This chapter is one with a song piece in it do the dance and sing if you
own the song, don't go breaking my heart, Snape's part is in normal type,
Rebecca's is in italic, Sorry for the delay I have been on work experience
and was to tired to do anything.
PS IM going to see the legend Elton John myself I can't wait!
Chapter 7 The Talent Contest
I woke up this morning to find my dormitory completely void of folk, oh not again not that damn cheap alarm clock, IM chucking it I swear and finding something decent. I roll over to find the alarm clock in complete and perfect working order, in fact it is only 7.00am, weird so where is everyone. I notice that all of .their pyjamas and nightgowns are all hung neatly up in the ward robe, unlike mine which are wrapped around me making me feel like an Egyptian mummy in a Sarcophagus. Pulling on my Mr Men dressing gown on over my bedclothes I dragged my corpse like body down the stairs and into the common room to find it flooded with people, all fully dressed and ready for the day. Oh dear it didn't take them long to notice me. Wolf Whistles and shouts of delight came my way along with a few 'Morning Sexy' and 'Ann Summers wear has got nothing on that dressing gown' remarks Bugger! I ran back up to my dormitory, red faced, my life is a facsimile of sham, a constant joke to everyone but me who is stuck with it. Now where are my robes?
Upon dressing in suitable attire and leaving the dormitory, I now find the common room empty 'What's going on around here' do you ever get the feeling your just lagging that bit behind at times. ooh what's that, a piece of gold paper lay upon the table glistening in an appealing way. I picked it up and squinted at the shimmering words, it read.
Talent Show Friday November 5th 7.00PM start All Welcome Originality required No Dancing monkeys will be admitted into the show as it is not original.
Ha-ha Lockhart/Armandi (whatever) The fifth of November, that's a week away, well just FYI us in plenty of time why don't you, didn't give us folk who have to develop talents in a week. I.E. ME! Today is Saturday and strangely enough, I am not plagued by my mother Wannabe Emily Tudor, I am however plagued with the thought of Snape, Where is he? What is he doing? Why hasn't he spoken to me? Answers to this probably are. In his room Washing his hair with expensive shampoo And he probably thinks IM insane.... I probably am
Now about this talent competition, what shall I do.?
Dance? Wait the last time I danced, I ended up knocking an entire rack of plates down whilst dancing to the Jackson Five in B&Q.
Spells? Nah! Not original enough, besides I never know what I might do.
Pull a rabbit out of a hat? Erm, I think I am allergic to rabbits and IM not pulling that owl/panther thing of Emily's out of a hat.
What was it that Sir Alex Ferguson the great and grey said to Mank United, he said Play to your strengths. Easy for him to say, all he ever did was sit at the side of the football pitch swinging his legs and shouting. 'Get it boys', 'Go for it boys' 'Hard on boys', like some demented leprechaun of merry old England. So what do I like doing the most? Singing. Who's my favourite singer? Elton John no question. What's my song? Don't go breaking my heart. That's it, cracked it, hit the steak on the head, I'll sing don't go breaking my heart by Elton John Perfect! Wait. that song is a duet, I will need a willing volunteer, or maybe not willing or a volunteer, hehehe I have a plan!
Stage one of the plan within a plan to quote Will Shakespeare.
Learn how to sing, and who sings don't go breaking my heart better than the man himself yes Sir Elton Hercules John. I need him, and all I need is a simple apparition spell oh this should be fun.
Empty Dormitory 7.00pm
Ready folks engage action sequence one, ACCIO ELTON JOHN! Hahahahahahaaha, and appearing in front of me is the man himself, his outfit a glimmer of glittering blue sequins, Versace and shining blue Versace glasses, his hair gel styled and face a look of confusion, I couldn't get over it. how funny is it to see your favourite pop star in front of you sat looking confused and lost. "Where am I" he asked "Errm" quick thinking. "It's a day dream, you are not really here, and you are at the MTV awards asleep you know how much you hate them" I announced. Actually strangely enough he seems pretty ok with that, he just sat looking at my hair, I felt it and it appeared to be sticking up, oops I flattened it, damn here we go again. After a while he asked "What do you want?" Ah now here we go IM gonna ask him right ok breath right. "Elton I need your help" "will you teach me to sing don't go breaking my heart as a duet for the school talent show, I must win it Elton please help me" I begged. He looked at me for a second and smiled his cheesy grin I had grown to love over the years. "I will help you Miss?" he asked "Wendell, Rebecca Wendell, huge fan" I replied all smiles. "To work then Miss Wendell" he said removing his glasses and wiping them, "I need a piano though". No problem for me a tiny piano, I mean I just conjured Elton John, okay one Yamaha Piano coming up.. ACCIO YAMAHA!...
