Disclaimer: Still the same.
A/N: Thanks for the encouraging reviews! Keep'em coming, please.
TRADITIONAL
Fifteen minutes later, they reached the nice little beach which lay secluded between some rocks, which formed a little bay around the white sand.
Max walked quicker, she couldn't wait to feel the soft sand beneath her feet.
"Wow." Logan exclaimed. "This is beautiful!"
Max already imagined how it would be to dive into the clear blue water.
"What did you give this woman for her to tell you about this place?!" he said in awe.
"Guess it's just our lucky day," she grinned at him.
"For a change!" Logan agreed.
"So what do you say? Swimming or sunbathing first?"
Max was completely focussed on the view in front of her that she seemed to forget totally about the issues Logan would be facing in a second.
"I'd say we get changed first," Logan said, wiping the sweat from his face.
"Can't wait to see you in those...whatever you bought there," he grinned.
"Yeah, too bad I'm already wearing them, huh?" She teased him.
Logan turned around to her displaying a mock frown. "Don't you think that's a little unfair?" he asked.
"Why?"
"Cause I'm gonna have to change in front of you," he said, raising his eye brow.
Max grinned from ear to ear. "Yeah, well...bad luck, buddy."
Logan turned around to look over the beach, grinning at her comment when the sudden impact of the chair, stopped by the sand nearly made him topple over. "Hey, watch out!" he gasped, grabbing the wheels to steady himself. "Slow down, will ya!" he added angrily.
"This is no cross-country vehicle, you know!"
"Oops, sorry." Max decided to try and ignore his tone. "No big dealio."
"Yeah, sure," he murmured, taking hold of the wheels himself.
"Excuse-me? I said I was sorry." Max felt anger rise within her. Why did he have to be that sensitive all the time?
"Anyway, I'm gonna do this myself." Logan replied stubbornly. "You go ahead, do whatever you wanted to do." He knew he was acting stupid, but having been reminded again that he just couldn't join Max running around in her playful mood, eager to get into the water had been like a slap in the face and had spoiled the whole beautiful moment for him.
"Yeah right, I'm gonna leave you here and go for a swim. What the hell do you think, Logan?"
"I'm thinking that I don't want to spoil your fun," he said, pushing himself inch by inch through the deep sand.
Max stepped ahead and watched him intently. She knew he hated that but right now her anger and frustration grew. "Damn it, we are doing this together, so why can't you accept my help? I'm not doing this because I think you are not capable of it but because...just because. Don't make it that hard on yourself!"
Logan gave up on manoeuvring the chair through the sand and ran his hands over his face. "Max, you don't get it, do you?" he said. His voice was calm now. A little too calm, indeed. "The point is I'm actually not capable of ...any of this.I can't walk in the sand with you, I can't jump into the water," he looked around. "I can't climb those rocks with you."
Max shook her head, but let him talk.
"I see how happy you are and how eager to go running straight into the water, but you hold back because of me." He shook his head.
Max looked at him confused.
Seeing her face, Logan explained. "It hurts not being able to do those things. But it hurts even more not being able to do those things with you…for you."
"You are right. It's not fair. But you don't hold me back, Logan. Don't ever think that, I'm so happy being able to share this with you, I don't care about jumping into the water, running through the sand or whatever. We will do everything at our own pace, and I'm completely happy. I have never been happier in fact."
"No Max, I mean, I don't want you to ever ...miss out on something...you can do...because I can't," he added determined.
Max stepped closer, ready to object, but the look in Logan's eyes stopped her. This was far more than self-pity or stubbornness. He had really meant what he had said. He didn't want her to miss out on all the things she could still do on behalf of him.
She kneeled down in front of him and laid her hands on his knees and said out loud the only three words that were forming in her mind. "I love you."
Logan looked into her eyes and smiled slightly, calm now. "I love you, too, Max. How couldn't I!" He took her hands in his and kissed them. Then he pulled her closer to kiss her lips.
Snapping out of the moment and turning her attention back to their beautiful surroundings, Max was ready to get up again when Logan held her back.
"Promise?"
"What?" Max asked confused.
