"Holy shit!" Nick Stokes screamed at his TV. "How the hell did this happen?" You see, Nick had been sitting at home, watching the Lakers- Mavericks game when all of a sudden, the team's star player was mauled to the ground and bleeding all over the court. His team blew it; they were out of the finals for sure. Amazingly enough, as his best friend lie dying on his kitchen floor, the biggest issue that Nick faced was how he could talk to Warrick after the tragic turn of tonight's game. Well, it can't be said that Nick didn't think about Greg, because seconds after the horrific turn of the night's basketball game, he called Greg, but when no one picked up, he became slightly worried.
"Hey, this is Greg. Leave a message and I'll get back to ya. Eventually."
"Greg, it's Nick. Pick up the damn phone. I know you're there; you wouldn't miss a Lakers/Mavericks game. Greg? Greg?? Alright, fine. Since you won't answer me, I'm coming over there. You better answer the fucking door. Bye"
Nick grabbed his keys off the counter and walked out to his Tahoe, now a little more than slightly worried. But he drove slowly, cautious as always, while Greg was bleeding out, clinging on to life.
Although he hated to admit it, he felt kind of stupid just showing up at Greg's door because he wouldn't answer the phone, but, worst case scenario, he wouldn't be home and everything would be fine. He was hesitant in rushing up the stairs to his apartment, so he took his time. And when no one answered Greg's door, he was thoroughly humiliated. He turned to leave, but before he could even take one step in the other direction, he noticed Greg's car, parked in the lot below. Nick turned back and started banging on the door. No answer. Now that he was officially in panic and minor things like trespassing did not bother him, he tried Greg's doorknob. The door opened. Nick walked into the room slowly while shouting Greg's name. Every time he visited Greg's, he was amazed by the cleanliness of his house and while he was searching for Greg in his living room/ kitchen he realized nothing was out of place, which eliminated his first theory of robbery. Maybe he was just jumping to conclusions, maybe Greg would walk through that door seconds later and inform Nick that he was just at the grocery store or something. But with every millisecond he spent in that apartment, his suspicions grew; he knew Greg hadn't run out to do errands. The television in the corner was playing the game, so Greg had been here to watch it.
Nick turned his head toward the kitchen; he was positive he heard something coming from that direction but the counter was blocking his view. Quietly and carefully, he tiptoed toward the kitchen. As he circled the counter top, his eyes fell upon the motionless, still form of Greg and Nick gasped at the image before him. Greg was collapsed on the hard tile floor and a pool of blood was forming around him. Stab wounds were evident on his exposed chest and a blood covered knife lay beside him. Nick took out his cell phone, his routine in these situations immediately kicked in.
"This is CSI Nick Stokes. I need an ambulance at 109 Serenity Street as soon as possible."
"Alright sir, an ambulance is on its way"
He knelt down beside Greg's lifeless form; he was so pale, he already looked dead. It was then when Nick discovered the note sticking out of his pocket. He reached down, picked it up, and slowly began to read it.
"I just couldn't take it anymore."
And that was it. No explanation, no apologies, nothing.
Catherine Willows rushed down the hospital halls; the sound of her steps echoed down the hall, making Nick, who was sitting in a chair in the ICU waiting room, look up in her direction. She immediately noticed he'd been crying. She took the chair beside him and started rubbing his back in what she thought to be a comforting way. Nick faced her, a wry grin on his face.
"After all of the hundreds of cases I've seen, all the emergency situations I've been in, you would think it would make seeing him like that so much easier. You just never-", he stopped as his voice broke. "You never expect it to be someone you know."
Catherine was at a loss for words. "We'll find the bastard who did this to him."
"Catherine, Greg has fourteen stab wounds, fourteen self inflicted stab wounds."
"Oh, God." Composing herself a few minutes later, she continued their conversation.
"How is he?"
"He's alive-for now. The doctor said he missed puncturing most of his organs, but he nicked his left lung, causing it to collapse. Other than that, there's only the amount of blood loss to worry about."
She nodded. "I didn't even see it coming".
"I don't think anyone did".