Five minutes later.
I reckon I should have been more specific, Yamaha has come up with a Yamaha guitar, a Yamaha keyboard, a Yamaha drum kit, a Yamaha tambourine (didn't know there was one) but no Yamaha piano, Elton is watching me in awe, he appears to have stopped filing his nails to watch my mistake, right I'll try again ACCIO YAMAHA PIANO!...... this time it worked, wow what a piano, its shiny black and a grand one, Elton seems impressed and begins to sit and play, it think it is three blind mice, well I never. of all songs. Here we go then!
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton
I couldn't if I Stop! Shouted Elton, what, I thought I was good, obviously not.
"Your tone is all wrong it is too high go down an octave and
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton
I couldn't if I trie. I didn't get much further, he was at it again
"No! I didn't let Kiki Dee get away with singing like that, and she took a lot of work, sing lightly don't try to hard, let it flow, if you want to win you need to think like a genuine winner"
Again 2 3 4
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton ..................
4 hours later. I am a rocking singer, I am pure brilliance, step back, Gloria Gaynor, Whitney Houston and anybody else especially those recent manufactured bands there's a new singer in town. I have sent Elton back, to his massive mansion, he'll need more than one £1000 shopping trip to recover from teaching me, I think I was hard work, but it came to me in the end, however before he left he gave me his glasses to remember him by and to wear for the show, sweet isn't he!.
Next stage. Practising my spell.
Next my spell, for my spell to work properly I need a victim, who can I pick.hehehe wait maybe I'll kill two Yugoslavian owls with one stone. We have a spell which needs practising and one extremely annoying friend which needs to be disposed of in one way or another, so to business.....
Dormitory.
IM waiting for her she shouldn't be long she follows me everywhere anyway.... success, she has just walked through the door, a look of esteem on her face what's all that about, oh well won't be for long.
HEY! EMILY! SIFRONIUS!................IMENNTUS! Emily stopped dead in her tracks and stood completely still, a glazed look had come over her eyes her mouth hung open (catching flies Em), she stood completely motionless. "Emily, Em can you hear me" I asked. "Yes Master", came her reply. Wow what a result, a complete zombie, Frankenstein, a Mr Hyde, she is like Renfield to my Dracula, an Igor to My Doctor, A Michael Jackson to my cosmetic surgery, a complete slave, well I hope so. a test I think. "Emily sit down" She did, cool "Emily stand up and sit down again" She did so. Emily (evil grin) lick my shoes! Hahahahaaha spit and polish! Emily kiss........... Professor Dumbledore!... hey she's off, come on readers. Hahaha following my creation, walking along the corridor ignoring everyone who is speaking to her, staring straight ahead, making her way to the great hall, wait here he comes oh God... Emily walks up to Dumbledore and stops him. "Hello Miss Tudor what can I do for you" Dumbledore asks all smiles. Emily stares at him in a demented way..without warning she has just jumped up and just given Dumbledore a huge Smacker on the lips, I can't contain myself.any. haha longer..hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah Oh god oh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, never gonna hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha oh oh IM okay okay.hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Haha.hah.ahaha.ha.
Okay done, just had glass of water and a bar of chocolate am ok now, oh his face, oh the look, a look of complete shock, if I was him I wouldn't know how to react, he just said "Okay go have a lie down miss Tudor I think you may be ill" before walking off not looking where he was going and bumping into suits of armour which argue back in annoyance, things that do not penetrate Dumbledore's state as he heads for his office.
IM now back in the Gryffindor common room sitting resting my aching ribs from laughing, Emily is just looking at me, I wonder how long this is going to last.IM worried.it won't last long enough.
6.00PM Action Stations everyone
The talent contest is in an hour, I can't turn back now, and I have come so far, I mean I have learnt to sing, cast a difficult spell and ACCIO Elton John and other large pieces of Musical equipment, don't get scared now. I head along the darkened corridors, twisting and turning, back to the corridor I stumbled upon when I became (as a reviewer put it) a peeping Tomarina. By now you have probably guessed what I am up to if not, here it is I plan to make Snape an Elton John to my Kiki Dee, with that one spell, the hard bit is getting it on him.
