The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z   

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey everyone! Thanks for the excellent reviews!

            "Fly, Veggie, fly!" Nadia called to the Saiyan Prince.

            "Shut up, bakayaro. Was it you screeching at the top of your lungs just now?" Vegeta demanded, his eyes rather dull and his hair slightly messier than usual.

            "Huh? Me? No, I'm a one-man woman! Why would I attempt to serenade your son?" Nadia replied indignantly.

            "Was it you?" Vegeta asked, a look of rage directed towards Sai.

            "No! I mean, Trunks is hot and all, but I'd serenade his window, not his dad's!" Sai stated, rather insulted by the prospect of serenading Vegeta's window.

            "What about that crazy, insane…oh." Vegeta said, noticing Yoli snoring.

            "Ok, I'm gonna regret this, but…why are you in Trunksy's room?" Sai asked.

            "Trunksy?" Vegeta wrinkled his nose in disgust. "I sleepwalk so I need to have the room farthest away from the stairs…why are you looking at me like that."

            "No reason, Vegeta." Nadia grinned, thinking of all the wonderful prospects that lay before her now she'd found out that Vegeta's window is across from hers and that he sleepwalks.

            "So…um…just out of curiosity…where is Trunks' room?" Sai asked, sliding in her question carefully and inconspicuously.

            "Do I look stupid to you, brat? I am the Saiya-jin Prince and I will not have you sneaking around at all hours perving on my son! Students these days get more and more like Roshi…" Vegeta hissed, shaking his head.

            "Wha…? Excuse me, but have I even tried to spy on you?" Nadia demanded.

            "Yes."

            "Huh? When?"

            "When you videotaped me in the shower, kusottare." Vegeta growled, remembering Yoli selling the videotapes to the University.       

            "Oh, hey Skittles. Miss me already?" Yoli asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes.

            "Why would I miss you, bakana onna?" Vegeta shot back.

            "Isn't it strange, as Dragon Ball Z characters are Japanese, shouldn't they speak Japanese. But they speak English with certain words or phrases in Japanese to confuse everyone. Peculiar." Sai mused as she climbed back into bed.

            "Ah well, fics don't have to make much sense. Neither do essays if you put it at the bottom of the pile 'cos then Bulma gets bored after the first ten and just grades the rest between A-C, by singing a little rhyme. The bottom paper always get marked A* for fun." Yoli informed the room.

            "Well, how's that gonna work now if we all try and put our essay at the bottom?" Nadia asked, confused.

            "Well you don't, duh! I get all the A*'s and you just hope Bulma lands on an A note when grading your paper!" Yoli stuck her tongue out at Nadia.

            "She's moving!" Vegeta hissed, referring to the girl who'd been serenading him.

            "Run, little girl, run!" Yoli screamed.

            "Don't bother, bitch! No one serenades my Trunksy and gets away with it!" Sai joined in.

            "Bye Veggie!" Nadia grinned, falling back onto her pillow. "Man, this University rocks!" She stated before drifting off to sleep, dreaming about sleepwalking Vegeta's.

~*~

            "So I go, 'Nu uh, I like Skittles more' and she goes, 'Nu uh, I like Cadbury's Marble more'…"

            "Cadbury's Marble?" Joe and Nadia asked simultaneously.

            "Huh? Oh yeah, her nickname for Vegeta, he his quite popular amongst candy. Anyways, I go 'No bloody way! I totally obsess over him!' and she's all 'I don't think so. He's the one covered all over my books and folders' and I say 'So what? That's nothing! I've sold VHS' of him naked, in the shower!' and she goes 'I know, I bought five copies. He's so hott!' and I'm all 'Hey bitch, he's mine!' and she's like 'Ha! What ya gonna do?' and I'm all 'This' and I punched her! Which is why I've got a detention with Piccolo later today. Wanna join me?" Yoli asked, out of breath after her long speech.

            "Um…sure?" Joe said, confused.

            "I guess so…" Nadia said, just going along with Joe.

            "Great! Now all you have to do is get into trouble! Great!" Yoli rubbed her hands together.

~*~

            "But I don't want to do it!" Joe whined.

            "Tough! You said you'd join me in detention!" Yoli hissed, pushing Joe through the classroom door.

            "Oh, hi Joseph. You forget something?" Chi Chi asked. She was in one of her nice moods…for once.

            "Um…no. I mean, yes. I just wanted to tell you something." Joe stammered, fidgeting with the sleeve of his jumper.

            "Yes?"

            "Uh…you have a really fat…uh…ass. I mean, it puts me off my work. I lose concentration 'cos it's so bloody big and I'll even pay for you to have liposuction or something because I don't mind as long as you…" Joe trailed off as Chi Chi's face turned colour. "Woah, didn't even know that colour existed!" Joe commented on Chi Chi's face.

            "Nande kuso? You stupid little kono yaro! How dare you speak to me like that?" Chi Chi demanded, grabbing the closest thing to her- the box of frying pans.

            "Fuck." Joe hissed as the box came flying towards his face.

~*~

            "Ok, Nadia. It's not that hard, just do it." Yoli egged Nadia on.

            "That's what you said about Joe! Look at him!" Nadia whined, pointing to Joe.

            "It didn't hurt…much." Joe managed to mumble out of his now huge lip. His eyes were starting to bruise and he had a bright red plaster stuck across the bridge of his nose. No doubt he'd end up with more scars to accompany the one from his eye to across his nose.

            "Yeah, your swollen lip is proof." Nadia muttered.

            "He got a detention, didn't he?" Yoli asked.

 "Fine, here I go."