Chapter 5, the many faces of me!
Now onward we go with the master (Mistress) stage of my plan, well one of them there are many more to come I assure you, unless Snape is a complete push over when it comes to women... Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, YEAH RIGHT!
A tiny invention I am going to use may be one you have heard of, called clothing/fashion, the ability to dress in a manner in which you wish to please either someone else or your self. Now you and I both know Snapes er hem! (clears throat) sense of dress, which is reminiscent of the 1900's and consists of an assembly of. well. erm. a black robe hmm.maybe he would like my wardrobe. I need a style (Woah wait I do have style), but I need to experiment with some other sophisticated and unsophisticated styles of the world, ( this is the genius bit) I then therefore find out which style Snape prefers and I can adapt to suit that style and will be on my way to making him mine, watch my luck I bet he likes the more natural look to a woman, (I REFUSE TO DO THAT).
The First style- Baggy clothes (i.e. He was a skater boy) I have adapted to look like a skater, baggy trousers a baseball cap turned backwards, a tie hanging loosely around my neck and a string vest. I have extremely dark eye make up and am carrying a skate board (as I have not mastered the basics of staying on the board). I really don't know how im going to get away with this, but I have never heard of any punishment being given to people who break the 'Dress code'. Upon walking into breakfast, I had every eye in the place on me, except Snapes who appeared to be enjoying a rather fine looking kipper, I don't even have him for potions today so I cannot force him to look at me, or even make a comment. Professor McGonnagal, after viewing my outfit and giving me a good look over suggested I go see Madame Pomfrey, with my ailments...... (what ailments?)
I am now back in my dormitory considering another style.. punk?
Great I look like a rainbow, my style of pointed purple hair, rainbow clothes, hobnail boots and a giant silver ring through my nose makes me look like something from the seventies heavy metal, rocking. My venture this far got me no further than out of the common room, the fat lady portrait began screaming when she saw me, she thought I was a mad man, some how the mad man look doesn't seem to appeal to anyone including me.
My third style 18th century big wig look.
It is exactly that, I have a huge wig, all white curls, a long dress of pink silk and pink cheeks, I look like I would have fitted in at Elton John's 50th birthday party, all big wigs, however I can move without the aid of a furniture truck and greek helpers in togas. God it's awkward trying to walk in this wig and gown, but it has to be done, (whoops it appears as if I have missed morning classes) oh well I'll say I was at the hospital wing. It is lunch time already; I'll go and make an impression.
Entering the great hall again to the silent reception again, I don't think people have quite gotten over my first appearance this morning as a Avril Lavigne lookalike, staring at me like IM demented, IM only taking off the Georgians, actually Snape is looking, he has a look on his face which either says (as IM not sure)
You are a sexy little vixen in your little (well long) pink gown and your extremely large wig, you really turn me on....
Or.
You weirdo, what do you think you are doing I would not touch you dressed like that with a 10 foot wand with a dragon on the end.
I reckon the second one what about you?
On to my last resort, I don't believe Snape has responded to any of my outfits and I'll be damned if I have to try any more of the extravagant styles, so im going to try a muggle one which has won prizes, the simply as low and as short as possible style, the just crawled out of bed and just forgot to put anything suitably covering on. Out comes my shortest skirt and lowest top.
The next day.
Up at 6.00 am, got a shower, can't be doing to smell like a barn, dried hair, as a cold often offends, styled hair in large curls (not El Vira or Vera Lynn I assure you) but curly enough, equipped with my short black mini skirt, and low cut red vest top, silk and tight I assure you again, and a pair of knee length boots, now I know I may look like something which has stepped out of 21st Century Moulin Rouge, but I assure you this does mostly work, if it does not then I think your fella may be on the other bus, unless he likes dull and boring. Stepping down the stairs from the dormitories, I got many looks from the boys of Gryffindor and many many nasty jealous looks from the girls, girls are the worst at times, they needn't worry im not after their blokes, Christ I don't think I have any competition besides Snapes stubbornness.
Walking along the corridor, hm hm lala la la (cast a nasty look) lalala, (hair flick), do be do (hitch skirt up) hehe lolo la (pull top down) Oh little Jeanie (drop wand oops how impossible) IM so in love with (bend over pick up wand) you (turn to have a whole corridor staring at me), YES! RESULT! Onwards to breakfast.
Great hall doors open, (cast a modelling smile) walk in (swishing hips) hehehe (evil laugh) amazing how much respect a short skirt commands, Give a Gryffindor lad a smile, he falls over moving so I can sit down and lands with his face in the porridge Oh dear ! (Hahahahhaha) cast a glance around the hall and find to my dismay Snape is no where to be seen, well what a God damn waste of time. Well never mind I have potions in a couple of hours.
In a couple of hours.