Snapes Quarters. The dark mahogany wood door stands in front of my shaking form, I have just witness Snape go in, and the trouble will all be worth it in the end.I hope. ALOHOMORA! I whisper, the door opens silently, I see Snape sitting at a dark desk at the other side of the room his back to me poring over some documents. Tiptoeing up behind him I raise my wand. BANG! The door slams behind me, Snape swings round in a state of guilty alarm..ITS NOW OR NEVER... SIFRONIUS.IMENNTUS, I roar, a blinding flash of light and Snape sits zombie Nation style at my feet. "Severus" I ask "Yes master" he replies in the same way as Emily (but obviously in a high squeaky girl's voice, his own not like Emily). OH God Oh God I just put a teacher under a control spell. "Stand" I say my voice quaking slightly. He did so and stood completely stationary. Wow Professor Snape under my control, I could do anything with him, many things that are unmentionable in polite society but it would be false, soz to disappoint everybody, but I want the real thing, not a robot doing things their body is not doing freely. "Severus" I say "Listen, tonight you are performing on stage in the school talent show, we are dueting and we must win, We are singing don't go breaking my heart and you are Elton John I am Kiki Dee ok, you must play the piano and sing, do you understand me" "Yes master, I am Elton John I must sing and play the piano, to Don't go breaking my heart and must win" he replied monotonously. "With enthusiasm" I added. "With Enthusiasm" he repeated still a robot; hope his performance isn't as bad as his speech. "Severus go and put these on" I said holding up his costume. He just stood still, weird huh, is the spell going already. "Severus" No response "Elton" I tried "Yes Master" he answered. Great he thinks he really is Elton John and appears to only answer to Elton brill fan bloody tastic. "Elton" I said patiently "go and put these clothes on and I will meet you here in 30 minutes. He walked away slowly "And Elton, remove your old clothes first" "Yes master Kiki" Lucky he appears to think I am Kiki Dee good one, I may get away with this.
30 minutes later, 30 minutes to go. Have arrived in Severus/Elton's room to find him completely dressed in his costume, with matching glasses where did he get those from, also he has an earring this is a bit odd, I think he has taken to being Elton a bit seriously, I hope he doesn't go any further or I will have lost my bloke to well Blokes!. I have taken to having long red curls, a nineteen 50's dress and long socks; I look like something out of grease but not to how Snape looks in Bright Pink Versace, a jacket in pink, with glittering black patterns and black trousers adoring a pink stripe, and bright pink circular glasses with silver rims. "Come Elton" I said linking my arm with his both or faces a picture of idiot grins as we head for the hall.
The Great Hall. It is a picture of red velvet, it reminds me of the Oscars I have seen on Television all glamour and glittering champagne. I have left Severus sat in a corner alone, hopefully no one will recognise him until necessary, a few girls have tried to chat him up but he answers to no one but. Haha!
On stage first the incredible Zabini Blaise and her dancing Kangaroo; you have got to be kidding me. No obviously not as she has just stepped on stage with a kangaroo. The music to Skippy the bush Kangaroo has just been struck up by the ghost band at the other end of the stage.hahaha, Skippy appears not to want to do anything, he just sits there I have a excellent chance if all the acts are this terrible, hahaha, Zabini has just been laughed off stage, oh well whose next. Parvati and Padma Patil a double act, they are singing Sisters from White Christmas, how soppy can you get, they have obviously been watching that movie to much as they are both dressed in blue feather dresses and have dyed their hair blond..Oh whoops Parvati has tripped over her feather boa. Aww! Big shame that will damage their result. Next Armandi and his Dancing 'Onkey (what in gods knickers is an Onkey) actually it appears he has a monkey, (which as I remember are banned). "OFF OFF GET OFF YOU SUCK" I didn't need to say anything the audience have said it for me, poor Gilderoy. Next, the spice girls oh how out of date can you get, can you hear them; I think it is the HufflePuffs they always have been quite simple. If u wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends. Urrgghhh!! Hate yucky succky, they better not win or I may have to take more violent action against them. Last person then it is me and Severus, I position him at the side of the stage and watch the tap dancing on roller-skates end its dreadful performance.
