Severus Snape a project for a year
Disclaimer.. All characters known and recognised are the works of the mind of J.K.Rowling, as with known magical terms, any unknown folk and terms from the muggle world are either mine or that person described.
This is a story from a girls point of view, in her seventh year at Hogwarts she plans to find a challenging man and turn him into her dream guy and have him fall for her by the end of the year, with many humorous results and phrases please read, review and enjoy!! My precious friends.
Chapter 1 The Plan for the One.
Why do we constantly put ourselves through this daily torture, wake up, drag ourselves down the stairs to our smoke filled kitchen, my mother has burnt the toast again, the coffee pot is over flowing and my brother screams in my ear after his lost gym socks which have not been washed also again. My father sits holding the paper up to his face generally ignoring the riotous din going on around him, his face a picture of tranquillity as if his mind is off laying on a beach in the Bahamas somewhere while his body rests on the scrubbed pine which is our kitchen table. Perfectly normal a normal Hull family well minus a screaming baby and a bottle blond aunt struggling in with a huge pram lined with tins of beans at 5 pence a can from the local Jacksons. We are lucky there are 7 of them down this street, my aunt has her own home in the west of the city, an old dark tower (well it is tall) with subsidence in the walls. IM sure you with an extremely well trained mind will know that we may not be well what you call normal, and to the extremely nosey old peoples home at the bottom of the street we are 'Extremely odd not like in our day we knew every bodies business up and down the street, we knew when anything happened to old Madge or Janet in the butchers'. They are extremely put out by the fact that they know nothing of what happens in our house and we intend to keep it that way. We are not a typical family; we are completely the opposite especially in our little street we are of the magical nature. We are witches and wizards! My father works in the ministry of magic, he is senior control officer to the managing of overactive magical objects, also known as a party pooper, a fun stopper, the sort of person who rules out jet packed broomsticks due to a few old muggle women (non magic folk) getting hold of them and trying to sweep the floor, but instead of doing so they find themselves hung on to the washing line amongst old bloomers. Swearing that the broom was out of sorts, and not in the mood to sweep which any idiot could see was not the truth when the broom has gone soaring at 50 miles an hour down the street eventually crashing into a trolley at the local superstore. My mother is a teacher at a muggle school, I complete waste of her magical talents in my opinion but she says she "likes the best of both worlds". My brother wants to a be a muggle footballer and play for Watford united, he takes after my mother in a strange way, but he's not to bad all round besides being a bloke.
And me Rebecca Wendell 17 years of age student at the divine school of Hogwarts school of witchcraft and Wizardry, Elton John music lover, book worm and a friend of the school, I love my school every day is an adventure and believe me many have come our way. IM a proud member of the Gryffindor house and a potions lover, makes me wonder if I was put in the correct house, potions appears to be a Slytherin thing, but I don't doubt some higher influence has been put their way by the formidable potions master Professor Severus Snape. All round bad guy and Slytherin lover.
Well as I was asking why do we torture ourselves to look good in such a strange society, the reason Men, Blokes, boys, hehehe. My topic for the year the opposite sex, this year IM going to find a man and keep him, but IM not going to go for a pimp (women chaser and not a one woman man) no nobody easy I want a challenge to make the chase more fun, iv'e always liked dark men and there are plenty of them in the wizarding world.
So here's the plan
1. SELF ASSESMENT.
Upon raiding my wardrobe I find muggle clothing, very nice in the muggle world, completely no use in Hogwarts as IM covered by black robes and wearing a black pointed hat at special occasional dinners which reek havoc with your hair. My wizarding clothes consist of a Lovely black robe, hmm another lovely black robe and what's this another lovely black robe, well it seems as if I own lots of lovely black robes, oh wait I stand corrected a black and green robe, well extremely seductive first stop Diagon Alley and Madame Malkins.
Madame Malkins
Upon arriving at the witches clothing store I find the robes I am wearing are covered in dirt, a hate travelling by floo powder, as soon as I am able to apperate I will do to save some face and the dry cleaning bill. Madame Malkin is a squat little witch, dolled up to the nines in silver jewellery and magenta robes, old fashioned in my opinion but they were probably the height of fashion in her day. I searched the room; there were many different styles and the good old lovely black robe, but nothing of a sexy seductive nature, so I ended up crawling to Madame Malkin for help. Her advice was 'wear a vest'. Well now IM full of thoughts wear a vest. I searched the store again, at the back I came across a small select rack bearing low cut robes in various colours, why had I failed to notice this my first time round, raking through the rack, my searching hand came across a soft robe made of Emerald green silk, not dull but quite a beautiful colour, it was low cut and stylishly shaped. I lifted it into the dressing room and pulled it on over my head. For once my eyes filled with tears, I didn't look bad, I stepped out of the dressing room and Madame Malkin looked at me. "Beautiful lass beautiful" she said in her cockney drawl, I laughed.