Okay remind me never to wear a short skirt to Professor Binn's class again, if he wasn't dead I fear he may have had a heart attack and died, he looked ready to, he gave me a lecture, on how he never dressed like that in his days.. I should hope not!
Potions now I can feel the excitement coursing through my veins like a giant stampede of cows, or could it just be Malfoys girlfriend clattering around my blood stream, Down the stairs cockling around in my boots (Don't fall) through the door and to my seat (Phew did not fall) Extraordinarily lucky for me, sit down and skirt goes up, a lad accidentally on purpose drops a piece of parchment conveniently under my desk and has to retrieve it, icky pervert! Can't a girl flaunt herself without getting perved on.. the answer my dear women of the world is NO!
Sit further on my seat and wait for Snape to come in. here he is in his usual Arnie Schwarzenegger way (not!), he begins his ramblings without looking my way, he writes the work, without looking at me, he explains the potion without looking at me, he picks up the potions bottle and ............... Sees Me! (yippee)..... wait he has dropped the bottle and the room is filling with smoke, damn!
Outside the green smoke filled class room.
I have a cough now and Snape is a gibbering wreak, he just looks at me then looks for his bottle, he doesn't seem to realise that he has dropped it or the fact that he is outside of the dungeon and. oh great he has fainted, I have broken the man of my dreams by my own provocative method, I'd best get Madame Pomfrey I don't reckon anyone else will bother, if I don't my fun ends here.
Gryffindor tower, 30 minutes later.
Have had news from Madame Pomfrey, Snape is recovering well and can speak again and he wishes to see me, oh no this cannot be good. Upon walking into the dungeon (smoke free) I find Snape sat at his desk, staring aimlessly at the back wall, as if it were so appetising dessert, great what have I done? "Professor, you wished to see me", I said looking him up and down whilst he turned to me. "Miss Wendell", he said "I would just like to say" (at this point he winced) "Thank you for going to get Madame Pomfrey" WOAH is he thanking me, maybe I have turned his mind funny oh God what I have done. "Sir I" I began but I got no further. he was coming very close to me and my face (oh God) "That outfit Miss Wendell" he said I could feel his breath on my face, his lips so close.
"NEVER WEAR IT AGAIN!" he shouted I must have jumped a mile in the air, completely lost of his trance, gathering myself I did a runner as fast as I could from the room, finally collapsing on a staircase.
Wow!!!!!!
Now onward we go with the master (Mistress) stage of my plan, well one of them there are many more to come I assure you, unless Snape is a complete push over when it comes to women... Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, YEAH RIGHT!
A tiny invention I am going to use may be one you have heard of, called clothing/fashion, the ability to dress in a manner in which you wish to please either someone else or your self. Now you and I both know Snapes er hem! (clears throat) sense of dress, which is reminiscent of the 1900's and consists of an assembly of. well. erm. a black robe hmm.maybe he would like my wardrobe. I need a style (Woah wait I do have style), but I need to experiment with some other sophisticated and unsophisticated styles of the world, ( this is the genius bit) I then therefore find out which style Snape prefers and I can adapt to suit that style and will be on my way to making him mine, watch my luck I bet he likes the more natural look to a woman, (I REFUSE TO DO THAT).
The First style- Baggy clothes (i.e. He was a skater boy) I have adapted to look like a skater, baggy trousers a baseball cap turned backwards, a tie hanging loosely around my neck and a string vest. I have extremely dark eye make up and am carrying a skate board (as I have not mastered the basics of staying on the board). I really don't know how im going to get away with this, but I have never heard of any punishment being given to people who break the 'Dress code'. Upon walking into breakfast, I had every eye in the place on me, except Snapes who appeared to be enjoying a rather fine looking kipper, I don't even have him for potions today so I cannot force him to look at me, or even make a comment. Professor McGonnagal, after viewing my outfit and giving me a good look over suggested I go see Madame Pomfrey, with my ailments...... (what ailments?)
I am now back in my dormitory considering another style.. punk?
Great I look like a rainbow, my style of pointed purple hair, rainbow clothes, hobnail boots and a giant silver ring through my nose makes me look like something from the seventies heavy metal, rocking. My venture this far got me no further than out of the common room, the fat lady portrait began screaming when she saw me, she thought I was a mad man, some how the mad man look doesn't seem to appeal to anyone including me.
My third style 18th century big wig look.
It is exactly that, I have a huge wig, all white curls, a long dress of pink silk and pink cheeks, I look like I would have fitted in at Elton John's 50th birthday party, all big wigs, however I can move without the aid of a furniture truck and greek helpers in togas. God it's awkward trying to walk in this wig and gown, but it has to be done, (whoops it appears as if I have missed morning classes) oh well I'll say I was at the hospital wing. It is lunch time already; I'll go and make an impression.