Next up Rebecca Wendell and Severus Snape as Elton and Kiki singing Don't go Breaking my heart. The announcement sounded and we stepped onto the stage, the room was filled with people, teachers at the front judging I happened to notice Dumbledore was not one of them, probably still in a state of shock, or hiding from us pupils he may fear seeing Emily he needn't worry she is washing all of my clothes, in the same laundry room I used. The lights circled to a spot light, resting on both of us, Snape sat at the shiny black Yamaha piano waiting for him, with a microphone attached. I picked up mine and stood ready as the start up music began. Snape began to play, as good as the legend himself, he would have been proud, especially of those specs.
Don't go breaking my heart (head shake)
I couldn't if I tried, (spin)
Oh honey if I get restless (shuffle shimmy)
Baby you're not that kind (points)
So don't go breaking my heart
You take the weight of a me (hand point)
Oh honey when I knocked on your door (knocks in air)
Ohh I gave you my key (gesture)
WOOOOOHOOO! Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward point)
I was your clown (slide)
WOOOOHOOO Nobody knows it
Right from the start (gun sound)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
Oooooooohhhhhh I gave my heart.
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart (no no signal)
Don't go breaking my heart
OH Elton no Don't go breaking my heart
And nobody told us
Cos nobody showed us (gesture to audience)
Now its up to us baby (offers hand)
Oh I think we can make it (sits on piano provocatively)
So don't miss understand me (shakes head)
You put the light in my life (lights flash)
Oh you put the spark to the flame (flash of flames from piano)
I got your heart in my sights (lifts binoculars)
WOOOHOO Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward point)
I was your clown (slide, stupid smile)
WOOOOHOO Nobody knows it
Right from the start (gun sound)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
WOAH I gave you my heart!
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart (jump no no sign) Oh Kiki no Don't go breaking my heart
Instrumental section, I dance madly Snape comes off piano and joins me in a dance routine Lift hands, twirl, shimmy left, shimmy right, float hands, left, right, jump and push hands from chest (giving heart)
WOOOHOO Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward hand point)
I was your clown (star jump)
Right from the start (gun)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart
Oh Elton/ Kiki No
DON'T GO BREAKING MY HEART
Big finish in spotlight, Snape comes off piano again and I jump into his arms, the end. We finish to standing applause and laughter; it's like a scene from a movie everything seems to be going right at last, this could be the start of a changed life (big smiles and bows)
End of chapter 7 onward we go!
Chapter 7 The Talent Contest
I woke up this morning to find my dormitory completely void of folk, oh not again not that damn cheap alarm clock, IM chucking it I swear and finding something decent. I roll over to find the alarm clock in complete and perfect working order, in fact it is only 7.00am, weird so where is everyone. I notice that all of .their pyjamas and nightgowns are all hung neatly up in the ward robe, unlike mine which are wrapped around me making me feel like an Egyptian mummy in a Sarcophagus. Pulling on my Mr Men dressing gown on over my bedclothes I dragged my corpse like body down the stairs and into the common room to find it flooded with people, all fully dressed and ready for the day. Oh dear it didn't take them long to notice me. Wolf Whistles and shouts of delight came my way along with a few 'Morning Sexy' and 'Ann Summers wear has got nothing on that dressing gown' remarks Bugger! I ran back up to my dormitory, red faced, my life is a facsimile of sham, a constant joke to everyone but me who is stuck with it. Now where are my robes?
Upon dressing in suitable attire and leaving the dormitory, I now find the common room empty 'What's going on around here' do you ever get the feeling your just lagging that bit behind at times. ooh what's that, a piece of gold paper lay upon the table glistening in an appealing way. I picked it up and squinted at the shimmering words, it read.
Talent Show Friday November 5th 7.00PM start All Welcome Originality required No Dancing monkeys will be admitted into the show as it is not original.
Ha-ha Lockhart/Armandi (whatever) The fifth of November, that's a week away, well just FYI us in plenty of time why don't you, didn't give us folk who have to develop talents in a week. I.E. ME! Today is Saturday and strangely enough, I am not plagued by my mother Wannabe Emily Tudor, I am however plagued with the thought of Snape, Where is he? What is he doing? Why hasn't he spoken to me? Answers to this probably are. In his room Washing his hair with expensive shampoo And he probably thinks IM insane.... I probably am
Now about this talent competition, what shall I do.?
Dance? Wait the last time I danced, I ended up knocking an entire rack of plates down whilst dancing to the Jackson Five in B&Q.
Spells? Nah! Not original enough, besides I never know what I might do.