"That you won't miss out on things just because of me," he said firmly, looking into her eyes.
She looked at him with a serious expression for a long moment and then nodded.
"I promise." Suddenly she jumped up and stepped behind his chair. "And now I don't wanna miss out on sharing the sea with nobody but you!"
"Okay," Logan sighed. "Just give me a second to get changed. Why don't you go ahead, test the water?" he asked carefully, not intending to cause another argument.
Max looked at him hesitantly. "You sure you are gonna be fine?"
"Yeah, I'm sure. Just give me some time." Logan said seriously.
Max nodded, knowing he was not just talking about the swim, and quickly threw the light dress she had been wearing over her shoulders, kicking the flip-flops off, not caring where they landed. Then she grinned at Logan and ran into the water, never indicating it might be too cold. In one smooth, graceful move she dived in, coming up moments later, laughing out loud.
Logan watched Max run into the water, awed by her new tight fitting swim suit, while quickly changing into his new pair of black boxers.
Then he slowly wheeled closer to the water, the wet sand making it easier to move forward.
He watched Max's head bob up and down in the water. She was obviously scanning the ground for seashells. He smiled and slid down from the chair onto the sand. The slow waves were already playing around his feet. Thankful that there were no larger waves he moved further into the water until it reached up to his waist. He gasped a little when the cool water came up high enough for him to feel it. Looking out for Max, Logan turned around and pedalled with his hands through the shallow water until it was deep enough to do a few strong strokes.
Max had watched him the whole time, but pretended to be engrossed into her own activities. She had been on alert, not sure how Logan would manage in the water, given the tide was pretty strong. Besides, she still worried about his shoulder.
After a few strokes, Logan began to feel a little nervous. His shoulder was hurting quite a bit and the tide didn't make it easier for him. He had always resented Bling for trying to talk him into swimming, but now he had to admit that he was really lacking practice.
Max carefully made her way a little closer, just in case he needed her support.
Logan was relieved to see Max only a few meters away from him.
He did another two strokes until he faced Max.
"Hey." She smiled at him, water running down her face. "How are you holding up?"
"Fine. A little out of practice maybe." Logan admitted.
"Looking good though." She dived down again and came back up behind him. "This is great, isn't it?"
"Yeah," Logan panted, turning around to her. "Mind if I hold onto you for a sec?"
"No problem." she smiled at him, glad he finally seemed able to ask for help.
Logan put his arms around her and gave her a wet kiss. "You look even more beautiful in the water," he said.
"Really?" She held him tight, treading water, supporting them both. "You don't look too bad either, like a wet puppy."
"Well, thank you, Max. Any man would be flattered being compared to a puppy!" he said jokingly.
"Yeah, well. So I guess this is a dream coming true. And we had to go to Mexico for this. Crazy. We could have had it much easier if you had said anything."
Logan looked at her, stunned. "Me? What's that supposed to mean?"
"That you were too shy to admit what you felt."
"You could have 'said something' as well, couldn't you?"
She grinned at him.
"I'm the girl. The guy's supposed to take the first step, ask for a date, am I right?"
Logan said. "Oh, is that so? I didn't know we were that traditional..."
"I definitely am. Apart from the fact that I kick ass and you cook."
"That's pretty screwed up though-talking about traditional."
"I know...but I would like it to be traditional sometimes, you know."
She kissed his wet forehead. "At least pretend it."
"We can try," Logan shrugged. "At least for today," he added.
"Sounds good to me. You know what that means?"
"No, but I bet you're gonna tell me." Logan grinned.
"You'd win that bet anytime!" With that she grabbed his shoulders and dove him under water, holding her breath and following him.
Max knew she had to be careful, but she still hadn't been able to resist the urge to do it. When Logan broke through the surface again, she came up next to him, giggling. "That's what they do, right? Traditional couples, I mean."
"Well, if you say so," Logan replied, turning around suddenly, then quickly dove under water, pulling Max down with him.
Then he circled her into the direction of the beach.
"How about a nice traditional sun bath?" he said, when he heard Max surface from the water.
She grinned at him. "You could really use a little tan."
Logan was approaching the beach with strong strokes now.