Entering the great hall again to the silent reception again, I don't think people have quite gotten over my first appearance this morning as a Avril Lavigne lookalike, staring at me like IM demented, IM only taking off the Georgians, actually Snape is looking, he has a look on his face which either says (as IM not sure)
You are a sexy little vixen in your little (well long) pink gown and your extremely large wig, you really turn me on....
Or.
You weirdo, what do you think you are doing I would not touch you dressed like that with a 10 foot wand with a dragon on the end.
I reckon the second one what about you?
On to my last resort, I don't believe Snape has responded to any of my outfits and I'll be damned if I have to try any more of the extravagant styles, so im going to try a muggle one which has won prizes, the simply as low and as short as possible style, the just crawled out of bed and just forgot to put anything suitably covering on. Out comes my shortest skirt and lowest top.
The next day.
Up at 6.00 am, got a shower, can't be doing to smell like a barn, dried hair, as a cold often offends, styled hair in large curls (not El Vira or Vera Lynn I assure you) but curly enough, equipped with my short black mini skirt, and low cut red vest top, silk and tight I assure you again, and a pair of knee length boots, now I know I may look like something which has stepped out of 21st Century Moulin Rouge, but I assure you this does mostly work, if it does not then I think your fella may be on the other bus, unless he likes dull and boring. Stepping down the stairs from the dormitories, I got many looks from the boys of Gryffindor and many many nasty jealous looks from the girls, girls are the worst at times, they needn't worry im not after their blokes, Christ I don't think I have any competition besides Snapes stubbornness.
Walking along the corridor, hm hm lala la la (cast a nasty look) lalala, (hair flick), do be do (hitch skirt up) hehe lolo la (pull top down) Oh little Jeanie (drop wand oops how impossible) IM so in love with (bend over pick up wand) you (turn to have a whole corridor staring at me), YES! RESULT! Onwards to breakfast.
Great hall doors open, (cast a modelling smile) walk in (swishing hips) hehehe (evil laugh) amazing how much respect a short skirt commands, Give a Gryffindor lad a smile, he falls over moving so I can sit down and lands with his face in the porridge Oh dear ! (Hahahahhaha) cast a glance around the hall and find to my dismay Snape is no where to be seen, well what a God damn waste of time. Well never mind I have potions in a couple of hours.
In a couple of hours.
Okay remind me never to wear a short skirt to Professor Binn's class again, if he wasn't dead I fear he may have had a heart attack and died, he looked ready to, he gave me a lecture, on how he never dressed like that in his days.. I should hope not!
Potions now I can feel the excitement coursing through my veins like a giant stampede of cows, or could it just be Malfoys girlfriend clattering around my blood stream, Down the stairs cockling around in my boots (Don't fall) through the door and to my seat (Phew did not fall) Extraordinarily lucky for me, sit down and skirt goes up, a lad accidentally on purpose drops a piece of parchment conveniently under my desk and has to retrieve it, icky pervert! Can't a girl flaunt herself without getting perved on.. the answer my dear women of the world is NO!
Sit further on my seat and wait for Snape to come in. here he is in his usual Arnie Schwarzenegger way (not!), he begins his ramblings without looking my way, he writes the work, without looking at me, he explains the potion without looking at me, he picks up the potions bottle and ............... Sees Me! (yippee)..... wait he has dropped the bottle and the room is filling with smoke, damn!
Outside the green smoke filled class room.
I have a cough now and Snape is a gibbering wreak, he just looks at me then looks for his bottle, he doesn't seem to realise that he has dropped it or the fact that he is outside of the dungeon and. oh great he has fainted, I have broken the man of my dreams by my own provocative method, I'd best get Madame Pomfrey I don't reckon anyone else will bother, if I don't my fun ends here.
Gryffindor tower, 30 minutes later.
Have had news from Madame Pomfrey, Snape is recovering well and can speak again and he wishes to see me, oh no this cannot be good. Upon walking into the dungeon (smoke free) I find Snape sat at his desk, staring aimlessly at the back wall, as if it were so appetising dessert, great what have I done? "Professor, you wished to see me", I said looking him up and down whilst he turned to me. "Miss Wendell", he said "I would just like to say" (at this point he winced) "Thank you for going to get Madame Pomfrey" WOAH is he thanking me, maybe I have turned his mind funny oh God what I have done. "Sir I" I began but I got no further. he was coming very close to me and my face (oh God) "That outfit Miss Wendell" he said I could feel his breath on my face, his lips so close.
"NEVER WEAR IT AGAIN!" he shouted I must have jumped a mile in the air, completely lost of his trance, gathering myself I did a runner as fast as I could from the room, finally collapsing on a staircase.
Wow!!!!!!