Pull a rabbit out of a hat? Erm, I think I am allergic to rabbits and IM not pulling that owl/panther thing of Emily's out of a hat.
What was it that Sir Alex Ferguson the great and grey said to Mank United, he said Play to your strengths. Easy for him to say, all he ever did was sit at the side of the football pitch swinging his legs and shouting. 'Get it boys', 'Go for it boys' 'Hard on boys', like some demented leprechaun of merry old England. So what do I like doing the most? Singing. Who's my favourite singer? Elton John no question. What's my song? Don't go breaking my heart. That's it, cracked it, hit the steak on the head, I'll sing don't go breaking my heart by Elton John Perfect! Wait. that song is a duet, I will need a willing volunteer, or maybe not willing or a volunteer, hehehe I have a plan!
Stage one of the plan within a plan to quote Will Shakespeare.
Learn how to sing, and who sings don't go breaking my heart better than the man himself yes Sir Elton Hercules John. I need him, and all I need is a simple apparition spell oh this should be fun.
Empty Dormitory 7.00pm
Ready folks engage action sequence one, ACCIO ELTON JOHN! Hahahahahahaaha, and appearing in front of me is the man himself, his outfit a glimmer of glittering blue sequins, Versace and shining blue Versace glasses, his hair gel styled and face a look of confusion, I couldn't get over it. how funny is it to see your favourite pop star in front of you sat looking confused and lost. "Where am I" he asked "Errm" quick thinking. "It's a day dream, you are not really here, and you are at the MTV awards asleep you know how much you hate them" I announced. Actually strangely enough he seems pretty ok with that, he just sat looking at my hair, I felt it and it appeared to be sticking up, oops I flattened it, damn here we go again. After a while he asked "What do you want?" Ah now here we go IM gonna ask him right ok breath right. "Elton I need your help" "will you teach me to sing don't go breaking my heart as a duet for the school talent show, I must win it Elton please help me" I begged. He looked at me for a second and smiled his cheesy grin I had grown to love over the years. "I will help you Miss?" he asked "Wendell, Rebecca Wendell, huge fan" I replied all smiles. "To work then Miss Wendell" he said removing his glasses and wiping them, "I need a piano though". No problem for me a tiny piano, I mean I just conjured Elton John, okay one Yamaha Piano coming up.. ACCIO YAMAHA!...
Five minutes later.
I reckon I should have been more specific, Yamaha has come up with a Yamaha guitar, a Yamaha keyboard, a Yamaha drum kit, a Yamaha tambourine (didn't know there was one) but no Yamaha piano, Elton is watching me in awe, he appears to have stopped filing his nails to watch my mistake, right I'll try again ACCIO YAMAHA PIANO!...... this time it worked, wow what a piano, its shiny black and a grand one, Elton seems impressed and begins to sit and play, it think it is three blind mice, well I never. of all songs. Here we go then!
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton
I couldn't if I Stop! Shouted Elton, what, I thought I was good, obviously not.
"Your tone is all wrong it is too high go down an octave and
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton
I couldn't if I trie. I didn't get much further, he was at it again
"No! I didn't let Kiki Dee get away with singing like that, and she took a lot of work, sing lightly don't try to hard, let it flow, if you want to win you need to think like a genuine winner"
Again 2 3 4
Don't go breaking my heart- Elton ..................
4 hours later. I am a rocking singer, I am pure brilliance, step back, Gloria Gaynor, Whitney Houston and anybody else especially those recent manufactured bands there's a new singer in town. I have sent Elton back, to his massive mansion, he'll need more than one £1000 shopping trip to recover from teaching me, I think I was hard work, but it came to me in the end, however before he left he gave me his glasses to remember him by and to wear for the show, sweet isn't he!.
Next stage. Practising my spell.
Next my spell, for my spell to work properly I need a victim, who can I pick.hehehe wait maybe I'll kill two Yugoslavian owls with one stone. We have a spell which needs practising and one extremely annoying friend which needs to be disposed of in one way or another, so to business.....
Dormitory.
IM waiting for her she shouldn't be long she follows me everywhere anyway.... success, she has just walked through the door, a look of esteem on her face what's all that about, oh well won't be for long.
