Disclaimer- I don't own Inuyasha. Or do I? Mwahahahahahahaha…
Fic #1
Ryoko: Hiya, guys! This is my hanyo, Inuyasha! (Pulls Inuyasha out of her pocket.)
Weijia: Cool! (Hugs Inuyasha.)
Rebecca: Why does he have long hair? Is he a girl? (Laughs.)
Inuyasha: I may be only half human, but I'm 100% male.
Rebecca: I'm sure. So Ryoko, where'd ya get him?
Ryoko: (Looks uncomfortable.) Well, let's just say I bought him from a rather shady character in a van.
Inuyasha: She doesn't own me! Help! That van guy hanyo-napped me! Call the police!
Weijia: So what should we do, Ryoko?
Ryoko: Buy me a Sprite and he's half yours.
Weijia: Deal. (They shake on it.)
Inuyasha: No! Heeeeeeelp! (They drag him off.)
Rebecca: That was weird. (Goes back to reading her book.)
Fic #2
Ryoko: We're back again. My Inuyasha is missing! Waaaaaaa! (Sobs uncontrollably.)
Weijia: Hi!
Ryoko: And I've just bought Sesshomaru on e-bay. (Has a fake grin.)
Taylor: (Appears from nowhere.) Liar! I own him. (Hits Ryoko over the head with a 3-pound ham and disappears.)
Ryoko: (Unconscious.)
Weijia: Not again. (Gets Inuyasha out of her pocket.) Oh, Ryoko. Look who's here. It's Inuyasha!
Ryoko: (Wakes up.) Where?
Inuyasha: Uh-oh.
Ryoko: Oh, Inuyasha! Where were you? (Hugs him.)
Inuyasha: (Points to Weijia.) In her pocket. She stole me again.
Weijia: Don't listen to him! He was hiding from you. (Looks at him accusingly.)
Inuyasha: What? No, no, it's not--
Ryoko: (Death glare.) Rrrrr-- Inuyasha! (Charges at him.)
Inuyasha: No, stop, I thought you liked me! (Running.)
Ryoko: We always hurt the ones we love.
Weijia: (Cackles evilly.)
Fic #3
Ryoko: …so then I said-- (Camera turns on.)
Weijia: Hello. It's time again for the evening news with Weijia and Ryoko.
Ryoko: Oh! Uh, hi!
Weijia: In recent news, OU beat Texas 1,000 to 0.
Ryoko: Go OU!
Weijia: Yaaaay!
Ryoko: More on that later. Now it's time for my favorite part of the show: Consumer Reports!
Stupid Person #1: That's your favorite part? Man, you're stoopid.
Ryoko: Uh, it's spelled "stupid."
S.P. #1: Shut up!
Stupid People 1,2,3,4, and 5: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
Ryoko: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
S.P. #2: What're you gonna do about it?
Weijia: This should be interesting. Stick around, folks.
Ryoko: INUYASHA!
Inuyasha: (Walks out calmly.)
S.P. #1: Oh please. You're gonna sic that pansy on us?
Inuyasha: (Cracks his knuckles.)
S.P. #1-5: (Running.) Aaaaaaaaa!
Inuyasha: (Chasing them.) That's right, you better run. (Jumps and lands on them.)
Ryoko: Yay!
Weijia: That's all the time we have for tonight--
Ryoko: (Frowns.) No Consumer Reports?
Weijia: (Sighs) Fine. Hanyos are a very good investment.
Ryoko: Yeah!
Weijia: Join us again next time for the evening news. (Music plays and you hear running, screaming, and crashing in the background.)
Fic #4
Ryoko: This is so much fun!
Inuyasha: Why do you do this?! (Has bows and curlers in his hair.)
Ryoko: But your hair is so long and pretty.
Inuyasha: (Shakes everything out of his hair.) I'm running away. (Packs suitcase.)
Ryoko: But-- (Eyes get all big and teary.) But why? (Starts crying.)
Inuyasha: Oh, no. That won't work this time. (Runs toward the door.)
Ryoko: (Face goes back to normal.) Fine. If that's the way you want to play it. SIT!
Inuyasha: Hey! (Falls.)
Ryoko: (Drags him back to the chair.) Now stay there and let me finish your hair. (Starts putting curlers in his hair.)
Inuyasha: Why me?
Ryoko: I heard that!
Fic #5
Inuyasha: (Picks up script for "Blithe Spirit.") What's this?
Ryoko: It's the play I'm in.
Inuyasha: Who do you play? I'll bet you're Elvira. She seems sweet, funny, and evil, just like you.
Ryoko: Um…actually I'm the person backstage that helps with the props and stuff.
Inuyasha: What a gyp. I say we lock whoever plays Elvira in a closet. No one will find her until after the show's over.
Ryoko: (Stares at him.) You've been watching "I Love Lucy" reruns again, haven't you?
Inuyasha: I refuse to answer on the grounds that Ricky has such a weird accent.
Ryoko: Whatever. Just make sure you turn it off before "Jerry Springer comes on. If there's anything we don't need, it's for you to learn more "new words."
Inuyasha: What the do you mean?
Ryoko: OO All right, no more TV for you!
Fic #6
Inuyasha: So Ryoko--
Ryoko: Shhh! I'm takeing a test!
Inuyasha: What for?
Ryoko: It's a suggestion of what we do when we grow up.
Inuyasha: (Takes someone else's test and begins filling it out.)
Next April
Ryoko: They're here! They're here!
Inuyasha: Huh? What's here? (Gets up from the couch where he fell asleep.)
Ryoko: The results from that test we took a few months ago. Remember? It was to see what career we should have.
Inuyasha: (Blinks.) But we already have careers. You're the first 14 year old girl to have written 8 best-sellers, and I'm…a hanyo. That's sort of a career, right?
Ryoko: Uh, sure. Anyway, let's see what it says. (Opens letters.) Mine says I should be a writer. Well, duh! Let's see what yours says. (Looks at it.) Huh. How odd. How very, very odd. Look at what yours says.
Inuyasha: What?! What's it say?! (Now awake enough to use exclamation points.)
Ryoko: According to this, you should be a computer programmer.
Inuyasha: A computer programmer? How?! Really?! (Thinks for a moment.) Hey, Ryoko? What's a computer?
Ryoko: (Face falls.) (Gets back up.) (Explains computers to him.)
Inuyasha: Oh. Well, I don't know how to program that. I can't even program a VCR timer, for that matter.
Ryoko: No, really? I couldn't have guessed. (Sarcastic.)
Inuyasha: Maybe I should learn more about this computer of which you speak.
Ryoko: If you lay one hand on my computer, I'll-- (Chases him.)
The End
A/N- Did you like them? I wrote them and more last school year (8th grade) for my friends, who used to beg me to write more. (I'm not bragging. Would I do that?) I said that most of my stories would be humorous, so here ya go! I've got whole stories like this, so review and I'll post them. It's that simple! So remember, the authoress is holding her breath until you review, and you wouldn't want the authoress to suffocate, would you? (Big smile.)