"Have you called his family?"
"They're dead."
"Oh. Well, have you called Grissom and Warrick?"
"Yes, along with Brass"
"What about Sara?"
"Not yet."
"I think she has a right to know"
"Alright" And with that he stood up and walked to the pay phone, which was down the hall and around the corner. He wasn't sure where his cell phone was; he must have lost it in the confusion. The entire night was a blur. He couldn't fathom what would drive Greg to do this. He was Greg's best friend and he had no idea that he was having such a hard time in life that he would rather kill himself than live another day going what he went through. Nick didn't understand; he couldn't understand what would drive him to this. But he knew, that, despite how hard he might try, he could never forget seeing Greg like he saw him tonight- collapsed in a heap on the floor, pale and lifeless, with tearstains on his cheeks and stab wounds in his chest.
"Sidle"
"Sara? It's Nick."
"Hey Nick. Are you at work?"
"Um, no."
" I was actually going to call you today. I needed Greg's home number."
"Really? Why?"
"I really didn't get a chance to tell him goodbye".
"Actually, I'm calling about Greg." Nick sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought. "Sara, there was…an accident."
"What? What happened to him?"
"He was stabbed. Fourteen times."
"By who?"
"A man by the name of Greg Sanders."
"Are you saying…?"
Catherine ran down the hall, calling out to him.
"Nick, the doctor wants to talk to us."
"Sara, I've got to go. I'll call you back later."
"But Nick-" She was cut off by the humming of the dial tone in her ear and left with so many unanswered questions.
Hey you, see me, pictures crazy,
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
I've got, nothing, to gain, to lose,
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore.
Hey you, are me, not so pretty,
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
Silent my voice, I've got no choice
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore
Hey you, see me, pictures crazy,
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
I've got, nothing, to gain, to lose,
All the world I've seen before me passing by,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore,
You don't care about how I feel,
I don't feel it anymore
I don't sleep, anymore,
I don't eat, anymore,
I don't live, anymore
I don't feel.
AN: Ok, here it is, the long author's note that I've been planning to write since day one. I am going to thank my reviewers and respond to some of the comments they made. First off, I want to thank you all for the amazing support you have given to this story. Personally, I think it sucks, but the great reviews are what keep me writing. I want to thank Scarlet Rose 4 for the best review ever! That review made me feel like I was showing the point I wanted to get across and that people could identify with my story. And next to A Bloom, who has been the first one to review every chapter so far: You brought up a point in one review about the title. I chose the agony of a stalker because Greg feels as if he is just sitting on the sidelines, watching Sara, never approaching her. He feels like he is wrong for doing so, like he's stalking her. Ok, next is Greggo's Girl. I didn't feel as if last chapter was a "false ending" because it was my ending. I was kind of proud of the way I wrote the end of it, going in between the basketball game and Greg. That is where I wanted to end it, but I knew if I did, I would make all of you reviews upset. So I decided that if I was going to continue this story, even though I wanted to stop, I was going to have to get a lot of feedback. I am writing two other stories under a different category that I spend hours writing the chapters for and, once they are posted, get like one review for a chapter. It hurts to work so hard on something and get no feedback at all. I know your review was not a flame, but to all of you out there who want to flame me, you can. I have absolutely no self confidence- there is nothing you can say about this story that I haven't thought of before. Now to Paints The Sky: I was surprised to see your review and realize that you had suggested the next chapter to be exactly as I had written it. That was pretty cool.
I also want to say that I have read a lot of stories by most of you who reviewed: A Bloom, Scarlet Rose 4, Paints the Sky, Coffee Luv, Rainbowsnstars (I love your story Will you Wait for Me, it's on my favorites list), Sandersgirl, bugsandbeauty- the list goes on. I really admire that you talented writers actually like my story.
Alright, now, in closing, the song from the last chapter was With This Knife by Smile Empty Soul and the one in this chapter is ATWA by System of a Down. All of the songs used in this fic are quiet, calm songs by not necessarily calm, quiet bands. They are all great songs and I recommend you download them.
PLEASE REVIEW!