Mad Malibu Summer!

To Metal Dragon1: Yeah, technicalities. Gotta love 'em. I hope you can get one up after the tenth. I can't wait for that! Well, Ace has a talent for understanding women, so he was able to give X23 a name she ended up liking.

To Red Witch: I read the new chapters of "Sleepover of Doom" and I loved 'em. Uhm, Fox got pictures of Storm and he's trying to sell 'em. I'm trying to stop Evan from gutting him alive like a fish. I'm glad you liked the pie fight! Here's the new chapter for you! Enjoy the insanity!

To Wizard1: When's the next chapter of "Karaoke Dance Party" coming up? I can't wait for the new chapter!

It's Profile Time Again! (Crowd hoots, hollers, cheers, screams, chants, and claps. Some hold up signs) This time, we look at a Cobra agent who's for the birds: Raptor!

Raptor

Real Name: Unknown

Function: Cobra Falconer

Birthplace: Unknown

Bio: At one time in his life, the Cobra agent known as Raptor was a yuppie accountant/tax consultant who worked in the money-crazed world of Wall Street. He also had a hobby of falconry.

Growing obsessed with it, Raptor tried to breed bigger, stronger, faster birds of prey, as well as equipped them with steel tips for their talons. Raptor used these birds to obtain very profitable prey.

Destro happened to catch Raptor while the falconer was poaching at a Cobra mink ranch. Rather than take the Cobra Commander route and have him executed, the cooler-headed (A/N: No pun intended) Destro saw how he could be useful and had him brought into the Cobra organization.

Now with Cobra's resources at his disposal, Raptor is at work breeding birds that are powerful enough to attack GI Joe and the Misfits of both east and west coast variety. It's rumored that Raptor may be using Mindbender's technology to genetically engineer super-birds.

Raptor is known for wearing a ridiculous-looking bird suit. He has no delusions about being human even if he does reside in a giant bird cage most of the time. He also occasionally aids Tomax and Xamot with tax issues (A/N: Who can blame them? These tax laws are INSANE!!)

Chapter 20: The Crazy Day Ends At Last!

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(The Malibu Fair)

"Heads up, Dreadnoks!" Ace leapt towards the fake rock band, firing his claw lasers.

"Whoa!" The Dreadnoks dodged, and the lasers hit Buzzer's drums.

"Me drum kit! I loved that drum kit!" Buzzer screamed.

"Buzzer, you've only had it for one day! You're acting like you were married to it! Now get your chainsaw and give me a hand here!" Zartan snapped as he grappled with a snarling Ace.

"Well, I guess we can't worry about the whole Spinal Tap thing." Zarana sighed as she threw some shuriken at Mayday and Fusebox.

"Oh, shut up about that!" Zartan growled.

"Lucky thing I prepared backup." Virus whispered to himself maliciously.

"Hey, I hear rumbling!" Tommy yelled as he tried to safely take down a couple hypnotized kids.

"Uh oh…" Jester gulped. "I think we have a problem." The rumble increased in volume as the source came closer: A black Hummer with six wheels on steroids. The vehicle started as a Hummer with neon-green and blue highlights. However, after the front side doors, the vehicle became heavily armored and resembled a futuristic Winnebago. Vents jutted out to the sides of the vehicle. Four wheels were in this part of the vehicle. It had a pair of huge machine guns on top to the sides of a missile launcher.

"Behold…my personal transport!" Virus crowed. "The Mutator!"

"Man, he has lost it!" Zandar grumbled. Virus pressed a button on his belt and he disappeared! He appeared in a flash of light in the car's cab.

"Ha ha! Fire!" Virus cackled. The machine guns fired tracers and the missiles fired.

"That's psycho's going to hit someone!" Siryn screeched.

"Not today!" Ace fired his claw beams at the tries. No good. "Aw, you gotta be kidding!"

"The tires are made of a special plastic I invented, you savage." Virus crowed. "Now I shall destroy the West Coast Misfits, and then…Toad."

"Load the explosive pies!" Jester ordered.

"Look!" Mayday pointed at the Mutator's roof. A tan-and-yellow blur jumped on the roof, and revealed itself to be Athena in her uniform (A/N: It's basically the tan-and-yellow uniform Wolverine wore through most of the 80s in the comics, only the costume allows her hair to flow out). The clone used her claws to punch into the roof.

"Oh no you don't!" Virus screamed. He stopped the Mutator, and he pressed a button. The vehicle rose as a quartet of legs like the ones on the AT-AT from Star Wars made their appearance. The vehicle walked and swayed, trying to get the feral clone off the roof. "Get off me car!"

"Your car is a pile of junk!" X23 roared.

"YO JOE!!!" Torpedo and Quick-Kick rolled in on tanks. Accompanying them was the California Cruiser, carrying the rest of the West Coast Misfits.

"Ha!" John Proudstar pitched his hatchet and it hit Virus's soundboard.

"No!" The Dreadnoks screamed as they saw it explode, freeing the teens.

"What?" They all blinked and chattered amongst themselves.

"Let's get out of here!" Virus screamed. He managed to throw Athena off, then under gunfire and a barrage of exploding pies, the Mutator's legs retracted, and the Dreadnoks used it to try and make their escape.

"And don't come back!" General Whithalf hollered. Dazzler and the Blitzers angrily stomped onto the stage. Dazzler glared at the Mutator and blasted its tires with a light laser, flattening it.

"OH NO!!!" Virus screamed. Ali stomped up to the modified vehicle, opened a cab door and jumped in. The transforming vehicle jumped up and down and rocked back and forth with Virus's screaming and the sounds of Ali beating the snot out of him.

"And THAT'S for calling me a dumb blonde!" Ali screamed as she stomped out.

"Never get on her bad side, Longshot." Kyle snickered. Longshot gulped.

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(The beach, an hour later)

The fair was back on, and the Dreadnoks were carted off to jail.

"Marie-Ange, Jenny, for the thousandth time, you're forgiven! It wasn't your fault!" Ace exclaimed from the Ballroom Blitzers' dressing room. "I have to go play now!" He ran to the stage, where the other Blitzers were waiting. Ace looked out at the cheering crowd of kids and Joes. "LET'S ROCK!!!" Ace proclaimed, grabbing his beloved blue Flying-V. The Ballroom Blitzers did some originals and jumped into a couple covers of old songs. A minute after, Ali sang a couple dance songs. The fair itself was success, despite the insanity that happened at the concert that kicked it off. Everyone had fun there. Some people decided to get on stage and do a little entertaining. General Whithalf jumped n stage and played a rockin' solo on a guitar. Jester did a comedy act which delighted the kids. The best joke was a story he told about Britney Spears and the Grand Theft Auto video games. Mayday amazed the audience by using X-Ray vision to predict what was in people's pockets. Quick-Kick and Kicker re-enacted famous movie scenes. Kyle and Toshiro set up a ring and had an exhibition wrestling match, which turned into a brawl when the two started arguing again.

"Man, we had a great time!" Longshot grinned as the gang returned to Malibu Base.

"Has anyone seen Firestorm? I haven't seen him since I saw him go mad with Twinkies and attack those police officers." Rahne asked.

"Two words: Section Eight." Kyle laughed.

I am going to have one heck of a time as West Coast leader. Theresa smiled.

Well, another fun Malibu adventure ends! What insanity will happen in the future? Who will the West Coast Misfits face next? Find out soon! This is L1701E, saying thanks for reading!