Diagon Alley the wizarding worlds shopping mall in one street, people swarmed like flies up and down the cobbled streets conversating loudly with each other over the prices of books and potion ingredients, general gossip floated through the air, One particular rumour which caught my attention was of the supposed return of Gilderoy Lockhart who now called himself Armandi and roamed the streets giving out advice to the general public on how to capture the man of your dreams, it also appeared that Armandi was a gay man who made his living by cross dressing and singing in the pubs, a program of Marilyn Monroe hits accompanied by his dancing monkey, talk about a bad knock on the head, but you don't know what goes on within the 4 walls now do you.
Floreane Fortscues ice cream parlour danced in front of me like a shiny new sickle, but IM watching my weight no one wants a blob in a school uniform, but a small one couldn't hurt. "Rebecca" came a voice from under one of the orange and yellow umbrellas an impression of sun but really just a clash on sensitive sight. Hermione Granger sat underneath the umbrella waving with her friend Ron Weasley. Well boyfriend id bet my last knut on it, like she'd never admit it she knows she likes him, and he likes her, they would never say to each other but its as obvious as an elephant in an elevator, I wish they'd hurry up and admit it. "Hey Rebecca ready for school", Hermione asked ever the enquirer. "Yep can't wait", I replied "and how are you Ronnie babes" "Cool Rebecca, I've spoken to Harry he's. Oh here we go Harry bleeding Potter the great the marvellous, the boy who lived. Humph, its my opinion that the boy who lived did that for a reason to live, yet all he does is run after Dumbledore iv'e yet to see him have fun or chase a girl, if he doesn't he'll be Gilderoy Lockhart's next best mate with no exceptions. We chatted for a while until I had to leave, my train was due and IM not in the mood for using floo powder again not with my new robes.
Upon arriving home I stood in front of my mirror in my new robe On with Phase 2 of my plan for the man of my dreams I have to find him next.
Disclaimer.. All characters known and recognised are the works of the mind of J.K.Rowling, as with known magical terms, any unknown folk and terms from the muggle world are either mine or that person described.
This is a story from a girls point of view, in her seventh year at Hogwarts she plans to find a challenging man and turn him into her dream guy and have him fall for her by the end of the year, with many humorous results and phrases please read, review and enjoy!! My precious friends.
Chapter 1 The Plan for the One.
Why do we constantly put ourselves through this daily torture, wake up, drag ourselves down the stairs to our smoke filled kitchen, my mother has burnt the toast again, the coffee pot is over flowing and my brother screams in my ear after his lost gym socks which have not been washed also again. My father sits holding the paper up to his face generally ignoring the riotous din going on around him, his face a picture of tranquillity as if his mind is off laying on a beach in the Bahamas somewhere while his body rests on the scrubbed pine which is our kitchen table. Perfectly normal a normal Hull family well minus a screaming baby and a bottle blond aunt struggling in with a huge pram lined with tins of beans at 5 pence a can from the local Jacksons. We are lucky there are 7 of them down this street, my aunt has her own home in the west of the city, an old dark tower (well it is tall) with subsidence in the walls. IM sure you with an extremely well trained mind will know that we may not be well what you call normal, and to the extremely nosey old peoples home at the bottom of the street we are 'Extremely odd not like in our day we knew every bodies business up and down the street, we knew when anything happened to old Madge or Janet in the butchers'. They are extremely put out by the fact that they know nothing of what happens in our house and we intend to keep it that way. We are not a typical family; we are completely the opposite especially in our little street we are of the magical nature. We are witches and wizards! My father works in the ministry of magic, he is senior control officer to the managing of overactive magical objects, also known as a party pooper, a fun stopper, the sort of person who rules out jet packed broomsticks due to a few old muggle women (non magic folk) getting hold of them and trying to sweep the floor, but instead of doing so they find themselves hung on to the washing line amongst old bloomers. Swearing that the broom was out of sorts, and not in the mood to sweep which any idiot could see was not the truth when the broom has gone soaring at 50 miles an hour down the street eventually crashing into a trolley at the local superstore. My mother is a teacher at a muggle school, I complete waste of her magical talents in my opinion but she says she "likes the best of both worlds". My brother wants to a be a muggle footballer and play for Watford united, he takes after my mother in a strange way, but he's not to bad all round besides being a bloke.