"You could show me what traditional couples do with that sun cream," he yelled back at her.
"That I don't know, I have actually never needed any...I'm afraid you gotta teach me first."
"Deal." Logan said, sitting down on the sand, having reached the shallow water.
"I hate to bring this up, but if I don't help you to the towel, you are gonna look breaded."
Max stood over him, looking from Logan to the place where he had left their towels, clothes and other stuff.
Logan hesitated for a moment, looking over to the chair which was still some meters away from where he sat. He sighed and looked up at her. Then he grabbed her hand and pulled her down into the water with him. He grabbed a handful of sand and spread it over her back. "What's wrong with that?" he asked innocently.
"Nothing, I guess."
Logan rolled over so he was lying on top of Max, supporting himself with his arms.
Max smiled at him, squinting slightly at the sun hitting her face.
Logan slowly leaned down into a long slow kiss. "Okay," he finally said, breaking away. "I'm gonna let you carry me over there-in this very untraditional way-if you let me take you out for dinner tonight."
"I think I can take that." Max carefully slid out from under him and waited until he had sat back up.
Logan put his arm around Max's shoulder and let her lift him up. She was having no trouble carrying him, but she knew he still didn't like it.
Logan was relieved when they reached the towels and she gently put him down on the big beach towel he had chosen. "Wasn't that bad, was it?"
Logan just grunted and turned to lie on his stomach.
"Where is the sun lotion?" Max asked, rubbing the sand from her hands.
Before Logan could answer, she had found it under one of the towels and was pouring a generous amount into her hand. "And now I need you to relax, so I can show you 'traditional'," she said in a seductive tone.
"Max?" He said when she kneeled over him, with one leg on each side of his body, spreading the lotion on his shoulders.
„Yeah?" She playfully massaged his neck.
„One more thing."
"What is it?" Max asked.
"You remember what we agreed on back in that park in L.A.?"
"What do you mean?"
"About taking it slow."
"Sure."
"Back then I felt like we both needed some time to adjust to that new situation."
"Right. So?"
"How do you feel about that now?" Logan asked seriously.
Max thought about it for a second, breaking the touch, then she smiled. "I think I'm kind of getting used to that traditional couple thing. And I like it! " she added, placing a kiss on the side of his neck.
Logan swallowed and turned his head towards her. "I just need you to know that if I'm taking it real slow, or if I don't respond to your flirting, it's not because I don't find you attractive…" He levered himself up on his left elbow and shyly looked at her. "Cause you are…incredibly beautiful," he said.
Max grinned contently and lay back down onto his shoulder.
"Believe me," Logan continued. "I have undressed you with my eyes a million times…" Max gave him a small slap on the back for that remark, but he continued. "..And I have made love to you in my dreams a number of times." He blushed, seeing a dirty grin spread on Max's face.
Logan sighed and drew a face. "Seriously. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever met. It's just, I have changed. My body has changed. I just don't know how…if anything will work like it used to -like it did just a couple of weeks ago," he corrected himself. "I mean, I know we talked about it already, but…"
Max sat up straight and looked down into his face which was displaying a wide array of all kinds of emotions. Patiently, she waited for him to continue.
He looked at her for a while, searching for the right words, then broke her gaze and ran his hands over his face. "God! This is so frustrating!" he said out loud, startling Max who already hadn't expected him to say anything more.
"I mean I want you so bad, but I don't know how …." he bit his lip and directed his eyes towards the sand, avoiding her gaze. "I feel so bad for not being able to enjoy you lying close to me, just because I can't stop thinking about what the next step would be…" He ran his hand through his hair. Looking closer, Max was shocked to see his eyes brimmed with tears. She reached out for his hand, entwining their fingers.
"We don't have to do anything you don't feel comfortable with," she offered sincerely. "In contrast to what most people may think of me, I can wait, Logan. Until you're ready. Until we both are ready to take that step," she added and kissed him.
**
When Max opened her eyes again, she realized that she had fallen asleep, here on the beach in Logan's arms. Her face was hot and she felt slightly dizzy. She sat up and rubbed her face looking around confused. The sun was already low in the sky and the water was reflecting its golden shimmer.
