the information, "Continue."
"After we discovered this strange turn of events, we were attacked by an Oni. Watari was the closest to the beast, and therefore the first attacked. Tsuzuki was immune, as it was Muraki that summoned the monster, and protected me from harm. While Tsuzuki and I attempted to battle as best we would, Watari formed a picture with his own blood and brought it to life, distracting the Oni long enough for Tsuzuki to summon a Guardian."
I pause to give him a moment to allow the information to sink in, then finish, "When Tsuzuki and I turned to check on Watari, we saw that Muraki had appeared and captured 003. He broke the owl's wing, told Watari he would return for him, and escaped."
The accountant's brows knit in thought, "Have you any idea what he might want with Watari?"
It is Tsuzuki who answers him, as he comes down the hall, "I think, when it comes to that, your guess is as good as ours, Tatsumi. I'm not sure ANYONE can understand the way Muraki's mind works."
"I suppose the one thing we can all agree on is that, whatever he is planning, it is not good," I state grimly.
My partner gives a sullen nod, as he moves to stand beside me, "At least we have an excuse to watch him for a few days; we can keep a guard on him as long as he and 003 need medical attention. That broken wing is going to take a while to heal properly..."
Tatsumi nods, "Indeed. Speaking of which, we had better try and find a veterinarian to tend to 003; there is no reason the poor creature should suffer through the night in pain."
Almost on queue, a soft hoot of pain rises from the owl, and I gently stroke his head feathers to soothe him, "Don't worry; we'll find somebody who can take care of you..."
Rising from his chair, Tatsumi also reaches out to stroke the bird, a gesture of affection I would not have associated with him, "Yes. I believe either you or Tsuzuki should go try now; I know it is late, but perhaps one of the animal shelters are open and can at least tell us how to make him comfortable. I shall go and report these events to the chief."
Both my partner and I bow slightly to him before he leaves, and before Tsuzuki can even speak, I scoop 003 into my arms once more, "I will look for the veterinarian; you stay here and watch over Watari. That is what you wish, is it not?"
He seems stunned, but a warm smile breaks over his face, "I guess you probably wouldn't have even needed our link to guess that, right? Don't tell me I'm really THAT predictable!"
Smirking, I give him a teasing reply, "But of course! Isn't that why so many love you? Now go and stand guard duty; I know you would never forgive yourself if anything happened to Watari now."
Tsuzuki swiftly pulls close to me, planting a gentle kiss on my forehead, "Thank you..."
It is good that he quickly goes walks down the hallway; I Can feel a blush spreading across my face. 'Thank goodness no one was here to see this...'
Silently, I walk out the door, cradling the injured owl carefully in my arms. Staring out into the bleak night, I begin my quest.
//Watari\\
When I slowly open my eyes, I feel that momentary disorientation that comes from having been unconscious. Where am I? How did I get here? What has happened since I was last awake? My thoughts are indistinct and fuzzy; I feel that I am still half asleep. I am nice and warm beneath my blankets; I do not wish to move. Yet, that curious, scientist part of my brain refuses to let me leave these mysteries unanswered, and with a yawn, I sit up.
As pain lances through my chest, the flood of recent memories overcomes me. Wincing, I raise my hands to my head, trying to block them out, but even as I do so I know it is no use. Images flash through my mind; the fight with the Oni, being wounded, the picture, and Muraki.
Yes... Muraki, the one I remember the most, the one I wish to forget. His hair gleaming in the moonlight, his eyes just as silver. His mocking smile. I hear the snap of 003's wing; I feel his warm breath on my ear, 'I will come back for you...'
Although terror washes over my heart, it is not my strongest emotion; my confusion is deeper. Why? What possible use could I be to this mad doctor? He does not even know me, except for a passing glance. Is it some sort of measure to hurt Tsuzuki and Hisoka?
As soon as the idea occurs to me, I am forced to think it over, even as I shudder beneath the sheets. Yes... that would seem to be the most logical thing. He has, after all, done similar things to both of my fellow Shinigami before; I know that he has no respect for any form of life, as long as he achieves his goal.
The pain of 003? Directed towards myself, of course; why be satisfied with using me to cause the pain of others when he can go a step further and cause me pain?
The thought, though dark, makes me want to laugh. I cannot even be tormented for my own worth; everything about me is to further along someone else. It is a strangely ironic thing, though a rather depressing one.
'Well, no point in remaining here alone. If I think about this anymore, I dare say I may ACTUALLY go into a depression!'
Immediately when I remove my covers, I feel cold air assail my chest and back. Glancing down, I notice that I am shirtless, though my wounds are wrapped with bandages. They are soaked with blood, but it seems to be old, not fresh.
I suddenly wonder where everyone is. I have a vague memory of Tsuzuki carrying me, which would explain how I arrived here. It is not like the bureau to leave a wounded man unattended; I know that I have sat up many a time with a patient, if for no other reason than to be there to greet them when they awaken.
