The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z   

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Thanks to Jeril for help with the Roshi punishment! She's the perfect cure for writer's block!

Chapter 32

            "And he didn't, ya know, blast you or anything?" Joseph asked, a little surprised. He, Nadia and Yoli were queuing for lunch. It'd been over a month since Yoli's 'transformation', and fortunately (or unfortunately, whichever way you look at it) for Nadia, she was her old self again.

            "Nope." Yoli stated proudly. She'd just finished explaining the different escapades she and Nadia had had with 'Skittles'.

            "Wow, amazing." Joseph muttered, rubbing the scar that ran from his eye to the other side of his nose.

            "That I am, Joe my man…ooooo, pie!" Yoli squealed, seeing the various flavours of pie stacked up.

            "Hey, I wonder who they got for full-time dinner service? I'm getting pissed off with Oolong peering down my tops whenever he serves me gravy." Nadia shuddered at the awful memories.

            "Hello you pretty girls! And how may I help you?" Master Roshi's yellow-tooth lined grin came into view, and there was the pervert himself, kitted up in a clinically white apron, hair net and pink tennis shoes.

            "And it gets worse…" Joe muttered.

            "Says you, and you're not a girl!" Yoli shook her head.

            "Hey, I think Roshi swings both ways, if you know what I mean. He's given me some pretty creepy glances, anyway." Joe shuddered, walked past Roshi without so much as a glance, picked up a slice of pie and made his way to the Vegeta table.

            "Yo, Roshi!" Yoli greeted cheerfully.

            "No, it's you! Eep! It's both of you!" Master Roshi made a cross sign with his fingers.

            "You're not still sore about the camera thing, are you?" Nadia sighed, remembering Roshi's punishment.

            "Hey! I was locked in a room for two weeks, with only bread and water, no magazines and they brought in some Amazon-type women! I do not find aggressiveness sexy! They weren't gentle at all." Roshi sniffed, grimacing as he remembered the punishment Seventeen had handed out to him. "And Cell wasn't much help either. Just rocked back and forth muttering your name!" Roshi glared at Yoli who grinned back.

            "That'll teach ya, dirty old man." Nadia shook her head, grabbed a tuna sandwich and followed Joe to the table.

            "Dirty? Me? If I'm dirty then there is no word to describe those women and what they did to me!" Roshi wailed after Nadia, causing the students to turn and stare.

            "Heehee. Crazy." Nadia explained, twisting her finger into the side of her head.

            Where's Yoli?" Joe asked with a mouthful of pie, once Nadia had sat down.

            "Dunno." Nadia shrugged, taking a bite of her tuna fish sandwich.

            "Roshi got dirty in the Amazon?" A confused looking girl on the Vegeta table asked out loud.

            "Uh…no. It would seem he doesn't like to be dominated." Nadia shuddered, an evil mental image entering her head.

            "Go figure." The girl muttered, then resumed to eating her lunch.

            "God, where is that girl?" Nadia finished off her sandwich, and began searching the room for Yoli.

            "Maybe she decided she really did like Kakkorrot, after all." Joe joked.

            "God, I hope not. Joe, that's not even funny." Nadia said, dreading that Joe was right.

            "I'm sure she hasn't." Joe reassured Nadia, but not looking too confident.

            "C'mon." Nadia dragged Joe up, ignoring his protests of 'Hey, I haven't finished my pie! Mmmm, that pie is good, I can still taste…OW!'

            "Yeah! Proper videos! Yep, and he is totally naked, in the shower!" Nadia heard a girl hiss to her friend excitedly.

            "Who're they talking about…ow, Nadia? Nadia, I would like some blood to get to my hand!" Joe wrenched his wrist free from Nadia's grip.

            "Oh God, I hope she hasn't done anything stupid." Nadia groaned, breaking into a run, with Joe following close behind.

~*~

            "Catch Skittles…uh, I mean Vegeta, in the shower! Perfect angles, perfect sound, although I don't think people will be buying it at £25.99, yes, only £25.99, to listen to the peaceful running of the shower!" Yoli's high-pitched voice boomed around the bottom of the staircases, where she was situated with a fold-up table and piles that were metres high of videotapes.

            "Fuck!" Nadia cursed.

            "What is? Oh my God! Does that sign have Vegeta on it, uh…um…" Joe stammered, averting his glance.

            "Yes, that is a poster reading 'Vegeta-camera, Naked, Wet And Royalty! Only £25.99' with a doctored picture of Vegeta in stiletto's and nothing else sat on my computer chair." Nadia groaned inaudibly, smacking her forehead.

            "Uh…Nadia…uh…hi?" Yoli stuttered.

            "I'll fucking 'hi' you in a minute! What did I say? 'No copies of the tape', what did you do, SELL copies of the tape!" Nadia roared, stomping up to the table.

            "Ooooooo! Naked Vegeta!" Two girls rushed forward, threw money at Yoli and ran off towards their dorms with their new purchase.

            "Uh…guys, can you cover him up?" Joe pleaded, his eyes covered with his hands.

            "Cover up that God? That'd be a crime!" Yoli stated indignantly. "Uh…sure." Yoli hurriedly added, getting a cold stare from Nadia.

            "C'mon now, we better move this stuff before Vegeta sees it. He has a stick up his ass on a daily basis, he does not need to see this!" Nadia laughed, grabbing some T-shirts that read 'I've Seen My Favourite Prince In The Shower' and 'Veggie; Best Seen Wet'.

            "See what?" A familiar voice boomed.

            "Uh, guys. I know I have my eyes closed and all, but I'm guessing that's the star of Yoli's show?"

A/N2: Tsk, tsk. Yoli really is perverted!

            Quorky: Don't act like you wouldn't do it!

            Oh shut up! Sorry I haven't updated for…well, time!

            Quorky: Go on, tell them why. Fine, I will. She was at a Wheatus gig at the weekend. Having fun rather than working!

            Hey, it was good! I got to meet all the members at the Sound Check and got a funky sticker saying 'Wheatus Guest'. How cool?

            Quorky: Indeed.

            Are you jealous cos I didn't take you?

            Quorky: Monkey's don't get jealous.

            Ha! That's just funny! What about that time I ate the last banana? Or when I got my cat?

            Quorky: I'm not jealous! Psssh, why'd I be jealous of YOU?

            Fair enough.