Logan was sound asleep, not even stirring, when Max drew away from his embrace.
She yawned and stretched, always watching him sleep. He looked so cute and peaceful.
Then she got up and slipped her dress back on.
Out of an impulse, she took one of the smaller towels and spread it over Logan, so he wouldn't be cold in the cool breeze. Then she walked over to the water, strolling along the beach, scanning the ground for seashells.
**
Logan eventually stirred when he missed the warm body in his embrace, he sleepy looked around, a little confused at first. Then he remembered where he was and leaned on his elbows. Finally he discovered Max's figure quite a distance away, strolling along the shore. He couldn't draw his gaze away from that beautiful creature.
He wished he could run over to her and swivel her through the air. But that wasn't going to happen and he had to accept that.
Max walked all the way over to the rocks that were reaching into the water and started climbing them, until she was surrounded by the tosing sea. She inhaled deeply, relishing the feeling of freedom the rough surroundings and the solitude of the moment gave her.
As much as she loved the closeness with Logan, she enjoyed this moment of her own. After all she had been on her own most of her life. It took some time to adapt to constant company, even if it was the man she loved.
Logan could still make her out in the distance. A lump formed in his throat. If he wanted to keep her he would have to live with giving her space. He trusted her completely and knew she accepted him wholly, despite his disability. But there were some things she couldn't and shouldn't miss out on just because of him. It hurt like hell to admit that, but this was part of what his life was like now and he could only make Max and himself happy when he learnt to deal with that fact.
Max looked over the sea perfectly at peace with herself and the world. Didn't she have everything she wanted? She had left the horrors of Manticore behind, she had friends, she had a home and now she had the man of her dreams by her side, who respected her and gave her the freedom she needed...Right now she was away from home, but eventually they would return to Seattle and she knew that her life would be waiting for her- even be a whole lot better with Logan by her side.
Logan eventually laid back and patiently waited for Max to return to him. He spent the time watching some small white clouds build above them. It was still warm and the sounds of waves had a relaxing impact on him. He felt at peace and satisfied for the first time in weeks.
A/N: Thanks for the encouraging reviews! Keep'em coming, please.
TRADITIONAL
Fifteen minutes later, they reached the nice little beach which lay secluded between some rocks, which formed a little bay around the white sand.
Max walked quicker, she couldn't wait to feel the soft sand beneath her feet.
"Wow." Logan exclaimed. "This is beautiful!"
Max already imagined how it would be to dive into the clear blue water.
"What did you give this woman for her to tell you about this place?!" he said in awe.
"Guess it's just our lucky day," she grinned at him.
"For a change!" Logan agreed.
"So what do you say? Swimming or sunbathing first?"
Max was completely focussed on the view in front of her that she seemed to forget totally about the issues Logan would be facing in a second.
"I'd say we get changed first," Logan said, wiping the sweat from his face.
"Can't wait to see you in those...whatever you bought there," he grinned.
"Yeah, too bad I'm already wearing them, huh?" She teased him.
Logan turned around to her displaying a mock frown. "Don't you think that's a little unfair?" he asked.
"Why?"
"Cause I'm gonna have to change in front of you," he said, raising his eye brow.
Max grinned from ear to ear. "Yeah, well...bad luck, buddy."
Logan turned around to look over the beach, grinning at her comment when the sudden impact of the chair, stopped by the sand nearly made him topple over. "Hey, watch out!" he gasped, grabbing the wheels to steady himself. "Slow down, will ya!" he added angrily.
"This is no cross-country vehicle, you know!"
"Oops, sorry." Max decided to try and ignore his tone. "No big dealio."
"Yeah, sure," he murmured, taking hold of the wheels himself.
"Excuse-me? I said I was sorry." Max felt anger rise within her. Why did he have to be that sensitive all the time?
"Anyway, I'm gonna do this myself." Logan replied stubbornly. "You go ahead, do whatever you wanted to do." He knew he was acting stupid, but having been reminded again that he just couldn't join Max running around in her playful mood, eager to get into the water had been like a slap in the face and had spoiled the whole beautiful moment for him.