And me Rebecca Wendell 17 years of age student at the divine school of Hogwarts school of witchcraft and Wizardry, Elton John music lover, book worm and a friend of the school, I love my school every day is an adventure and believe me many have come our way. IM a proud member of the Gryffindor house and a potions lover, makes me wonder if I was put in the correct house, potions appears to be a Slytherin thing, but I don't doubt some higher influence has been put their way by the formidable potions master Professor Severus Snape. All round bad guy and Slytherin lover.
Well as I was asking why do we torture ourselves to look good in such a strange society, the reason Men, Blokes, boys, hehehe. My topic for the year the opposite sex, this year IM going to find a man and keep him, but IM not going to go for a pimp (women chaser and not a one woman man) no nobody easy I want a challenge to make the chase more fun, iv'e always liked dark men and there are plenty of them in the wizarding world.
So here's the plan
1. SELF ASSESMENT.
Upon raiding my wardrobe I find muggle clothing, very nice in the muggle world, completely no use in Hogwarts as IM covered by black robes and wearing a black pointed hat at special occasional dinners which reek havoc with your hair. My wizarding clothes consist of a Lovely black robe, hmm another lovely black robe and what's this another lovely black robe, well it seems as if I own lots of lovely black robes, oh wait I stand corrected a black and green robe, well extremely seductive first stop Diagon Alley and Madame Malkins.
Madame Malkins
Upon arriving at the witches clothing store I find the robes I am wearing are covered in dirt, a hate travelling by floo powder, as soon as I am able to apperate I will do to save some face and the dry cleaning bill. Madame Malkin is a squat little witch, dolled up to the nines in silver jewellery and magenta robes, old fashioned in my opinion but they were probably the height of fashion in her day. I searched the room; there were many different styles and the good old lovely black robe, but nothing of a sexy seductive nature, so I ended up crawling to Madame Malkin for help. Her advice was 'wear a vest'. Well now IM full of thoughts wear a vest. I searched the store again, at the back I came across a small select rack bearing low cut robes in various colours, why had I failed to notice this my first time round, raking through the rack, my searching hand came across a soft robe made of Emerald green silk, not dull but quite a beautiful colour, it was low cut and stylishly shaped. I lifted it into the dressing room and pulled it on over my head. For once my eyes filled with tears, I didn't look bad, I stepped out of the dressing room and Madame Malkin looked at me. "Beautiful lass beautiful" she said in her cockney drawl, I laughed.
Diagon Alley the wizarding worlds shopping mall in one street, people swarmed like flies up and down the cobbled streets conversating loudly with each other over the prices of books and potion ingredients, general gossip floated through the air, One particular rumour which caught my attention was of the supposed return of Gilderoy Lockhart who now called himself Armandi and roamed the streets giving out advice to the general public on how to capture the man of your dreams, it also appeared that Armandi was a gay man who made his living by cross dressing and singing in the pubs, a program of Marilyn Monroe hits accompanied by his dancing monkey, talk about a bad knock on the head, but you don't know what goes on within the 4 walls now do you.
Floreane Fortscues ice cream parlour danced in front of me like a shiny new sickle, but IM watching my weight no one wants a blob in a school uniform, but a small one couldn't hurt. "Rebecca" came a voice from under one of the orange and yellow umbrellas an impression of sun but really just a clash on sensitive sight. Hermione Granger sat underneath the umbrella waving with her friend Ron Weasley. Well boyfriend id bet my last knut on it, like she'd never admit it she knows she likes him, and he likes her, they would never say to each other but its as obvious as an elephant in an elevator, I wish they'd hurry up and admit it. "Hey Rebecca ready for school", Hermione asked ever the enquirer. "Yep can't wait", I replied "and how are you Ronnie babes" "Cool Rebecca, I've spoken to Harry he's. Oh here we go Harry bleeding Potter the great the marvellous, the boy who lived. Humph, its my opinion that the boy who lived did that for a reason to live, yet all he does is run after Dumbledore iv'e yet to see him have fun or chase a girl, if he doesn't he'll be Gilderoy Lockhart's next best mate with no exceptions. We chatted for a while until I had to leave, my train was due and IM not in the mood for using floo powder again not with my new robes.
Upon arriving home I stood in front of my mirror in my new robe On with Phase 2 of my plan for the man of my dreams I have to find him next.