HEY! EMILY! SIFRONIUS!................IMENNTUS! Emily stopped dead in her tracks and stood completely still, a glazed look had come over her eyes her mouth hung open (catching flies Em), she stood completely motionless. "Emily, Em can you hear me" I asked. "Yes Master", came her reply. Wow what a result, a complete zombie, Frankenstein, a Mr Hyde, she is like Renfield to my Dracula, an Igor to My Doctor, A Michael Jackson to my cosmetic surgery, a complete slave, well I hope so. a test I think. "Emily sit down" She did, cool "Emily stand up and sit down again" She did so. Emily (evil grin) lick my shoes! Hahahahaaha spit and polish! Emily kiss........... Professor Dumbledore!... hey she's off, come on readers. Hahaha following my creation, walking along the corridor ignoring everyone who is speaking to her, staring straight ahead, making her way to the great hall, wait here he comes oh God... Emily walks up to Dumbledore and stops him. "Hello Miss Tudor what can I do for you" Dumbledore asks all smiles. Emily stares at him in a demented way..without warning she has just jumped up and just given Dumbledore a huge Smacker on the lips, I can't contain myself.any. haha longer..hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah Oh god oh hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, never gonna hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha oh oh IM okay okay.hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Haha.hah.ahaha.ha.
Okay done, just had glass of water and a bar of chocolate am ok now, oh his face, oh the look, a look of complete shock, if I was him I wouldn't know how to react, he just said "Okay go have a lie down miss Tudor I think you may be ill" before walking off not looking where he was going and bumping into suits of armour which argue back in annoyance, things that do not penetrate Dumbledore's state as he heads for his office.
IM now back in the Gryffindor common room sitting resting my aching ribs from laughing, Emily is just looking at me, I wonder how long this is going to last.IM worried.it won't last long enough.
6.00PM Action Stations everyone
The talent contest is in an hour, I can't turn back now, and I have come so far, I mean I have learnt to sing, cast a difficult spell and ACCIO Elton John and other large pieces of Musical equipment, don't get scared now. I head along the darkened corridors, twisting and turning, back to the corridor I stumbled upon when I became (as a reviewer put it) a peeping Tomarina. By now you have probably guessed what I am up to if not, here it is I plan to make Snape an Elton John to my Kiki Dee, with that one spell, the hard bit is getting it on him.
Snapes Quarters. The dark mahogany wood door stands in front of my shaking form, I have just witness Snape go in, and the trouble will all be worth it in the end.I hope. ALOHOMORA! I whisper, the door opens silently, I see Snape sitting at a dark desk at the other side of the room his back to me poring over some documents. Tiptoeing up behind him I raise my wand. BANG! The door slams behind me, Snape swings round in a state of guilty alarm..ITS NOW OR NEVER... SIFRONIUS.IMENNTUS, I roar, a blinding flash of light and Snape sits zombie Nation style at my feet. "Severus" I ask "Yes master" he replies in the same way as Emily (but obviously in a high squeaky girl's voice, his own not like Emily). OH God Oh God I just put a teacher under a control spell. "Stand" I say my voice quaking slightly. He did so and stood completely stationary. Wow Professor Snape under my control, I could do anything with him, many things that are unmentionable in polite society but it would be false, soz to disappoint everybody, but I want the real thing, not a robot doing things their body is not doing freely. "Severus" I say "Listen, tonight you are performing on stage in the school talent show, we are dueting and we must win, We are singing don't go breaking my heart and you are Elton John I am Kiki Dee ok, you must play the piano and sing, do you understand me" "Yes master, I am Elton John I must sing and play the piano, to Don't go breaking my heart and must win" he replied monotonously. "With enthusiasm" I added. "With Enthusiasm" he repeated still a robot; hope his performance isn't as bad as his speech. "Severus go and put these on" I said holding up his costume. He just stood still, weird huh, is the spell going already. "Severus" No response "Elton" I tried "Yes Master" he answered. Great he thinks he really is Elton John and appears to only answer to Elton brill fan bloody tastic. "Elton" I said patiently "go and put these clothes on and I will meet you here in 30 minutes. He walked away slowly "And Elton, remove your old clothes first" "Yes master Kiki" Lucky he appears to think I am Kiki Dee good one, I may get away with this.
30 minutes later, 30 minutes to go. Have arrived in Severus/Elton's room to find him completely dressed in his costume, with matching glasses where did he get those from, also he has an earring this is a bit odd, I think he has taken to being Elton a bit seriously, I hope he doesn't go any further or I will have lost my bloke to well Blokes!. I have taken to having long red curls, a nineteen 50's dress and long socks; I look like something out of grease but not to how Snape looks in Bright Pink Versace, a jacket in pink, with glittering black patterns and black trousers adoring a pink stripe, and bright pink circular glasses with silver rims. "Come Elton" I said linking my arm with his both or faces a picture of idiot grins as we head for the hall.