It saddens me that there is no one here, but the brief burst of emotion does not last. Knowing Tsuzuki, he is probably whipping up some God-awful confectionary creation in an effort to raise my spirits, while Hisoka explains to the higher ups how I got into my injured state.
I wish they had left 003 with me though; I miss my owl companion terribly. Not to mention the fact that I would love to know just how badly he is injured; I only hope the break is clean enough not to cripple him.
With nothing better to distract me, I walk to the window in order to take a look outside. The cherry trees, always in blossom, are a comforting sight. I have always loved to look at them, whether in the golden sunshine or the silvery moonlight; both accent their natural beauty.
I suddenly have an urge to go out amongst those fragrant branches and wander about, leaving behind my troubles, if only for a few moments. Out there, I will not have to worry for 003 or face the new demon that plagues my memories; out there, no one is responsible for me.
Yet, another part of me argues against it. If indeed the deadly Muraki is after me, would it not be foolish to go about frolicking in the flowers, no matter how lovely? I would be putting myself into a compromising position! Not to mention that the others would be worried about me...
The seductive thought lingers, almost caressing my mind. Really? Well, where are the others? If they are not here, worried over me, why would they be any time soon? No, perhaps a nice stroll through the orchard is just what I need. As for Muraki, surely he would not dare to come here? Even if he does, can I not take care of myself, as I have always done?
I look towards my shirt and coat, wincing at the amount of blood on them. I cannot bring myself to put them on, but a quick look about allows me to find a shirt, presumably from the last occupant. It's a bit big, but that may not be a bad thing, considering the bandages wrapped about me.
I stealthily open the window, savoring the sweet, delicate scent of the cherry blossoms that wafts in with the warm, night breeze. Carefully, oh so carefully do I sneak through it, and I cannot help but feel a certain amount of satisfaction as my feet touch the ground. Let them come in and find me gone; let them think that I've been kidnapped. That would teach them to leave someone alone when a killer's after them!
I know the sentiment is childish, but I cannot help but laugh at the mental image of my friends' faces when I sneak up behind them and cheerfully announce I have not been taken at all. There will be scolding, yes, and threats, but eventually there would be relieved laughter and joy. That will make the prank all worth while.
The light breeze continues to rustle the trees, but it is a soft, soothing sound. The inner peace and calm that I am always seeking floods my being; I know it will not last. As soon as I go back, all of the chaos will churn in my soul. I will begin to wonder how best to protect myself and the others; I will come up with theories about the reasoning of Muraki's mind and attempt to add helpful information to a plan to destroy him.
That will entail lots of research; lots of work. Then there will be 003 to take care of, once he gets back from the vet. I will bury myself into my projects, both professional and personal, and I will not think to come have a nice walk like this again for a long time. There is no sadness in this contemplation of my life; it is simply the way it has always been.
I reach up to catch one of the falling petals, and then smile as I drop it, allowing it to finish it's journey to the ground. I think about the poor, empty vase resting on my desk and how long it has been since some fresh flowers have resided in it. Yes, I do believe a few tiny branches would fill it nicely.
I move towards one of the trees, reaching up to stroke some of the blossoms. To my horror, a slim, pale hand covers my own, even as a strong arm slips about my waist and a voice chimes softly, "And here I was thinking it would be so difficult to find you..."
My heart hammering in my chest, I can only think to whisper his name, "Muraki..."
A deep chuckle rises from him, as his lips brush my ear, "Good evening, Watari. Are the cherry blossoms not lovely? If only we had a blood red moon, this would be a perfect night..."
"You did not come here to talk to me of flowers!" I feel my voice waver slightly, and I curse my transparent fear. It unnerves me that he managed to sneak up on me, especially in this place. I felt safe here; this was my shelter! Now my sanctuary has been invaded, riddled with a silver-tongued demon I cannot exorcise, one that holds me close to himself when all I want is for him not to touch me at all!
As if in response to my thoughts, the hand clutching my fingers gives them a light cares before trailing down my arm, making its way to drape across my chest, "No, indeed I did not."
I cannot suppress the shudders running through my body, "What do you wish of me? No more games! You sent that Oni to destroy Hisoka and I, and then suddenly you turned your sights to me! Why? Of what possible use could I be to you?"
"Poor, confused soul, flailing like a bird in a storm, are you? It is really quite simple Watari; I want your blood..."
//Muraki\\
I smile as the man in my arms stiffens. I can almost taste his fear as I hold him, and I lower my voice even more, although there is no one around but the two of us, "Is that not what you wanted to know? Does my answer displease you? I could have lied to you, pretty bird, but I did not. Should I have done so?"
"But... why? Why me, over Hisoka or anyone else?"
I rest my chin in the sea of soft golden hair before me, turning my voice to silk, "Your blood holds the power that I seek; no other does. I do dearly crave that boy's blood; the sweetness of it, the beautiful color of it on his flesh. Yet the need for yours is greater and for quite a different reason. I need your blood to perform a resurrection..."