"Yeah right, I'm gonna leave you here and go for a swim. What the hell do you think, Logan?"
"I'm thinking that I don't want to spoil your fun," he said, pushing himself inch by inch through the deep sand.
Max stepped ahead and watched him intently. She knew he hated that but right now her anger and frustration grew. "Damn it, we are doing this together, so why can't you accept my help? I'm not doing this because I think you are not capable of it but because...just because. Don't make it that hard on yourself!"
Logan gave up on manoeuvring the chair through the sand and ran his hands over his face. "Max, you don't get it, do you?" he said. His voice was calm now. A little too calm, indeed. "The point is I'm actually not capable of ...any of this.I can't walk in the sand with you, I can't jump into the water," he looked around. "I can't climb those rocks with you."
Max shook her head, but let him talk.
"I see how happy you are and how eager to go running straight into the water, but you hold back because of me." He shook his head.
Max looked at him confused.
Seeing her face, Logan explained. "It hurts not being able to do those things. But it hurts even more not being able to do those things with you…for you."
"You are right. It's not fair. But you don't hold me back, Logan. Don't ever think that, I'm so happy being able to share this with you, I don't care about jumping into the water, running through the sand or whatever. We will do everything at our own pace, and I'm completely happy. I have never been happier in fact."
"No Max, I mean, I don't want you to ever ...miss out on something...you can do...because I can't," he added determined.
Max stepped closer, ready to object, but the look in Logan's eyes stopped her. This was far more than self-pity or stubbornness. He had really meant what he had said. He didn't want her to miss out on all the things she could still do on behalf of him.
She kneeled down in front of him and laid her hands on his knees and said out loud the only three words that were forming in her mind. "I love you."
Logan looked into her eyes and smiled slightly, calm now. "I love you, too, Max. How couldn't I!" He took her hands in his and kissed them. Then he pulled her closer to kiss her lips.
Snapping out of the moment and turning her attention back to their beautiful surroundings, Max was ready to get up again when Logan held her back.
"Promise?"
"What?" Max asked confused.
"That you won't miss out on things just because of me," he said firmly, looking into her eyes.
She looked at him with a serious expression for a long moment and then nodded.
"I promise." Suddenly she jumped up and stepped behind his chair. "And now I don't wanna miss out on sharing the sea with nobody but you!"
"Okay," Logan sighed. "Just give me a second to get changed. Why don't you go ahead, test the water?" he asked carefully, not intending to cause another argument.
Max looked at him hesitantly. "You sure you are gonna be fine?"
"Yeah, I'm sure. Just give me some time." Logan said seriously.
Max nodded, knowing he was not just talking about the swim, and quickly threw the light dress she had been wearing over her shoulders, kicking the flip-flops off, not caring where they landed. Then she grinned at Logan and ran into the water, never indicating it might be too cold. In one smooth, graceful move she dived in, coming up moments later, laughing out loud.
Logan watched Max run into the water, awed by her new tight fitting swim suit, while quickly changing into his new pair of black boxers.
Then he slowly wheeled closer to the water, the wet sand making it easier to move forward.
He watched Max's head bob up and down in the water. She was obviously scanning the ground for seashells. He smiled and slid down from the chair onto the sand. The slow waves were already playing around his feet. Thankful that there were no larger waves he moved further into the water until it reached up to his waist. He gasped a little when the cool water came up high enough for him to feel it. Looking out for Max, Logan turned around and pedalled with his hands through the shallow water until it was deep enough to do a few strong strokes.
Max had watched him the whole time, but pretended to be engrossed into her own activities. She had been on alert, not sure how Logan would manage in the water, given the tide was pretty strong. Besides, she still worried about his shoulder.
After a few strokes, Logan began to feel a little nervous. His shoulder was hurting quite a bit and the tide didn't make it easier for him. He had always resented Bling for trying to talk him into swimming, but now he had to admit that he was really lacking practice.
Max carefully made her way a little closer, just in case he needed her support.
Logan was relieved to see Max only a few meters away from him.
He did another two strokes until he faced Max.
"Hey." She smiled at him, water running down her face. "How are you holding up?"