The Great Hall. It is a picture of red velvet, it reminds me of the Oscars I have seen on Television all glamour and glittering champagne. I have left Severus sat in a corner alone, hopefully no one will recognise him until necessary, a few girls have tried to chat him up but he answers to no one but. Haha!
On stage first the incredible Zabini Blaise and her dancing Kangaroo; you have got to be kidding me. No obviously not as she has just stepped on stage with a kangaroo. The music to Skippy the bush Kangaroo has just been struck up by the ghost band at the other end of the stage.hahaha, Skippy appears not to want to do anything, he just sits there I have a excellent chance if all the acts are this terrible, hahaha, Zabini has just been laughed off stage, oh well whose next. Parvati and Padma Patil a double act, they are singing Sisters from White Christmas, how soppy can you get, they have obviously been watching that movie to much as they are both dressed in blue feather dresses and have dyed their hair blond..Oh whoops Parvati has tripped over her feather boa. Aww! Big shame that will damage their result. Next Armandi and his Dancing 'Onkey (what in gods knickers is an Onkey) actually it appears he has a monkey, (which as I remember are banned). "OFF OFF GET OFF YOU SUCK" I didn't need to say anything the audience have said it for me, poor Gilderoy. Next, the spice girls oh how out of date can you get, can you hear them; I think it is the HufflePuffs they always have been quite simple. If u wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends. Urrgghhh!! Hate yucky succky, they better not win or I may have to take more violent action against them. Last person then it is me and Severus, I position him at the side of the stage and watch the tap dancing on roller-skates end its dreadful performance.
Next up Rebecca Wendell and Severus Snape as Elton and Kiki singing Don't go Breaking my heart. The announcement sounded and we stepped onto the stage, the room was filled with people, teachers at the front judging I happened to notice Dumbledore was not one of them, probably still in a state of shock, or hiding from us pupils he may fear seeing Emily he needn't worry she is washing all of my clothes, in the same laundry room I used. The lights circled to a spot light, resting on both of us, Snape sat at the shiny black Yamaha piano waiting for him, with a microphone attached. I picked up mine and stood ready as the start up music began. Snape began to play, as good as the legend himself, he would have been proud, especially of those specs.
Don't go breaking my heart (head shake)
I couldn't if I tried, (spin)
Oh honey if I get restless (shuffle shimmy)
Baby you're not that kind (points)
So don't go breaking my heart
You take the weight of a me (hand point)
Oh honey when I knocked on your door (knocks in air)
Ohh I gave you my key (gesture)
WOOOOOHOOO! Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward point)
I was your clown (slide)
WOOOOHOOO Nobody knows it
Right from the start (gun sound)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
Oooooooohhhhhh I gave my heart.
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart (no no signal)
Don't go breaking my heart
OH Elton no Don't go breaking my heart
And nobody told us
Cos nobody showed us (gesture to audience)
Now its up to us baby (offers hand)
Oh I think we can make it (sits on piano provocatively)
So don't miss understand me (shakes head)
You put the light in my life (lights flash)
Oh you put the spark to the flame (flash of flames from piano)
I got your heart in my sights (lifts binoculars)
WOOOHOO Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward point)
I was your clown (slide, stupid smile)
WOOOOHOO Nobody knows it
Right from the start (gun sound)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
WOAH I gave you my heart!
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart (jump no no sign) Oh Kiki no Don't go breaking my heart
Instrumental section, I dance madly Snape comes off piano and joins me in a dance routine Lift hands, twirl, shimmy left, shimmy right, float hands, left, right, jump and push hands from chest (giving heart)
WOOOHOO Nobody knows it
When I was down (downward hand point)
I was your clown (star jump)
Right from the start (gun)
I gave you my heart (gives heart)
So don't go breaking my heart
I won't go breaking your heart
Oh Elton/ Kiki No
DON'T GO BREAKING MY HEART
Big finish in spotlight, Snape comes off piano again and I jump into his arms, the end. We finish to standing applause and laughter; it's like a scene from a movie everything seems to be going right at last, this could be the start of a changed life (big smiles and bows)
End of chapter 7 onward we go!