He strains to pull away from me, but I do not loosen my grip, and I hear him gasp in pain before speaking again, "You think... my blood has the power to bring people to life? Did you think this from the battle against the Oni? I hate to be the one to inform you... that you are sadly mistaken. My blood holds no mystical powers."
I have seen many people beg for their lives. Men, women, children; all sound the same to me. Some shed tears; some merely scream for mercy. Fathers with dependant families show how much they are needed to help the others survive; mothers tearfully list the names and ages of their children. Young people of both genders offer themselves, body and soul, if I will only let them live to see another dawn. Small children merely exhibit every fiber of their fear.
There are some who do not beg, of course. These are the fighters, those who strike without warning, using every weapon they possibly can to survive. Even when they are taking their dying breath, they never allow a plea for mercy to cross their lips. These have always been the ones that I have found kinship with, these proud few who will not admit defeat.
To have someone in my arms, completely in my power, to feel them shudder with fear and then tell me, his voice eerily calm that I am completely mistaken in my desire of their death unnerves me. What sort of man says such a thing?
Taking my silence as a bad sign, his body tenses even more, as his cultured voice fills the air, "You misinterpreted by shinigami power from what you saw. I can draw pictures and then bring them to life; the blood I used had nothing whatsoever to do with the process. Ink, paint, or anything else would have sufficed just as well."
Releasing him from my embrace, I spin him about so I can see his face, grasping his shoulders. His golden eyes are wide behind the lens of his glasses, but just as penetrating as ever. He meets my gaze readily, and my curiosity grows. I can read the terror in those eyes, can see it written in every part of him, yet he tries to stand strong. Why?
I narrow my own eyes, "Why should I believe what you say, my dear Watari? This could simply be a ploy to continue your life; perhaps your blood can indeed do what I desire."
"You are, of course, correct. However, what if you are wrong? What if you kill me and take my blood, and then you receive no results? Would it not be more logical simply to take me alive, test this other explanation I have offered you, and then make a decision? You will have me near you, and as a doctor, you can test various blood samples to try and prove your theory. You can always kill me again if I do indeed lie; there is no way you can lose."
Now he lowers his eyes, staring at the ground, "I do not wish to die, that is true. However, I would hate even more for my death to come as a result of a confusion! If you are going to kill me, I want it to be for something other than this false mysticism! I will go with you willingly before I allow that to happen!"
Truly astounding. I cannot help the smirk that rises to my face. So this is the source of his strength: his scientific mind. He does not mind dying at the hands of a psychotic killer; he simply does not want to die over something that he knows to be false. He wants the cause of his death to be logical, and for that he is willing to place himself in the hands of a murderer.
Cupping his chin in my hand, I force him to look up again, "You seem to indicate you are willing to come with me of your own accord or do I misinterpret you?"
Watari nods, slowly, "Perhaps it would be better for me to say I am willing to bargain with you. I will come with you willingly, doing whatever task you ask of me, no matter what the risk to myself. In return, you will not kill any more innocents to lure Tsuzuki out, and you will not try to harm Hisoka during the time I am with you."
Smiling, I cock my head, "You are truly in no position to be making such propositions to anyone. Tell me, why should I bind myself to this contract when I can simply steal you away."
"If you try, I will take a knife and plunge into my own heart. If I cannot find a knife, I will find another way. If these terms are not agreed upon, then I am not going to allow you to benefit in anyway from me. You can try the blood after that; I guarantee it will not work." Life has returned to his voice, and now a humorless smile crosses his lips, "Is jeopardizing your goal worth the risk? You really do not strike me as much of a gambling man, and if you are, then surely you must for the side with better odds."
I have been trying to fathom the mind of the most unusual man, and this proposal forces me to realize something about his character. He feels he is totally worthless; he truly does not care what happens to him, so long as others are safe. His co-workers, his friends, even people he does not know... all come before himself in the scheme of things.
I am forced to wonder what events in his human life led to this belief; I am forced to wonder if his friends even know the deepness of his despair. Because that is an emotion he lives with, the feelings of worthlessness, the self-hatred, overwhelming, black despair...
And now he is waltzing into my hands! He is asking me to take him! To take such feelings and make them even darker... that shall be a delightful task. I can teach him torments he has never dreamed of, and every moment I can know that I have him completely and utterly in my power.
He closes his eyes, giving a mirthless laugh, "It is a Devil's bargain, and I know it; you need not try to hide your feelings about it. Yet, what have you to lose?"
I am interested, and I do not try to hide the fact. This venture may turn out to be even more profitable than I had ever hoped for. Smiling, I nod, "I accept your offer."
Relief shines through his eyes, but it does not do so for long before I strike a blow to his temple, rendering him unconscious immediately. Lifting him into my arms, I marvel at how truly lucky I am to have come across such a catch. Saki can still be resurrected; my lovely Tsuzuki will still be safe. Not to mention that I have a new toy to play with...
Looking down at him, in my arms, I cannot help but chuckle softly, "I only hope that you realize what you are truly getting yourself into..."