"Fine. A little out of practice maybe." Logan admitted.
"Looking good though." She dived down again and came back up behind him. "This is great, isn't it?"
"Yeah," Logan panted, turning around to her. "Mind if I hold onto you for a sec?"
"No problem." she smiled at him, glad he finally seemed able to ask for help.
Logan put his arms around her and gave her a wet kiss. "You look even more beautiful in the water," he said.
"Really?" She held him tight, treading water, supporting them both. "You don't look too bad either, like a wet puppy."
"Well, thank you, Max. Any man would be flattered being compared to a puppy!" he said jokingly.
"Yeah, well. So I guess this is a dream coming true. And we had to go to Mexico for this. Crazy. We could have had it much easier if you had said anything."
Logan looked at her, stunned. "Me? What's that supposed to mean?"
"That you were too shy to admit what you felt."
"You could have 'said something' as well, couldn't you?"
She grinned at him.
"I'm the girl. The guy's supposed to take the first step, ask for a date, am I right?"
Logan said. "Oh, is that so? I didn't know we were that traditional..."
"I definitely am. Apart from the fact that I kick ass and you cook."
"That's pretty screwed up though-talking about traditional."
"I know...but I would like it to be traditional sometimes, you know."
She kissed his wet forehead. "At least pretend it."
"We can try," Logan shrugged. "At least for today," he added.
"Sounds good to me. You know what that means?"
"No, but I bet you're gonna tell me." Logan grinned.
"You'd win that bet anytime!" With that she grabbed his shoulders and dove him under water, holding her breath and following him.
Max knew she had to be careful, but she still hadn't been able to resist the urge to do it. When Logan broke through the surface again, she came up next to him, giggling. "That's what they do, right? Traditional couples, I mean."
"Well, if you say so," Logan replied, turning around suddenly, then quickly dove under water, pulling Max down with him.
Then he circled her into the direction of the beach.
"How about a nice traditional sun bath?" he said, when he heard Max surface from the water.
She grinned at him. "You could really use a little tan."
Logan was approaching the beach with strong strokes now.
"You could show me what traditional couples do with that sun cream," he yelled back at her.
"That I don't know, I have actually never needed any...I'm afraid you gotta teach me first."
"Deal." Logan said, sitting down on the sand, having reached the shallow water.
"I hate to bring this up, but if I don't help you to the towel, you are gonna look breaded."
Max stood over him, looking from Logan to the place where he had left their towels, clothes and other stuff.
Logan hesitated for a moment, looking over to the chair which was still some meters away from where he sat. He sighed and looked up at her. Then he grabbed her hand and pulled her down into the water with him. He grabbed a handful of sand and spread it over her back. "What's wrong with that?" he asked innocently.
"Nothing, I guess."
Logan rolled over so he was lying on top of Max, supporting himself with his arms.
Max smiled at him, squinting slightly at the sun hitting her face.
Logan slowly leaned down into a long slow kiss. "Okay," he finally said, breaking away. "I'm gonna let you carry me over there-in this very untraditional way-if you let me take you out for dinner tonight."
"I think I can take that." Max carefully slid out from under him and waited until he had sat back up.
Logan put his arm around Max's shoulder and let her lift him up. She was having no trouble carrying him, but she knew he still didn't like it.
Logan was relieved when they reached the towels and she gently put him down on the big beach towel he had chosen. "Wasn't that bad, was it?"
Logan just grunted and turned to lie on his stomach.
"Where is the sun lotion?" Max asked, rubbing the sand from her hands.
Before Logan could answer, she had found it under one of the towels and was pouring a generous amount into her hand. "And now I need you to relax, so I can show you 'traditional'," she said in a seductive tone.
"Max?" He said when she kneeled over him, with one leg on each side of his body, spreading the lotion on his shoulders.
„Yeah?" She playfully massaged his neck.
„One more thing."
"What is it?" Max asked.
"You remember what we agreed on back in that park in L.A.?"
"What do you mean?"
"About taking it slow."
"Sure."
"Back then I felt like we both needed some time to adjust to that new situation."
"Right. So?"
"How do you feel about that now?" Logan asked seriously.
Max thought about it for a second, breaking the touch, then she smiled. "I think I'm kind of getting used to that traditional couple thing. And I like it! " she added, placing a kiss on the side of his neck.
Logan swallowed and turned his head towards her. "I just need you to know that if I'm taking it real slow, or if I don't respond to your flirting, it's not because I don't find you attractive…" He levered himself up on his left elbow and shyly looked at her. "Cause you are…incredibly beautiful," he said.
Max grinned contently and lay back down onto his shoulder.
"Believe me," Logan continued. "I have undressed you with my eyes a million times…" Max gave him a small slap on the back for that remark, but he continued. "..And I have made love to you in my dreams a number of times." He blushed, seeing a dirty grin spread on Max's face.
Logan sighed and drew a face. "Seriously. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever met. It's just, I have changed. My body has changed. I just don't know how…if anything will work like it used to -like it did just a couple of weeks ago," he corrected himself. "I mean, I know we talked about it already, but…"
Max sat up straight and looked down into his face which was displaying a wide array of all kinds of emotions. Patiently, she waited for him to continue.
He looked at her for a while, searching for the right words, then broke her gaze and ran his hands over his face. "God! This is so frustrating!" he said out loud, startling Max who already hadn't expected him to say anything more.
"I mean I want you so bad, but I don't know how …." he bit his lip and directed his eyes towards the sand, avoiding her gaze. "I feel so bad for not being able to enjoy you lying close to me, just because I can't stop thinking about what the next step would be…" He ran his hand through his hair. Looking closer, Max was shocked to see his eyes brimmed with tears. She reached out for his hand, entwining their fingers.
"We don't have to do anything you don't feel comfortable with," she offered sincerely. "In contrast to what most people may think of me, I can wait, Logan. Until you're ready. Until we both are ready to take that step," she added and kissed him.
**
When Max opened her eyes again, she realized that she had fallen asleep, here on the beach in Logan's arms. Her face was hot and she felt slightly dizzy. She sat up and rubbed her face looking around confused. The sun was already low in the sky and the water was reflecting its golden shimmer.
Logan was sound asleep, not even stirring, when Max drew away from his embrace.
She yawned and stretched, always watching him sleep. He looked so cute and peaceful.
Then she got up and slipped her dress back on.
Out of an impulse, she took one of the smaller towels and spread it over Logan, so he wouldn't be cold in the cool breeze. Then she walked over to the water, strolling along the beach, scanning the ground for seashells.
**
Logan eventually stirred when he missed the warm body in his embrace, he sleepy looked around, a little confused at first. Then he remembered where he was and leaned on his elbows. Finally he discovered Max's figure quite a distance away, strolling along the shore. He couldn't draw his gaze away from that beautiful creature.
He wished he could run over to her and swivel her through the air. But that wasn't going to happen and he had to accept that.
Max walked all the way over to the rocks that were reaching into the water and started climbing them, until she was surrounded by the tosing sea. She inhaled deeply, relishing the feeling of freedom the rough surroundings and the solitude of the moment gave her.
As much as she loved the closeness with Logan, she enjoyed this moment of her own. After all she had been on her own most of her life. It took some time to adapt to constant company, even if it was the man she loved.
Logan could still make her out in the distance. A lump formed in his throat. If he wanted to keep her he would have to live with giving her space. He trusted her completely and knew she accepted him wholly, despite his disability. But there were some things she couldn't and shouldn't miss out on just because of him. It hurt like hell to admit that, but this was part of what his life was like now and he could only make Max and himself happy when he learnt to deal with that fact.
Max looked over the sea perfectly at peace with herself and the world. Didn't she have everything she wanted? She had left the horrors of Manticore behind, she had friends, she had a home and now she had the man of her dreams by her side, who respected her and gave her the freedom she needed...Right now she was away from home, but eventually they would return to Seattle and she knew that her life would be waiting for her- even be a whole lot better with Logan by her side.
Logan eventually laid back and patiently waited for Max to return to him. He spent the time watching some small white clouds build above them. It was still warm and the sounds of waves had a relaxing impact on him. He felt at peace and satisfied for the first time in weeks.